All Your Love Is Revenge
by destiny's sweet melody
Summary: MariChat FWB AU. Pining away for someone isn't easy, especially when there's a perfectly attractive person right next to you. A stray thought leads to a crazy idea leads to a whirlwind of passion that leaves Marinette and Chat Noir in even more of a mess than when everything started.
1. It Started With A Whisper

**Disclaimer:** I don't own _Miraculous: Tales of Ladybug and Chat Noir_ or anything else recognizable found herein.

 **A/N:** Shows up to the fandom three years late with Starbucks! I binge-watched this show on a whim after I finished _Dragons: Race to the Edge_ and I FELL IN LOVE! I couldn't help but devour all the fan art, and now we're here!

I am MariChat trash; it's my fave side of the Love Square because Friends to Lovers is my jam.

This story takes place four years post-canon and has mild canon divergence after _Glaciator_ because I am technologically inept and don't know how to stream any of the latest episodes.

If my rambling so far hasn't turned you away, please enjoy my first _Miraculous_ fic! (I can't believe my first M-rated fic is for a children's cartoon -_-)

 **Warnings:** adult situations, mild language, fluff and (eventual) angst

* * *

 **Summary:** MariChat FWB AU. Pining away for someone isn't easy, especially when there's a perfectly attractive person right next to you. A stray thought leads to a crazy idea leads to a whirlwind of passion that leaves Marinette and Chat Noir in even more of a mess than when everything started.

* * *

 **All Your Love Is Revenge**

 **Ch. 1: It Started With a Whisper**

It's such a small and unnecessary thought that starts everything: _Chat Noir is kind of cute._

It's weird because Marinette _knows_ this. Objectively, of course. The skin-tight leather left very little to the imagination and in the four years since he became Chat Noir, his body had only become more defined. His physical strength had also led to a few intrusive thoughts that she'd rather not dwell on. He still had a boyish, mischievous smile, and his hair was still wild and gleaming gold. At eighteen - presumably - Chat was the kind of guy that girls would write love poems for if life was a sitcom.

So there was really no _actual reason_ for her to think those words.

But it was late and she was tired and he was there. She was running on fumes, caffeine, and sugar, but Friday Night Movie Marathons had been a tradition for the past three years and she didn't have the heart to turn him away.

So, it was all his fault, really. The fact that her room was set up in a way that made it seem like everything had been leading to this was also his fault.

The first thing to go were all the posters of Adrien.

Chat's balcony visit after her run-in with Glaciator had seemed like a one-time thing. It was kind and sweet and it reasserted in her mind that she cared deeply for her partner even if she couldn't reciprocate the feelings he had for Ladybug.

Then she got targeted by _another_ akuma! Alya made a joke that she was going to give Chloé a run for her money for most akumatizations - a _gross_ over exaggeration! Chloé was in the double digits at the time and the number just kept growing since - and Chat Noir apparently agreed. He had shown up on her balcony and made some joke about her being akuma bait and followed with, "What kind of superhero would I be if I didn't watch over you, Princess?"

She'd rolled her eyes but didn't kick him out and somehow "watching over her" became regular hangouts. When winter approached, she figured the least she could do was invite him into her room. Which meant that the posters had to go. She wouldn't be able to stand his teasing, and even though he had no idea she was Ladybug, she didn't think she would be able to look at him after. The collage on her desktop soon followed when she decided to play Ultimate Mecha Strike III with him for the first time. Another night, he had tugged on the string of her oversized copy of Adrien's schedule. She had managed to tackle him to the ground, rip it off its hinges, and throw it under her bed before he could catch a good glimpse of it. He was obviously curious, but had enough self-preservation instincts to not even look towards her bed until he left.

The schedule had been shredded and never replaced. She had his schedule memorized, anyway.

Alya had naturally been suspicious of the sudden lack of Adrien in her room, but she had managed to stutter out that she had chosen to focus on the _real_ Adrien instead of being distracted by his pictures from her eventual and inevitable conquest of his heart. Alya, bless her soul, had wholeheartedly approved of her newfound drive. That nothing had happened between them in three years didn't even seem to register.

The blackout curtains came next.

During one of their early Movie Marathons, they had severely overestimated their ability to stay up till dawn and had fallen asleep during a viewing of _Dawn of the Dead_. When they awoke, Chat was detransformed and in his panic had thrown a pillow into Marinette's face so hard she had fallen from her chaise onto the ground headfirst. After he finished burrowing into a blanket burrito and apologizing to her a million times, Marinette had brought cheese for him and decided that such a thing should never happen again.

Sure, the logical thing would be to limit their interaction as superhero and civilian, but he looked so. . . _happy_ every time she offered a new movie for him to see, that she felt like he needed it. Maybe he didn't have any friends beneath the mask and that was why he'd befriended Marinette - a girl he only saw occasionally because of akumas - so quickly. Chat was willing to risk his identity, and Ladybug's presumed wrath, just to spend a few more minutes with his friend, and she wasn't willing to take that from him.

It wasn't that difficult to convince her parents to buy her blackout curtains; she _was_ a known lover of sleep, after all. As long as she promised to only use them on weekends to keep out the morning sun so she wouldn't be even later than usual to school, they were happy to acquiesce to her eccentric request. Convincing her father to add shutters to the hatch leading to her balcony was a bit more difficult, but Tom Dupain was not a suspicious man, and he loved doting on his only daughter.

Chat had almost cried when she explained what they were for.

That, of course, led to sleepovers. Which led to extra pillows, and a neon green quilt she had made on a whim that Chat quickly claimed as _his_. Which, eventually, led to cuddling on her bed through the night. Without the fear of her discovering his secret identity, whatever concerns had been holding him back completely dissolved and Marinette frequently woke in pitch darkness enveloped in heat as Chat's limbs wrapped around her body in a viselike grip.

The fact that he was a cuddler shouldn't have been a surprise. Chat Noir was animalistic in a way that Ladybug wasn't. Not that ladybugs were known to be wild, but neither was she dying to sniff at every flower she saw. Chat was wild, though. He liked head pets and chin scratches; he curled up for cat naps. He liked placing his head on her lap and she was pretty sure he had kneaded her thighs once. He _purred!_

So, it was only half a surprise that he was a cuddler. It worked out, as she was a cuddler too.

It wasn't weird. Not at all!

The last thing to change, and the most surprising, was the intimacy.

It had happened so quickly and quietly that she hadn't noticed how easily they moved around each other. As Ladybug, they moved in synch as if they had been fighting alongside one another since they could walk. As Marinette, they shared dinners and chatted amiably in a way that bordered on domesticity.

It didn't occur to her that she wasn't supposed to be comfortable enough with him to walk around in a bathrobe. She trusted him with her life on a regular basis, she could trust him with her body. Especially since she knew he was devoted to her alter ego and didn't look at her the way other boys might. Even though puberty had blessed her with her mother's slim waist and wide hips if not her father's height, she still wore jeans and jackets that hid them well enough, while Ladybug wore tight spandex that left nothing to the imagination. She had seen the fanart. It would be flattering if it weren't creepy.

It didn't occur to her that most boys didn't enjoy braiding a random friend's hair or painting their nails.

She didn't stop to think that finishing each other's sentences was a hallmark of togetherness.

She hadn't even realized that they were so. . . _together_ until one day she absentmindedly fed him some nachos so that he wouldn't have to stop playing a video game without even looking up from the sketch she was working on. It was such a natural movement that she didn't have to think about it, and he didn't even flinch. It wasn't until his lips brushed against her fingers that she realized what she was doing and she pulled her hands to her chest, face burning crimson. Chat didn't so much as look her way.

She did her best to not think how the only time she had seen such a thing was when watching her parents.

She _certainly_ didn't think about the dream she had where they were married and had three kids. How even though she called them Hugo, Emma, and Louis, instead of being the picture perfect children of a model, they all had leather cat ears and tails. How even though she had woken up screaming "That's not how genetics work!" every once in a while the dream came back.

She really, really didn't think about how she had stopped waking up in a cold sweat from those dreams, and instead woke with a sleepy smile and feeling extra cuddly.

That was normal, right? They spent so much time together. She had convinced herself that she was his only solace in the world - save for Ladybug, whom he saw briefly during akuma fights and the occasional patrol. She couldn't control her dreams; might as well adapt. Right?

But none of that really explained the thought, _Chat Noir is kind of cute._

She was tired, this being her last year of lycée put all kinds of pressure on her to gain stellar grades, to study for _le bac_ , to prepare for university and apply for internships. Add to that the almost weekly akuma attacks and she was barely functioning. Yet she refused to turn Chat away - maybe he felt the exact same way, worrying about his future now that they were almost officially adults.

It was nearing one in the morning, they had chosen a cheesy rom-com to watch, and Chat was in the middle of throwing his head back and laughing his large, joyful laugh when she realized it. And then she realized she was watching him instead of the movie, and had been doing so for so long that she wasn't sure what the characters' names were anymore. And then she was speaking without thinking, and honestly it was all his fault.

"I wish I could love you instead."

Chat stiffened suddenly, a thousand emotions passing over his masked face before turning to her with an overly-large grin. "Thinking about your mystery boy again?" Marinette blushed because, no, she wasn't thinking about Adrien at all. "You know, it's not really _fur_ that you know who I love and you won't tell me who you love."

It's not really fair that she _was_ who he loved. Sort of. Except, not really, because he loved the illusion a couple of spots and superpowers allowed her to cast. It sort of cheapened the knowledge that somebody loved her, since he didn't love who she really was.

"You volunteered that information, so that's your own fault." She used her most snooty voice and stuck her tongue out at him. He poked her nose with the tip of a claw and she turned to face the screen. And immediately blushed as she saw the stars rolling around in bed. Rom-Coms sure had changed since she was a kid! "Love is stupid anyway. Why can't it be as easy as it is for them?"

Chat seemed to choke down laughter, "They're not in love! Haven't you been paying attention?"

Marinette blushed again as she remembered what she had been focusing on. "It's been a long week."

Chat nodded in solidarity and she wondered once again what kind of life he led behind the mask. He seemed to shake whatever thoughts he had and instead turned his attention back to the movie. "They're not in love, they're jilted. It's angry hate sex that unites them."

"That's comedic?" Marinette wondered.

"Friends with benefits are very in right now."

She sighed wistfully, "Now, there's an idea. Just cut out romance completely." She was tired, really, that was it. And he kept staring at her as if she deserved all the attention in the world. No one ever looked at plain Marinette that way. Especially not Adrien. "Then, instead of love, I wish I could have benefits with you."

A thick, charged silence descended in the room and she realized what she had said two seconds too late. Even the background chatter of the movie disappeared. Marinette was pretty sure she had blacked out somehow even though her eyes were wide open.

Then Chat coughed nervously, and asked with a strained voice, "Are you serious?"

 _This is where you laugh and say, 'of course not, silly kitty!'_ the logical part of her brain screeched, but her tongue refused to comply. Because she looked at Chat, at the tense set of his shoulders, and the hopeful look in his eyes, and she realized that maybe he knew _exactly_ how she felt. It wasn't fair that they were both stuck in such hopeless cases! Adrien would never love her, but she couldn't stop loving him, which meant Ladybug would never love Chat Noir.

"Love is stupid," she repeated, her voice quiet but resolute. "And yes, I would love to have benefits with you."

Something sharp and dangerous flashed in his eyes and that was all the warning she got before he descended on her, hands clasping her cheeks, mouth hungrily on hers. It was rough; there was teeth and spit and she thought for a moment that this wasn't what a first kiss was supposed to be like. Then she remembered Chat's words. It's angry hate sex that unites them and she felt herself shiver at the thought.

Chat purred in appreciation before suddenly pulling away, keeping her at arm's length with his hands on her shoulders. "Wait, when you say benefits, do you mean. . .?" His voice trailed off, seemingly afraid to say the forbidden word.

What did she mean? Kissing? Definitely, that was fun. Groping? Would probably be even more fun! But did she actually mean everything that came along with the friends with benefits label?

"Sex," she answered, some of Ladybug's surety slipping into her voice. "I mean sex."

Chat's face closely resembled a tomato, and she wasn't very sure he was breathing. She almost giggled at the idea that she broke the Casanova wannabe. "Like, right now?"

His fingers flexed nervously on her shoulders and that time she giggled, realizing that he was trying his best to not sound overeager. "Like, right now."

"Oh, thank God," he lunged for her and she found herself on her back, his body flush against hers. She couldn't think about how fast everything was happening. She couldn't think of anything but how hot she felt, waves of heat enveloping her from her head to her toes, coalescing into a knot somewhere in the middle.

The borderline pornographic sounds of the movie interjected in the moment and she couldn't help but snort into the kiss. She dissolved into giggles as he pulled away. "Don't laugh!" he chided, but he was holding back laughter as well which just made her laugh louder.

"Turn the dumb movie off!"

He harrumphed but hurried to comply and suddenly the room was as black as night. Something inside her twisted as she realized that meant he could detransform, he could take his clothes off, he could be with her in every sense of the word.

"Can you lead me to the bed?" She knew he could see everything perfectly with his night-vision and she didn't even question how she was managing to be so forward about everything. He's _Chat_ , she's always been weirdly comfortable with him. Ladybug may keep him at arm's length, partly to protect their identities and partly to discourage his crush, but Marinette was free to be herself in a way she wasn't even with Alya.

She expected him to tug her to her feet and walk her through the darkness, but instead he swept her off the ground and carried her like a bride across the threshold. She flushed at the thought before reminding herself that there was nothing romantic about this moment.

His surprise gentleness wore off when they reached the bed and he let her fall to the mattress like a sack of flour. She had to cover her mouth with her hands to stop the surprised shriek as well as the fit of giggles that followed. She kicked out in his direction but failed to make contact, and his snickering made her think she was off by a mile.

She heard him whisper familiar words and a green light blinded her just before he straddled her hips. His lips landed on the bridge of her nose and the surprised noise he made let her know that was an accident.

"Why would you detransform right now?" she asked petulantly. Everything would be more difficult if they were _both_ essentially blind.

He sucked his teeth, "I just wanted to, you know. . ." the bed shifted with his movement and she could picture him waving his arms around demonstratively. "To get on with it."

"Eager, Kitty?"

She meant to be teasing, but suddenly he was flush against her once again, his hands framing her face, lips brushing against hers as he said, "Very."

Her breath stuttered and she didn't think as she reached around his head to pull him down to her lips. Her legs wrapped around his waist and she could feel something against her most intimate spot and it took her a moment to realize it was his dick. It's not the first time she'd felt it. He's a cuddler and a teenage boy and sometimes in the morning things happen. After the first few times, they all but ignored its surprise appearances. It's just a biological reaction, nothing to be overly shocked about.

But this was different. This was because of her, because of _Marinette._ Not because of Ladybug or nature. She had done that to him, and it made her feel powerful somehow.

Her hips hitched upwards and he groaned into her mouth. She felt overheated suddenly, and she wriggled as she did her best to slip out of her pajama pants with zero space between her, the bed, and Chat. When he realized what she was doing, he eagerly gave her the space to strip down and chucked his own shirt over his head.

She tried her best to not think about what he looked like, and he did his best to make her forget about everything but his tongue in her mouth and his hands on her thighs. She ran her hands over his back and over the planes of the muscles she had seen hundreds of times through his suit and even in the darkness, unable to really see them, she blushed.

She reached lower, to the waistband of his pants, somehow managed to unbutton them and chucked them down to his thighs. Then, running on pure adrenaline, she reached into his boxer briefs. It was smoother than she expected, hard and warm, and she stroked it in curiosity, not even thinking about the sensuality in the motion.

Chat gripped her wrist tightly and she wondered if she did something wrong before he nipped at her lower lip. "You need to stop that if you want this to last longer than two minutes, Purr-incess."

She pulled her hand back, surprised at his words, suddenly shy. "You'd better stop making puns if you want this to continue."

He made an affronted noise, but his fingers tugged at the buttons of her pajama top and she was suddenly aware of what it was they were doing. She wondered if this was a bad idea. Wondered if this would affect the way Ladybug works with Chat Noir. It shouldn't; their weekly sleepovers hadn't changed anything, and this was just one more sleepover. It was sex, sure, but they weren't any more together than they were before. Friends with benefits wasn't that much different than friends that act like a married couple without realizing it.

The only possible problem she could foresee was what would happen if he found out she was Ladybug. Would he be angry that she let him tell her all his hopes and dreams without letting him know that there was no hope? Would he be happy that his first time was with his first love? Does it count as taking advantage of him, knowing that he would happily be with Ladybug-her, but not her-her?

Then his mouth was on her breast, and she couldn't think of anything at all.

* * *

She woke up to the early morning sun. The shutters on the hatch had been helpfully left open so that she could see she was alone in her bed. Her pajamas had been folded and left at the foot of her bed and there was an unfamiliar ache between her legs to convince her that nope, that wasn't a dream. She totally just lost her virginity to Chat Noir.

 _At least it's Saturday,_ she thought gratefully. She didn't have to see anybody until Monday, at which point her thoughts and feelings should be right back to the status quo.

"Marinette," Tkki's melodious voice sounded one part disappointed, and two parts angry.

She smiled nervously at her kwami, in no way prepared for the lecture that was sure to follow.

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 **A/N:** Are you still with me? This is probably as M-rated as any future scenes are going to go. I know, from personal reading experience, that there are much raunchier stories on this site, but with my luck, mine would be the one that gets deleted for being inappropriate. Besides, this is the first smut I've ever written, so I'd rather not try too hard.

These two are dorks, and their first time would be filled with laughable moments, fight me.

The title for this chapter comes from the song **Everybody Talks by Neon Trees** , and the fic title comes from **Bad Romance by Lady Gaga**. I started writing this at the same time I was writing **Unforgettable** where all the chapter titles are pulled straight from the chapter's dialogue, and honestly I don't want to think that hard anymore. This is purely self-indulgent shippy-ness.

Please let me know what you liked, didn't like, and what you thought could use improvement!

~ Destiny's Sweet Melody


	2. Like a River Flows Surely To The Sea

**A/N:** Do I have a plot? Yes. Do I know how to make the plot go?. . . Maybe.

 **Thank you to everyone** who reviewed and/or added this story to their alerts/favorites. It's strangely relieving to know that I'm not terrible at smut, especially since there will be more. Not in this chapter, but more.

* * *

 **All Your Love is Revenge**

 **Ch. 2: Like a River Flows Surely to the Sea**

The first thing Marinette did on that Saturday was run to the nearest open pharmacy.

Okay, no. The first thing she did was have her ear lectured off by Tikki who went on and on about secrets and safety and dangerous lines being crossed. It was nothing new, and she couldn't really focus on her words when every time she mentioned dangerous lines she thought of Chat Noir's tongue in her mouth and his dick inside her.

Which led to her squealing into her pillow for about twenty minutes. Followed by staring at her wall for another ten. At that point, Tikki stopped her lecture.

Then she took a shower, because what if her parents could _smell_ it? There's a smell, right? She had read enough bodice rippers to know that there's some sort of smell. Also a glow. Should she put make-up on? Does she need concealer? What is she concealing?

So after the lecture, extended freaking out time, shower, change of clothes, more freaking out, and somehow convincing her parents that there was no real reason she was up so early, she ran to the nearest open pharmacy.

Because last night they _may have_ forgotten something vitally important. And by may have, she meant they totally forgot to use a condom! And she wasn't about to become a statistic. Not now when she was doing so well in classes, and her teachers all said she was right on track for the university course of her dreams, and they still hadn't stopped Hawk Moth and she couldn't do that while nursing a baby!

 _Nobody ever mentioned sex came with so much stress!_ Of course, nobody else had sex with a superhero while hiding the fact that she was also a superhero.

Her face was crimson as she shyly asked for a morning after pill, despite the fact that the middle aged woman attending her didn't seem to care what she asked for. She bought a bottle of water so that she could take the pill before getting home. And then, feeling equal parts bold and embarrassed, she bought a box of condoms too.

Too filled with nervous energy to head straight back home, she wandered to the park and distracted herself on her phone. She researched the things she had been too shy to ask her parents - despite the fact that her parents did their best to give her a healthy sex education and spoke about open trust between them - or even Alya who, as of two months ago, had started a sexual relationship with Nino. She researched how long she would ache and if she would ache every time she did it. She researched if her sudden bout of anxiety was normal for girls her age. She checked if there was _actually_ some sort of sex related smell. She flushed and was pleased when she read that most women don't experience an orgasm their first time having sex, and was almost proud of herself for managing it. Well, Chat helped too, but men have it easier!

Her soiree into healthy sexual identity forums eventually led her to posts on tips for better sex, lists of tricks, and sites on kinks. Which eventually led her to walking to the nearest supermarket and buying enough canned pineapple slices to make a doomsday prepper weep because there were things she wanted to try and she would like to be considerate about them. She had to transform into Ladybug to take it all directly into her room because she _really_ wasn't ready to have that conversation with her parents. Especially since she couldn't really explain _who_ she was having sex with.

When she was thirteen, her mother had sat her down to have The Talk. Most of it was probably the usual mother-daughter talk of the birds and the bees, but it was the end that stuck with Marinette. At the end, Sabine had taken her hands, looked her in the eyes and said, "I know the ideal is to wait for your wedding night, to find one person that you will spend the rest of your life with and give them your virginity, but that's not always possible. You are _more_ than your chastity, and you will be no more or less than any other woman in the world if you have one or five or twenty partners in your life. All I ask is that when the time comes, even if you're fifteen, you will tell me so I can help you be responsible. And that you will bring the person that stole your heart to meet your papa and me."

Marinette had promised she would, and she had always assumed she would be able to keep her promise. She sighed as a tiny kernel of guilt took up residence in her heart.

One day she would keep her promise to her maman. But not now. And not with Chat.

* * *

Sunday was blessedly uneventful. There were no akuma attacks and she spent the day interchanging texts with Alya on and off. There was no mention of Adrien or Paris' superhero duo and she felt as if the heavens themselves were smiling on her.

Monday, on the other hand. . .

She thought she was used to keeping secrets by now. This one was especially easy to keep since no one had any reason to so much as suspect her of having a tryst with a masked man. Or any sort of tryst at all. She had come to terms with the fact that she was glaringly obvious in her crush on Adrien, and everyone seemed to be under the impression that she was saving herself for him. Because she was. Or had been. Whatever.

The point was that there was no reason for her to feel like she was being observed at all times. That didn't change the fact that she did. When Alya ran up to her excitedly in the morning she almost thought she wanted to interview her. Turns out she wanted to show her the green and orange wire bracelet Nino had made for her, and the sweetness of the gesture distracted Marinette until they got to class.

Then the day got worse as everything reminded of her sex. _Everything!_ She felt like a teenage boy that had just discovered his sexual drive, mindlessly doodling phallic imagery on every available surface. Seriously, Chloé making a snide remark about her bed hair should not make her flush because she remembered her hair spread on her pillow as Chat thrust above her. Alya asking her why she was being unusually subdued instead of sassing the blonde back like usual only made things worse because then Nino expressed concern.

And _Adrien!_ Adrien stared. Stared in a way he never had before and she had the fleeting thought that he knew somehow. She immediately dismissed the thought. Whatever glow she had - her mom had mentioned she seemed unusually chipper that morning - had long since faded. She was just plain Marinette again. Besides, Adrien was so innocent that even if she was glowing bright enough to blind him he wouldn't be able to connect the dots.

She was only worried he would find out because if he did he would think her unavailable. She was being ridiculous!

Her only reprieve came during the time set aside for their literature projects. The teacher had decided to challenge them by having them do projects on poems in languages that they couldn't speak. Alya had a Japanese _waka_ poem, Nino had a Cantonese poem, and Adrien had a Ghanaian poem to read and write a thesis around.

Marinette had an English poem, which everyone else in class envied, because they figured it would be the easiest to research. She'd be happy if it was any other English poem. _The Highwayman_ by Alfred Noyes nettled her fiercely. Tragic romance had never been her cup of tea, and the romance between Bess and the robber was particularly bad in her opinion as not only was the woman sacrificed for the sake of an outlaw, but he ignored her wish for his survival and got himself killed anyway.

"It's romantic," Alya shoved at her shoulder.

"It's idiotic," she argued. "And sexist. And pointless! What is the point of this poem? Everybody dies?"

Alya snorted at her dramatics, "People do stupid things for love."

"Love is stupid," she shot back without thinking and saw Adrien stiffen in the corner of her eye. She realized what she must sound like: bitter and jilted and entirely unattractive. "I mean, that kind of love is stupid. Disney told me love makes you strong, not gets you killed."

The journalist-in-training chortled at her words and all seemed to be forgotten as everyone turned to their own work.

* * *

She had never been happier to have school finish when the final bell rang. Right up until the moment Alya threw her arm around her shoulders and invited her to get ice cream.

"Er - I - um, I can't today. I have a doctor's appointment."

Alya looked at her weirdly, "Are you feeling sick?"

"No, no! I just - it's just a normal check up. This was just the only time my doctor had available."

"Oh, well then, want me to go with you?"

"No! I- _ahem_ \- no, it's no big deal. You can go get ice cream, maybe hang out with Nino. . . or something."

Alya stared, Marinette smiled widely, then the brunette shrugged. "If you say so."

Marinette did her best to not look relieved. There was no way she could explain to her best friend that she had scheduled the first available appointment with a gynecologist for birth control pills. Condoms were surprisingly expensive, and she'd probably blow through her meager savings in a few months if she had to buy packs of five or six at a time. Then she had to stop herself from blushing furiously as she realized she was planning on having sex with Chat for the next few months, at least.

* * *

The lies kept piling up. At dinner, she'd had to explain her late arrival at home after school by saying Alya had invited her for ice cream. Which was technically true, it just wasn't the reason why she was late. Every time her mother smiled at her, she felt that little kernel of guilt grow. She was so trusting, both her parents were, and they believed that they had raised their daughter to trust them with anything.

And she did! Really, she did. It was only anything relating to the miraculouses that she kept hidden from them for their own protection. Even Tikki agreed it was for the best! And Chat fell under that category. There was a part of her that was sure her parents wouldn't be disappointed in her if she admitted she had entered a friends with benefits arrangement. They did their best to make sure she felt loved and accepted, and even if it wasn't the _best_ sexual relationship to have, they wouldn't try to make her feel ashamed for it.

If it was anybody else, she would tell them, she was sure. Maybe not immediately, maybe it would take a few days, but she would tell them. Maybe she would even try to convince her partner to come meet her parents if they hadn't already, because she had _promised._ Promises were important, especially promises made to her parents.

If it was anybody else, she wouldn't feel so alone. She wouldn't have to go to a gynecologist for the first time all alone, her mother would have been there to hold her hand and talk about alternative contraceptives. She would be able to talk about it with Alya, spend an entire night talking and laughing about it like they had after Alya confessed her first time. She would even be grateful for her father mercilessly teasing her and jokingly offering to hunt down her suitor.

If it was anybody else, she would still be filled with that euphoric, nervous energy she'd woken up with on Saturday morning. Instead, she was stuck with an anxious sort of dread. She was afraid somebody would find out about Chat Noir and somehow make the connection with Ladybug. People already thought they were a couple, if anybody saw him visiting another blue-eyed, blue-haired girl, they wouldn't be crazy to expect her to be the real Ladybug.

She ate sparingly and excused herself to her room under the pretense of having homework, but went straight to her bed. All she wanted was sleep. To wake refreshed and unafraid. A part of her wished she'd wake up and it would still be Friday night with Chat still laughing at some cheesy rom-com, and nothing had happened at all.

Then she heard a knocking from above.

She tensed. It was Chat, _of course_ it was Chat. Who else could it be? But he never came by on Mondays. Friday nights were tradition, and he dropped in sometimes after particularly difficult akumas, but he never came by on Mondays. She got the feeling Mondays were unusually busy for him and she wondered if he had a part-time job. She never lingered on the thought for long, because that was dangerously close to trying to discover his identity, but now she was completely unprepared because he _never came on Mondays!_

She peeked at her purse, remembering the little case of twenty-eight pills she had gone out of her way to get, and sighed. There was no reason to ignore him. She was obviously planning on repeating the experience, there was no denying that. Unless, of course, he was coming by to tell her that he regretted having sex with her and never wanted to see her again.

That was unlikely. Also unnecessary. He could simply never come back, it wasn't like she could track him down. That is, Marinette couldn't; Ladybug would still have to work with him. And even if he never wanted a repeat performance, they could still be friends. He could just show up on Friday, watch a movie, and never mention it again. They could go back to their weird friendship and she wouldn't complain one bit.

It was much more likely that he was here because he wanted to see her, was so eager to see her he couldn't wait until Friday. The thought that he had spent the day as hot and bothered by everything as her crossed her mind and she clenched her thighs as a now familiar feeling began in the pit of her stomach.

Before she knew what she was doing, she was on her feet and throwing the hatch open. She froze when she saw him in the moonlight.

"Hi." Did she sound breathless? Why did she sound breathless?

"Hi," he smiled, and at least he sounded a little breathless too.

Her mind caught up to the situation after a few seconds of smiling and she realized she was blocking his way into the room. She let herself fall to her bed and called up, "Are you coming in?" Then she wanted to smack herself as she realized what it must seem like she was offering.

He effortlessly jumped into the room, letting the hatch fall shut behind him, and stood at the foot of her bed, more awkward than he had been even the first time she had invited him in. His tail twitched behind him. "So, how have you been?"

She snorted, she couldn't help it. "As well as I was, what, two days ago?"

"Two days, twenty hours, and thirty-three minutes," he replied automatically and then visibly tensed. "Give or take."

Marinette felt herself flush at the idea that he was honestly counting the minutes since the last time he saw her. She must have been really good in bed. "I didn't know timekeeping was a talent of yours."

He smirked, grateful that she didn't make a big deal about it. "It's a gift, and a curse."

She laughed at the familiar dialogue from Alya's beloved superhero comic books. "And how have you been these past two days, twenty hours, and thirty-three minutes?"

"Thirty-four now," he teased. Whatever tension he had been holding seemed to fall right off him and he flopped down onto her bed across from her. "And, honestly? It's been weird."

She was surprised at his candor, but he had always been braver than her. "Honestly? Same."

He snickered at the way she sighed heavily and placed her forehead on her knee. "It feels weird to keep things from my parents, I don't usually do that." Well, unless if it's for their own good. Tikki agrees, it can't be wrong! "And Alya, my best friend, she was completely honest with me about her first time. That's something girls _do_ , but I can't tell her anything and it feels like a lie."

"Well," he shifted nervously. "You can tell her. I mean, you don't have to tell her it was with _Chat Noir_ , but you can say it was with somebody from outside your school or something."

"No chance," she shook her head. "She knows all about my. . . feelings, and she'd want to know who managed to make me stray and she wouldn't let up until she found out the truth. Even giving her a fake name could backfire."

"Oh, I'm sorry."

She snapped to attention and looked him straight in the eye, "Well, don't be _sorry!_ It's not like I regret it or anything. Even if you were somebody else, I'm sure I'd find a way to complicate this situation. Besides, you're like my closest friend, and I. . . I'm _glad_ that my first time was with you."

There. She said it. Her face was so hot she thought she might faint, but she said it. The chances that her first time, or any time for that matter, would be with Adrien were next to nothing. She'd rather it be Chat than some random hook up in university or a drunken mistake at a club.

She was grateful he was blushing too. "I'm glad you were my first time, too."

His voice was so sincere, his eyes were so earnest, that she had to look away. Her eyes landed on her bag again. "So, I. . . I was wondering if - if there was going to be a next time?"

Some sort of strange strangled noise made her look at him. His face was still crimson, but his eyes were wide and his mouth was open. Was that too direct? Did he not want to? Maybe this was meant to be a one and done type deal. First time with your best friend was okay, but a regular occurrence might be a little strange. Or something.

She tried to backtrack, "I just meant - you don't have to if you don't want to. I just thought -"

"I have condoms!" He offered a little too loudly, causing her to wince and pray her parents hadn't heard.

When a moment passed without Tom Dupain barging in and demanding to know who was in his precious little girl's room, she breathed a sigh of relief. "S-so do I," she admitted shyly.

He smiled nervously and the bed moved as he shifted closer to her. "So, are we really doing this?"

She covered her own smile with her hand and nodded. She wasn't entirely clear what _this_ was, and she was certain he wasn't sure either, but whatever it was she wanted it. His proximity alone caused goosebumps to appear on her flesh and her stomach to flutter with anticipation. It felt _good_ to be with him. It couldn't be wrong.

"Yes, we are."

He grinned widely, cat ears standing at attention. "I'll get the lights!"

* * *

 **A/N:** This chapter's title comes from **Can't Help Falling In Love by Elvis Presley** , which includes the lines "Shall I stay? Will it be a sin?" which I thought fit the tone of this chapter quite well. It's also about fools falling in love, and if that's not the Love Square, I don't know what is!

 **The Highwayman by Alfred Noyes** is a poem that I love. I was intrigued by the story and the tragedy since the first time I read it in Middle School, but even then I thought the ending was something to disagree with. **The basic story is** Bess, the innkeeper's daughter, falls in love with the highwayman, an outlaw. A spurned suitor sees and gets a posse to wait for the robber in her room where she's held at gunpoint. When she realizes he's about to be captured she shoots herself and the sound causes him to flee. The next day, he hears Bess was killed and turns right back around and is killed. But, you know, fancy!

I have no idea how easy or hard contraceptives are to get in France and since it's not that vital to the story, and researching higher education alone gave me a headache, I decided to base it on personal experience. **Don't at me about inaccuracies in the French Health System.**

Hope you enjoyed the fluff! The first part of their relationship will be pure fluff, because it's so uncomplicated. Except it really, really isn't, and that's where the angst comes in.

Let me know what you liked, didn't like, and what you thought could use improvement!

~ Destiny's Sweet Melody


	3. Even When You Look Away

**A/N:** I know it's unlikely for them all to be in the same class until graduation, but considering that according to the show there are thirty people in the entirety of Paris, I figure I could be excused. Besides, I love this class too much!

#SuperSquadGoals makes a surprise appearance. This is essentially pure headcanons since I have _no_ idea how they'll all interact with each other. And Rena Rouge better make a comeback because I haven't even seen _Sapotis_ but I love her already! However, that means that in this fic, **how she got her miraculous is different** , and Marinette doesn't know Alya is Rena. I just assumed Master Fu would choose everybody, because, you know, they're _fourteen!_

I dithered on posting this because I was legitimately scared as to how you all would react to my portrayal of the other miraculous holders, but they're "back up" and won't be in this fic much. So if you don't like them, just pretend the scene they're in doesn't even exist!

 **Thank you to everyone** who reviewed, added this story to their alerts, and/or favorites!

* * *

 **All Your Love Is Revenge**

 **Ch. 3: Even When You Look Away**

Marinette squealed as she saw her reflection in the bathroom mirror. Her neck and chest were _covered_ in purple marks. She blushed furiously, making the marks even more prominent. Chat had paid an unusual amount of attention to the area before, during, and even after they had both come, but she hadn't thought it was _that_ bad!

How was she supposed to hide this? Should she wear a scarf? No, the weather hadn't turned yet. A turtleneck? Turtlenecks were classics, right? No, they were synonymous with hickies! Everyone would know, or at the very least suspect. Make-up? Concealer? She definitely had something to conceal now.

How was she going to get past her parents before she could put the make-up on?

 _Marinette, your parents are downstairs already!_ A voice that sounded suspiciously like Tikki reminded her. Good Tikki voice. Tikki voice is wise. Tikki voice is smart. Listen to the Tikki voice.

The real Tikki was not helpful at all. She made snide comments and pointed reminders of important boundaries, but made no offer to help at all.

Marinette was not a make-up artist, but she was impressed by how she was able to blend the foundation onto her skin and make Chat's love bites disappear. She seemed practically normal. Except. . . happier? Was that the power of that mysterious glow?

Even her mom noticed, "Your skin seems so bright, Marinette!"

There was no suspicion in that comment. They had no reason to suspect anything. Not only because they believed they had an open dialogue about everything, but because she had spent last night in her room. Her room in the attic where no one could conceivably enter without passing by her parents' room first. Unless they had superpowers. But that was implausible; what would she have to do with a superhero?

She panicked. "Pineapple!" She shouted and then clutched at her cheeks in embarrassment. "I've been eating a lot of pineapple. . . because I heard it was good for your skin. Because of vitamins."

"Well, it's really working," her dad commented and she thought she might die!

Excusing herself from the house with a bit of toast for breakfast, she began her way to school, lamenting the fact that it was further than her collége was. Still, there was an unfamiliar spring in her step that made the journey go by quicker than usual.

She was still the last to class, but that was to be expected by now.

No reason for anybody to look twice at her entrance at all.

She was pretty sure she wasn't imagining the way conversation slowly died as she made her way to her seat, though. She hadn't sweat the make-up off, had she? Deciding that discretion was the better part of valor, she simply smiled widely and pretended she couldn't feel anybody staring at her.

Feigning ignorance, she asked Alya, "Is something going on?"

Her best friend startled into the present. Her eyes flicked from Marinette to Adrien and then back. "No, of course not. You just look . . . different than usual. Did you put on make-up?"

"Just a little," Marinette demurred, referring to her pink gloss.

"Oh well, if I didn't know better, I would think - I mean, of course I don't _think_. I just think you should know, in case someone mentions it. You look like -"

"Oh my _God!_ Marinette Dupain-Cheng!" Chloé's high-pitched voice interrupted Alya's rambling. "Did you _finally_ find someone willing to take your V-card?"

Afterglow gone, just like that. Marinette was pretty sure she had paled so much she resembled bone.

"Oh, no way!" That was Kim's voice. Despite his words, he didn't sound scandalized, he sounded like he had found a treasure trove of limited edition trading cards. "Our beloved saint joins the ranks of us fallen."

"Oh, shut up, idiot!" Alix declared, "You should know better than to believe Chloé."

"I don't," Kim agreed. "But you can see it all over her."

"That's bullshit!" Marinette cried before she could stop herself. "You can't tell. There's no way to tell."

You could hear a pin drop. Alya was staring at her through wide, unseeing eyes. Nino was half-risen from his chair, as if he was about to tackle Kim until her outburst stopped him. Adrien was _very_ determinedly not looking at her. When had she stood up? She was suddenly aware what her violent protest sounded like. _The lady doth protest too much._ Fuck Shakespeare, honestly.

Kim _really_ didn't know when to let up. Too many blows to the head, she supposed. She should be more understanding, really, but his next words were the worst blow she could have received. "Was it Adrien?"

"Of course not! Don't insult my Adrikins like that!"

"Chloé, _shut up._ " Adrien ground out, obviously horrified at the very idea.

"Leave Adrien out of this," Marinette stomped her feet, determined to defend him even though his repulsion at the thought cut her deep.

"Was it Nathanaёl, then? How about it, buddy, did you finally hit that?" Kim hooted.

"I most certainly did not!" Nathanaёl's entire body was the same shade as his hair. "Leave me out of this too. And stop teasing Marinette, she's too nice for your bullying."

"Oh, come on! We're all friends here!"

"Kim, I swear, one more word!" Nino warned, leaving his usual psychedelic vocabulary behind and sounding more dangerous for it.

The sound of her boyfriend's voice seemed to rouse Alya from whatever daze she was in and she rose to stand beside Marinette, placing her hands supportively on her shoulders. "Yeah, it's not funny, and it's utterly ridiculous! Marinette here is mature enough to know better than to sleep with just anyone."

Kim flinched at the cheap shot, and Marinette felt guilty that she caused Alya to reference his history, especially in front of the others. Last year, he had dated Alix for a few months before starting a love affair with Max for about a week before hooking up with Lila until she dumped him for a university student. All of them were amicable break-ups. Lila's less so, but no one in their class really liked Lila. Despite all that, despite his chemistry with Lila, and how close he was with Max, and how perfect he seemed with Alix, he never _really_ got over Chloé. Marinette doubted he ever would as long as she was right there, within reach, but never sparing him more than a second glance.

He had just gotten tired of waiting, and wanted to experience life to the fullest, and at least it was with people he knew and trusted, and . . . well, shit, she _had_ joined his ranks.

She didn't deserve Alya's defense. She should have just gone along with Kim's teasing instead of arguing in her own, faulty defense. Maybe she shouldn't take Chloé's bullying, but even Chloé had managed to stay faithful to Adrien.

 _Even Chloé had managed to stay faithful to Adrien._

She ran out of the room before the tardy bell rang, and was only dimly aware of the fight that broke out after her.

The bathroom was blessedly quiet and apparently empty and she leaned on a sink, trying hard to not cry. Why did this keep happening? How could she be so happy one moment and so utterly torn the next?

She wasn't being unfaithful to Adrien, she knew that. There was nothing to be unfaithful to! They were friends; friends didn't get a say in another friend's sex life. He had no right to feel angry or betrayed and. . . he probably didn't care anyway. Chloé was faithful to him because she was one hundred percent sure that they would be married one day. And maybe she was right. Maybe, at the end of everything, rich, beautiful, blond Adrien would be married to rich, beautiful, blonde Chloé and Marinette would be alone.

Why shouldn't she enjoy herself while she could? And why was that anybody's business?

Nobody made a fuss when they found out Kim had sex with Max at least once while they were together. It didn't change anything because they didn't change. They didn't start holding hands or making out in the hallways, they were the same as they always had been and so was she.

Lila's reputation as the "school's resident vixen" only seemed to add fuel to her fame. But because Marinette was the "beloved saint", the class president, the all-around good girl, that somehow made it wrong for her to have sex?

She thought they were past the judging women by their virtue stage of human society.

She opened the tap and splashed water onto her face to cool her overheated skin. She needed to calm down! She needed to go back to class with a smile on her face and her head held high. She needed to be calm to convince them she was a virgin . . . or that she wasn't and didn't care what they thought. She wasn't sure yet and Tikki once told her that silence could be the loudest answer.

She was surprised Tikki hadn't popped out of her purse to console her - disappointed or not, she still cared about Marinette - until she heard a toilet flush. The kwami had obviously detected that they weren't alone and had wisely stayed quiet.

Marinette tensed and her feeling of despair only multiplied when she saw Lila Rossi step out of a stall. She quietly washed her hands right next to Marinette and shook them dry. Then she looked at the smaller girl and sighed, "You washed your makeup off."

Marinette squealed and clutched at her neck, embarrassed to have been caught. At least the school's vixen shouldn't be able to cast judgment on her. Probably.

"You can borrow mine, if you want," Lila offered and Marinette was so surprised all she could do was nod dumbly. Lila seemed to sense that she was too numb to do much, because she only scoffed before applying the makeup onto her neck without prompting. "We're not the same skin tone, but I know a few tricks that should make it less notable. Next time, tell your whoever to keep it below the neckline."

The brush tickled at her throat and something else tickled at the edges of her eyes, "Thank you."

Lila shrugged and placed her cosmetics in her bag before heading towards the door as if she covered Marinette's hickies all the time. Just before opening the door, she stopped. "Somebody say something to you about that?"

She nodded mutely again.

"Screw them," she threw over her shoulder as she strutted out of the bathroom. "Your body was made to be enjoyed, so enjoy it!"

* * *

Marinette had - very briefly - stopped to think how having sex with Chat would affect her being Ladybug. She didn't think there would be much difference. As far as he was concerned, nothing had changed between them as long as she was wearing spots and a mask. And she was confident she could act like nothing was different from usual. She wasn't a _terrible_ actress. Okay, she wasn't good at acting at all, but acting aloof and uninterested shouldn't be that difficult during an akuma battle.

During patrol, however, when there was nothing but the background noise of the city she had learned to ignore. . . Things were a bit more difficult.

Patrols were rare. They weren't vigilantes, and there was nothing they could really do about common criminals without risking the wrath and fear of the citizenry. They usually picked one day of the month to make a quick scan of the city to make sure there were no easily missed akumas like Vanisher around. All five of them now.

She was relieved to see Rena and Carapace already on the roof with Chat Noir. She could focus on Rena; girl talk was normal.

"Why, hello there, My Lady," Chat said just as she landed and she tripped over her own feet.

 _Not the_ best _start._

"You okay, girl?" Rena asked as she helped Ladybug steady herself.

"Yeah, I'm good. Just recovering from a little cold I had recently."

"You shouldn't push yourself too hard. You have to take care of yourself first if you wish to take care of Paris." Carapace told her and for a moment he sounded so much like Master Fu that something inside her ached.

"Ladybug, do you need help?" Queen B's high voice all but screeched in her ear as the yellow clad girl wrapped her in a bear hug.

"I'm fine, B. Please let go."

B pouted but pulled back. It had taken a while, but she had learned to control the worst of her fangirl tendencies. It was nice sometimes to be so appreciated by someone that had no romantic interest in her like Chat, or who she was forced to constantly lie to like Alya. Sometimes, she thought, B was her favorite.

"Shall we get to work? B, how about you come with me this time?"

Queen B screamed out her joy for all of Paris to hear, but Chat pouted. "Do we really need a group of three?"

"Ew, no!" B stomped her foot. "She wants me, just me, to patrol with her, you dumb cat. Go patrol somewhere else."

"If Ladybug is feeling under the weather, it may be wise for her to have extra help," Carapace offered.

"Ugh, but if we had to, can't we take the turtle?"

Marinette would love that, but Ladybug had always insisted she and Chat were a team. She couldn't suddenly drop him out of the blue.

"Uh, no way! You keep your sticky hands off my boo!" Rena threatened before placing a small kiss on Carapace's cheek. His cheeks turned rosy. They were so sweet she could die!

When the duo had declared themselves as a couple to the others a year ago, Chat had used that as proof that superheroes - that is, Chat and Ladybug - could date. She had argued that half a relationship was a hollow sort of feeling and had given them a month tops. They were still together and Ladybug had been proven wrong. She was glad she had been, they were so in love with each other!

That was the key, though. They were in love with _each other._ If Chat Noir and Ladybug dated, Chat would be completely devoted to his Lady, and she would be. . . okay with it. She knows now that the sex would be great, but it would be unfair to him _and_ to her because she wouldn't be able to live with the guilt.

The arrangement Chat and Marinette had was perfect. There was no hollow sort of feeling because they didn't have half a relationship, they had zero part of one. They both went into it with their eyes wide open and their hearts firmly in their own possession.

Ever the voice of reason, Carapace interjected. "If Ladybug wishes to focus on Queen B's training tonight, and Queen B refuses to work with Chat, then naturally the answer is that Rena Rouge should go with them."

Rena instantly perked up, "Ooh, like a girls night. I'm in!" She jumped over to the other two females in the group. "See you later, babe!"

Carapace dropped the sagacious act and finger-gunned his girlfriend with a wink. Not for the first time, Ladybug figured that he wasn't even half as calm and wise beneath the mask as he was with it on. She certainly wasn't the fearless, ultra-capable leader they all thought she was in civilian life.

"Right, training. Let's go then!"

* * *

Marinette huffed angrily at her computer. She was trying hard to get started on her literature project, even though the professor had given them almost the entire school year to finish it. All she had managed to type so far was _The Highwayman is freaking stupid!1!11!_

Somehow, she doubted the school would appreciate such a succinct thesis statement.

She couldn't think of anything other than how much the poem pissed her off. The problem was she couldn't focus on _that_ for too long, either. All she could really think about was her bed and what had happened on it. Twice.

Her gaze roamed to her bed without her volition, and she noticed Chat's neon green quilt bunched up in a corner. She wondered if it smelled like him. The thought, bizarrely, turned her on.

She groaned at herself in frustration before suddenly remembering that she had never needed a man to please herself until Saturday. "Tikki, privacy," she declared as she stalked to her bed.

She heard the kwami huff before sequestering herself in the dollhouse Marinette had set up for her. It had been _awkward_ going through puberty with an ancient being that didn't know about personal boundaries. Tikki's innocence and Marinette's own embarrassment had led to more than a few interruptions of her alone time. The first time, she had burst into tears, horrified she had gotten caught and terrified the kwami would think less of her. That Tikki assured her that previous miraculous users had done the same thing right in front of her didn't help calm Marinette.

"They also pissed on the ground, Tikki, things have changed."

It was decided eventually that private time should be _private_ , so Tikki went into the dollhouse and Marinette pretended that meant the kwami was in an inescapable, soundproof prison.

She laid on her back and grabbed the quilt, pressing it to her face. The scents were muted; she could detect peppermint, and sweat, and something mildly sour. But she could also detect cinnamon and flour and it took her a moment to realize that those scents were hers. The quilt didn't smell like _him_ , it smelled like _them._

That managed to somehow turn her on more.

She slipped her hand beneath her waistband, eager to reach completion, and almost missed the thump on her roof. _Almost._

Opening her eyes, she almost shrieked. Chat Noir was at the hatch, peeking in through the shutters, obviously content to watch her finger herself.

 _No, no, no. Let's not do that._

She shakily jumped to her feet and unlocked the hatch to let him in. His smile was devious as he sauntered down the steps. She realized too late she was still clutching his quilt.

"Thinking about me, Princess?" He tugged on one end of the green cloth. "Did you miss me that much?"

How did his stupid teasing make the room feel so charged? It must be because she had already worked herself up.

She tugged the quilt away from him, using it to cover half her burning face. "What are you doing back so soon? Did you miss me that much?"

She put as much mocking as she could into her voice as she threw his words back to him, but he only smiled. "Yes, I did." Damn his honesty. "Lights?"

He was lucky she had already worked herself up so much.

"Lights."

* * *

She woke in darkness this time, but she wasn't alone. Her legs were still intertwined with his, and her head was resting on his chest. He was breathing evenly but she could tell he was awake by the hardness against her inner thigh and the almost imperceptible way his fingers twitched against her lower back.

 _He's kneading again._ She did her best to banish the laughter from her voice. "How long have you been awake?"

His fingers jerked in surprise. "Not that much longer than you." There was something about his voice that told her that was probably a lie, but she didn't have the energy to call him out on it. "I should go soon."

"You're going to go with this?" She pressed her thigh into the hardness she felt and giggled when she heard him hiss.

He pulled her flush against his chest and kissed the top of her head. "You ready for round two?"

She thought of all the resources and honest stories that she had read. Remembered reading that one day, probably soon at the rate she was going, she would be able to have sex till the dawn if she found a willing and able partner. But, at the moment, it was probably not the best of ideas.

"Well, maybe not," she confessed. Before he could pull away, however, she reached down between them and grasped his length.

She had no experience giving handjobs, and wasn't even sure if she was doing it correctly. Nothing she had read, whether fictional or factual, had prepared her for the actual experience. The awkward angle made it impossible for her to keep an even pressure as she stroked him from root to tip, and it wasn't doing her wrist any favors. But the way he trembled against her and clutched at her as if she was his only connection to life made her feel like she couldn't be doing too bad of a job.

When he came into her hand and on her belly, she almost jumped at the foreign sensation. She had half a mind to complain about the mess on her bed, but couldn't bring herself to when her reward was him kissing her breathless.

He kept his forehead pressed against hers, "You're far too good to me."

"Yes, I am. Don't you forget it," laughter laced her voice.

"Never," he promised and kissed her forehead before releasing her from his hold. The mattress moved erratically as he blindly grabbed for his clothes. "I'll be back on Friday."

"On Friday?" she teased. She found it hard to believe, as it was only Tuesday and it was the third time he'd visited.

"Of course," he declared and she could picture his wide grin in her mind. "Fridays are movie nights."

* * *

 **A/N:** I don't know, maybe my friends and cousins are lying liars, but they swear they can _tell_ when somebody's had (good) sex.

 **Kim isn't an asshole, just socially inept.** It's the jock in him, poor boy. I like KimxAlix and KimxMax, so I just included both. You may choose your own endgame.

 **Why is Lila being so nice?** Well, she hasn't actually interacted with _Marinette_ yet, so there's no way to tell how that will go, and I saw a fanart of Lila/Volpina hating Ladybug but being violently overprotective of Marinette (basically the opposite of Chloé/Queen B) and that's all I want now. Besides, I enjoy portraying girls supporting girls. None of that fighting over boys nonsense.

 **How does Carapace/Rena work if DJWifi is canon?** Are they cheating on each other with each other? This _will_ be addressed later on, but you can probably guess, it's not that complicated.

This chapter's title comes from **Girlfriend by Avril Lavigne,** the full lyric being "even when you look away, I know you think of me."

As always, tell me what you liked, didn't like, and thought could use improvement!

~Destiny's Sweet Melody


	4. You Need A Good Girl To Blow Your Mind

**A/N:** I am _hoping_ to write a realistic progression of a sexual relationship. As well as a realistic portrayal of a young woman taking control of her sexuality. Let me know how it goes, yeah?

* * *

 **All Your Love Is Revenge**

 **Ch. 4: You Need a Good Girl To Blow Your Mind**

Marinette felt herself blush and hunched over the book on her desk as if to hide it from prying eyes, despite knowing the only other eyes in the room were Tikki's and she already knew what she was reading. Why? _Why_ had she bought a Kama Sutra book?

Wasn't this a thing middle aged housewives bought to rekindle the dying flame in their decades long marriage? She'd only been with Chat for about two weeks! She wondered for a moment if he could still tell her down to the minute how long it had been since they first had sex, but shook the thought away. That wasn't important! What _was_ important was that her arrangement with Chat was still practically new and she was kind of, sort of worried.

The sex was still good - really good. If she was being honest, she couldn't get enough of it. But, she had suddenly realized that she always, _always_ , no matter how they started, ended up on her back. Missionary position was boring, right? She'd heard enough crass comments in school to know that boys tended to scoff at it. It was _vanilla_ and vanilla was bad for some reason.

Marinette wasn't vanilla! Just because she _enjoyed_ missionary position didn't mean she was boring! She had only lost her virginity about two weeks ago, for heaven's sake. They couldn't expect her to be an expert already. Unless, she should be? She was pretty sure she had been having more sex than the regular eighteen year old. At the very least, she should have tried something different by now.

But probably not something from the Kama Sutra!

 _This is porn!_ She cringed inwardly. It was a newer edition, and the book wasn't elegant photos of ancient carvings like she had once seen in her history book. They were photos of live models, performing each position step by step in horrifying HD quality. _This is just straight-up porn!_

She threw the book into the bottom of her bottom drawer and kicked it shut, before jumping up to pace around her room.

She was probably overthinking things, as she usually did. As long as Chat didn't complain, what did it matter what the meatheads in her school thought? A part of her believed that it was something about that wildness in him; some deep, instinctual need to claim and mark and dominate. She should probably be glad he didn't insist on taking her from behind all the time. Except . . . _No! Wait! Don't think about that!_

Her knees became weak as the image flashed through her mind. That was too much! She couldn't do that, no matter how much her stomach quivered in anticipation at the very idea.

. . . Unless he asked.

But, for the time being, she probably shouldn't mention to him that she was flexible enough to pull off most of the positions in that filthy book.

* * *

"Hey, Mari," Alya whispered from across the table they were sharing in the library. She had been paying more attention to her friend than to the piles of textbooks spread across the table. "You would tell me if you _did_ have sex, right?"

Marinette startled and automatically tugged her collar up. Alya's eyes zeroed in on the movement. Well, that was unnecessarily suspicious. She had taken Lila's advice to heart and made sure that any and all markings were located in places that could not be seen unless she wore a plunging neckline. It was only her own guilty conscience that caused the movement.

"Yeah, of course. Why?"

"I don't know, there's just times you act in a certain way. I know what a girl who just had good sex acts like, and sometimes I can see you acting in the same way."

Well, at least she didn't claim she could read it on her skin.

"I know it's none of my business, and you don't have to tell me about it if you don't want to, but I thought at the very least we could be honest with each other."

It would have been less painful if Alya had stabbed a knife through her heart.

She reached over to clasp the brunette's hand. "Alya, I _trust_ you. And I wouldn't willingly lie to you about just anything. I promise, the only reason I would keep something like that from you was if I was sleeping with Ladybug or something."

It was half a joke and half the truth. As close to a confession as she could get, but it did little to dull the guilt.

Alya snorted, "Girl, if you were sleeping with Ladybug you'd better give me _all_ the details. You know she's my girl-crush."

Marinette blushed, wondering what it was about a spotted, red suit that kept making her friends fall for her without really falling for _her._ "Isn't it kind of weird to say things like that when you have Nino?"

"Hey, I love Nino, but I'm not blind! And I know for a fact he'd be down for a ménage a trois with the bug. Or Chat Noir."

Marinette choked on her spit. _Way_ more information than she needed to know about her friends.

Alya laughed loudly, risking the wrath of the librarian. "I don't know what I was thinking. Look at how you blush, you are _such_ a virgin!"

"Don't say it like an insult!"

"It's not, it's not, I swear! I think it's good to wait for the right person, I just happened to find mine earlier than most."

Marinette felt something akin to jealousy for a moment, which wasn't that rare. Alya and Nino had been together for close to four years now, and they showed no signs of splitting up any time soon. Most teenagers believed that all their ephemeral relationships were the strongest and truest of loves until they moved on to their next crush, but what Alya and Nino had was more than that. It was natural and effortless. They fit together like puzzle pieces, different but complementary. It was a forever kind of love.

Who wouldn't be jealous of that?

How could Marinette not yearn for that when she had lived off the scraps of Adrien's attention for the past four years?

How could she not occasionally doubt her arrangement with Chat when she was surrounded by such pure, healthy relationships? Alya and Nino's perfect fit, Ivan and Myléne's sweetness, and, of course, her parents being as close to soulmates as mere mortals could get.

She wanted that, even now. Even as she slowly let go of the idea of ever having Adrien.

There were more people in the world. She could find somebody. She wasn't horrible.

But what was it Ladybug had said to Chat? Half a relationship wasn't worth it. As long as she was Ladybug, she would have to keep half her life a secret from anybody she was with. Could she honestly marry somebody and have children, knowing that she would constantly be stressing about keeping Tikki and the miraculous a secret from the person she was meant to be closest to?

She was giving herself a headache. What happened to living life to the fullest right now? She _liked_ what she had right now. She was _happy_ when she was with Chat, even though it was always a short-lived happiness. She didn't _love_ it, but she didn't need love right now.

Happy was enough. Like was enough. It _was_.

* * *

Friday Night Movie Marathons had changed in nature. There was a movie playing, sure, but neither of them was paying any attention to it. They had tried to watch it, honest, they had even left all the lights on to make sure he couldn't release his transformation. It just didn't take very long to realize there were things they could do while he was still transformed.

Marinette had been dying to watch _Roman Holiday_ for years, so she would be angry she missed it in the morning. But right now, the sight of Chat's head between her thighs was far more enthralling than any black and white movie.

"You taste so good, Mari," his voice came out in a husky whisper and she almost came right then and there. The worst part was that he wasn't even trying to be sexy. He said whatever came to his mind as it came to him, and somehow made the most innocuous comments sound like the filthiest of dirty talk.

Or maybe that was just her brain. Her brain wasn't in the best of shape. All she could think was, _Oh good, all that pineapple was good for something,_ before her back arched off her chair as his nose brushed against her clit.

It had been an accidental move, but upon noticing her reaction, he latched onto it with his mouth and she had to bite down on her fist to keep from crying out. It was still relatively early and she was worried her parents might be awake enough to hear. They didn't usually start until they were sure her parents would be in deep REM sleep, but one thing had led to another.

 _Eager kitty._

His claws lightly brushed the inside of her thighs, the feather-light touch driving her further to the edge. It really wasn't fair that he was so good at this when he was as new to it as she was.

She reached down to run her fingers through his hair. On a whim, she stroked one of his leather cat ears and he _purred_ while still firmly suckling her. Her mind went blank with pleasure and a cry built up in her throat when something bumped into her trapdoor.

Her mother's voice barely made it through the blood rushing in her ears. "Marinette, did you lock the trapdoor?"

The ground opened up from under her. Chat finally released her but froze, more frightened than she had ever seen him when facing akumas. Freezing seemed like a good idea. Maybe if she didn't move, her maman wouldn't be able to see her.

"Marinette?"

Okay, no, that wasn't working. "Of course not!" Her voice came out a scratchy mess and she cleared her throat. "Must have gotten jammed somehow!" She pushed Chat over in her haste to pull up her pants.

"Do you want me to get your papa?"

"No!" Sure, shrieking like a banshee wasn't suspicious. "I can - I can do it. I know all the - all the tricks."

She yanked Chat to his feet and pushed him towards the bed. With exaggerated hand movements, she silently ordered him to get under it. She slowly made her way to the trapdoor, wishing that she wasn't still leaking under her pajama pants, that her clitoris wasn't still engorged and her every step didn't feel like the sweetest torture.

She forced herself to breathe deeply, to calm the rapid beating of heart, and prayed she didn't look like she had been a second away from total bliss only to have it ripped from her. She reached for the rarely used lock and quietly undid it.

Her parents had always respected her privacy, only popping in when they thought something interesting was happening. Spoiler alert: there never was. So she never felt it particularly necessary to keep her trapdoor locked; if it was closed, it would stay closed unless she invited them in. Until now that there was something interesting finally happening in her room.

She made a big show of pulling the trapdoor open and smiled nervously at her mother. Sabine Cheng was not a particularly menacing woman. She was small and slim, a motherly aura surrounded her and she always had a kind word to give. Until it wasn't time to be nice. Then she was fiercesome. Then people learned that she was the one to be feared, not her giantesque husband.

Sabine quirked an eyebrow at her daughter's strange behavior, but didn't seem to notice anything amiss as she climbed into the room.

"I'll be out of your hair soon, I just needed to get some fresh aloe."

"From my garden?" Her garden on her balcony? The one she would have to pass by the bed to get to?

"Yes, Marinette. Where else would I get it?" Her maman stared at her as if she worried for her sanity. She probably should.

Sabine climbed up to the balcony, not even sparing the bed a glance. Marinette breathed a sigh of relief as she climbed up after her. Halfway through this disaster already. She could do this!

The older woman was already in the process of cutting off an aloe leaf, humming softly to herself. "You know, this garden has really flourished these past four years. You should be proud of yourself."

"I am," she said, her voice still a little strained. She coughed, "It's really helped me with stress."

Sabine sighed, "I remember what lycée was like. Make sure to take some time to enjoy life. Do something just for fun every once in a while.

A borderline hysterical laugh escaped Marinette, her mother's eyes popping open in concern. She coughed again, "I am. I mean, I do have fun. With friends and stuff."

Eyes that had seen too much to be fooled narrowed in her direction. She smiled nervously. A moment passed and then Sabine shrugged, making her way back into the room. Marinette had just allowed herself to breathe a sigh in relief when her mother's shocked voice reached her.

"Oh my gosh!"

Oh no. Oh, no, no, no! That idiot better not have tried to get out from under the bed before her mother even left the room!

She jumped into her room, prepared to give a million excuses as to why a masked superhero would be in her room that did not in any way include sex, when she realized Chat was nowhere to be found.

Her mother wasn't staring at Paris' cat-themed defender with shock and suspicion, she was looking at the computer screen with fondness. "I love this movie! I didn't know you had it."

"It's a rental," she answered, trying to keep the tears choked back. She was going to go gray, she was sure of it.

"You get your good taste from me, you know," Sabine informed her as she climbed down to the home proper. "And thanks for the aloe! Have a nice night, sweetie."

"Good night, Maman."

Her heart was still pounding wildly. She wasn't sure she could handle another scare like that. That was somehow more nerve-wracking than facing an akuma, the threat more visceral and long-lasting. No Lucky Charm to turn herself back to Madame Cheng's baby girl if she got caught. It was. . . exciting.

"Is it safe to come out now?" Chat's voice was barely a whisper.

More hysterical laughter escaped her, and she ran a hand through her hair. "Yeah, she's gone."

There must be something wrong with her. She must be twisted somehow. This couldn't be a normal reaction, could it?

She was still laughing when Chat approached her. "I can leave if you don't feel comfortable."

Oh, so now _he_ was going to treat her like a crazy person, too? He was the one doing this to her! She stopped laughing and turned to him with a fire in her eyes. She gripped his suit and pulled him down into a harsh kiss. He gasped in surprise and she slipped her tongue into his mouth like he had so often done to her. His eyes were wide in shock when she pulled away.

"You're not leaving. You're going to finish what you started."

"Okay," he meekly agreed, still surprised by the turn of events.

Of course, he must have expected her to be humiliated. To want to be alone to wallow in the darkness and shame of almost getting caught by her beloved mother.

But she didn't want that. The minute her mother closed the trapdoor, her fear had turned to adrenaline. It was _thrilling._ She got away with something. She never got to get away with anything!

She felt like she could do anything right now.

Marinette pushed him backwards to the bed, letting him fall onto his back as she turned off the lights. She didn't have night vision, and so had to feel for him in the dark, but even that made it better. She ran her hands over his body as she led herself by touch to straddle him.

She grabbed at his suit again, "Off. Now."

She felt him nod hurriedly, "Plagg, claws in." She felt herself smirk, he must really be turned on if he didn't even bother trying to hide his kwami's name.

The leather turned to cotton within her fists. "These too."

In no time at all, they were both naked and she was lowering herself onto him. She bit back a gasp as a whole new range of angles was opened to her. By the time he was fully within her, she was trembling.

When she started rocking back and forth, she couldn't imagine why she had taken so long to try this.

* * *

"I didn't hurt you, did I?" Marinette asked in a whisper, running her fingertips over his chest.

"What do you mean?"

She could feel bumps on his skin beneath her flesh. "I think I scratched you pretty hard."

"Oh," he said eloquently. "No, that - that was okay. It felt good."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah. All of that was . . . really good."

She felt herself blush. Now that she was in a calmer state of mind, she was surprised at herself. Not ashamed, because, as he said, it was really good, but she hadn't ever thought she was capable of ordering Chat Noir around in bed. Raking her nails down his chest as she climaxed was as much a surprise to her as it was to him.

"I think there's a little bit of a kitten in you, Purr-incess," he whispered against her lips.

She couldn't even be annoyed about the pun.

* * *

 **A/N:** Adrenaline's a hell of a drug!

The main conflict is ever so slowly revealing itself. It's more of an internal conflict, so it won't be as easy as fighting off an akuma. Although, there will _also_ be akumas involved in this story. It'll make sense eventually.

 **Fun story** , I don't have a Kama Sutra book, but I know somebody that does, and I almost _died_ trying to sneak a peek for authenticity, and it turned out it's NOTHING like Hollywood would have you believe! I almost died for nothing! But, it _does_ in fact have pictures in horrifying HD quality.

This chapter's title comes from the song **Bang, Bang by Ariana Grande, Nicki Minaj, and Jessie J** , the full lyric is "You see, anybody can be bad to you, you need a good girl to blow your mind."

As always, tell me what you liked, didn't like, and thought could use improvement.

~ Destiny's Sweet Melody


	5. I'll Fight For You Like I Was Your

**A/N:** Oh look, it's the sunshine child!

I always die laughing at the juxtaposition of Tikki being wise and reasonable and doing her best to make Marinette as responsible as could be expected of a fourteen year old girl. Meanwhile Plagg is just like, "Do what you want, Adrien, live a little, YOLO!" So, here's some more of that.

 **A small warning** for this chapter: the menstrual cycle is referenced, there's nothing graphic, but I know some people get squicked out by it, so there you go.

* * *

 **All Your Love Is Revenge**

 **Ch. 5: I'll Fight For You Like I Was Your Soldier**

Adrien was screwed. Even worse, he was damned. There was a repeated refrain in his head that told him that this couldn't possibly end well, but he couldn't make himself listen to it.

Plagg was no help, only nonchalantly eating his cheese while stating, "It's not like you're the first miraculous holder to get down and dirty. You're human, _be_ human."

 _Not helpful, Plagg._

It wasn't the sex that he minded. Contrary to popular belief, he was neither prudish nor guileless. He knew about sex, he had _wanted_ sex for a pretty long time. He didn't think it was shameful or sinful. It just felt. . . manipulative to be with Marinette as Chat Noir and then pretend she was just his friend as Adrien.

Not that she was his girlfriend.

 _Shut up, Plagg._

She wasn't; they had solid boundaries set up and he wasn't about to cross them. She wasn't his girlfriend, but she was his something, and it had been borderline painful to watch her be torn down by Chloé's mean words and Kim's stupid comments to the point that she had fled the classroom. He had wanted to yell, he had wanted to punch Kim, he had wanted to turn into Chat Noir and chase after her. But he couldn't. He couldn't explain to the class why he was being so territorial, and he couldn't explain to Marinette how Chat just happened to know she was in trouble.

It was a delicate thing; knowing that he was her sexual partner when she didn't.

He was pretty sure it also bordered on criminal.

Secret identities really complicated this whole consent thing. Chat Noir had Marinette's whole and enthusiastic consent, but would Adrien? Would she be so eager to sleep with him if she knew he was just Adrien, the friend that she _still_ didn't seem to enjoy being alone with?

Marinette genuinely cared about Chat. She called him her closest friend, and he was sure he saw sides of her that nobody else saw. On the other hand, she seemed to be reluctant friends with Adrien. Although she had stopped most of her stuttering, and could keep a conversation with him when the situation called for it, she seemed to avoid being left alone with him at all costs. She probably only started hanging out with him because Nino and Alya were dating and seemed to enjoy dragging their best friends along to things he'd expect them to want to go alone to.

He was sure that if she ever found out Chat was actually Adrien, she would never want to speak to him again. Which would be a shame because he genuinely cared about Marinette. She's his friend, she accepted both sides of him, and she was kind and brave and beautiful and. . .

Okay, he _may_ have had a teeny, tiny, mostly negligible crush on her since, well, forever.

Maybe he had been intrigued by the fierce, pretty girl that had fearlessly yelled at him, uncaring of his status as Gabriel Agreste's son.

Maybe if he had met her first, he could have fallen in love with her. But it didn't matter, because he hadn't. He had met Ladybug first and had fallen fast and hard and truly. He loved Ladybug, and Marinette loved somebody else. They were together simply because they could be.

It didn't _mean_ anything, no matter what Plagg said. The kwami had been teasing him about Marinette since day one; it was white noise by now. The more time Chat spent with her, the worse the teasing got. Especially when it became apparent that Marinette had no qualms about ordering him around as gently and unthinkingly as if he were a house pet. And after last Friday, Plagg kept telling him he had a femdom kink, and he didn't even know what that was! But he had googled it, and - after blushing for thirty minutes straight - had gotten curious and kept browsing. It seemed too intense for him to ever practice it, but -

 _You win this round, Plagg._

It's not like he wanted to trick Marinette. There were times he thought Chat Noir was more the real him than _he_ was. He wasn't pretending to be somebody else to get into her pants. He had been trying to be her _friend_. He had spent more time with her than anybody else, even his own father, in the past three years. It had felt almost natural to add sex when they did.

He wasn't trying to be manipulative. He would tell her who he was if he could, and if she decided she didn't want to see him again, he would respect her decision. But he couldn't, because it wasn't just about him and her. It was about Hawk Moth and akumas and Ladybug and the other miraculous holders. It was about the fate of the _entire world!_

He couldn't risk all of that just because he felt guilty. He couldn't risk _Marinette_ just because he felt guilty.

And no matter how loudly and how often his mind screamed at him that this was all a horrible idea, he couldn't stop himself from going back to her.

He was doing the best he could given the situation.

That didn't mean he wasn't still damned.

* * *

Marinette wasn't in class and he couldn't help but worry. Marinette was usually late, but she almost never missed class. In the four years that he had known her, he was sure she had missed around seven times total. The last time she missed was because she had contracted a flu so strong she threw up for three days straight and was delirious. What if she was that sick _again?_

"You saw her last night and she was fine, calm down," Plagg snarked quietly from his pocket.

That was true. It had only been ten hours and forty-three minutes since the last time he saw her. She couldn't have gotten _that_ sick in a matter of hours, could she? And, if she had, wouldn't he have gotten just as sick, given their closeness?

Wait. What if she got _hurt?_ What if she fell down the stairs or tripped and hit her head or had gotten hit by a car? What if she was in the hospital right now? What if -

"Ah, finally, she answers!" Alya cried victoriously, her phone raised in the air as they sat in a little bistro for lunch.

"Is she okay?" he asked quickly. That wasn't weird. He was known for being caring and concerned for his friends. Nino often teased that he was the Mom Friend of their group.

Alya quirked an eyebrow but brought her phone down to eye level to read the text, absentmindedly stirring her smoothie with one hand. "Looks like she's sick."

Her phone chirped again as another text came in. "Oh," she said simply after reading. She put her phone down next to her plate and cleared her throat. "Nothing serious, she should be in tomorrow."

That seemed like a lie. Alya considered herself a champion of the truth, and for the most part Adrien believed her, but there was something about her resolute focus on her food that made him think she was lying. Could Marinette have told her she was really sick but asked her not to worry anybody else about it? That sounded like something Marinette might do, and Alya would support even her craziest ideas. A little white lie like that would be nothing.

Alya's phone chirped again and it wasn't that he was _trying_ to read her texts. They were sitting at a circular table, and she had place her phone to her right, which placed it right next to his elbow. It's not his fault he was a fast enough reader to catch Marinette's message before she grabbed her phone.

 _It hurts!_ Followed by three crying emojis.

That's it; he was seeing her tonight.

* * *

He was earlier than he usually was, slipping away as soon as he could after the sun set and having bribed Plagg with three times his weight in camembert. Marinette was usually aware enough to hear exactly when he landed and open the skylight for him before he could even knock. On the rare times he did have to knock, she was there practically instantly.

He'd had to knock _three_ times before she finally opened, making his anxiety rise. It only skyrocketed when he got a good look at her. She was pale, her eyes pinched in pain, sweat across her brow. When she stepped down the stairs and went back to bed, she did so with halting, limping steps.

 _This is not nothing!_

"Sorry, Kitty, we can't have fun tonight," she said after burrowing under her covers, pulling them to her chin.

"That's not why I'm here!" He cried before realizing he shouldn't know she was sick until right this moment. "I mean, that's not a problem. But what happened to you? How are you so sick? You were fine last night!"

"Keep your voice down," she complained. "And last night doesn't matter, it's always very sudden."

"Always? You mean this has happened before?"

"Not like this," she admitted before suddenly tensing. Her face scrunched up in pain, and he could hear her whimper before whatever it was seemed to pass. "It's those damned birth control pills. They warned me the first few months might be worse than usual."

Wait. "Birth control pills?" He didn't even know she was on the pill. But he supposed that was wise, considering that there were more than a few times they were so in the moment he forgot to use a condom. There had to be a smart one in their non-relationship, and it obviously wasn't him.

"First few months?"

Did that mean that this was. . .

"Are you menstruating?"

Marinette's face turned cherry red, and she glared at him. "Don't say it like that! Nobody says it like that!"

"But it's your menstrual cycle."

"Just say period!"

It seemed like a weird thing to be embarrassed about, considering that he was intimately familiar with her reproductive organs. If she was going to be shy about something, it should be about him eating her out, not going through a perfectly natural cycle that millions of other humans also went through.

Strangely enough, the opposite seemed to be true. Maybe it was because he was a boy, and boys were supposed to think periods were gross. Adrien had been homeschooled most of his life, so he was taught about the human reproductive system in a clinical and impersonal manner. There also weren't any classmates to make jokes about how unappealing women were on the inside. There had to be _some_ benefits to his childhood, after all.

He didn't get what the big deal was, but he supposed he should abide by her will to put her at ease.

"I guess I'll just stick to your terminology, _period._ "

On most days, Marinette allowed him his penchant for punning. Sometimes, she would roll her eyes, a smile tugging at her lips. Sometimes, she would bury her face in her hands and ignore him. On the best of days, she laughed out loud as if it were the funniest thing she had ever heard.

This was not most days.

"Get out."

* * *

Exactly forty-seven minutes after Marinette had kicked him out, Chat Noir knocked on her skylight again. It took five tries this time, and he got the feeling that it wasn't so much pain as it was stubbornness that kept her from opening. The glare she gave him when she finally opened and the way that she blocked his way by staying on the stairs sort of confirmed that theory.

He cleared his throat, kneeling so that he was eye level with her, "Princess, please forgive my earlier behavior. You're the only girl I've ever been close enough to that I would know when they were men- on their period."

She seemed to soften at his words. "Alright, you're forgiven."

He grinned widely at her words and a small smile appeared on her pale face. "Would you like to come in?"

"Actually," he rose to his full height and gestured behind him with a flourish. "I am here to invite you out."

Marinette gasped softly at the set up he had managed to get together on such short notice. A checkered picnic basket, and two gray faux fur throws were set up in the center of her balcony. He had placed a lantern on her lawn chair, low enough to not attract attention from the street, and a thermos filled with hot chocolate was on the floor beside it. The piece de resistance, however, he had hidden out of sight.

"Will you join me?" He held out his hand, inordinately nervous.

It was just her balcony. They used to hang out on her balcony all the time. His palms were still sweating under the gloves of his suit despite that.

Pink appeared on her cheeks, making her seem just the smallest bit healthier, and she nodded mutely, reaching for his hand.

He helped her up to the top step and then scooped her up into his arms, helping her over to the blanket, despite it being only three steps away, making her giggle.

"Silly kitty."

"Only for you," the words escaped without his volition and were annoyingly honest.

He shook his head and left her to cover herself with one of the throws while he brought out his gifts.

"Ta-da!"

Marinette blinked owlishly. "Are those for me?"

"That's what the ta-da means."

"Is that another joke?" She glared as she pointed to the basket of multi-colored flowers, a big sign reading _get well soon_ in the dead center.

He laughed nervously, "It's all they had available."

Lie. He had gone out of his way to find a proper flower shop after buying all the other pieces, but he'd done it as Adrien Agreste. He figured Adrien doing some late night shopping was less suspicious that Chat Noir doing so, even if it was a weird assortment of shopping items. It wasn't until he was inside the store that he realized it would probably be noteworthy if he was seen buying roses, or anything else romantically inclined.

Chat Noir or Adrien Agreste, if a bystander took a picture of that by tomorrow it would be in all the gossip magazines that he had a mystery lover. And if Marinette recognized the flowers as the ones in her possession . . .

A get well gift was perfectly mundane, though.

"Oh, then that's fine," she decided and made grabby hands.

Chat snickered, sitting down next to her and passing both the flower basket and the box of chocolates. "I read that chocolate can help alleviate period pain because it contains magnesium."

Marinette smiled sweetly until she looked at the box he had given her. Then she seemed to choke on air. "Chat, these are really expensive!"

Were they? He had been eating them all his life. "It's not that big of a deal."

"I can't accept these, you have to take them back."

She shoved them towards his chest. He looked at her earnest face, and then at the box. Then, without hesitation, he passed a claw over the box and broke the seal.

"Can't take it back now."

"Chat!" Marinette shrieked, looking scandalized.

He grinned toothily, "Those are expensive, you can't let them go to waste."

She harrumphed and glared a moment more, but pulled the box back to herself and opened it. Scooting closer to him, she placed her head on his shoulder while taking a bite of the delicacies. She hummed in delight.

"You have to share some, at least."

Well, they were his favorites.

"Thank you for your generosity," he gingerly grabbed one with his claws, doing his best to ignore the pleased rumble in his chest that had started the moment her head touched his shoulder.

He wished sex hadn't complicated everything. He liked being like this with her, sitting closely together, watching the stars. It gave him a warm feeling that made him think of family, and home, and belonging. He belonged here with Marinette, watching over her and making her smile.

The real problem was that sex had only complicated things for him. Marinette didn't seem to sense anything different. To her, they were still the same as always, just with a fun added bonus. Any issues she had with their arrangement were due to all the lies she was forced to tell those she cared about the most. It wasn't because she felt like she was standing on a precipice, one misstep away from falling in love.

He reached over to offer her the hot chocolate and she practically mewled in delight when she placed the thermos to her lips.

"Thanks for all this, Chat."

He did his best to shrug nonchalantly, a hand rubbing the back of his head. "It was the least I could do. You _are_ kind of taking those pills because of me."

Marinette smirked impishly and twisted away from him, "Oh, you're right. No more chocolate for you."

He gave an exaggerated gasp, "No, not the chocolate! Anything but that!"

She threw her head back and laughed loudly. It was that laugh that made it seem like the sun was shining and made him feel like he had achieved a great victory.

That precipice suddenly felt like a gaping pit.

* * *

When he opened his eyes, there was sunlight streaming in. It took him a moment to realize he was in Marinette's bed and said girl was sleeping peacefully across from him. He vaguely remembered watching the stars and sharing chocolates - after she _graciously_ decided he could share again - until she was nothing more than a dead weight against his side.

He remembered picking her up and tucking her into bed. He remembered placing a kiss on her forehead and wishing he could join her, just to enjoy her warmth.

And then. . .

He didn't actually get into bed with her, did he?

The proof was right in front of him, but he didn't think he could actually be so foolish. He didn't think he could be so dumb as to forget to close the shutters and then _oversleep!_ Was he even still transformed?

He tensed when Marinette began to stir. He waited for her to wake, to get a good look at him and scream or hit him or something. But none of that happened. He _must_ still be transformed, because when she opened her eyes, she only smiled sleepily. His shoulders relaxed as the tension bled out of them.

She leaned towards him, obviously intent on a kiss, and his eyes closed in response. He felt her lips brush against his as she sighed, _"Adrien."_

His eyes snapped open and he jackknifed in bed, his heart beating furiously, and a thousand apologies on his tongue. Then the haze cleared. He was in his room. He was alone. There was no Marinette, she didn't know his secret identity, and she most certainly did not want to kiss Adrien Agreste.

He should be happy his secret was safe.

So why did it feel like his heart was being squeezed by a bear trap?

Adrien sighed; he was so screwed.

* * *

 **A/N:** Trying to think like Adrien was hard and I never want to do it again. I'm going to have to, but I shan't enjoy it.

This chapter's title is a (purposeful) miswrite of a lyric from **All the Right Moves by OneRepublic** , the full line is "I'll be the King of Hearts, you be the Queen of Spades/ And we'll fight for you like we were soldiers."

As always, tell me what you liked, didn't like, and what you thought could use improvement!

~Destiny's Sweet Melody


	6. Can You Feel It On Me, Love?

**A/N:** The only thing more awkward than The Talk is having The Other Talk with your folks.

 **To Crow:** Thank you for reviewing! I'm glad you like the story, and I update every Wednesday!

* * *

 **All Your Love Is Revenge**

 **Ch. 6: Can You Feel It On Me, Love?**

Marinette was having a good day. Her period was over, she had woken up to more luxurious chocolates on her balcony, as there had been for the past four days, and she had gotten top marks on her science lab report.

She felt as if she were walking on air.

Which was why she felt the sudden shift in the air the moment she stepped into her apartment. She faltered in her step before she even realized what was off.

"Marinette," her maman's voice was worryingly calm. "Please have a seat."

Her parents were both waiting for her at the kitchen table. Loud alarm bells began ringing in her head. The bakery should still be open. They should be watching over their beloved business, the baby they had before Marinette, their firstborn, as her papa fondly called it. The last time they closed early was because one of Sabine's relatives was deathly ill. Something was very, very wrong.

Marinette slowly walked to the table and took a seat across from them. They only stared silently. "Is - is everything okay?"

Her dad suddenly looked like he wanted to burst into tears, but her mom only narrowed her eyes. "Is there something you would like to tell us?"

Tell them? She was doing well in classes, she was still doing a good job as class president, and she was even getting along with Chloé these days! Or at least as well as she'd ever be able to. The point was, there was nothing that she could think of that would displease her parents. Especially not to the point that her papa would give her that kicked puppy look.

"I don't think so."

Sabine's left eyebrow arched impressively as her lips pulled into a tight frown. "You know, Marinette, I am a woman too."

"Um, yes, Maman." Was she supposed to agree with an obvious statement?

Sabine glared. That was a no, then.

"That means I understand how a woman's body works," she continued icily, and somewhere in the back of Marinette's mind a voice was screaming at her to run. "I was a bit surprised at how much pain you were in this month, but didn't think much of it because sometimes it happens. That is, until I picked up the phone today. Somebody was calling for you, since you had put the home phone as your secondary number and you weren't picking up your cell phone because, presumably, you were in class."

The voices in her head were screaming so loud she couldn't think who she would have given her home phone to.

Sabine picked at a loose thread in her sleeve, "Then I went to your room. And I found something very interesting. Something I didn't expect to find in my daughter's room."

Oh, please, _please_ not the Kama Sutra book! Why did she ever buy that book?

"Do you want to guess who called, Marinette, or should I tell you?"

If she opened her mouth, she would throw up, she was sure. Was she trembling? Probably.

Her mother decided that was her cue to answer. She passed something across the table. "It was your gynecologist's office."

The world froze as she saw the little blue case that was lying on the kitchen table in front of her. She stared at it until blue consumed her vision. Not even her parents existed in that instant.

"They wanted to remind you that you needed to refill your prescription soon."

Was it really going to be a month already? It didn't feel like a month. It felt like no time had passed at all. Actually, at right that moment, it felt like time wasn't real, nothing was real, not even her! She was going to turn into dust and fly away with the wind. _Please_ let her turn into dust and fly away with the wind!

"Did we never make you feel like you could trust us?" Her maman's voice sounded unaccountably sad at the word trust and Marinette snapped back into the moment. Her parents didn't actually look angry, they seemed. . . disappointed, and even worse, heartbroken.

"Of course I do!" she insisted earnestly.

"Then why wouldn't you trust us enough to tell us you were sexually active?" her papa finally spoke.

"I do," she insisted, wringing her hands together. How could she explain the problem? How could she explain she had lost her virginity to a superhero when they didn't even know they were friends? How could she tell them in a way that wouldn't lead to them inviting Chat over, treating him like family, adding themselves to the list of people that could be hurt to get to him?

She couldn't. She couldn't risk them. She knew her parents, and they would want to get involved no matter the risks. It was the reason why she didn't tell them she was Ladybug, not even when she was at her lowest and just wanted her parents to hug her and say everything would be alright.

She swallowed heavily, prepared to add more lies to her life. "I would tell you, I _will._ I'm not sexually active yet."

"Then why the pills?" Sabine demanded, obviously not convinced. Maybe being a woman meant she could tell when another woman lied about such things.

"Alya told me about them, that they can help regulate your periods and even help with acne." That part was true. She was taking the same brand Alya was because her best friend had told her all about the benefits. "And I was just. . . thinking that I'll be graduating soon, and maybe - maybe somebody would romance me because it's their last chance! Or maybe even during university! I'll be in contact with thousands of new people, maybe some- something will happen there, and I just wanted to be prepared. You told me I should be prepared! I just. . . I was just embarrassed because it sounds so stupid and childish to say it out loud."

Her face burned and her stomach clenched. She hated lying to her parents, even for their own good.

"Do you promise?" her papa asked, voice weak but filled with hope.

How many times could it feel like her heart was being stabbed before it finally gave out?

"I promise."

Her parents aimed small, careful smiles at her and Sabine reached over to clasp her hands. "I'm sorry, I was just worried. I should have known you'd be responsible."

Marinette did her best to smile and excused herself to her room, taking the case of pills with her. She still felt like she was going to throw up, and ice shards seemed to be piercing her heart. She moved without thought, her feet leading her to her desk where she put the case in the top drawer. She was glad she had never felt the need to hide them, that her mother had found them so quickly and hadn't continued to snoop, and she hadn't needed to have a whole other type of conversation that she wouldn't be able to lie her way out of.

She made her way to her balcony, taking a deep breath of fresh air to calm her nerves.

"Marinette," Tikki used the same tone her maman had. "Do you see how much trouble your _arrangement_ with Chat is causing? You saw how upset your parents were. If they find out you lied to them it'll be worse!"

"They won't," she insisted quietly.

"But what if they do?"

"They won't! For the same reason they never figured out I'm Ladybug. Who could believe plain, clumsy Marinette could have anything to do with the miraculous?"

She felt Tikki hug her cheek the way the kwami always did whenever she was particularly morose. "Marinette, you know that's not true. They haven't figured out you're Ladybug because you're clever enough to not get caught, and because the magic of the miraculous gently suggests to their subconscious to ignore any similarities."

Marinette felt herself smile at the supportive words, until Tikki pulled away and continued speaking. "But you're not thinking with your mind when you're with Chat. One of you is going to slip up and then everyone will be in danger. You, your parents, Chat, even the other miraculous holders!"

Her hands clenched into fists, suddenly defensive of her non-relationship. "You know I try to listen to you about everything," she began firmly. "But not this. You can't take this from me." She had given _everything_ to being Ladybug. A part of her felt like she was owed something, some little bit of happiness, and now she had it. "It's not going to last forever, Tikki. Just let it run its course."

Tikki frowned at Marinette but nodded. "I hope you know what you're doing."

So did Marinette.

* * *

Alya had decided that it had been far too long since they had all hung out together, so she invited Marinette, Nino, and Adrien to a little artisan fair/farmer's market that would be popping up over the weekend. Of course, since she made these plans in class, she was overheard and Kim loudly announced that he would be joining them and, of course, Max would be joining him. Since Alya wasn't quick enough to reject him, Alix took that to mean it was an open invitation and agreed that she would be there too. Then Rose and Juleka had asked what time they should be there.

By the time the day they were meant to hang out rolled around, it was practically a class trip!

Marinette didn't really mind. Alya was right, it had been far too long since they had just hung out as friends. Everybody was as busy as she was trying to put their school lives in order so that they wouldn't land on their faces come graduation. Add to that the fact that she wasn't really eager to leave her room most nights on the off chance that Chat might drop by, and it had been weeks since Marinette had spent time with _Alya!_

She felt a little bit guilty about that. Alya had always found time for Marinette, even after she and Nino became serious - to the point that Nino occasionally joked that Marinette was trying to steal his girlfriend - but Marinette couldn't offer her the same. And she wasn't even in a relationship! Of course, her arrangement was a bit more complicated than a school romance, and it came with the catch that she couldn't offer an explanation to Alya as to why she kept cancelling their plans. Alya could spend nights with her best friend because she could spend the entire weekend with her boyfriend, but Marinette only had nights.

All in all, she was glad to be spending time with Alya and about half her classmates. She knew that much too soon they would be consumed with university courses, internships, and then the rest of their lives! She knew that most of them would stop talking to each other outside of the occasional birthday message on social media. Marinette couldn't claim to be close to all her classmates, but they had been a part of her life for so long that she knew she would miss them.

"Look at you, girl, being a rebel," Alya teased from where they were sitting in the grass eating some fried food. Everybody else had gotten fried pineapple rings, but Marinette had gotten fried dumplings. She was honestly sick of pineapples, even though she was still stubbornly eating them on a daily basis.

"I've been eating a lot of pineapple recently," she explained thoughtlessly, momentarily forgetting whose company she was in. She heard Kim snicker and immediately went on the defensive. "I heard it's good for your skin!"

She really need to come up with a better excuse.

"That's not the only thing it's good for," Kim crowed.

"Kim, I swear to God," Nino began, but didn't even need to finish his threat before Alix smacked Kim upside the head with a pointed glare. Marinette had never found out how that fight that broke out after she left the classroom turned out - no one wanted to rehash it - but it was clear that lines had been drawn, sides had been taken, and feelings had been hurt.

She only felt a little guilty about that, considering the fight wouldn't have even started if everybody had just minded their own business.

"I don't understand," Adrien's voice added to her mortification. "What else is it good for?"

She wanted to die! He really _was_ too innocent for his own good.

Kim grinned like a shark, even as Alix raised her fist, and Marinette suddenly shot to her feet. "I'm done! I'm gonna go look around." She took off running before anybody could offer to go with her.

She wandered around aimlessly, accepting free samples and window shopping, until she came across a stall containing brass bracelets. She used to love those as a kid! She smiled at the vendor and made small talk, asking for the price and such, while looking at the variety in color and patterns.

Joyously, the vendor had no problems with her trying them on, and she was on her third option, a gold and green bracelet with green paw prints circling the band, when she saw a black shadow in the mirror set up in the stall. _Huh, that almost looked like -_

Her eyes snapped back to the mirror in a panic. Yep, that was _definitely_ Chat Noir hiding behind a tree and smiling at her through the mirror. She gulped, hoping that her sudden change in demeanor didn't draw the vendor's attention. When he saw her making eye contact with him, Chat pointed down and then made a thumbs up. It took her panicking mind a minute to realize he was telling her he approved of the bracelet.

She huffed and glared at him before turning to the vendor, keeping Chat's reflection in the corner of her eye. "This one's pretty, but I think the red one looks better on me."

She snickered meanly when she saw Chat frantically shake his head.

Then she turned her body so that he couldn't see her or the vendor as she leaned in and whispered that she had decided to take the green one after all. Her body blocked the view as he wrapped it up in a paper package, which she quickly placed in her bag.

Marinette smiled smugly at the pouting Chat in the mirror before continuing on her way, in a much better mood than she had been moments earlier.

Her good mood lasted about thirty seconds, when she came across Juleka being harrassed by the most dudebro of dudebros that she had ever had the displeasure of seeing. Marinette felt her hackles rise. Juleka was always being harassed by such men. She was pretty, tall and slender, and had grown to be comfortable in her body, adding a little lolita flair to her gothic wardrobe.

Juleka turned heads wherever she went, but she never seemed to reciprocate the interest. Of course, that set off the least evolved of men. And Juleka, for all that she had learned to love herself, had never learned how to stand up for herself, merely staying quiet until they got bored and went away.

That didn't sit well with Marinette, who had spent years doing much the same.

"Juleka," she called, making sure the taller girl was aware of her presence before she grabbed onto her arm. "Are you okay?"

The boy, slightly taller than Juleka and with twice as much muscle as Kim, glared at the intrusion. Then he grinned meanly, "Oh, is that what it is? This your little girlfriend?"

Marinette bared her teeth, angered on behalf of her shy friend. She detested the men with weak egos who questioned Juleka's sexuality just because she was uninterested and had a toned dancer's body.

"Yes, I am," she said impetuously before tugging Juleka down so she could kiss her cheek. The purple-haired girl startled but didn't say anything to reveal Marinette's lie. "So you can go now, you're not woman enough for anybody here!"

The boy huffed an angry breath through his nose, but turned and stomped away.

Marinette was still too angry, body coiled for a fight, to breathe a sigh of relief. Instead, she pulled Juleka in the other direction. "Where are the others?"

"We sort of spread around after we finished eating," Juleka answered in a quiet voice. "Thanks, by the way. You didn't have to do that."

"Of course I did, we're dating now, remember?" she joked and Juleka flushed. Marinette wondered at her single status. "Do you mind if I ask you something?"

"You want to know if I really am gay?" Juleka guessed in a tone that indicated this was a conversation she'd had more times than she wanted to.

"You don't have to tell me anything! I know better than anyone how messy invasions of privacy are."

"Yeah, you do," Juleka smiled. "Well, since you're genuinely curious instead of just being nosey, I guess I can tell you. To be honest. . . I don't know. In collége, I thought I was in love with Rose because I was my best self with her. But then I'd see a boy that could take my breath away. And, sometimes, I think I might be asexual, because even though I can find boys _and_ girls attractive, I've never actually _needed_ to be with anyone. So, I guess, right now I'm just questioning."

Huh, Marinette had never known anybody that identified as questioning. Alya had been loud and proud about her bisexuality since forever, and Nino had quietly admitted he considered himself pan despite having only had serious crushes on girls. She was pretty sure Adrien was straight just like her, but she'd never had the courage to talk to him about human sexuality.

"Lucky you, never needing anyone," Marinette joked to dispel the serious mood.

Juleka smirked, "Better than your single target sexuality."

Marinette spluttered, her face burning, causing Juleka to giggle. "Oh, that's it! I'm _so_ breaking up with you!"

Juleka laughed loudly, but was interrupted by a large blast. Four years of akuma attacks had done much to desensitize the people of Paris to their presence. To their credit, there weren't any screams of terror or mindless trampling down anybody that got in the way of their escape.

Of course, that had just made it even harder for Marinette to find a private moment to transform. Juleka had kept a strong grip on her hand when she pulled away, telling her not to panic and leading her away from the sounds of attack. It was nice to be cared for, really it was, but it only made her panic rise even more. How was she going to get away to save the day?

Marinette was so absorbed in finding a way to get closer to the akuma, that she didn't realize the akuma itself was getting closer to her until suddenly there was a strangely familiar purple-skinned man with muscles the size of her torso standing in front of her.

"I am the Strongman, and I won't be ridiculed by a little girl."

Oh boy.

"Juleka?"

"Yeah?"

"Panic now."

They took off running, and Marinette was touched at the fact her friend refused to let go of her hand even though she was the target. The fact that it made them seem like even more of a couple probably only made Strongman angrier.

"Marinette! Juleka! Over here!" Alya called them over to a nearby alleyway, and they had just turned to her direction when a black figure landed behind them. Marinette stopped so suddenly that she slipped from Juleka's grasp.

"Marinette!" Juleka stumbled to a stop.

"Just run!" The taller girl looked conflicted, but seeing Chat Noir there seemed to give her the confidence to leave the smaller girl behind and jog the rest of the way to where Alya, Nino, and Rose were hiding out.

"You should run too," Chat calmly informed her at the same time Strongman yelled that nobody would keep him from her. Chat smirked, "Akuma bait."

"Oh, hush," her hand lifted to smack his shoulder before freezing in the air, realizing that it was a too friendly gesture for a random bystander. Especially in front of her friends. _Especially_ in front of Alya, who probably had her phone's camera trained on them. "This time was totally not my fault."

"That's what they all say."

He didn't let her defend herself before launching himself at the akuma, baton twirling. Chat was fast enough to get in ten hits before Strongman could even swing his arm, but Strongman was, well, _strong._ He didn't seem to even notice he was being hit, and once he got a lucky hit in, Chat went flying into a nearby wall hard enough that a crack appeared. And Marinette didn't think.

She didn't think about how much danger she was putting herself in. She didn't think about how she wasn't Ladybug at the moment. She didn't think about her friends watching, and the thousands more watching on the Ladyblog. She thought about Chat, and that was enough.

The rock that hit Strongman on the back of his head was as big as Marinette's fist, but it felt like a mosquito bite to him. Negligible, but he suddenly became aware of her presence, and he suddenly remembered what it was he wanted, no matter what the voice in his head was hissing. He turned to face her, purple face filled with rage.

"You know what?" she began, knowing full well this was a fight she couldn't win. "You're still not woman enough."

Strongman roared loudly before charging at her like a bull, and slow as he was she knew she wouldn't be able to outrun him for long. She stayed right where she was, preparing to jump out of the way at the last moment, when suddenly arms wrapped around her waist and she felt herself be lifted to the sky. She looked down as they moved in an arc and saw Alya's shocked face, camera still recording, before the buildings obscured her vision and they landed in another alley.

Chat placed her on her feet quite gently before harshly pushing her back with a hard grip on her shoulders. He glared at her, which she felt was uncalled for considering she had just kept him from being stomped on.

"What were you thinking?" he demanded angrily.

"I was thinking I could help!"

"I don't need your help, I'm the superhero!"

Marinette had to bite her tongue to keep from revealing that she was a superhero too!

She was so angry! She had been _worried_ about him and this was how he reacted! She had half a mind to tell him that she hoped he got stomped on by the akuma for being so ungrateful, but she couldn't bring herself to say it even in her head. He was her friend, her partner, and now her something else. She couldn't ever wish him ill, no matter how angry he made her.

"You were about to be killed!" she said instead. She hadn't meant to sound like she was about to cry.

The angry lines of his body instantly softened and he pulled her into a hug, "So were you." He rubbed his cheek against the top of her head, and she found it strangely soothing. "I don't want anything to happen to you. Just let me handle it."

Marinette pouted against his chest. It wasn't his fault he didn't know she was a superhero, she supposed. "Fine." She sounded petulant and she didn't care!

Chat pulled back to smile at her, "Thanks, Princess." He placed a quick kiss onto her lips before leaping back into battle. She did her best to ignore the fluttering in her chest before calling on Tikki.

Marinette had promised to let him handle it. Ladybug had not.

* * *

Marinette had spent so long in the shower, using half the shampoo bottle and most of her brand new body wash, her parents had knocked on the door in worry. When the now customary knock on her skylight came she had half a mind to not open. The stupid cat had scent marked her!

She had never spent much time wondering how the miraculous magic worked, even on other miraculous holders. It was always enough to just be assured that the only way somebody would discover her identity was if she transformed right in front of them or she told them herself. It was certainly a curious thing that Chat, who probably knew the shape of her body and curves of her face even better than she did by now, didn't seem to recognize her when wearing skintight spandex.

And then the idiot had sniffed at her.

"You smell weird," he'd said after the akuma was defeated and they shared their customary fist bump. And then, when she had exclaimed her displeasure at his words, he had continued, "I mean, not _weird_ , just different. Kind of familiar. More than usual, I mean."

She had fled as quickly as she could, worried that it had something to do with their having sex, even though he had already seen Ladybug since they started sleeping together and hadn't mentioned anything. It was Tikki who had mentioned what he was probably smelling was himself, and that nice, calming nuzzling thing that she had liked so much was actually him _marking his territory!_

The nerve!

Marinette glared as she made her way up to the balcony. Chat seemed surprised that she was coming up instead of letting him down, but didn't mention it. He made no mention of her glare or crossed arms either.

Instead, he leaned towards her and _sniffed._ Marinette panicked, fear filling her. Did he figure out what the mystery scent on Ladybug was? Did he make the connection between scent marking Marinette and then having Ladybug arrive smelling like him? Did he know who she was? Did he -

"You smell like cotton candy."

Marinette's brain short-circuited and she heard herself laugh hysterically, "New body wash."

"It smells nice," he was sniffing at her neck and she found her body temperature rising despite herself.

"Thank you!" Was she still laughing hysterically? Yes, yes she was.

Maybe Tikki was right, maybe this was all too much. She wasn't sure her sanity was going to make it to the end of whatever it was going on between them. _Maybe,_ just maybe, she should take some time to step back and really question what it was she wanted from this arrangement, and if it was really worth all the risks. Maybe she needed to decide whether all the stress and danger was -

He was doing that nuzzling thing again. Marinette stopped thinking.

* * *

 **A/N:** I have WAY too much fun messing with Marinette lol. I also cheated on the akuma battle by just skipping over it, but this chapter was getting a bit too long for my tastes.

 **The entire bit with Juleka** came from the fact that I couldn't decide her orientation in this fic. I dislike that she's always been the fandom's go-to lesbian just because she's not stereotypically feminine, but I'm also a huge hypocrite because I LOVE JulekaxRose, so much like Kim, endgame is up to you.

I hope the scene **with Marinette's parents** serves to better explain her reasoning as to why she keeps compulsively lying to everyone. It's not just her secret identity that she's worried about.

This chapter's title comes from **Strangeness & Charm by Florence + the Machine.** The full lyric is "Atom to atom, can you feel it on me, love?/ Pattern to pattern, can you see it on me, love?/ Atom to atom, what's the matter with me, love?" **If I had to choose a theme song for this fic, this would be it.** It fits their relationship so well, not just because the rhythm has such a frenetic energy, but even the lyrics fit perfectly! Please listen to it, if you haven't before, because everything Florence sings is magic!

As always, tell me what you liked, didn't like, and what you thought could use improvement.

~ Destiny's Sweet Melody


	7. The Moonlight Is So Beautiful

**A/N:** Some slightly angsty Adrienette, because of course!

* * *

 **All Your Love Is Revenge**

 **Ch. 7: The Moonlight Is So Beautiful**

Marinette had all but forgotten about the brass bracelet she had bought at the artisan fair. It was unimportant between the akuma attack and discovering that she had a _thing_ for being scent marked. Or at least a thing for being scent marked by Chat Noir. It was surprisingly non-sexual, even when he was nuzzling her breast.

The bracelet had come back to her conscious thought when she realized, quite suddenly, that on Saturday it would be a month since she started her arrangement with Chat. It felt like something she should take note of, even if celebrating would be weird. Friends with benefits don't have anniversaries, do they?

 _No, that's ridiculous!_ How would that even work? Thanks for having sex with me, here's a cake!

Marinette felt herself blush at how ridiculous she was being, but still insisted on doing _something_ , even if it was just for herself.

So, when she happened on the bracelet on Friday morning while getting ready for school, she slipped it on. She never actually planned on showing it to him, didn't want him to think that she bought it because he liked it on her.

But she could show it off in school. Everybody would assume it was Chat Noir inspired even though she wasn't sure if that was the artist's intention or if it was just a coincidence. She had been pegged as the biggest Chat Noir fangirl since she was the only one to jump to his defense whenever anybody, usually Chloé, called him useless or unnecessary. Not even Alya was so eager to defend him! But he was her partner as Ladybug, and as his friendship with Marinette grew, she only became more protective towards him.

She was pretty sure she would die if Chat ever heard how passionately she defended him at times. He would never stop teasing her!

Everyone would think she was just showing support for her favorite superhero. Only she would know the truth. She giggled to herself, feeling quite devious indeed.

The problem was that Marinette wasn't very devious. In fact, it could be argued that she was the exact opposite of devious.

Every time she received a compliment for her new piece of jewelry, she flushed fiercely because _what was she thinking?_ Even if everyone just thought it was an innocuous piece of jewelry, she knew that she was celebrating her sexiversary, and _who did that?_

The worst part was when for whatever reason Adrien turned to speak to her and noticed the bracelet. He seemed unusually quiet when he focused on it, whatever he was about to say all but forgotten, before he smiled brightly and told her it looked really pretty on her.

Marinette's flush was so powerful she was sure she would evaporate. And the worst part was that she couldn't even fully enjoy it! On the one hand, _Adrien Agreste_ just called her pretty. Well, technically he called the bracelet pretty, but it was close enough! On the other hand, _Adrien Agreste_ just called the bracelet she's wearing in honor of having sex with another man pretty.

Oh, why couldn't she just fall off the face of the planet?

The best she could do was just stutter a thanks and goodbye, and then make a quick escape, not even bothering to learn what it was he had approached her for. It had been a long time since she had acted that way around him. She liked to think they were actually good friends by now, and now she was acting like she was fourteen years old again!

 _Ugh, what was I thinking?_

She supposed it was just as well. She had slept with Chat because she had admitted, once and for all, that her love for Adrien was hopeless. It didn't really matter if she acted like a spaz around him because she wasn't trying to impress him. Not actively. If, for whatever reason, he decided she was the prettiest, most amazing person in the world and asked her to date him, she wouldn't say no.

Okay, she wasn't actually over him. She doubted she ever would be. He would always be her what could have been, even if the _could_ , was more like, what could have been in a one in one thousand chance. What could have been in an alternate universe where she was more than plain, clumsy Marinette. What could have been if she was more like Ladybug in her civilian life.

What had no chance whatsoever of ever happening.

Fine, she said it! She knew that there was very little chance of Adrien ever seeing her as more than a friend. He was a model, he was surrounded by the world's most beautiful girls and women all the time. What chance did she have to catch his attention? Deep down, she always knew that all her dreams would forever remain just dreams.

Once, Alya had asked her if it was possible she had fallen in love with Adrien because she wanted someone that she couldn't ever reach. "Maybe he's just the safe option. You'd never have to deal with the hardships of a real relationship."

Tears had filled Marinette's eyes, and she had defended her feelings as real and pure through hiccupping breaths, and Alya had apologized and hugged her and asked for forgiveness.

But. . . the truth was, she could understand where Alya was coming from. With the exception of a few harebrained schemes - most of which were actually thought up by Alya, not her - she hadn't really done anything to catch Adrien's attention. She thought that being a true friend would be enough to make him appreciate her enough to consider dating her, but maybe she should have tried harder. She could have been more aggressive in her pursuit, been more forward in her advances.

Chloé certainly was. Not that it was working for her either.

 _Love is stupid,_ she reminded herself. She had decided that love and romance were not what she needed at the moment. If there was one thing that could be said about Marinette, it was that once she decided on something, she would stick to it.

* * *

"Say, Princess, you never showed me that bracelet you bought. The _red_ one?"

Marinette narrowed her eyes at his too smug grin. It was almost like he knew something he shouldn't. She had been quick to take the bracelet off and hide it in her bottom drawer before he arrived for movie night. Unless he snooped while she was in the bathroom, he shouldn't be aware that she had bought the green one.

But no, if he had snooped in that drawer, he would be teasing her about the Kama Sutra book instead. She paled at the thought, that thing was dangerous.

"I haven't really worn it. I sort of forgot about it after the akuma attacked," she avoided the obvious request in his tone.

"So, you haven't worn it at all?"

Her eyes narrowed again. He knew something, _somehow._ She had tried to not think too much about who he was beneath the mask, but over the years she had gotten the very strong feeling he went to school with her. If he did, then that meant he knew for a fact that she had worn it, _and_ that it was the one he had chosen.

"I wore it today," she bit out.

"Oh?" He made a show of looking at her wrists, "But you're not wearing it right now?"

"I don't usually wear jewelry to bed." Except for her earrings, but she had learned to not draw attention to her earrings.

"But you so _loudly_ insisted the red suited you so much, I thought you'd want to show it off."

Marinette glared. Chat grinned. "You know, don't you?"

He was trying so hard to hold back the laughter that she could see tears in his eyes, "I have no idea what you mean! I'm just trying to be a supportive friend."

"Lies."

He devolved into a fit of giggles so strong he fell over. "I _am_ a supportive friend!" he insisted, fluttering his too long eyelashes at her. It really was unfair that Marinette was surrounded by such handsome men she couldn't be in a loving relationship with.

She poked his nose, "I've been babysitting Manon and her baby doll eyes since she was five. Your kitten eyes do _nothing!_ "

"Me-owch! I'll have you know, that _everybody_ loves my kitten eyes." He fluttered his lashes rapidly and she snorted, a smile tugging at her lips despite herself.

"Oh fine," she got up with a sigh and grabbed the bracelet. She tossed it to him and asserted, "It has nothing to do with you."

He easily caught it and turned it in his palm, taking in each and every detail. "Of course, the obviously Chat Noir inspired bracelet that I suggested for you has nothing at all to do with me."

Marinette glared some more at his Cheshire grin. "I'm just teasing," he reached over for her arm and slipped the bracelet on. "It looks really pretty on you."

She felt herself flush at the honest, almost hesitant way he said it.

"Would it be weird to ask you to keep it on tonight?"

 _And he ruined it!_ She had to look away as her blush deepened even further. "Fine."

Was it a weird request? Probably. But. . . she was kind of into it. She still couldn't look at him though.

"Oh yeah, one more thing! What are you doing tomorrow?"

"Just homework, I guess."

"Great! I'll come see you then."

She looked at him strangely, a brow raised in incredulity. Was he really so insatiable? "We haven't even gotten through tonight."

"Wait, no," he startled, and she was sure she could see the beginnings of a blush at the edges of his mask. "That's not what I meant!"

She quietly waited for him to continue. "Do - do you really not know what tomorrow is?"

His cat ears twitched nervously. Marinette was confused. She couldn't think of anything going on tomorrow. It wasn't a holiday, there weren't any fairs or festivals, and there wasn't a Jagged Stone concert. "Um, it's Saturday?" He couldn't possibly mean. . .

His tail flicked almost angrily to one side, but his voice was still careful. "I- it's a month. It'll be a month since we started _this_ ," he gestured between them. "It's our anniversary."

Marinette's heart was racing and she wasn't sure why. "Oh I - I remembered. I just - I thought anniversaries weren't a thing for our. . . _thing._ "

Sometimes, she thought, labels were a good thing. It felt strangely cold to refer to their arrangement as a thing. They had been friends first, and they were friends still. They'd be friends after, too, she was sure. She couldn't imagine a future without Chat Noir coming to visit her for movie marathons.

"Besides, it's just a month," she continued when she realized her heartbeat wasn't slowing down. "Aren't monthiversaries kind of corny?"

"Monthiversaries are sweet!" he hissed at her. "Besides, we don't know how long this is going to continue. We might not even make it to our one year anniversary. Might as well celebrate while we can."

She did her best to ignore the way her heart tightened at the flippant way he referred to their non-existent future.

"What did you have in mind?"

* * *

He refused to tell her. He assured her that she was going to like it, but it needed to be a surprise because, "Everybody loves a surprise!"

Marinette hated surprises. A surprise had led to the possibly lifelong commitment of fighting akumas and lying to everyone she knows and loves. It had also given her Tikki, and it gave her Chat, so surprises weren't all bad.

But surprises had also led to her grandmamma being akumatized. And to Marinette tripping over her own feet and knocking over an important order of two hundred cupcakes. And to Alya being hospitalized for two days when she got too close to an akuma battle. And to Nino almost drowning during a class trip to the beach. And to Marinette somehow becoming akuma bait.

Surprises were not the best thing in her life, is all she's saying.

It's not that she was afraid Chat was going to put her in danger or willfully embarrass her. She was just sure that she would somehow mess it up!

Alya was always going on and on about positive thinking and setting herself up to fail, and maybe she was right, but the facts speak for themselves. Unless she was wearing miraculous armor, she was not the best when it came to situations she went into without any information.

So maybe she had spent the entire day pacing around in her room and not doing much else. She couldn't even bring herself to text Alya, because there was no way she could keep up a normal conversation without breaking and fretfully texting _what sort of surprise should you expect from your not-boyfriend for your one month anniversary of sleeping together?_

She was sure Alya would know exactly what answer to give. And _then_ she would rush right over to get every detail and refuse to leave until Marinette gave her the answers she sought.

 _Can't have that happening,_ she sighed tiredly. She wasn't entirely sure she could lie straight to Alya's face. The only reason she had gotten away with so much for so long was because Alya was never actually looking for a specific answer, so she could just awkwardly deflect her questions. If she admitted she was sleeping with someone, it would probably take Alya less than an hour to get her to admit that it was Chat Noir.

Pacing it was!

It was almost midnight when she finally heard knocking from her skylight. She wrung her hands nervously before taking a deep breath and climbing the stairs. She half expected another picnic set up on her balcony, but there was nothing. Chat wasn't holding any gift bags or flowers either. She narrowed her eyes suspiciously as she stepped fully onto the balcony.

"Oh, you're wearing your pajamas already?" He sounded disappointed.

Marinette angrily sucked on her teeth, "What else would I be wearing? It's almost midnight!" He had never complained before!

Chat seemed to sense her displeasure and nervously ran his hand through his hair. "Well, you can't really go out like that."

Now that _was_ a surprise. "Out? Like _out_ -out?"

Like a _date?_

"Not in public, obviously. But there's somewhere I want to take you."

Okay, maybe she was curious about this surprise now. "I can change, I guess."

"Just make sure to wear a jacket," he made a shooing motion.

Marinette nearly tripped down the steps in her haste to change, slipping on a pair of jeans and a t-shirt. She had a moment of hesitation as she wondered if she should dress a little more elegantly, put a little more effort into her outfit.

 _No,_ she reminded herself, _it's not a date._

They don't date. They were friends with benefits, and friends don't put effort into taking a friend's breath away with their outfit. She grabbed a jacket that was hanging off her desk chair and hurried up to the balcony.

"So, where to?"

Chat grinned, "You really don't get the concept of a surprise, do you?"

She crossed her arms, "Maybe I don't like to be caught unawares."

He smirked at her, "Just get on my back and hold on. Don't you trust me?"

It was a rhetorical question. Obviously, it was! But as she wrapped her arms around his neck, she couldn't stop herself from answering, "Of course I do."

On his back like this, she could feel him purr in appreciation with her own body, and immediately remonstrated herself for how much she liked it. Chat was going to ruin other men for her if this kept up. Where else was she going to find a man that liked nuzzling and could purr with his entire body like an actual cat?

He leapt off her roof without a word of warning. It wasn't the first time she had flown across the rooftops of Paris, of course. It wasn't even the first time she had done so on Chat's back. But there was something about this moment, of the anticipation caused by whatever it was he had planned, that made it more exciting, that made her hold him a bit tighter and hide her face in the back of his neck.

Wherever they were going was further than anywhere else he had taken her, and it was quite a while before he said, "Close your eyes, please!"

By that point the buildings and housing had given way to trees, and she thought it was the place her parents had taken her camping once that year she was going through her Dora the Exploradora phase. Just before she closed her eyes, she thought she saw lights in the distance, but she was quick to comply with his request.

It wasn't until he had landed and placed her on her feet that he asked her to open her eyes, and then. . .

"Wow," she breathed.

 _This is not a date,_ she reminded herself. It was just what dreams were made of. The clearing itself was simple enough, a basic circle big enough to fit a car, a few tents, and maybe a picnic table. Yet, it had been transformed into a wonderland by a few details. There were lanterns with battery powered candles hanging on the trees framing the clearing, something that looked like pearlescent streamers twining through the branches, a white lace blanket that looked too fine to ever make contact with the dirt was at the very center, pots of flowers holding it in place. The pots themselves were filled pink and orange roses, pink carnations entwined with white clovers, daisies and gardenias. There was a wicker picnic basket and even a portable ice box.

It obviously took effort. It probably took quite a bit of money as well. It was too much!

She swallowed heavily, "If this is what you do for one month, I may have to keep you around until after our one year anniversary just to see what you do."

"I accept the challenge, Princess," Chat grinned, and it felt like her heart hadn't stopped pounding since yesterday.

She was going to faint, and then she was going to die from the embarrassment of fainting. She was _swooning!_ Why was she swooning?

It was just Chat being his usual overdramatic self! But. . . it was also the closest thing to a date she had ever had, not counting the Evillustrator. Nobody really counted the Evillustrator. It was sort of her first date, and it was _perfect!_

She jumped towards Chat, wrapping her arms around him and obviously catching him by surprise. "Thank you, thank you, thank you! This is so beautiful."

She felt him huff out a laugh and then lean down to rub his cheek against the top of her head. "Glad you like it."

"Like it?" she looked up at him, accidentally brushing their noses together and mentally noting the way that caused Chat's breath to hitch. She smiled brightly, "I love it."

"I -" he began and then cleared his throat. He moved his head so that his forehead was pressed against hers. "It was no problem, really."

Marinette could see the moonlight catching the strands of his wild hair. There wasn't much moonlight, to be honest, the moon nothing more than a small sliver that would disappear in a day or two. She felt her hand move to trace over his cheekbones as she allowed herself to wonder for a moment what would happen if she asked him to turn off all the lanterns and drop his transformation.

Would it be so dark that he would be little more than a shadow? Or would there be _just enough_ moonlight that she'd see all the little details his mask and the miraculous magic hid?

It seemed like a stupid gamble to make, but at that very moment she couldn't quite remember why it was so important that she never see his face. If there was anybody that could be trusted to take a secret identity to the grave, it was her.

Chat leaned into her hand so that his cheek rested on her palm. Something like anticipation fluttered in her stomach, and she decided that he probably wouldn't reject her request if she made it.

 _Only one way to find out._ She leaned up onto her tiptoes and kissed him like her life depended on it.

* * *

 **A/N:** Adrien is 1000% the type of person that would celebrate every month of a relationship in the cheesiest way imaginable. And even if she's "just a friend", dammit nothing and nobody's going to stop him from celebrating his monthiversary!

No secretly dating fic is complete without **the language of flowers!** Pink roses mean grace, happiness, and gentleness, while orange roses mean desire and enthusiasm. Pink carnations mean "I'll never forget you" while white clovers mean "think of me." Daisies mean innocence and hope, while gardenias mean secret love. Did I look for the corniest flower meanings? Yes, yes I did, thank you for noticing.

This chapter's title is (translated) from **Fox Rain by Lee Sun Hee** , which is a lovely ballad but is about (presumed) unrequited love. Spoiler alert: it's not unrequited. The full lyric is, more or less, "The moonlight is so beautiful, I just can't get away/ Let me lie down by your side for a moment, a moment, just a moment."

As always, let me know what you liked, didn't like, and what you thought could use improvement!

~ Destiny's Sweet Melody


	8. So In Synch (Just Like Twins)

**A/N:** What's the point of sleeping with a superhero if you can't occasionally cosplay as them? Also, some LadyNoir!

 **To KwibKwib:** Thanks so much for reviewing! I'm glad you like the fic so far, and I hope you continue to like it!

* * *

 **All Your Love Is Revenge**

 **Ch. 8: So In Synch (Just Like Twins)**

Tikki hadn't spoken to her for an entire day. She was barely speaking to Marinette _now._ Tikki was currently preferring to communicate in admonishments and displeased looks, because not only had she left Tikki behind during her not-a-date with Chat, but she actually _had_ managed to get him to release his transformation beneath the moonlight. Fortunately, or perhaps, in the darkest recesses of her mind, unfortunately, he was little more than a shadow to her eyes. She had thought, once her eyes had adjusted to the darkness a bit more, that she could see the slightest hint of his features, but it wasn't clear enough that she could convince herself it wasn't just her imagination.

However, playing Russian Roulette with Chat's secret identity wasn't even the worst offense in Tikki's eyes.

"Public indecency is a crime, Marinette!"

"It was hardly public," Marinette argued. "It was totally isolated!"

Probably.

Marinette wasn't really paying attention to Tikki anyway. She had been stuck in some sort of euphoric haze, even better than the one she was in after the first time they had sex. It was a weird kind of half-dreaming state in which, if left to her own devices long enough, she would find herself replaying their "anniversary" night over and over in her mind.

She had been wrong about Chat having some sort of domination kink. He seemed to enjoy it when she was on top, even though she didn't feel particularly confident in that position yet. But when he dropped his transformation he had pulled her onto his lap and nibbled on her earlobe, and she had found herself rutting against him with almost reckless abandon.

 _No, bad brain! Don't think about that right now!_

She looked around the classroom, at the mingling students waiting for the bell to ring, and felt herself flush. No one was so much as looking at her, yet she still felt the need to bury her face in her arms.

She had been so vocal too! In her room, separated from her parents by only the floorboards, she had always been careful to keep everything but the smallest sighs from escaping her lips. In that clearing, it was almost as if she was making up for lost time.

And hearing Chat Noir growl out "Mari, Mari, Marinette" as he came was the hottest thing she had ever experienced.

 _No, no, no! That's even worse!_

She pressed her thighs together as heat pooled low in her gut. She really needed to get her hormones under control. She wasn't at the point that she needed to abscond to the bathroom for some alone time, but she was getting pretty close. She closed her eyes and threw her arms over her head.

 _Think about literally anything else!_

"Hey, Mari, Earth to Marinette," Alya poked her in the side and she practically levitated in her seat from the surprise.

Marinette smiled nervously. Alya stared.

"You okay, girl?"

"Yeah - yes, of course! Why wouldn't I be?"

Alya stared some more, "I've been talking to you - well, more like at you - for five minutes!"

"Oh really? Sorry about that," Marinette tapped a frantic rhythm against the desk with her fingernails. "What's up?"

"It's fine," Alya leaned back in her chair. "I just wanted to ask if you had my costume ready?"

"Oh yeah, actually I have it right here," Marinette pulled up a large canvas bag onto her desk. "I thought we could go to your house and I could make any final adjustments there."

"Why not at your place?"

Valid question. She always did adjustments in her room simply for the ease of access to her supplies. Going to Alya's house meant she would risk not having what she needed and wasting a day. But, at right this moment, her room was filled with bouquets of expensive flowers and a giant cat head shaped luxury chocolate bar, and there was really no way she could explain her way out of that one!

"My parents are working on a big order, and if I'm home they'll keep asking me for help. I'd rather get this done quickly at your house and then go home to help without any distractions."

That was kind of true at least. Her parents _did_ have a big order coming up, but they wouldn't start working on it until Thursday at the earliest. It was still Monday.

"Aww, that's sweet," Alya cooed, making Marinette feel just a little more guilt for using her parents that way. "I'm impressed you got it done so quick."

"Eh, well, I needed to get it done quickly so I could work on my costume," Marinette admitted, despite knowing that would only lead to more questions.

"You're making a costume!" Alya announced, and now. . . _now_ everybody was staring at her.

Honestly, they seemed like they didn't even know she could stitch! She supposed it was surprising, since she would always buy her own costumes despite lovingly making costumes for Alya for the past four years.

There wasn't any great reason behind it, really there wasn't. Since she was a child, the last Friday just before the two week break for All Saints was given to the students to dress up as if it were Halloween. The nicer teachers even gave out candies that were carefully chosen so no one in the classroom would have an allergic reaction. As a child, Marinette had adored the tradition, and when she learned to make her own clothes, she had painstakingly made costumes she could be proud of.

Then she became Ladybug, and Almost Halloween Day became Ladybug Appreciation Day. Nearly everyone in the entire school would take the opportunity to honor the superheroine, whether in full out cosplays - Like Chloé and Alya - or with something as simple as a ladybug-patterned hoodie - like Adrien usually wore.

Marinette _was_ Ladybug, she didn't want to dress up as Ladybug! She didn't really want to dress up as Chat Noir either, because that would only make her stick out even more, so she ended up going to the nearest costume shop and buying the most clichéd Halloween costumes she could get. So far she had been a pumpkin, a witch, and a Raggedy Ann doll.

But she had realized that this would probably be the last year she would get to dress up. Come graduation, she would have to be an _adult_ and adults don't get to do anything fun like have an Almost Halloween Day. She might as well go all out. This was the year for taking risks, wasn't it?

"Yes, I am," Marinette answered quietly, trying to keep attention off of her.

Alya, obviously not getting the memo, practically vibrated in her seat. "Are you doing Ladybug too? Ooh, maybe you could do Rena Rouge and we can team up! I mean, you can do Queen B, but everybody knows Rena's cooler."

Marinette was pretty sure she heard the very distinct sound of Chloé Bourgeois scoffing in displeasure but she ignored it. "No, I'm not doing any of those."

"Then what is it?"

"It's a surprise?" It came out more like a question than a statement, as if the bespectacled girl could give her the answer. Then, because she couldn't help herself, she added, "Everybody loves a surprise."

* * *

Marinette had to work at twice her usual pace to get her costume done in four days between classes, homework, and Chat Noir visits. Now that it was actually Almost Halloween Day, however, she was reluctant to enter her classroom. Her parents had gushed when they saw her, and insisted on taking a plethora of pictures, not even caring that she would be later than usual. Marinette was grateful for it.

It's not that she was ashamed of her costume. Despite getting it done in such a short amount of time, she felt confident that it was the best work she had done in a very long while. It was certainly the first passion project she had done in a long time. She had been so busy taking commissions to save up money for dorm life, and working on her portfolio for applications, that she hadn't done anything just because she wanted to.

Slowly, she was learning how to do things that she enjoyed, rather than just what she was responsible for.

That didn't mean she was ready to face the reactions from her class. She was getting tired of being the center of attention, even for the briefest of moments, but she knew that was exactly what she would get the moment she stepped through the door. Not only would she be wearing the first costume she sewed for herself for the first time in four years, but _what_ she was wearing was very unusual, despite the student body's superhero worship.

 _Well, here goes nothing,_ she forced herself to reach for the door after staring at it blankly for a full thirty seconds.

With a deep breath she stepped in. . . and immediately heard somebody start choking in the ensuing silence. Marinette did her best to not so much as look at anyone as she slowly made her way to her seat, chin held high, despite her face being cherry red.

"Oh my gosh," Alya squealed excitedly. "You're Chat Noir!"

Marinette had only managed to jerk her head once in confirmation before Alya wrapped her in a hug, "We match!"

Yes, they did. She also matched with at least half the people in the room, including Sabrina who was dressed as Queen B. Surprisingly, for the first time in four years, Adrien was not amongst the half offering tribute to Ladybug. Instead, he was wearing a simple tuxedo and top hat, obviously some sort of magician. Nino had gone the lazy route and placed a pair of bunny ears on top of his head while wearing his usual clothes.

"You _need_ to let me take pictures for the Ladyblog!" Alya continued, undeterred by Marinette's lack of enthusiasm.

Despite blushing, Marinette offered a murmured, "Okay."

She played with her gloved fingers beneath the table. Her costume wasn't nearly as complex as Chat Noir's outfit, but it was a close approximation. It was only the third time she had worked with leather, so she was quite proud that she had managed to add a zipper with a golden bell to the jacket and even the tail belt to her slightly too tight for decent society pants. She wasn't wearing a mask, but she did find a pair of passable kitten ears that she donned. She had actually found some contacts that could give her green sclera online, but they were far too expensive, so she dabbed some electric green eye shadow on instead.

It wasn't until she saw Nino reach over to smack Adrien on the back until he spat out a piece of gum that she realized he was the one that started choking when she walked in.

 _Ah, that's embarrassing._

"You've been holding out on me, girl," Alya smiled. "This outfit is fire -" she gestured at herself. This year, Alya had decided to change it up a little and tasked Marinette with coming up with a "future" Ladybug outfit. Instead of the usual unbroken pattern, she had added black tights that started at her thighs and faded into knee high ladybug patterned boots, as well as a little flair on her back that mimicked a ladybug's shell. "But _that_ one is amazing! It's so accurate too!"

"Pictures!" Marinette panicked, her arms waving crazily. "I studied the pictures on the Ladyblog!"

Alya's smile looked disturbingly shark-like, "Yeah, I bet you studied those pictures."

Wait, no. She wasn't suppose to think _that!_

"Leather," a weak voice interjected, and it took her a while to realize Adrien was staring right at her. "You're wearing leather."

Did he sound shocked? Scandalized? Weirded out? Probably weirded out.

"Well, yeah, it's _Chat Noir._ Kind of had to wear leather."

Adrien's mouth opened and closed like a peculiarly attractive fish, but he eventually said nothing and simply turned back to face the front of the classroom.

Definitely weirded out.

* * *

Marinette heaved a great sigh as she flopped down on her chaise lounge, having finally been able to escape Alya's impromptu photo shoot. She appreciated Alya's love for her designs, but she always felt awkward in front of a camera, and knowing that thousands, if not millions, followed the Ladyblog didn't make it any easier. But Alya insisted that the free publicity was the only way to ease her conscious for never paying Marinette for her services; even though Marinette would never think of charging her for them.

Honestly, the free publicity _worked._ She had barely taken twelve steps before she got a text from Alya saying that comments were pouring in asking where they could get the costume.

It was little surprise when she heard knocking coming from her skylight even though there was still plenty of light out.

Marinette huffed at Chat Noir's predictable nature when it came to certain things. Like teasing her whenever she showed the smallest bit of appreciation for his person.

With heavy steps, she climbed the steps and unlocked the hatch, and turned back down immediately. She heard him land with a gentle thump, but kept her back to him, face already turning crimson. She hadn't even had time to change before he arrived!

"Nice outfit, Purr-incess," she could _hear_ the smirk in his voice.

She spun on her heel, crossed her arms over her chest, and _glared_ with all the fury she could muster. The blush probably ruined the effect, if his goofy grin was any indication. She thought about the fact that he probably went to her school and had already seen her in it, and wondered what his initial reaction was. It really wasn't fair that he had time to prepare and plan out his interactions with her while she had to think on her toes.

"Thanks, I worked really hard on it," she forced out of gritted teeth.

"I'm honored," his voice took on a husky tone and she felt her heart speed up. He didn't help matters by closing the gap between them until there was little more than an inch or two of distance. Her hands spasmed, but she pursed her lips and forced her glare to remain. "Truly, I am."

Damn his sincerity! She uncrossed her arms and played with the tips of her hair, which was let loose for a change. When she spoke, her voice was little more than a whisper, "Good, I'm glad you approve."

Chat reached out to flick the golden bell at her throat with a claw. Her breath stuttered suddenly when he cupped her jaw, his eyes staring intensely into her own.

"Would it be weird if I said I wanted to kiss you right now?" he asked, a teasing lilt to his voice.

"A bit narcissistic, to be honest," she responded with a giggle.

"Hey! It's not my fault you look so cute in that outfit. You would have made a nice Chat Noir!"

"Not _purr_ -fect?" she teased and giggled even more at the affronted look on his face.

"Ah-ah, _I'm_ the purr-fect Chat Noir," he tapped her nose. "The Chat Noir Paris needs right now."

"But not the one it deserves?"

His eyes narrowed at her growing grin, "I should have never watched the Dark Knight Trilogy with you."

She burst into laughter as his frown grew, seemingly annoyed that he hadn't gotten to drop in and sweep her off her feet. Maybe she was better at thinking on her toes than he was at planning, after all. Deciding to take pity on him, she grabbed onto his bell and tugged him down so that the distance between their mouths was lessened. "You may, by the way."

When his mask quirked in the way that indicated he was raising an eyebrow she rolled her eyes. "Kiss me, I mean."

"Oh," he gasped out before smiling and leaning forward to capture her lips.

Marinette sighed into the kiss, something inside of her loosening at the contact. Okay, so maybe this was _exactly_ the sort of reaction she was hoping for. She wasn't entirely certain what had possessed her to dress up as Chat Noir. Maybe, much like the bracelet, she wanted to feel like she was telling the world that she was intimate with him. Maybe, despite all her assumptions, she was the one with the weird claiming kink.

It was important to her, even knowing that it had to remain a secret, that she was the one sleeping with Chat Noir.

Marinette Dupain-Cheng. Not Ladybug, not Rena Rouge, or Queen B. Not a superhero. Just Marinette: clumsy daughter of the best bakers in Paris and aspiring fashion designer.

It felt like, for once, she was enough.

Her hands trailed up his chest and gripped his shoulders tight, putting more force behind the kiss. He hummed appreciatively and settled his hands at her waist, his claws slowly teasing their way under her jacket. Marinette pushed into him, forcing him backwards, but they hadn't even gotten close to the bed when the explosion sounded.

Chat pulled away and looked towards her skylight. His hands clenched around her waist once before he slowly removed them with a sigh, "What a mood killer."

Marinette giggled as she followed him onto her balcony. "You're coming back, right?"

"Of course, Princess," he pecked her cheek quickly. "We're still on for movie night."

Marinette giggle-snorted, knowing that there had been very little movie viewing on recent Friday Night Movie Marathons, but only waved as he saluted her and jumped off the balcony.

"Tikki," she called cheerfully. The kwami was still angry at her about, well, everything, but she wasn't so angry she would let Marinette shirk her duties just to ignore her. "Spots on!"

* * *

Queen B was the first on the scene, which wasn't usual. Usually, Chat and Ladybug were the ones that dealt with akumas, unless they were particularly difficult, and _then_ the "auxiliary miraculous holders" showed up to offer their services. The only exceptions were when they just happened to be in the area when the akuma first showed up and neither Chat nor Ladybug had arrived.

It was only dumb luck that had led to Queen B distracting the twenty foot tall akuma by dancing around him and cheerfully calling him nonsense names until her seniors arrived.

Because they were together. . . distracted. . . and Ladybug had to wait a few minutes before following after Chat so that he didn't notice they were coming from the same direction.

Okay fine, Tikki voice, so there were _some_ flaws to the system. That didn't mean she should stop! Nothing was ever perfect.

The akuma, it turned out, was a four year old boy that had gotten angry when his babysitter had made fun of his dream of being a dinosaur when he grew up, which had only been made worse when said babysitter locked him in his room for throwing a temper tantrum.

Since the akuma was so young, it was easy enough to defeat it, as it lacked the ability to think things through at an advanced level. She didn't even need to use Lucky Charm. But, since the akuma was so young, it was an exceptionally violent akuma, not even thinking about how he may hurt himself with each attack.

Chat had used Cataclysm on the necklace around the dinosaur inspired akuma's neck and had barely made contact with the tip of a claw before it spun around and smacked him with its tail. Luckily, it was enough to release the purple butterfly for Ladybug to purify, but Chat had landed in the Seine.

Ladybug panicked when she remembered that Chat wasn't the best of swimmers. She wasn't sure if it was more of his cat-like tendencies, or if his civilian self had never bothered to learn, but she didn't hesitate to jump into the water after him.

Queen B called after her, and it wasn't until she had one arm wrapped around his torso and was dragging him to safety that she remembered she could have used her yo-yo to rescue him without risking herself. Okay, more than a few flaws. It didn't matter; she was going to rescue him regardless. Even if he didn't have a close friendship with Marinette.

When they reached solid ground, Chat fell to his knees coughing and dragged her down with him since her arm was still wrapped around him. She could feel him trembling as he wheezed in deep breaths, and her heart tightened at the thought that he had almost died at the hands of an akumatized four year old.

Without thinking, she turned her head so that it was tucked under his chin and mouthed his name against his skin. It wasn't until he stiffened beneath her that she realized she wasn't Marinette at the moment, she was _Ladybug_ and Ladybug didn't mouth his name against his skin. She pushed away from him and jumped to her feet.

"I just - that wasn't - I wasn't -" she stumbled over her words. She was glad her mask covered the top of her cheeks and concealed most of her blush, but she was sure her ears were red as well. "I should go! Take care of yourself!"

She whipped her yo-yo in whatever direction and took off. Her mind was racing so much that she didn't realize she was mindlessly swinging in circles around a five block radius for about twenty minutes. Shaking her head, she swung in the direction of the bakery, but made sure to drop her transformation a few blocks away just in case Chat beat her to her own balcony.

The moment she was back in her Chat Noir costume - and didn't _that_ look weird, Ladybug turning into Chat - her phone began buzzing with an endless stream of texts from Alya. Marinette groaned when she read the messages, already guessing what they must be about.

 _My OTP is becoming canon! :D_

Yep, that was it. Marinette cringed as she imagined her best friend dancing around her room in victory. She had probably already posted something on the Ladyblog alluding to it, if only because she would wait for irrefutable proof before confirming it, and she could already picture the comments.

 _LadyNoir FTW!_

Oh look, there was even a picture! There she was, cuddling into him, her head tucked under his chin, and from this angle it almost looked like she was kissing his neck. This was terrible; Tikki would never let her hear the end of it!

Marinette was mostly glad that Chat wasn't there when she finally made it to her room. She took her time preparing for the evening, making popcorn and looking for the perfect unromantic, mindlessly funny film for them to watch, then showering and changing to her fluffiest, least sexy pajamas. Perhaps it was time to bring movies back to their movie marathons.

The sun set and the moon rose and she was still waiting. Around midnight, she decided to start the movie herself and too bad if he hadn't watched it. Unless he pouted and gave her those kitten eyes, then she might be persuaded to start it over. But _only_ because it was so funny!

She was still waiting at three am when she fell asleep forty minutes into her second movie.

For the first time in three years, Chat Noir missed the Friday Night Movie Marathon. Marinette tried her best to not feel bitter about it.

* * *

 **A/N:** Is this the start of the Marinette fueled angst? Maybe so. I hope she doesn't come across as too selfish, she's a teenage girl that had her entire adolescence stolen from her by "great responsibility", so she's kind of going through her rebellious phase now. Besides, it's _just sex_ so she can't foresee anything really bad happening (Ha!).

I like to imagine Adrien is the type of person that takes a full two hours to psyche himself up to be all smooth and debonair and then messes it up anyway. He was also totally trying to be Tuxedo Kamen from _Sailor Moon_ but Plagg talked him out of the mask.

I have absolutely no idea what Queen B's powers are supposed to be, so I just had her distracting the akuma for a bit. I also see the miraculous versions of each person as their opposite/what they need for personal growth, so mean, bitchy Chloé would turn into caring and cheerful Queen B. **Chloé Bourgeois deserves a redemption arc** , fight me!

I know that Halloween isn't a thing in France, but my parents come from a country where they still think Halloween is the devil's birthday, and I know for a fact that there's at least _one_ town where they let the kids dress up in class and get candy. **Let's pretend the 21st Arrondissement is that place in Paris.**

This chapter's title comes from **Hot 'n' Cold by Katy Perry** which I think describes Marinette's feelings regarding Chat pretty well. The full line is "We used to be just like twins, so in synch."

As always, let me know what you liked, didn't like, and what could use improvement!

~ Destiny's Sweet Melody


	9. In The Future You Envision

**A/N:** There was a small spike in reviews last chapter, so I'm glad to see you all love drama as much as I do! I almost feel bad for resolving their first problem so easily, but don't worry, they're going to have some issues.

This chapter's one part angst, two parts fluff (and mild smut). Enjoy!

 **Thanks to everyone** who reviewed, and added this fic to their alerts and/or favorites!

* * *

 **All Your Love Is Revenge**

 **Ch. 9: In The Future You Envision**

Marinette grumbled at the air as she forced herself to research published theses on _The Highwayman._ She was going to get this stupid assignment done, damn it! If nothing else, the directionless rage she had woken up with served as fuel for her schoolwork. She had even turned her phone off, because if she had to read _one more text_ about how sure Alya was that Ladybug and Chat Noir were totally dating, she was going to call her best friend and burst her ear drums through the phone.

Ladybug wasn't dating Chat Noir because Chat Noir was with _Marinette!_

Wait, no. He wasn't _with_ Marinette, but he certainly wasn't with Ladybug. Because _she_ was Ladybug and she had shot him down enough times that he now considered it hopeless, and had chosen to be with Marinette.

Except not _with_ -with. But, with in the sense that they were sleeping together. With in the sense that he spent more time with her in a day than he spent with Ladybug in a month. With in the sense that if he _was_ going to choose to be with-with anyone, it should be _Marinette_ and not Ladybug who doesn't show him even half the appreciation he deserves, and hasn't ever properly thanked him for all the times he nearly died for her, and who honestly doesn't deserve him because she was. . .

. . . And, wait, she was technically Ladybug. Why was she being so critical of _herself?_

The point was that Chat Noir wasn't dating anybody, and it annoyed her that a single shoddy picture could convince thousands of people to the contrary. Nadja Chamack had done a report on it during the morning news, for heaven's sake! It was the same kind of mindless celebrity gossip that usually led to nothing and faded into oblivion in a matter of days, but now she was angry with the living room TV and had secluded herself in her room with nothing but her computer for company.

Marinette screamed her frustration aloud, glad that her parents were out of the apartment.

 _This was supposed to be a good weekend_ , she pouted.

Her parents had finally taken a well deserved vacation outside of the city, the first they had taken since Marinette was six. They had even gone so far as to close the bakery for the weekend. And since Marinette was now eighteen, and had proven herself unusually mature for her age, they had decided to treat it as a second honeymoon and left her alone.

She had been hoping she could convince Chat to stay overnight since there was no one to think it strange if she took breakfast up to her room. A part of her had been eager to see how loud he would be if there was no one to overhear. She had been planning to tell him last night, but he never showed up.

Now she wasn't sure if she would even let him in her room. _If_ he ever showed up. A part of her had given up on his visits already. If he thought, even for a single moment, that he had a shot with Ladybug he would almost certainly stop fooling around with Marinette. He was loyal to a fault, and if he thought his Lady returned his feelings, he wouldn't risk betraying her like that. Even without the sex, she thought they would just drop right back into their regular routine as friends.

Apparently, she was wrong. All it had taken was one moment of weakness, one moment where she forgot which lines she was allowed to cross at any given time, and he had dropped Marinette like she burned him. Maybe it was different for boys. Wasn't that what girls at school were always saying? Guys were only friends with girls for one thing, and once they got it they wouldn't be friends anymore.

She knew that was ridiculous; she was still friends with Nino, and Adrien, and Kim, and Max, and not a single one of them was disappointed she never put out. _Chat_ wouldn't do that to her. He was too sincere for that. Besides, was she supposed to believe he had watched stupid movies with her and braided her hair for three years on the off chance she would one day ask him for sex?

It was stupid. It was ridiculous. It. . . still hurt.

The very idea that he wouldn't want anything to do with her if they weren't having sex was enough to make her heart feel like it was stuck in a vise. Marinette drew her knees to her chest, and stared at the screen. Her lower lip began to tremble.

It wasn't fair! None of it meant anything! Not Marinette sleeping with him or Ladybug feeling concern for him. It wasn't supposed to mean anything. So then why. . .

"Marinette?" Tikki's voice was filled with concern instead of admonishment for once. When she didn't respond, the kwami placed a gentle hand over her cheek, right over the trail of tears she hadn't realized she was shedding. Marinette jolted back in surprise. "Are you okay?"

"I. . ." she wanted to say yes. Even if she was crying, she could still be okay. Sometimes, people just needed to cry. It wouldn't be the first time she randomly burst into tears since becoming Ladybug. Occasionally, all her different responsibilities just piled up until she felt like she couldn't breathe, and the only way to get better was to break something or cry.

But this was different. It didn't feel like one of those times. It felt like she was standing in the middle of valley, screaming at the top of her lungs, but no one was around to hear. It felt like her heart was trying to claw its way out of her chest, and she wasn't even sure why. Was she okay? "No."

"Oh, Marinette," Tikki sighed, but Marinette shook her head.

"Can you not talk right now?" She tried to keep her voice gentle even though the words were harsh, "I don't want a lecture."

"I wasn't going to -" the kwami began, but stopped at a sharp glare from Marinette. She sighed tiredly and floated away to the tiny mattress Marinette had sewed for her.

Marinette forced herself to focus on her work. At the very least, she thought morosely, there were thousands of papers done on the stupid poem. Much less were actually translated into French, and even fewer were originally done in French, but she thought she could work with them enough to get her first draft done. There were even a few that agreed that it was a sexist product of a sexist time.

 _There's nothing romantic about throwing away all the things your lover has done for you because of an impulse._

She was sorely tempted to make that her thesis statement, but she grit her teeth and forced herself to keep reading. That, she could admit, at least quietly to herself, was just her being bitter.

* * *

She turned her phone back on as she prepared dinner for herself. As she had guessed there were about thirty texts from Alya all about her OTP, along with three missed calls, followed by one final text that simply read: _Sorry I've been blowing up your phone all day, but you know I've been waiting FOUR YEARS for this lol._

Marinette sent a quick text back: _No problem, ignoring your LadyNoir rant gave me the strength to work on my lit project :p_

There was a missed call from Nino, as well as a text asking her if she was okay since she wasn't picking up her phone. Guessing he was with Alya, she sent a simple _'yep, a-ok.'_

Surprisingly, there was a text from _Adrien_. A noncommittal, _'Hey, how are you?'_ Then, thirty minutes later when she didn't respond: _Sorry, you're probably busy._

Marinette choked on a scream. She missed a text from Adrien! She missed an opportunity to have an actual conversation with Adrien! A conversation that _he_ tried to start! That's it, she deserved a scream!

"Marinette!" Tikki chided her, covering where her ears should be.

The designer started to defend her right to throw a tantrum - she missed talking to the _love of her life_ because she was angry at a stupid cat! - when a crash sounded from upstairs. Marinette froze, wondering if somebody had just broken into her room. For a moment, she wondered if it could be Chat, but he would never break in, he would always knock and patiently wait for her to open.

She hopped from foot to foot, wondering if she should run out the front door, or call the police, or even transform. "Tikki, what do I do?"

The kwami looked just as anxious as she did, obviously unused to her chosen being targeted by random thugs.

Before either of them could fully devolve into total panic, a familiar voice called out just as a black-clad figure landed in front of Marinette, "Princess!"

Marinette jumped more from feeling Tikki dive under the back of her shirt than from surprise.

"Ch- Chat Noir?" She wasn't entirely sure how she felt about having him in front of her. She had been so angry at him since the moment she woke up, but having him right in front of her was almost like a balm. All her anger simply disappeared.

He blinked at her, body tense as if prepared for a fight. "Are you okay? I heard you scream."

"I'm fine," she insisted, having been asked that question one too many times that day. There was only one thing she could focus on, "Did you break my window?"

Chat had the decency to look abashed, "Not the window."

"The skylight?" she growled out.

"Not the _whole_ skylight, just the lock."

"Chat!"

"I was worried!"

She wanted to be angry, really she did, but she had been angry all day and she was tired of it already. "It was nothing, I was just angry about a text."

"Oh," Chat said simply, the tension in his body disappearing almost instantaneously. "Do you want to talk about it?"

"Um," she wasn't sure why she couldn't make herself tell him. It wouldn't be the first time she complained about all her Adrien related problems to Chat, without using the name Adrien, of course. But every time she tried to start her sentence with the words 'the boy I like texted me', her tongue twisted itself. "No, it's really not important."

Chat cleared his throat, unsure of how to continue. Marinette shifted on her feet. Tikki pinched her flesh, reminding her that they weren't alone.

"Wha - what are you doing here? Why didn't you come back yesterday?"

Okay, so maybe there was some anger left.

"I came to see you." Marinette crossed her arms and shifted one hip to the side.

 _Why didn't you come to see me yesterday?_

Sensing her displeasure, Chat continued, "I didn't come back yesterday because. . . well, have you - I mean, of course you have, _everyone_ has. . . what I mean is, I'm sure you've seen the picture of me and Ladybug, right?"

Marinette tried her best not to flinch but knew she had failed. She bit her lower lip to keep it from trembling. She was _not_ going to cry in front of him. She was _not!_

"I was just worried how you might react, because, you know. . . well, you know everything," he waved his hands vaguely and she nodded, because yes, she did know everything about his relationship with Ladybug.

Oh, this was the part where he told her that he had decided to stay devoted to Ladybug. That she had given him hope that his feelings may not be as one-sided as he thought. That they would have to stop whatever it was that they were doing, because he wasn't the type of guy that pursued one woman while sleeping with another. This is the part where her heart felt like it was being stabbed again.

"I didn't want you to think that I was sleeping with you while dating Ladybug, I would never do that."

 _Please, stop talking._ She wanted to hit something. She wanted to cry. She wanted to scream again. But she didn't do any of those things, she just stood there and listened.

"There's nothing going on with Ladybug! You'd be the first person I'd tell, you know. I just- I didn't want you to be angry with me."

"What?" She doubted he would have been able to hear her were it not for his cat ears.

Chat smiled nervously, "I just didn't want what we have to be ruined because the news blew things out of proportion."

"Oh," the rush of relief was so great she felt a little lightheaded. "No, I - I didn't think you were with Ladybug. I don't believe you'd be able to keep it to yourself if you were."

Chat gave a little startled laugh of relief and then pulled her into a hug. She worried about Tikki for a moment, but suddenly realized she couldn't feel the kwami. She must have snuck away while they were talking.

"I am the very spirit of discretion," he insisted.

"Oh yes, the leather and cat ears are _very_ discreet," she teased and he poked her in the side, causing her to giggle.

"The black lets me blend me into the shadows, I'll have you know."

"You nearly always fight in the day, though," she pointed out and Chat frowned suddenly.

"You win this round."

She laughed and pulled away, "I win _every_ round." She stuck her tongue out at him and turned back to the meal she had been preparing. "Anyway, would you like to stay for dinner?"

He whipped his head around nervously, as if he had just noticed that they weren't in her room. "Your parents won't be joining you?"

"My parents aren't in the city," she admitted, and then, feeling a little bold she added, "They won't be here all weekend."

"Huh," was all he said.

His lack of enthusiasm annoyed her. "Which you would have known if you had bothered to show up last night!"

"I said I was sorry," he pouted.

"Actually, you didn't," Marinette huffed. "Dinner, yes or no?"

She was startled when she suddenly felt his arms wrap around her waist, his chest pressed against her back. "I'd be delighted," his lips brushed against her ear and she did her best to focus on the pot in front of her. "And I am. . . sorry, that is."

Marinette nodded, not trusting her voice to not come out a high-pitched, strangled mess. As it was, she was worried he could hear her heart beating wildly. Which honestly shouldn't be a new sound to him, all things considered. Except there was nothing sexual about what they were doing. It was the domesticity of it all that made her blood rush.

It wouldn't be all that hard to imagine herself doing this everyday for the rest of her life. Even the fight would fit right in to their day to day life. Even without compromising pictures with Ladybug, there were still plenty of times that she had chewed Chat out for unnecessarily putting his life in danger, and she doubted that was going to change any time soon. But he would apologize and she would admit she was just worried, and he would hold her just like this while she cooked the meal they would share before going to bed together. It wouldn't be hard to imagine because it wasn't all that different from what they already had. Except, in her mind, he would still be there when she woke up.

"What are you making?" Chat's voice startled her from her thoughts.

She froze for a moment, suddenly aware of what she was doing. Was she really imagining a future with _Chat Noir?_ No, that was weird. The only future she had ever envisioned was with Adrien, and if she had truly decided to leave those fantasies behind then she should focus on herself, not replace him with somebody else.

Marinette cleared her throat and forced herself to smile, "Just some spaghetti."

Chat choked on air behind her but only waved away her concerns when she asked what was wrong. He seemed to like the spaghetti well enough as they ate, although that may have been because she kept looking at him weirdly.

With the newfound liberty of her parents being away, they decided to settle onto the couch to watch a movie on the television. Marinette cuddled into his side while he combed his fingers through her hair. It was nice and peaceful and she probably would have been lulled to sleep if she didn't have something planned.

Halfway through the movie, she turned her head to kiss his pulse point. He stiffened and made a low noise behind his clenched teeth.

" _Marinette,_ I like this movie."

"So, you've already seen it," she smiled and moved closer to nibble on his earlobe.

He made the same noise as his body shuddered, "I don't think your parents would appreciate me having my way with you on their couch."

Marinette flushed but laughed at his concerns. The idea was strangely tempting. The couch wasn't particularly comfortable, but she liked the thought of having sex where she wasn't supposed to. Maybe tomorrow, right now she had other plans.

"It's fortunate that my room is right there, then."

She reached down to palm him through his pants and he thrust into her hand eagerly before blushing violently. "Marinette!"

Leaning forward, she brushed her nose against his, smiling at the way he whined. "Do you really like this movie more than me?"

Chat growled suddenly and surged to his feet. She probably would have fallen if he hadn't gripped her tight and forced her legs to wrap around his waist, her arms interlocking around his neck on instinct. She found herself laughing, happiness bubbling up inside her as she looked down at him. _Oh, so this is what it's like to be tall,_ she thought before brushing his lips with hers.

He bit at her lower lip, sucking it into his mouth and her legs trembled. She was eternally grateful that he was strong enough and graceful enough to get them both upstairs, because she would have just slowed them down.

When he placed her on the bed and began tugging at her shirt, she pushed him back, "Wait."

The request seemed to physically pain him, but he sat back and stared at her, chest heaving.

"I want to try something," she began slowly. "Do you trust me?"

His eyebrow quirked beneath his mask, "Of course I do."

She smiled and licked her lips, knowing that what she was about to ask would be a lot. Possibly more than he was willing to give, and if he said no, she would accept it. It still took a few tries before she managed to speak. "Don't turn off the lights."

Chat tensed, a wild look in his eyes. "How - I mean - that would mean -"

"I won't look at you," she assured him. Her words silenced him, but he still looked worried. Her courage faded, and she couldn't get her mouth to work. Deciding that the best course of action was to just show him, she sat up and then turned her back to him. Glad that he couldn't see her blush, she pulled her shirt off and quickly unclasped her bra, throwing both to the side.

She heard his breath hitch and realized he had finally caught on to her intentions. She unzipped her pants and moved them down her thighs, along with her underwear.

"I won't look," she promised.

There was moment of tense silence where she was sure he would just leave. Then quietly, "Plagg, claws in."

He was at her back again, his arms around her waist, his civilian clothes brushing against her skin. "I trust you," he whispered, placing a gentle kiss at her shoulder.

To say that she wasn't tempted to peek would be a lie. It was a terrible temptation, especially when he began shedding clothes and there was nothing but skin against her. She had always thought that the sensations he caused in her were more intense because they were in the dark, and without her sight her other senses went into overdrive. But despite the lights still being on, when he ran his hands down her thighs to remove her clothes completely it was still the best thing she had felt in her life.

Her back arched when his hand trailed down to between her thighs, her head falling back against his shoulder. She had to bite her lip to keep herself from turning her head to kiss him.

It was almost a relief when he finished teasing her and guided her to her hands and knees. He trailed kisses up along her spine, his chest settling against her back, his mouth on the back of her neck. She grabbed onto his hand, the one without the ring because she wasn't allowed to see even _that_ untransformed, and brought it to her lips.

Chat turned his hand so that his fingers intertwined with hers and she smiled against his skin. When he began to enter her slowly, she bit down on his flesh.

 _Mine._

* * *

When Marinette woke up, she noticed three things very quickly. One, she was still naked. Two, there was light pouring in from the open curtains. Three, she was not alone.

She blushed as she saw that Chat Noir was very much awake and blatantly staring at her.

"Good morning," he smiled at her.

Marinette pulled up the sheet to cover the lower half of her face. "How long have you been awake?" How long had he been staring at her bed head as she snored?

"Not that long," he answered airily. He was still smiling, so she decided to believe him.

She wasn't sure what to do next, never having had to deal with the morning after. Even without her parents around, she had thought she would wake up alone, since he probably had to show up at home to assure his family that he wasn't dead. It was still early in the morning, so perhaps he didn't have to be anywhere yet.

A smile tugged at her lips as she realized this was the only part missing from the fantasy she had cooked up the night before. Even if it was a stupid fantasy, it was nice that it had somewhat become a reality.

She lowered the blanket, "Would you like some breakfast?"

He smiled at her like she had given him the sun, "That'd be nice."

* * *

 **A/N:** Marinette is _definitely_ the one with the claiming kink. All she wants is someone to call her own, and all Adrien wants is to belong somewhere, so it works out!

 **Yes, I know** a blindfold would have worked just as well, but the point was that he _trusted_ her to not break her promise.

 **I have no idea when their birthdays are!** I wanna say Adrien's is in autumn and Marinette's is in spring, because season 2 is after the Christmas special. But that just confuses me because where I live children born in/after September get held back a year. **Let's just say ALL the seniors are already 18!** Please, for the sake of my sanity.

In case I can't fit it into Adrien's next POV chapter, **you'd better believe** he spent like two hours wondering if maybe Ladybug was even the tiniest bit into him, before finally deciding it was just in his head. But, of course, he's not going to tell _Marinette_ that!

This chapter's title is (translated) from **If by Kana Nishino** , the full lyric is "In the future you envision/ I wonder if I exist/ I want to look at/ The same sky feeling the same emotions." Which, is a big mood for this chapter.

As always, tell me what you liked, didn't like, and what could use improvement.

~ Destiny's Sweet Melody


	10. I Know You Feel Like You're Mine

**A/N:** Since I was fourteen, 60% of my year is taken up by k-drama hell. Anybody that's seen a k-drama knows about The Hug. It's awkward, it's aggressive, and most of the time the girl is hopelessly confused, but it's still romantic as hell. Anyway, here's Adrienette doing The Hug.

Also, small time skip.

* * *

 **All Your Love Is Revenge**

 **Ch. 10: I Know You Feel Like You're Mine**

Marinette's laughter pierced the night air as he tackled her into the snow. Chat Noir reminded her that they had to be quiet, but his admonishment fell short since he was laughing too. They were surrounded by potential witnesses, only in the park across from her parents' bakery, the only thing keeping them safe was the fact that it was near three in the morning and no one was really awake at that time.

Chat had just wanted her to see the snow as it was only in the darkest hours of the night: white, pristine, and magical. Come morning, pedestrians and traffic would turn it into gray, forgettable slush. It had just started snowing around New Year's, and it was only until now that the snow cover had gotten thick enough that it was worth looking twice at. If the weather stayed as it was for one more week, he'd be able to take her ice skating for their fourth monthiversary. It would have to be on a frozen pond, since he was sure she would only glare him into submission if he tried to convince her to break into an ice skating rink after hours.

Marinette had gleefully agreed to go see the snow with him, and had changed into respectably strong winter clothes before climbing on his back as he propelled them to the park. It had taken about thirty seconds of her admiring the landscape before she knelt to make snowballs and started pelting him with them. He had defended himself, of course - his princess was a fierce warrior princess and didn't need to be treated like a delicate flower - but he didn't have much experience with snowball fights and he was quickly overpowered by the winter games veteran.

So, he tackled her.

"Surrender," he declared, a wide smile on his face.

"Never!" She was still laughing so hard tears were pricking her eyes.

He shook his head so that any remaining frost clinging to his hair would fall on her and smiled as her face scrunched up in response. _So cute!_

Chat ignored the redundant thought - he was quite aware that Marinette was cute already - and reminded himself that they started school again the next day and it was almost three in the morning. They both needed sleep and it wasn't like he was planning on leaving her any time soon. Step one was getting them both back into her room.

He noted the damp condition of her coat, "We should get back inside. It's my civic duty as a protector of Paris to get you out of these wet clothes so that you don't catch a cold."

"Oh my, how kind of you," her voice was part amusement and part flirtation. "And are you going to help me get warm after you get me out of my clothes?"

Chat burrowed his arms under her, wrapping them around her waist and pulling her closer. "Of course! I don't shirk my responsibilities, Princess, I will keep you nice and warm."

Marinette's hands trailed up his sides, gripping the overcoat she had made and gifted him at Christmas this past year. It was the latest piece in what he liked to call the Chat Noir Christmas Collection. Marinette had given him some sort of winter wear each Christmas since he became Chat Noir. The first time was a simple scarf the same shade as his eyes. The second year was more complex, as it was a beanie designed to allow his cat ears to slip through. The third year was a black jacket with green claw marks on its sides. And then he'd gotten a neon green poncho he regretted he couldn't wear more often.

He loved his collection, even though he knew it wasn't unique to only him. Ladybug had been the one to show up with a coat made by Marinette and informed him she had for something for him as well the first year. Rena and Carapace had received some sort of couples themed green and orange matching scarves, and Queen B owned a pair of gold leg warmers that she wore even though she didn't seem too fond of Marinette for some reason.

Still, he was the only one that had received something each year and it made him feel special. Despite having worked with each of Paris' superheroes at one point or the other, he was Marinette's favorite.

"What are you waiting for, then?" she smirked up at him.

Chat quickly lifted her up off the ground and pulled out his baton. He didn't even chide her for her peals of laughter as they launched up to her room.

* * *

Things had reached a weird sort of stasis after that weekend Marinette's parents were away and he had spent most of Sunday with her. After slipping home to prove to Nathalie that he was in his room and then convincing her to let him go hang out with Nino, he had transformed back into Chat and raced back to Marinette. They had spent the day playing video games and watching movies and making out on the couch. She had seemed weirdly insistent on that, not that he was complaining.

Since then, their arrangement hadn't been as frantic as it had been at the beginning. It was still passionate, but there was no longer a voice telling him he was betraying his feelings for Ladybug, or warning him he was manipulating Marinette. It was a steady sort of passion; it was the knowledge that she would be there waiting for him no matter how he messed up. He ignored the voice that told him that was what a committed relationship felt like.

 _Shut up, Plagg._

Plagg had been calling Marinette his girlfriend since they were in collége, and the fact that the kwami had called Ladybug his girlfriend for just as long sort of weakened his insistence that he was serious this time.

"You're going to burn yourself out," the tiny cat being insisted in his usual blasé tone, but Adrien was sure he was just being annoying like usual.

He didn't fall asleep in class because he was _tired_ , it was because he already understood the concept and was bored! Nino had kicked him hard enough that he saw stars on the shin to wake him up before the professor noticed, so nothing even happened. And later that night he had mentioned the injury and Marinette had kissed the hurt away, which still counted even through the leather.

It wasn't his fault that his life as Adrien Agreste was starting to become busier since his father was finishing his winter clothes line only to start promotion for his spring line. Which meant more modeling jobs for Adrien. His only consolation was that as his modeling job grew more hectic, his akuma fighting job calmed down. Sometimes, he thought Hawk Moth was quite considerate of his day job, he always sent out less akumas at this time of the year.

His days tended to go much the same way: go to school, go to work, get home to cram as much homework as possible in as short a time as possible, so that he could go visit Marinette - which he usually only managed to do every other day, as it was. When he did see her, he did his best to be back home by three in the morning so that he could get a few hours of sleep before he had to go to school again. Except he usually didn't fall right to sleep, he usually found himself tossing and turning in bed or pacing across his room.

Sure, he was exhausted, but it had nothing to do with Marinette. On the mornings after he visited Marinette he would wake up with his muscles aching, but Marinette would show up to class happy as could be. It was obviously all his other responsibilities that were getting to him.

Besides, the pain would almost be worth it, knowing that he was the reason Marinette smiled so brightly.

"Why don't you think of yourself instead of a girl for once?" Plagg asked from his seat on Adrien's desk.

Adrien glared at his computer screen, trying to focus on the literature project he had neglected the entire school year. With everything that was happening, it was easy to push an assignment he had months to work on to the back of his mind. Except now he had a little over a month to do all the work since it was due on the last week of February.

"I'm just worried about you," Plagg admitted, floating over to grasp Adrien's wrist in the simulacrum of a hug. The rare show of affection was so shocking that he focused his attention on the kwami.

"You know I've always thought she was good for you, this Marinara girl-"

"Her name is _Marinette_ , and you know it."

"Whatever. You know I've always thought she was good for you, but this is getting ridiculous. You're going to drive yourself insane going at this pace. At least take some time to relax!"

"I relax," Adrien insisted. That was what his time with Marinette was _for._ It was the only time he wasn't a model or a perfect student or even a superhero. He was allowed to just be a person with somebody whose company he enjoyed. And it wasn't like they _only_ had sex anymore. They still played video games, they still talked about everything and nothing, sometimes they even got through an entire movie.

The time they saw _La Vita é Bella_ they didn't have sex at all, because Chat was too busy crying at the end, insisting the title was misleading and that life wasn't beautiful at all. Marinette had held him, whispering words of comfort, and then looked for a comedy movie that they watched until Chat was laughing again. By the time that movie was done, it was so late Marinette insisted he get home to sleep.

"If I could change something I would," Adrien admitted. "But I can't just quit school, and I have to obey my father about my job, and I- I _need_ to be with Marinette."

It was strange to admit it out loud. Other than his mother, he had never felt like he needed anyone, and even then, he only felt that way after she was gone. Not even Ladybug had ever made him feel that way. He had spent most of his adolescence _wanting_ to be with her, desperately so. To the point that sometimes he complained about the lack of akumas because that meant he couldn't spend any time with his Lady. But he had never needed to spend time with her like he did with Marinette. It never felt like he wouldn't be able to breathe if he didn't have her in his arms.

How dependent he was becoming was frightening at times, but he never doubted that she would always be there for him. She had been so understanding about the whole LadyNoir picture debacle, that he was sure that even if they broke their arrangement - that is, _when_ they broke their arrangement - and they each found their own partners, they would still have their friendship. Sometimes, it felt like their bond was so strong that nothing in the world could break it.

It was unfortunate that she couldn't be that way with Adrien as well. Maybe it was that Adrien was too perfect, or at least pretended to be. Marinette was loud, and joyous, and did everything with all her energy. There was a wildness in her that responded well to the wildness in Chat. Adrien Agreste, perfect, unflappable son of perfect and cold Gabriel Agreste probably did not fit easily into her life.

"I'm not saying break up with her," Plagg grumbled, releasing his chosen's wrist to glare at him instead. "I'm just suggesting a. . . break."

Adrien glared back. He had seen enough cheesy rom-coms with Marinette to know that "a break" was code for breaking up, and she would know it too. "No."

Plagg growled, "Fine! Destroy your mind and body. Ladybug has enough backup now to do just fine without Chat Noir after you crash and burn."

Adrien flinched at the anger in the cat kwami's voice and felt guilty for ignoring his concern. That was all it was, wasn't it? Plagg cared for him, despite all his snarky commentary and ceaseless teasing, he cared for him as a person and not just as the holder of his miraculous. It wasn't very often that Plagg expressed concern so blatantly, it was usually reserved for when Adrien was at his worst, so that he did so now meant that he actually _was_ worried he may crash and burn.

"I'm sorry, Plagg."

"Yeah, yeah. You just don't want me to keep you from transforming and seeing your girlfriend."

Huh, that was true. If Plagg really wanted to, he could just phase out of the room and stay away when he wanted to transform. The fact that he didn't meant that he still had enough faith in Adrien to trust he could handle it. Or that he believed him when he said he needed it. Either way, it meant he didn't really need to fear the kwami keeping him from transforming.

"She's not my girlfriend," he insisted.

"Oh, you're right. Girlfriend is much too innocent for what you've got going on. Your mate, then."

Adrien blushed at the word. It sounded primeval, but, at the same time, it sounded kind of right. There were good connotations to the word mate, weren't there? It meant protection and providing and comfort as well as sex. It sounded like the perfect descriptor for their relationship, and it was far more elegant than sex-buddy or FWB.

"My mate," he tried the term out and Plagg's eyes widened, startled that he didn't try to protest. Adrien smiled at his kwami, "I'll try my best to take it easier, okay?"

Plagg quirked an brow.

"Only four visits a week!"

Plagg smacked his forehead.

* * *

There was very little Adrien could do to improve his friendship with Marinette as Adrien. She was as kind and caring to him as she was to just about everybody she came into contact with. They talked between classes and they shared lunch with Nino and Alya as often as he could, but since his father insisted he eat a carefully curated diet it meant sometimes he had no choice but to go back home.

He would take what he could get, though, now that he had promised Plagg to cut back on his time as Chat Noir. When the teacher announced they would pair up and peer review the first draft of their literature projects, he took it as a sign.

"Nino, pair up with Alya," he whispered, knowing that his best friend would assume they would be together like they always were when they could choose.

Nino huffed a laugh of surprise, and looked a second away from rolling his eyes, but turned to his girlfriend. "Hey, babe, come work with me. It'll be rad."

Alya blinked, "What about Marinette? We always work together."

"She can be with Adrien," he answered nonchalantly.

The blogger looked startled. Her eyes flicked from Nino to Adrien to Marinette back to Adrien before narrowing at Nino for a few seconds. It wouldn't be _that_ weird if he worked with Marinette, would it? They were friends, weren't they? Finally, Alya smiled widely, and it looked almost devious for some reason. "That sounds perfect! Mari switch with Nino, I want some quality time with my boo."

Marinette's eyes widened like a deer in the headlights and she glared at her best friend. Honestly, they were just being rude now! Alya and Nino kept smiling like they had just pulled the greatest prank on Marinette when all they did was make her pair up with him. Her blue eyes narrowed, but she picked up her stuff and switched seats as asked.

"Hey, Marinette, how are you?"

She nodded noncommittally, "Fine."

Behind them, the loving couple giggled and Marinette glared at the air in front of her. "Want to work in the library?" she offered suddenly. A few of the groups had already left the room, the teacher not caring where they worked as long as they were back before class ended.

At least in the library his best friend wouldn't be laughing at him like a traitor!

"Sure, library sounds good."

They found an empty table towards the back of the library and settled in to work quietly, actually focusing on their assignment instead of using the opportunity to gossip like Juleka and Rose were doing a few tables away. Or at least Marinette was focused on her work. Adrien, on the other hand, was staring blankly at her essay, trying to pretend that he didn't already know each and every word of it. He had even helped her on some of it!

She was still stubbornly clinging to her belief that the poem provided a negative view of love and women in general, but at least at this point she wasn't calling the poet a sexist pig. The one time he had tried to defend the poem as romantic, she had glared and declared, "Romance is dead."

Apparently, it had been dead since 1906.

Honestly, she wasn't wrong in her assertion that the robber wasted his lover's death by flying into a blind rage and getting himself killed, _but_ he doubted she understood the highwayman's feelings. She didn't make an effort to understand what he was feeling to make him turn right back around and enter a battle he knew he couldn't possibly win. She didn't know what it felt like to _need_ someone to the point that life wasn't worth living without them like he did. The highwayman, he means.

It _was_ romantic, even if it was tragic. But her essay was well written and had enough scholarly sources to back up her point of view that he knew she wouldn't have a problem writing her final draft.

"You're perfect," she declared suddenly. "I mean, your essay! Your _essay_ is perfect."

Marinette flushed prettily and then, seemingly overheated, pulled off her coat, revealing the cream colored turtleneck she was wearing underneath.

Adrien swallowed heavily, "Really? I kind of did it last minute." As the weather was now cold enough that no one would look twice if she wore turtlenecks and scarves, she had _so_ _generously_ allowed him to go crazy on her neck and upper chest. And he had. He could still remember the way the marks had looked against her porcelain skin when he left that morning.

"Well you can't tell at all," she insisted, tugging at her sleeves. "It's better than mine and I've been working on it since October!"

He forced himself to tear his eyes away from her neck and look her in the eyes. Tried to shut off the voice in his head that had begun a litany of _mine, mine, mine, mine_ since the first time they had sex with the lights on and hadn't ever really stopped. They'd only kept the lights on one other time, not because he didn't trust her, but because he didn't trust himself to not turn her around and force her to look at him. To growl _mine_ into her mouth and have her cry out for Adrien instead of Chat.

"It shows, your essay's really good." He really hoped she didn't recognize the needy strain in his voice.

"Thanks, I had help," she told him easily. And then suddenly seemed to panic, as if worried he would ask after her study partner, "We should get back to class." She hurriedly gathered her supplies and stood so he had no choice but to follow her lead.

Marinette was a blushing, jittery mess as they silently walked back to class. She looked so cute he couldn't help himself. "I don't have any work on Friday, would you like to go see a movie?"

She froze so suddenly that he walked right into her and then jumped away when she seemed to curl in on herself. Her eyes were wide when she turned to him and when her mouth opened only a high-pitched sound came out.

Adrien panicked. He hadn't meant to freak her out! He only meant as friends, only wanted to get her more comfortable around his civilian self. Maybe he should have told her in front of Nino and Alya so that it would be a group outing. He really hadn't thought it through and -

"I'd love to," Marinette interrupted his mental rambling with a soft smile on her face.

"Really?" He couldn't keep the pleasant surprise from his voice. "That's great, I -"

"Oh wait, no, I can't!"

Wow, he's never had a smile drop from his face so quickly before.

"I, I mean, it's not that I don't _want_ to. I'd love to! It's just- I just have a da- I, on Fridays I have a tradition. . . with a friend. We movies watch. Fridays we watch movies! So I can't go out, I need- I mean," she cut off her rambling and took a deep breath. "I already have plans on Friday, but I'll be happy to go to the movies with you on any other day."

It took Adrien a moment to put a semblance of order to her words. She couldn't go to the movies because she already had plans to watch movies on Friday. . . with Chat. She was rejecting Adrien for _Chat._ Her weekly movie marathons with Chat were important enough to her that she wouldn't go out even though she had said she would _like to._ He smiled again, much more brightly this time.

He pulled her into a hug and did his best to ignore the way she stiffened in his arms. It was probably weird considering he couldn't really think of a time he had hugged her without the mask, but he couldn't help himself. He was really lucky to have someone like her in his life. "You're a really good friend, Marinette."

Ever so slowly, her arms came up and gently landed on his sides. "You thank. I mean, thank you! You're good- a good friend too."

* * *

He _really_ couldn't help himself. Not even Plagg could blame him, honestly. The kwami had only sighed when he asked to be transformed. He knew that if he wanted to keep his promise - and he fully intended to do so - _and_ spend his weekend with Marinette, that he wouldn't be able to see her again as Chat until Friday, but he couldn't help himself. He needed to make sure she knew how much he appreciated her thoughtfulness.

Chat waited on a roof from across the Dupain-Cheng's bakery until it was late enough that her parents would be asleep before crossing over and knocking on her skylight. He barely gave her time to greet him before he captured her lips in a hungry kiss and carried her to the bed. Marinette quickly gave in to his eagerness but had the presence of mind to make him close the shutters before he dropped his transformation.

He was harsher than he was usually was, practically ripping her clothes off her and slipping inside her so quickly he was surprised she was so wet. Clearly, she liked it when he was rough. He'd focus on that fact later, at the moment he could only focus on the feeling of her skin and the way she practically squirmed beneath him.

Distantly, he felt her hands claw a path from his lower back around his waist and to his navel as she peaked. For the _first_ time that night, he quickly decided. He didn't give her time to recover before reaching for her breast and playing with her nipple, and smirked at the way she struggled to keep her moan quiet.

He nibbled on her jaw and he _knew_ he shouldn't, he really did, but he hadn't been able to quiet the voice that kept saying _mine, mine, mine,_ and now _mate, mate, mate_. He couldn't stop himself from pleading, "Say you're mine."

His hips stuttered for a moment when he realized what he had said. That was crossing a line, he knew that. Friends with benefits didn't belong to each other, that was the point. Marinette didn't think in terms of mates, she'd think he was getting confused as to what it was they had together. His breath caught as he tried to think of a way to explain his words, but then her back arched and she pulled his hair and desperately whispered, "Yours, yours, I'm yours, I'm yours."

And it was the sweetest thing he had ever heard.

The next morning, Marinette had stumbled into class glowing and giggling and pointedly ignoring any of Alya's inquisitive glances. Adrien hadn't realized he had a goofy grin permanently etched onto his face until Nino leaned over and asked, "Dude, is something going on between you and Marinette?"

Adrien quickly disabused him of that notion, because he couldn't risk Nino telling Alya and it eventually getting back to Marinette. He'd just have to better control his emotions, he was a model, he could handle it.

What he couldn't handle was his father.

He hadn't even closed the door before Nathalie called to him, "Adrien, your father would like to speak to you _now_."

The emphasis was to make it clear that he wouldn't be able to use homework as an excuse to avoid him. Adrien sighed but made his way to his father's office, already knowing what this would be about.

Marinette had never needed to hold back when it came to leaving marks on him, because he had never asked her to. He knew enough about cosmetics to cover up the most obvious of blemishes himself, and his father, at the very least, did not ask him to pose shirtless very often.

Camila Espinoza, the head of his makeup team on the job, and who had been doing his makeup since he was twelve, had only choked back laughter and quickly covered up his hickies when she recognized them for what they were. She made teasing remarks sometimes, especially that one time she had seen scratches on his back, but he accepted it because she didn't report it to his father and it almost seemed like a sisterly thing to do. He trusted the Spanish woman to keep his secrets with nothing more than a twinkle in her eye and the willingly given right to poke fun at him every once in a while.

The problem was that she wasn't the _only_ one on his makeup team, and sometimes she was too busy to do his final touch ups herself.

The problem was that his father had spies everywhere. Occasionally, there were people on his payroll whose entire job was to watch for any supposed wrongdoing in the company and report it back to Gabriel Agreste. Adrien had seen more than one life ruined by his father's whistleblowers exposing behavior he didn't approve of.

Evidently, it was his turn now.

"Adrien," his father's voice was as calm as it always was, but he could still tell he was displeased. "I would like to speak with you."

"Yes, Father?" Adrien's hand twitched to his abdomen, where the marks of Marinette's nails were still noticeable under his shirt.

Gabriel's eyes flicked downwards before drilling back into his. "Do you know why I have insisted that you not enter into an _intimate_ relationship until now?"

Oh, were they going to play word games? Great! Adrien was good at those by now. "Image?" He'd heard the lecture before. Once, when Chloé spread the rumor that they were dating, and again when his father realized he had a crush on somebody, not realizing it was the untouchable Ladybug. "The image of the company?"

"And your safety, as well," his father insisted. "There are many women in the world that would use you for your money and your connections. Most of them would. I don't want you to be hurt because you were. . . seduced by some harlot."

Adrien did his best to not let his anger show. His father didn't know he was talking about Marinette, and if he blew up it would only prove to his father that he was being "corrupted" by some mysterious honey pot.

"I have not been _seduced_ by anyone, Father. Thank you for the concern, but as you pointed out, if somebody was dating _the_ Adrien Agreste it would be all over social media by now."

He did his best to focus on the concern and not the control. His father didn't even stop to wonder if perhaps Adrien was capable of making his own decisions, like he wasn't smart enough to decide if a woman showing interest in him was being sincere or not.

"True enough," Gabriel nodded and Adrien took that as a dismissal. He was halfway out the door when his father spoke again, "Oh, and Adrien, if I find out that you're lying to me, that there _is_ somebody that's taking advantage of you, I will make their lives _very_ uncomfortable."

Well, so much for that friendly date with Marinette.

* * *

 **A/N:** I don't really like Gabriel. As a character, he's interesting, as a (fictional) person, _yeesh_. I don't like that there's a 99.99% chance that he's getting a redemption arc. I don't like that he's portrayed as a tragic figure while _teenage girls_ are portrayed as irredeemable monsters. I wouldn't even like him if he pulled a Vader and sacrificed himself to save his son from an even Bigger Bad.

On a more positive note, Adrien was much more pleasant to write this time! I actually enjoyed it, that showed me.

 **La Vita é Bella** (Life is Beautiful) is a 1997 Italian movie starring Roberto Benigni and Nicoletta Braschi that is one part love story and one part Holocaust story. It's a truly beautiful movie, but it made my entire Italian class cry and our motto for the rest of the school year was "Life isn't beautiful at all."

This chapter's title is (translated) from **El Amante (The Lover) by Nicky Jam**. The full line is, "Baby, I feel like I'm yours/ I know you feel like you're mine."

Also, watch k-dramas if you haven't, they are a gift to this world.

As always, let me know what you liked, didn't like, and what you thought could use improvement!

~ Destiny's Sweet Melody


	11. Intoxicate Me Now

**A/N:** When the recurring joke finally lands.

So, there was another small spike in reviews last chapter, most of them concerning my opinion on Gabriel. You guys _did_ read the part where I said **he's an interesting character, I just don't LIKE him,** right? I'm not devaluing him for what he is, I actually think he's one of the better villains in ongoing media, even compared to "adult" shows. But understanding doesn't mean liking, and, to be honest, the reason I won't ever like him is because as the actual child of someone who loves their spouse more than their offspring, he just rubs me the wrong way. I don't think it's romantic or tragic. But, quite frankly, I love that he's remorseless, so I don't _want_ him to be redeemed anyway.

 **To I Made A Review:** Thanks! Please tell me what I did right lol

 **To KwibKweb:** That was actually a deliberate parallel between them (deep down, I don't want Adrien to hate/lose his father), but I never said it was a _good_ thing, or that it wouldn't come back to bite him. I mentioned above why I don't think Gabriel's plight is romantic, but (as I also mentioned) I don't HATE Gabriel. I actually love him as a villain. That's why I don't want him to be redeemed into a watered down version of himself. And I Most Definitely want Adrien to choose a different path if he found himself in the same situation. It'd be the worst hypocrisy if he didn't.

 **TL;DR:** I can understand a character, and even appreciate their role in the plot, and still not _like_ them.

Also **small warning** for this chapter: there is a brief mention of a certain bodily fluid on a certain somebody's chin. I'm not sure how you could get this far into this smuttiness if that grosses you out, but there you go.

* * *

 **All Your Love Is Revenge**

 **Ch. 11: Intoxicate Me Now**

March was the season for panic amongst lycée seniors. It was the time for _le bac_ and term papers and final exams. Naturally, that meant that as early as January, things began to get a little high strung as everyone looked to the future and only saw the barrel of a shotgun staring them down. The fact that there weren't more akumas at this time was kind of a miracle, though Marinette supposed people had begun to take therapeutic techniques for calming oneself more seriously now that it was known that any little tiff could unleash a monster on the world.

It was only mildly surprising to Marinette that a loud argument could be heard the moment she and Alya stepped into the school. She moved towards the commotion on instinct, having long since decided that it was part of her responsibilities as Ladybug to stop any akuma attacks before they happened whenever she could. Alya sighed but followed after her.

Marinette wasn't surprised to see Lila Rossi at the center of the commotion, it was more surprising that she wasn't the one causing the fight. Instead, she only stood stoically, almost bored, looking at the shouting girl in front of her.

"This isn't fair! I've worked my entire life for this and you just took it up as a hobby! You _stole_ my position in the orchestra!"

Marinette had been vaguely aware that Lila had randomly decided to learn to play the flute one day, if only because she worried that she had somehow remembered being Volpina. After Lila's lies had blown up in her face back in collége, she had been briefly ostracized by the school at large. During the lull in her social life, she had bought a flute and joined the school band, which only served to keep her from the popular crowd even more.

It wasn't until they entered lycée and she started wearing tight shirts and short skirts that her popularity started rising again. Her reputation for sleeping around made it so that she would never reach the top of the social ladder, but it also made it so that she would never be at the bottom. Even if she _was_ still playing the flute in the school orchestra.

"You should have worked harder," Lila replied uncaringly, and Marinette took that as her cue to interrupt.

"Everybody knows that you only got the spot because you're sleeping with the conductor!" the other girl cried, and the crowd hooted their agreement.

"Hey, that's not fair!" Marinette came to stand beside Lila. She had meant to stand in the middle, but she was honestly tired of girls being judged for their sexual experiences. "That's disrespectful to Lila _and_ the conductor. I wonder what he'd say if he knew you were spreading rumors like that just because you're angry."

The girl gaped, her mouth opening and closing without sound, and Marinette quickly backtracked. "You need to calm down. It's just a spot in the school orchestra, not the end of the world. You lost this time, you'll win the next."

She breathed a sigh of relief when the girl closed her mouth and nodded like a five year old that was just reprimanded. She looked disappointed when she trudged away, but not akuma level disappointed. Though it wouldn't hurt to keep an eye on her. The last thing Marinette needed was to add more fuel to the akuma bait comments.

Sensing that there would be no more fight, the crowd dispersed until only Lila, Marinette, and Alya a few steps away remained in the hallway.

"Thanks," the Italian girl said suddenly, absentmindedly running her fingers through her long hair. "You didn't have to do that."

"Somebody needed to," Marinette asserted.

"But she was right about how I got the spot." Marinette choked on air while Lila giggled, "I'm just kidding! I've actually practiced very hard to get as good as I am."

Unused to such a sadistic humor, Marinette only smiled awkwardly at the taller girl. In the lull, Lila cleared her throat and pointedly stared towards Marinette's neck. "I see you're wearing a turtleneck." Marinette clutched at her burning cheeks, remembering the last conversation they'd had. "Are you still enjoying yourself?"

What an accurate euphemism. "Yes - I - yeah." She hoped Alya didn't understand.

Lila was half a head taller than her, but she somehow still managed to look at her through her eyelashes. "Would you like to go for a coffee sometime? To talk? This honesty thing isn't working too well for me, but I like talking to you."

"Um, yeah, sure," Marinette agreed, startled that Lila was referring to something she said three years ago. She hadn't expected her to remember. "I have to go to class, but we can make plans later."

"Okay, see you later."

Marinette stumbled over her feet, unsure of what it was that had just happened, as she joined Alya in walking towards their class. Her best friend was looking at her strangely, but she didn't say anything until Marinette petulantly asked, "What?"

"Nothing! I just think that if you're trying to make Adrien jealous, the girl on girl probably won't work. Most guys think that's hot."

Marinette felt herself pale and her jaw drop open. "I'm not trying to make Adrien jealous!" Wait, no, that's not what she wanted to say. "There's no girl on girl going on!"

Alya looked at her disbelievingly, "Mari, girl, you just accepted a date from Mademoiselle Flirts-a-Lot."

"It's not a date, it's coffee! To talk!" Lila probably felt like Marinette was the only person she could talk to about all the _boys_ she dated. Or slept with. Whatever. The point was Marinette had joined the ranks of the fallen and their ranks were small enough that Lila probably felt like they had to stick together. But she couldn't tell Alya that, considering that she still thought Marinette was a virgin.

"We are adults now, and adults don't say 'do you want to go the movies,' they say 'wanna get coffee?'"

Oh, so that _wasn't_ a date Adrien was offering. Just as well, considering it had been a week since he had offered it and he hadn't mentioned it again. It didn't really bother her, and Marinette took comfort in the fact that she finally seemed to be honestly getting over him.

"Oh my gosh, girl," Alya burst out laughing, causing Marinette to pout. "You really didn't know? You need to tell her no next time you see her."

"I can't do that _now!_ Besides, you're wrong, Lila's just being nice."

The blogger snorted, "She's only ever nice to you."

That was. . . kind of true. But it was only because Marinette was the only person to approach her after all her lies were exposed. Part of it was because she was scared of Volpina coming back, and part of it was guilt. The first lie to be exposed was the one about Ladybug, which she had exposed just because she was jealous, and from there all the others had just unraveled.

It wasn't Marinette's proudest moment, and the only way she could think of making it even a little bit better was by approaching her and offering her comfort. "Just try to be honest. I'm sure people will like the real you." It had been such a simple thing to say, she hadn't thought Lila even remembered.

Apparently she did, and she was kind to Marinette because of it.

"You're blowing things out of proportion," she asserted as they took their seats. "It's not a date."

"Date?" Adrien asked as he and Nino twisted in their seats to look at them.

Alya gleefully leaned forward and whispered, "Mari's having her first lesbian experience."

"What? Dude, for real?" Nino seemed strangely proud. Adrien looked weirdly shocked.

"No, not for real," Marinette insisted. "I was asked to get coffee, to _talk_ as _friends_ do. We -" she punched Alya on the shoulder "- go out for coffee all the time. You're not hitting on me, are you?"

"Well, if you offered. . ."

"Alya!"

Alya only snickered before patting Marinette on the shoulder, "Look, girl, maybe the reason you never found a man is because you deserve a nice girl."

"Alya!"

 _Ugh, how embarrassing!_ She knew damn well _why_ she had never gotten herself a man. At least, not one she could go out with in public. If she was trying to make Adrien jealous by implying she was about to start swinging for the other team, it didn't seem to be working. He looked like he was blushing, but stayed quiet otherwise. Huh, maybe he _did_ think girl on girl was hot.

"It's _not_ a date," she insisted. But, maybe, she should tell Lila no anyway.

* * *

There was a niggling thought in the back of Marinette's head that refused to leave her. It had started when Adrien hugged her. That was something she had dreamed of for a long time, but when the moment finally arrived, it was strangely underwhelming. It was a nice hug, that was for certain, but it hadn't been quite as electric as she had imagined it to be. Of course, they had both been wearing various layers at the time and she had stood there like an awkward goober for far too long, so that may have had something to do with it.

And then Chat had showed up in her room like a man possessed, and had shown her what all those bodice rippers meant when they said the heroine was thoroughly ravished. It had been what wet dreams were made of, and she had gotten caught up in the moment, and before she knew it she was telling him "I'm yours." Which was _totally_ and _completely_ his fault, because he asked, and she was just following his lead.

Except. . . she wasn't _totally_ against the idea of being his, per se.

It was an intriguing idea, and she supposed she could admit to herself that it had first formed in her mind in October when he held her as she cooked. She had just pushed it to the back of her mind because things had been good between them and she didn't want to ruin it because of some confused feelings.

In the week that followed, she had realized that her reactions to Adrien were a bit out of whack. He still caused butterflies to appear, but. . . that was it. A year ago, the slightest hint of a smile would have sent her into a frenzy, planning their wedding and designing their future home in her head. Now, a hug was just a hug.

That was what she wanted, right? She wanted to let go of her feelings for him because they were hopeless. But if she was letting go of Adrien just because she was having sex with Chat, that would be worse.

She couldn't _be_ with Chat. He loved Ladybug, and even if she decided to be with him as Ladybug like Carapace and Rena were, she still didn't want them to reveal their identities to each other. For one, the allure of Ladybug would probably fade the minute he found out she was Marinette. And more importantly, Chat was still safe, his identity was still safe, and she didn't want to risk him just because the sex was good enough to confuse her.

She didn't want half a relationship behind a mask. She wanted all or nothing, and right now she was okay with the nothing.

She pulled out the folder where she had kept the posters of Adrien because _of course_ she had kept them. They were a bit dated, she hadn't dared to cut out any magazine pictures since she was fourteen, but they weren't that different from the real thing. He hadn't changed that much, his face was just thinner and more masculine.

Marinette sat and stared and stared and stared. . . and nothing! What was wrong with her? Was she disappointed? Relieved? Empty?

When she heard a familiar thump behind her, she panicked. She had forgotten that she had opened the skylight when she got home, the weather perfect for circulating cool air throughout her room, and she had never closed it. An open skylight had always been an open invitation to Chat. She shut the folder and shoved it into the nearest open drawer before slamming it shut.

 _Oh no,_ her hands stayed splayed against her bottom desk drawer. _That wasn't suspicious at all._

Chat had always been so good about respecting her privacy, but he was so cat-like and, well, what was that about cats and curiosity?

Her heart sped up when he kneeled beside her. "What have you got there, Princess?"

 _Oh no, no, no!_ She had kept her crush a secret for so long, he couldn't find out now! Especially not _now_ that she wasn't even sure what she felt anymore.

"Nothing," she managed to say and then mentally berated herself. She should have just made something up! Now he would definitely want to peek. Did she _want_ him to find out?

"Oh, okay then," he leaned back on his heels.

Was that it? He was just going to accept her word? Was he actually maturing? Marinette breathed a sigh of relief and removed her hands. And then immediately jumped when Chat's arm zoomed past her, opened the drawer, and dug around before yanking something out.

"No!" she shrieked, not even thinking about how loud she was being, rising up after him as he jumped away.

"Are you keeping secrets from me, Princess? That's not very nice," he teased, holding his arms up where she couldn't ever hope to reach.

"That's not anything! That's not - it's not. . ."

It wasn't the folder. Marinette's mind went blank with relief when she realized he was holding a book instead of a manila folder. Then she noticed which book it was and a scream got stuck in her throat.

Chat seemed to notice what he was holding at the same time, his smile dropped and his voice was small when he spoke. "Does that say Kama Sutra?"

Desperation kicked in and Marinette threw herself on Chat, wrapping her legs around his torso to push herself up and reach the book. "I said it's nothing."

Her struggle seemed to wake Chat back up, as he smiled and spun quickly to disorient her. She curled herself around him, clinging to his back.

"You bought a Kama Sutra book?" His voice was infuriatingly cheerful. "Which positions do you want to try first?"

"There will be no positions," Marinette insisted, her eyes shut tight as if that would stop his teasing.

"There should be some positions," Chat insisted.

She felt a sudden drop and then the bed was at her back, Chat keeping her pinned with his body. When she opened her eyes, he had an arm outstretched in front of him over her head, and when she looked the damned book was open. Her face burst into a violent blush at the sight of the pornographic pictures.

"I should have burned that book," Marinette lamented.

Chat snickered, "Why would you do that?"

She wasn't sure if he was teasing or actually asking, but she answered anyway. "It's embarrassing!"

He kissed the tip of her nose, "No, it's not. It's a best seller, you know. Why did you buy it if you weren't going to use it?"

That was even more embarrassing! "I. . . I was just curious, I guess."

"Am I boring you already?"

He was still smiling, but she still felt the need to assure him. "No, I - I was afraid I was boring you."

He froze for a moment, looking at her in surprise. Then he smiled and pressed his forehead against hers. "You are the furthest thing from boring, Marinette. You're like catnip, I can't get enough of you."

 _Oh no_ , her heart was racing, and there were butterflies in her stomach, and all she could think was that she hoped he would never, ever get enough of her. It felt like she could live forever with nothing but moments just like this.

"Fine," she said, shifting to raise her right leg until it was pressed against his shoulder. "One position."

* * *

Marinette had never thought of herself as sexually voracious. Really, she didn't. Despite all recent evidence to the contrary, she thought she was quite _tame_ when it came to sex. In fact, once she had thought that sex would eventually lose its appeal, since it seemed like a pretty repetitive exercise. The fact that she was having sex multiple times a week wasn't because she _needed_ it, it was because the opportunity presented itself and she had never been one to let good opportunities go to waste.

Then Chat had told her he wouldn't be able to see her for a _whole week!_ And, quite possibly, two.

Honestly, he didn't deserve centuries old sex techniques designed to better oneself and one's life through physical pleasure! Considering he waited to tell her until after she was all pleased and boneless so that she would be least likely to hit him. She had hit him with her pillow, so that showed him.

To say that had left her in a bad mood would be an understatement. And, unfortunately, she hadn't been able to chase the bad mood away. It wasn't until the third day of glaring at textbooks and mindlessly tapping her foot a mile a minute that she realized why she was in such a bad mood. _Sexual frustration, you've got to be kidding me!_

It's not that she _needed_ sex, really, she didn't. She had just gotten used to it. It was impractical to try to break a habit overnight! Her only consolation was that she could text Chat Noir's baton with her phone, not that it was a direct line to him or anything. She could text him in the morning and not get a response until nighttime when he finally got around to transforming.

"Don't worry, girl, the senior trip will cheer you up," Alya placed a comforting hand on her shoulder.

The senior trip was not a school sanctioned event; not really. Every school had its own rite of passage that most, if not all, seniors tried to complete before graduating. Some schools had pranks, some schools had competitions, their school had "the trip." Nobody was sure how it had started, but for the last twenty years or so, the senior classes would pick a day - usually late January or early February - and travel to just outside the city limits where a haunted house was held.

Though the house itself had changed over the years, it served its purpose of being a test of nerve and courage. Besides, the _real_ challenge was seeing how far you could get while fooling around in one of the dark corners before the workers caught you. Not everyone partook of that tradition, of course, and Marinette didn't worry too much about it. Of course, she _may have_ been able to since there was a ninety percent chance that Chat went to her school. . . but then he disappeared!

"Sorry Adrien won't be going," her best friend continued and Marinette felt her stomach twist in the realization that she didn't really care. Alya seemed to be more disappointed she wouldn't be able to force Adrien to stumble through the darkness with Marinette with the hopes that he would suddenly get the urge to fondle her.

Maybe she should tell Alya to cool it with the plans. They weren't really necessary anymore.

"It's fine, it's not like he can help when he needs to work."

Adrien had left to a photo shoot in Italy about two days after Chat had disappeared, and the only reason she even took notice was because Alya had asked her how she didn't know that was on his schedule. Marinette couldn't even remember when the last time she cared to track his schedule was.

"You're so understanding," Alya cooed and pinched her cheek.

Marinette swatted her hand away but smiled. She could be a good girlfriend, couldn't she? Even if it wasn't to Adrien.

Or maybe she couldn't. Because she wasn't very understanding when it came to Chat. By the end of the week she felt like she was going to burst, and her irascibility had been noted by her very worried parents. Marinette had been able to wave away their concerns by blaming school related stress, but there was something in her maman's eyes that she hadn't seen since her birth control pills were discovered and she wasn't sure she could make it through another awkward talk.

She wanted _revenge._

Well, she wanted sexual gratification, but revenge could be just as sweet. Especially if she could get both at once. Tikki rolled her eyes when she asked for privacy but dutifully went into her dollhouse.

Marinette stripped herself of her clothes and laid back in bed, activating the camera mode on her phone. Then, feeling shy, threw the nearest sheet over her torso. It was dumb luck that had her blindly grabbing Chat's quilt. Tastefully arranging the quilt so that the swell of her breasts and the slightest hint of her v-line could be seen, she took a picture, careful not to include her face. She giggled and sent it to Chat.

There was no response, but she didn't actually expect one. The barrier broken by that single picture gave her the courage to take more. She tugged the quilt down to bare a single breast, then pulled it up to show off her toned stomach. She bunched it up at her waist so that all but her crotch would be exposed. She even included one of her hand between her legs.

She was blushing cherry red when she hit send, but she felt very pleased with herself. Revenge accomplished, she decided to take care of her other problem.

Her cell phone chirped when she was in the middle of pleasuring herself, and she would have ignored it except it sounded again and again and again. She angrily grabbed it and brought it to her face, if only because it might be an akuma alert on the Ladyblog, and suddenly felt a grin split her face when she saw that the messages were from Chat.

 _Kitty: Princess?!_

 _Kitty: Why?_

 _Kitty: I mean, THANKS, but I can't do anything about it_

 _Kitty: I mean I PHYSICALLY can't do anything about it right now!_

Marinette burst out laughing at his apparent frustration. _Good,_ she thought viciously. And then, so that he knew she hadn't meant it as a gift, she sent a horned devil emoji.

 _Kitty: I don't have the option of alone time when I'm not transformed_

 _Kitty: I might actually die_

 _Princess: Good, you deserve it :p_

 _Kitty: WHY_

 _Princess: You left me all alone_

 _Princess: Now you can feel what I've been feeling all week_

 _Kitty: Is this VENGEANCE?_

 _Princess: JUSTICE!_

Marinette snorted at herself. She was. . . not the best at sexting. It was her first time, give her a break!

 _Kitty: Did you just quote the Hunchback of Notre Dame at me?_

 _Kitty: Wow, Mari_

 _Kitty: I've never had a boner die so fast_

 _Kitty: All I can picture is Frollo singing about hellfire at me now_

Marinette had tears in her eyes from laughing so hard. She probably shouldn't have introduced Chat to the world of memes, but who was she to deprive a teenager from a well rounded internet education? He was particularly fond of the gif of Esmeralda demanding justice from the crowd, sending it as a defense of his more harebrained fighting techniques whenever she complained about them as Marinette.

It was his own fault for creating a Pavlovian response in her. Yet, she supposed she could go easy on him now, considering she was in a much better mood already.

 _Princess: Fine, Kitty, focus on this then_

The picture she attached to the message was of her completely bare body, the quilt thrown to the side. The bottom half of her face was included, her smile wide and genuine.

 _Kitty: You are an evil woman_

 _Kitty: But thank you_

* * *

On Saturday, Marinette and most of her class piled in to a van Juleka had borrowed from her brother. Juleka herself was driving, having gently rejected her mother's offer to drive and snarled at her brother's. Rites of passage were meant to be taken without help, after all. That wasn't stopping Chloé from having herself and Sabrina transported by limo.

The trip there was filled with laughter and excited chatter, and Marinette was surprised to find that she could genuinely join in.

Alya winked at her, "Told you the trip would cheer you up."

Marinette blushed, knowing full well what had actually cheered her up, but only nodded in agreement.

The haunted house didn't look like much from the outside. It was only a simple one-story building, a perfect rectangle in shape. What windows she could see had been painted over or boarded up. Marinette doubted it would still be in business were it not for her lycée; the line was so long, they were warned it would take an hour before they entered.

"What a way to kill the suspense," Alix complained, arms crossed and foot tapping impatiently.

"On the contrary," Max argued. "Suspense can only grow with anticipation the more time one waits."

"Boredom and anticipation are two different things," Nathanaёl opined smartly.

"It's ridiculous that _I_ have to wait with all of you," Chloé complained, her face an impressive shade of red that could be seen despite the shoddy outdoor lighting. "Don't they know who my daddy is?"

"Yeah, and his jurisdiction ends a couple kilometers that way," Alya smirked.

That Chloé was suffering with the rest of them was the only consolation.

Marinette shivered every time the wind blew. The weather had been getting milder recently, so she decided to wear a pink sundress, long enough that it reached below her knees, but made of a light flowing material and a matching, equally light jacket. She had forgotten that the temperature fell a few degrees after the sun went down, and honestly hadn't expected to be outside for so long. Her feet, in slightly elevated wedges, were sure to be killing her by the end of the night.

"Please don't get too frisky," Marinette warned Alya and Nino when they finally made it past the entrance. "I want to spend tonight in my room, not waiting for you to be released from jail."

Some people were already planning on doing so, but Marinette wasn't one of them. Luckily, neither was Juleka, so at least she was sure to get a ride, no matter who got left behind.

Alya grinned wickedly and wrapped her arms around one of Nino's, "Don't worry, we won't get caught."

Marinette glared but her best friend only laughed and pulled her boyfriend further into the darkness as everybody went their own way.

The inside of the haunted house was surprising. There was consistent fog that reached halfway up her calf throughout the building as well as a blacklight as the only guide. The space was surprisingly open, instead of a twisting hallway to lead you to the exit, the entire building was open, separated only by mirrors, grotesque figurines, and walls that moved, allowing customers to wander around and lose themselves. She could hear unsettling music and distant screams playing from speakers above.

She suddenly realized that she was alone. She had been abandoned by her entire class! Marinette huffed and began walking, her arms crossed over her chest. She wasn't scared, not one bit. The fact that she jumped when a giant animatronic spider fell from the ceiling didn't prove anything!

Marinette shrieked when she felt an arm wrap around her waist. Or tried to, at least; it was hard to do with a gloved hand against her mouth. Her feet were lifted off the ground as she was dragged backwards and spun so that she was pressed against a wall. She was very much aware that this had to be against some sort of rule that the workers had to follow.

Her leg lifted, preparing to kick back into their ankle when they spoke. "Good evening, _Purr_ -incess."

Marinette flushed as she felt his chest vibrate with a purr against her. She tugged his hand from her mouth, "Chat?" Was she dreaming? Had she blacked out from the fear way back with the spider? "How are you here?"

"I ran."

Marinette huffed and tried to elbow him but got nothing but laughter for her trouble. "I mean, aren't you supposed to be on your secret mission or whatever it is?"

"Got done early," he answered simply, placing a kiss on the nape of her neck. "You should wear dresses more often."

Her breath hitched when she felt the hem of her dress being lifted. "Wha- what are you doing?"

His hand was already at her inner thigh, "What? Haven't you heard of the school tradition?"

All the sexual frustration she thought she had gotten rid of the day before suddenly filled her again. She wanted him to raise his hand just a little more, she wanted to rock against it, she wanted it _so_ badly. But he currently had claws, and they were non-retractable.

Chat could probably overpower her by now, a far cry from when they were younger, but he didn't stop her when she turned to face him.

"You can't drop your transformation here," she pouted up at him.

"True enough," he placed a quick kiss against her lips. "But I thought we had settled -" he nipped at her neck "- that there are things we can do -" he kissed the spot between her breasts "- while I'm transformed."

He was on his knees so quickly, his head under her skirt, her underwear pulled down to her knees, that she wasn't even sure what he was doing until she felt his tongue against her.

Her back arched off the wall and she bit down on her fist to keep from crying out. Tikki was going to kill her. There was a part of Marinette's brain - the part where the Tikki voice resided - that was aware this was exactly the kind of thing the kwami had been warning her about. If anybody happened upon this shadowed corner and saw _Chat Noir_ with his head tucked between her thighs there would be hell to pay. Maybe he would be able to escape without being questioned, but Marinette wouldn't be able to, and there was no doubt that it would be all over social media in a matter of minutes.

There were so many ways this could go wrong. Her life as Marinette and her job as Ladybug could be shattered if somebody took a single picture. She should push him away and ask him to stop.

Instead, her thighs tightened and she lifted her skirt to get a better look.

At least it didn't take very long, as he was very well practiced at the act already. Her legs trembled and she felt herself sliding down the wall until she was sitting across from the grinning cat boy.

Marinette had to stifle her laughter when she saw her juices glowing against his chin. "At least I know how they keep catching people now."

She saw the moment he realized what she meant, his eyes widening as he furiously swiped at his chin. It only served to spread the glow across his hands and arms, making her laugh out loud.

Chat narrowed his eyes at her before a devious smirk overtook his face. He leaned forward and Marinette barely managed to place her hand over her lips before he made contact.

"Suffer with me," he mocked against her palm.

"No," she giggled. "I came here alone, remember?"

Chat breathed heavily through his nose before pulling back. His smile turned more genuine, "I missed you."

Marinette ignored the way something in her chest fluttered at his words, "I missed you, too."

"Can I come see you tonight?"

Why did it feel like the first time all over again? Why was she suddenly so shy? All she could do was smile bashfully and nod. When his smile grew she felt something warm inside her.

Then reality crashed into her, "Oh wait, no!" His smile dropped and she mentally kicked herself for her tone. "Alya asked for a girl's night, so she'll be sleeping over."

Chat nodded in understanding. Can't have the owner of the Ladyblog discovering their arrangement.

"Tomorrow, then?"

His eagerness pleased her.

"Tomorrow."

* * *

 **A/N:** I can't believe I forgot today was the 4th of July! I don't really care, but you know, social responsibilities and whatnot. I almost didn't update today, but then managed to get away early enough. It was still a bit of a rush job editing, though. Meh!

Did Adrien land in Paris, get home, transform, then run out of Paris just to mess around with Marinette? You'd better believe it.

Fun fact, **The Kama Sutra** is actually NOT a how to have better sex book like Hollywood would have you believe. It's actually a "self-help" book that teaches one how to improve their spiritual and physical selves through physical pleasure _in moderation._ Even though it does include sex positions, Vātsyāyana wrote, "two lovers, blinded by passion, in the friction of sexual battle, **are caught up in their fierce energy and pay no attention to danger."** So, it's not just glorified porn. Also, that quote fits that last scene to a T.

The haunted house is fictional, and I have no idea if French seniors have rites of passage like this. I based it on my hometown where the schools have pranks and challenges and whatnot for fun. I imagine teenagers everywhere are more or less the same.

This chapter's title comes from **Toxic by Britney Spears**. The full lyric is "Intoxicate me now/ With your loving now/ I think I'm ready now." The whole song is weirdly appropriate though.

As always, let me know what you liked, didn't like, and what could use improvement!

~ Destiny's Sweet Melody


	12. I Pass the Time Daydreaming

**A/N:** I noticed I horribly neglected Ladrien throughout this fic, but it's because I genuinely can't think of a reason why anybody would want to attack Adrien akumatized or not. It counts as Ladrien every time he thinks of Ladybug, right?

* * *

 **All Your Love Is Revenge**

 **Ch. 12: I Pass the Time Daydreaming**

Adrien couldn't pinpoint the moment he lost the ability to think rationally. Chat Noir wasn't known as the brains of the miraculous team, but he wasn't dumb. Foolhardy? Sure. Leaps without looking? Fair enough. Will happily take an avoidable hit if it means Ladybug goes unscathed? Absolutely. But not dumb.

When it came to Marinette, however, something in his brain turned off. Or activated a fog machine. The point was that he didn't think very clearly.

When he had arrived in Paris earlier than expected, but not early enough to join Nino and the others in driving to the haunted house, he had been disappointed but resolved to make up for his lack of sleep. Except he couldn't go to sleep no matter how hard he tried. He tossed and turned and paced until he suddenly realized what he wanted, even more than sleep, was to see Marinette. And maybe pay her back for those pictures.

It didn't take too much to convince Plagg to transform. In Italy they didn't do much other than sit on a high, shadowed corner to text, so he couldn't complain about being overworked. Not that it stopped him from complaining at his chosen with a venomous glare.

The fact that he didn't even mind that she didn't so much as touch him that night should have been his first clue that something was wrong. At the time, he could only be happy to see her.

She had promised to make it up to him the next day, anyway. He only had to wait twenty-one hours to have his princess in his arms again.

Adrien ignored Plagg's irate muttering about crashing and burning and slipped out through his window. It was still early in the evening, only eight, but the Dupain-Cheng family usually had early dinners and retired to bed shortly after.

He smiled as he saw Marinette's skylight open, and slipped in silently.

The blue-eyed girl startled when she saw him, and if he was in his right mind he would have noticed the way panic set into her eyes. When he pulled her into a hug, purring contentedly, she pushed at his chest. "You're not supposed to be here this early!"

Chat pulled back to blink at her, "Aren't you happy to see me?"

Marinette blushed, "Of course I am -" he sort of stopped listening after that. He could tell she was saying something, there were words coming out of her mouth, but he couldn't hear anything other than the fact that _she missed him._

"Marinette! Manon is here!" Madame Cheng's voice easily flew up through the open trapdoor.

Huh, he hadn't noticed that either. Marinette pushed against his chest, forcing him to stumble back a few steps.

"I'm sorry, I forgot I had agreed to babysit while my parents went on a double date with Nadja," Marinette hissed. "I'm sorry, you have to go, I'm sorry!"

Chat tried to do as she wanted, but he had barely turned towards the steps leading to her bed when a head full of wild auburn hair popped up through the trapdoor.

Marinette choked on what sounded like a scream, Chat froze, Manon blinked. Then her mouth opened wide as she inhaled, his hands flew wildly in front of him, begging the little girl to not do what she was about to do, but there was no stopping her. "Chat Noir!"

It felt like the world around him shattered.

"Plushie!" Marinette cried nonsensically. "Yes, Manon, you may have my Chat Noir plushie!"

The little girl blinked, surprise clear on her face, and then she grinned wickedly. "The Rena Rouge one too?"

Marinette growled but her shoulders relaxed, "Yes, the Rena Rouge one too."

The little girl leaned back dangerously in a practiced way that proved she did it all the time, "Bye, mama! Have fun!"

"Bye, sweetie," Nadja's voice floated up.

Nobody relaxed until the apartment door being shut sounded through the tense silence. Then Manon hopped into the room and ran up to the two teenagers. "I'll take my plushies now."

Blue eyes narrowed, Marinette moved to do as she was told.

"How devious," Chat muttered under his breath and then tensed when Manon turned her smirk on him.

"Who's more devious? A child that wants a doll or an older boy in a girl's room without permission?"

Chat felt himself pale, "Aren't you like nine?"

"I'm almost ten!" she corrected proudly. He didn't think he even knew _why_ boys shouldn't be in a girl's room when he was nine almost ten.

"Take them," Marinette shoved the handmade dolls into the little girl's arms.

Manon shrieked with delight and stuffed them into her oversized ladybug-patterned knapsack. "What are we going to do next?"

The rest of the night was spent being at Manon's beck and call. Cinnamon buns for dinner? Better fire up that oven. Watch a PG-13 movie that Nadja absolutely forbade her from watching? Children need to live a little! Decided she wanted the Carapace plushie to go along with her Rena as well? Well, they _were_ a couple, and Marinette could always make more!

His princess glared at him when he mentioned that, but it was nothing compared to the look she gave him when Manon convinced him to take her across the rooftops on his back.

"Absolutely not! That's dangerous," Marinette argued, arms crossed, hair blowing in the wind on her balcony. "She's too young, would you do this with _your_ kids?"

Chat didn't feel it necessary to mention that he was barely three years older than Manon the first time he used his miraculous, "If I'm still Chat Noir when I have my own kids, you'd better believe I'm taking my kittens for rides like this."

"Be careful!" Marinette huffed at the same time Manon commanded, "Full speed ahead!"

It was obvious which one he was going to obey, "As you command, little miss!" They needed to please her to make sure she didn't tell anybody their secret, after all.

By the time midnight rolled around, Manon was completely tuckered out. She was sleeping on the ground, her head nestled on her babysitter's lap as the older girl ran her fingers through her hair. Marinette was leaning back against Chat's chest, his cheek nuzzling hers as she hummed a nonsense song.

Chat suddenly understood why there were so many jokes about sex lives dying a fiery death after having kids. His body ached horribly. He knew part of it was the utter exhaustion he had endured the past week, but a part of it was taking care of Manon, and another was the persistent fear that she would tell somebody about him visiting Marinette despite everything they had done. Children weren't the best at keeping secrets, even if they didn't mean to do any harm by telling the truth.

Despite not having been able to think of anything other than being with Marinette for over a week, when her parents finally arrived, he knew he would be leaving. He didn't want to have to go through this again for a very long time.

 _No having kids until we're thirty,_ he thought tiredly and then froze against her when he realized what he had just thought.

Marinette stopped humming and nudged his head with hers, "What's wrong?"

"Nothing," he insisted quietly. "Just tired."

That's right, he was just tired. He wasn't thinking straight because he had barely gotten more than ten hours of sleep in a week. He wasn't going to have kids with Marinette. _And I don't want to,_ he reminded himself. He wasn't even sure if he was going to see her again after graduation, hadn't ever asked her about what she had planned. Was she going to stay in the city or study abroad? Would she try to keep in contact with him or move onto a more substantial relationship once they were out in the real world?

Heck, he wasn't even sure what _he_ was going to do! He had grown used to just obeying his father's will. He was sure Gabriel would want him to quit school, or, if he allowed him to continue his studies, would want him to stay in the city where he could keep an eye on him. He wasn't sure what sort of future awaited him, but he was almost certain there would be no Marinette to keep him company, and that fact was unbearably painful.

"Chat, you're hurting me," Marinette's voice interrupted his thoughts as her hands smacked at his arms which were wrapped around her waist like a vise.

"Sorry," he loosened his grip and kissed her neck. _Mine._

"Are you sure you're okay?"

He felt guilt at the worry in her voice and nodded against her shoulder. Marinette didn't need to be worried because of the somber thoughts his sleep deprived brain came up with. He wanted to keep her happy for as long as he could.

 _Mine. My mate._

* * *

There were moments that Marinette got a distant look in her eyes. They were quiet moments, when they were playing video games or watching movies or each doing their own thing. When he was _with_ her, she was with him, but there were moments when it seemed like her mind was a thousand miles away.

It felt lonely. He couldn't be sure, but he thought it had started the week before he left to Italy, and it only seemed to get worse once he came back. His breath caught in his lungs when he considered she might be getting bored of him.

She still smiled when she saw him, still cuddled into him when he hugged her, still sighed when he entered her like it was the only thing she ever wanted. There wasn't much difference from how she always acted around him, but that was the problem. She had always acted like a girl that was in love with somebody else.

Which was fair, because he was in love with somebody else too. Marinette was his mate but Ladybug was his love. His heart still stuttered to see her, her smile still lit up the night sky, the world was still a better place for her presence. He still loved Ladybug.

 _But -_

But Marinette was his mate, and he hadn't considered how territorial he would get when he claimed her. Whenever she got that distant look in her eye and he considered that she was thinking of her love when he was sitting _right there_ , he had to fight to keep a snarl from escaping his lips.

"Can you tell me about your love?" he asked because he was a masochist.

Marinette startled and a small blush bloomed on her face, all but confirming his suspicions as to the direction of her thoughts. "I don't really want to talk about him right now."

Chat leaned into her, draping his body over hers so that his chin landed on her chest and she leaned back to rest her weight on her elbows. "Why not? You never minded talking about him before."

Her blush grew, "Don't remind me."

A purr started in his chest when she began running her fingers through his hair. "Why would you want to know about him?"

He didn't, not really. At right that moment, he just wanted her to keep petting him. He shrugged and made a nonsensical noise, but that was apparently enough for her.

"He's. . . really nice. And kind. Brave. I think. . . I think he's secretly very lonely, but he always does his best to make everybody else happy. I've seen him joke with strangers, and help little old ladies across the street, and play with children he doesn't even know just because he wants to make the world a better place. He's one of the best people I know. Oh, and he's handsome, too!"

He had never wanted to use Cataclysm on a person before. Well, okay, he had wondered about it, but he had never _wanted_ to until he heard the fondness and _adoration_ in her tone. He had thought. . . well, he had thought that maybe she liked him a little bit too. It was unfair of him to want that, but he couldn't help it.

"Kitty?" Marinette placed her hand between his shoulder blades and he was suddenly aware he had tensed his shoulders so much they were by his ears.

Chat breathed deeply, forcing himself to relax. "Sorry," he grinned widely. "I'm a little stressed right now outside the mask."

Marinette frowned but didn't say anything. He had always been impressed by her lack of curiosity concerning his civilian self. Or rather, her ability to control her curiosity. He could tell she wanted to ask him about it sometimes, but she knew that he couldn't tell her anything.

Even if he wanted to, and sometimes he _really_ wanted to, he wanted Ladybug to be the first person to know he was Adrien Agreste. He wanted to see her eyes widen in surprise as she realized that the shy, pretty boy she had saved a few times over the years was also the courageous man that was willing to take a knife for her and had fought by her side all this time. He wanted Ladybug to see all of him, and accept all of him. He wanted Ladybug to love all of him.

 _Then_ he could reveal himself to Marinette.

Once he had Ladybug, he could deal with Marinette rejecting both sides of him.

"You can keep petting my hair, by the way. That helps."

"Silly Kitty," she giggled but resumed her ministrations.

He closed his eyes and did his best to forget her words, focusing instead on the feeling of her fingers in his hair. The purring started up again when she moved upwards to include his cat ears. Then she _bit_ one. Chat's eyes snapped open, though he couldn't see anything through the white hot pleasure that flowed through his body. He felt himself tremble before plastering himself against her body, all but humping her leg to relieve the sudden hardness in his crotch.

It stopped just as quickly as it started and he froze against her, as if not making a sound would make her forget what he just did. Marinette slowly released the leather ear and pulled her head back.

"Oh my," he could hear her heart beating wildly.

Chat felt his face burn, "Don't laugh."

There were things that he couldn't help, side effects of the miraculous that he usually didn't mind. He purred when he was happy, and even though the other miraculous users teased him for it, they never mocked him, and Marinette seemed to enjoy it. He liked cuddling and having his hair pet, but he was so touch starved as Adrien he was pretty sure ninety percent of that was him. But he was pretty sure this was just his kwami's revenge, because the cat ears didn't even have _nerve endings_ why was this happening?

 _I'll get you, Plagg._

Then Marinette bit the other ear and he decided to be merciful.

* * *

"Do you ever think about dating?" He didn't ask because of the gift.

There were still four days until their fifth monthiversary - _five whole months of being with Marinette_ \- and he had been at the mall with Chloé when he saw the perfect gift. So far, he had only given her ephemeral things: chocolates, flowers, and ice skating. It seemed like the next step was to give her something more permanent. She had given him winter garments made by her own hand even before they started sleeping together, and she had given Adrien her lucky charm. She deserved something she could hold onto for longer than a few days.

Besides, it was _perfect._ She was his princess, after all, and every princess deserved a crown. That it was small enough to fit on her finger just made it funny. Chloé had a ring like it, he knew. But hers was large enough to reach her knuckle, shaped like Queen Alexandra's Kokoshnik Tiara and made of diamonds.

The one he bought for Marinette was small, shaped like a coronet made of rose gold with small gems the same shade as her eyes. He'd bought it because the tagline was _fit for a princess_ , not because he'd briefly imagined himself down on one knee while he slipped it on her finger.

It wasn't a _promise_ , it was a joke, a _pun._ She liked puns. . . more or less.

He asked because it was dark and she was sighing so contentedly as he placed kisses on her back. He asked because he had finally reached the point where he had enough stamina to give her a satisfying round two, and he was confident that given the right refractory period he could even give her a round three and that wasn't an ability he was about to let go to waste. So he needed to waste time and distract her.

"No," she said simply. "It'd be crossing a line to date someone while I'm sleeping with you, and I don't want to stop sleeping with you."

 _That wasn't what I meant!_ He had to bite his tongue to stop from shouting the words at her. It was just as well that she misunderstood, the whole point of what they were doing was that neither of them wanted to date unless it was with the person they loved, and those people didn't love them enough to date them.

 _I meant you and me._ Still, he was glad it was dark and she couldn't see the look on his face.

"What if that boy you've been crushing on for four years asked you out?"

Again, he's a masochist. He had to feel his way down her body, and he was glad for the darkness again as his hand trailed down to her waist. He missed the way her hair looked against her back and being able to see her every dip and curve, even though he'd only been able to see those sights twice, but he appreciated the excuse to touch her all over. Marinette pushed herself back against him and grabbed his hand to guide him to her core.

"I don't think I'd believe him if he suddenly showed interest," she sighed when he began to trail a finger over her folds. "Besides, I think I - _ah_ \- I think I've - I've gotten tired of - of - tired of _wai_ ting! Under - understand?"

No, not really. He knew he would wait forever for Ladybug since the day he met her. He was _still_ waiting for her. This was just comfort. He was lonely and Marinette was lonely and there was no reason they should be lonely if they had each other.

"Are you over him then?"

He should probably stop pumping his fingers inside her if he actually wanted an answer.

Marinette was rocking her hips the way she did when she was about to find release, but she managed to answer anyway. "I don't know. I think I - I think I'll always love him - but not - not _love_ \- not love, love, love."

Her walls clenched around his fingers and he bit down on her shoulder, doing his best to not growl out _mine, mine, mate._ Her answers pleased him, despite knowing that they shouldn't. He'd always had a problem with claiming things that weren't his to claim. He'd caused L'Imposteur because he claimed Ladybug when she wasn't his to claim, and she had given him the stink eye for a month afterward.

Marinette would probably push him off the balcony if she ever found out he had half a mind to spend the rest of his life chasing away anyone that so much as looked at her.

"So you have zero interest in dating?"

 _What if I asked you?_

Marinette turned over to face him. Her hand landed on his shoulder before trailing up his neck and cupping his cheek. "Why are you being so insistent about this?"

 _Because you said you were mine._

"I was just wondering."

He felt her breath against his chest as she huffed and then she was pushing him onto his back. She straddled him, her wetness landing right on his hardening member, and she slowly began to rock back and forth.

"I thought we agreed that love is stupid. I don't want - don't want to date right now. I don't care about that. I just want - I just want you."

When he didn't come right then, he impressed himself. He gripped her waist to lift her up, allowing her to position him at her entrance before lowering her. He groaned like it was the only thing he ever wanted.

"I just want you too."

* * *

Adrien loved Ladybug, he was sure of that. He'd loved her since he was barely a teenager, and he had loved her well. He fought beside her, he supported her, he would die for her. He couldn't think of a truer love than being willing to die for somebody. His father had all but died when his mother disappeared, after all.

Except. . . except he wanted to live for Marinette. He could imagine living for her, with her, quite easily. He could imagine going home to her after patrolling as Chat Noir, he could imagine sharing dinners with her, he could imagine taking her to bed. He could even imagine her leaning against his chest as she hummed a lullaby to their child.

It wouldn't be all that different from what they already shared.

But that wasn't what he wanted, not really.

What he wanted was Ladybug, like he had for years. He just had to wait for the day they could share identities and then she could get to know all of him, instead of just the character he pretended to be in front of akumas. Marinette had always told him that he was practically different person with her than he was with Ladybug - at least, as far as she could tell through Ladyblog videos - and she liked who he was well enough.

Ladybug had been right, half a relationship wasn't enough. With her, he had the romantic attachment without the physical comfort. With Marinette he had the physical comfort without the romantic attachment. All he had to show for it was insomnia and a grumpy kwami. He wanted a whole relationship, with _Ladybug_ , and no he wasn't just trying to convince himself at this point.

 _Shut up, Plagg!_

The last five months couldn't overpower the last four years. Despite how easily he fit with Marinette, he knew he was fated to be with Ladybug. It didn't matter how much he loved Marinette, he had loved Ladybug longer and -

 _Wait. No. . . Shit._

He _loved_ Marinette. When had that happened? Nothing was different! He didn't feel anything new when he was with her, just the same warmth and comfort that she had provided him with since the day she explained what the blackout curtains were for. It had meant so much to know that she cared about his secret and his friendship enough to go through all that effort. He had looked at her and she had smiled and it was like the sun was rising despite the fact that it was the middle of the night and -

 _Shit!_

How could he be so stupid? He loved Marinette, and he had loved her for so long that it had simply become part of his being. It was such a calm and patient love that he hadn't even noticed it was there. It was in the way she smiled, and the way she comforted him, and the way simply sitting beside her felt more like home than the mansion ever did. Adrien felt himself start trembling.

He loved Ladybug, but he loved Marinette too. He was a little afraid he might love Marinette more.

 _Shut up, Plagg._

* * *

 **A/N:** I honestly did _not_ start this fic thinking _Adrien The Most Oblivious Agreste_ was going to be the first to come to his damn senses. To be fair, Marinette/Ladybug will deny her attraction to Chat Noir to her dying breath in canon, so it's in character, I guess?

I did, however, 1000% know Manon was going to be the first to catch them and would blackmail them. That's a well written child character they've got there, sassy and adorable, I love her! Chat calling her "little miss" is lowkey an anime reference as it's how the term **ojou-sama** \- an "heiress type" that is used to having her every order followed - is usually translated.

Plagg is the OG Adrienette shipper, you can't change my mind.

This chapter's title is (translated) from **Andas En Mi Cabeza (You're Running Around My Head) by Chino & Nacho ft. Daddy Yankee**. The full lyric is, roughly, "You're running around my head at all hours/ My world is spinning, you make me lose control/ Because I pass the time daydreaming that/ I married you and loved you forever."

As always, let me know what you liked, didn't like, and what you thought could use improvement!

~ Destiny's Sweet Melody


	13. Your Love Was Handmade For Somebody Like

**A/N:** I'm honestly not any less imaginative when it comes to naming akumas than Hawk Moth is.

 **To KwibKwib:** Welp, she's certainly making a decision by the end of this chapter! lol

 **To I Made A Review:** Thank you so much for the compliment! I'm honored to be ranked amongst "the few" that managed it :)

 **To Guest:** I know what you mean, and I hate myself for it, but given the nature of this fic it's hard to fit any of the other sides of the Love Square in it. You might not like this chapter if you're looking for Adrienette, but honestly I just love the drama of the Reverse Love Square lol. Hopefully, you keep reading though!

* * *

 **All Your Love Is Revenge**

 **Ch. 13: Your Love Was Handmade For Somebody Like Me**

Marinette was pretty sure that the entire world was against her. She had always known that Manon was the devil hidden behind a cherubic face, and her using blackmail to get the handmade plushies she had been yearning after for years wasn't that much of a surprise. No, the surprise, the salt in the wound caused by getting outsmarted by a nine year old, was when she stopped by the bakery while Marinette was working.

She had smiled impishly and promised, "Don't worry, I won't tell anyone you're Chat Noir's girlfriend."

Despite Marinette insisting she wasn't his girlfriend, Manon would hear none of it. Again, the fact that she was blushing cherry red probably made her seem less imposing.

"I can see it in your eyes," Manon explained before sneaking an éclair to nibble on. "You _love_ him!"

Marinette had chased her out as she squealed with laughter, éclair proudly clenched in her small fist.

 _The devil_ , the blue-eyed girl reminded herself. But, still, what if she _could_ see something? It seemed foolish to be so unnerved by an actual child - she was probably just repeating something she heard in a love story made for children - but she couldn't help it. Because what if there _was?_ What if people could _see_ that she was. . . well, not in _love_ , but certainly something more than like.

 _There's nothing in my eyes!_

There was apparently something on her face, however.

"Who are you texting?" Alya's voice burst the bubble she had found herself in, lounging on her best friend's couch as the sepia haired girl tapped away on her laptop.

"No one," Marinette answered honestly. "I'm reading."

"Anything I've read?"

"Doubt it," she replied noncommittally. Considering she was reading over her texting history with Chat, she was pretty sure Alya had never read it.

"Well, you're smiling at your phone like it's telling you sweet nothings," Alya smirked.

Marinette froze. It was obviously a joke, and it wasn't even close to the truth. Chat didn't text her sweet nothings, he texted her puns and memes. She was only rereading them because she was bored and wanted to be entertained.

"It's just dumb jokes!" she defended.

Alya quirked an eyebrow and then frowned. "You know, I've been meaning to ask something for a while now. Well, actually, it's not that long. Just since the senior trip, really."

Marinette felt the blood drain from her face. She was reasonably sure nobody had seen the, er, stuff on her palm that night. Mostly because she had exited the haunted house alone, her friends having abandoned her to the darkness. The worker at the exit had snorted at her glowing palm, and she had blushed beet red, but that was it. No one she was ever going to see again had noticed. And there was no reason to believe the worker had happened to stop Alya to ask her if she was friends with the girl in the pink sundress because he had gossip to share.

Still, it took a few tries to utter a simple, "Yes?"

The blogger looked down at the ground before finding her courage and staring her best friend in the eye, "Do you still like Adrien?"

Well, she certainly still panicked whenever anybody brought up her crush. "W-what? Why would you ask that? I don't certainly like - I mean, certainly don't like anybody else!"

"It's just. . . you don't really seem to care about him anymore. I mean, of course you _care_ , but not anymore than, say, I would." Why was Alya so perceptive? "And, I mean, you don't have to like somebody else to get over him. You can just get over him."

Very true! Also, not really the case right now, and she sighed inwardly at the thought that she was so shallow she constantly needed someone to crush on. If she had just a tiny bit more self-worth, she thought spitefully, she would have gotten over Adrien due to his lack of attention, not because she was getting attention elsewhere.

"I. . . do you really think so?"

Alya shrugged, "That was just my guess."

Marinette pulled on the tip of a pigtail, "If I was. . . and, if I - if there was somebody else, would that make me shallow?"

Alya's jaw dropped and she blinked owlishly before snapping her mouth closed. "Is there somebody else?" She seemed eager, running over to sit by Marinette's side on the couch. Her hands gripped the smaller girl's arms tight, "Is there?"

"Maybe?"

"Am I supposed to know the answer?" the bespectacled girl deadpanned.

Marinette giggled nervously, an uneasy grin appearing on her face. Alya would probably know as well as _she_ did. She wasn't in love, she wasn't! It was the endorphins messing with her head because she was honestly weak emotionally and positive emotions were enough to make her think she was in love. Hadn't she fallen for Adrien after a single act of kindness? Sure, his personality and his every action had only served to strengthen those emotions, but maybe she had fallen too quickly for someone she barely knew.

She couldn't afford for that to happen again.

Except she _did_ know Chat. Knew him better than anybody else in the world, and he knew things about her that she never dared share with anyone. Not her parents, not Alya, not Tikki. No one. She had always been afraid to show Adrien her true self, afraid he would find her too abrasive, too headstrong, too annoying, but she had never really worried about what Chat thought of her. If he didn't like Marinette it was no big loss because he would still be her friend as Ladybug.

But he _did_ like her. He liked her enough to visit her at least once a week for three years, to trust her with his hopes and fears, to cuddle with her in the darkness. And he found her attractive enough to sleep with her.

It wouldn't be weird for them to date, would it?

Marinette blushed as she remembered their conversation the night before. Or rather, what they were doing while talking.

"Oh my gosh," Alya squealed. "There _is_ somebody else!"

"No!" Marinette cried instinctually. She had spent _years_ trying to repress her attraction to Chat, but of course she found him attractive! He was kind and brave and funny, and even with the mask he wasn't lacking in the looks department. A small voice in her mind had always been sure that if it weren't for Adrien she could have easily fallen for him. Now, if there wasn't an Adrien. . . "Maybe? Ugh, I don't know!"

"Hey, Mari, it's okay," Alya's voice was strangely soothing. "It's okay to move on."

"I don't know if I have though! When I'm alone, I think I am. I don't think about him like I used to, I don't track his schedule, I don't fawn over his pictures online. I don't _care_ like I used to! But, when I see him, I still get butterflies, I still think he's handsome, he's still the exact same person that I loved! Just - it's just different somehow. And when I'm with - when I'm with -"

Marinette shut her eyes, never hating the miraculouses quite as much as in that moment. She couldn't tell Alya anything. Not his name, not their arrangement, not even their friendship. How could she explain all the time they spent together without anyone finding out?

She felt a hand land on her head, and Alya's voice still held that same, gentle tone. "It's okay to like two people at once, you know?"

She blinked one eye open warily, "Really?"

"Yeah, Marinette, I love your energy and dedication to everything, but you don't have to love your every single crush with your all. It's okay to just like them, and see where it goes. Things would probably be easier if you just. . . let things be."

Maybe she could have gotten somewhere with Adrien, she means.

Alya had probably invested just as much time and energy in her crush as Marinette had! She wondered if Alya was disappointed that she had decided, seemingly overnight, that it wasn't that important.

"What if - what if I liked one more than the other?"

"Then you try with that one!"

Try? With Chat Noir? What would she even try? It's not like she could go out with him to the movies or to a nice restaurant. There was no future with him, no substantial future at least. She could be quite happy being catnip to him for the rest of forever. As long as he kept coming back to her bed at night, she didn't really care about what happened during the day.

But then what? Marinette had always wanted to get married and have children. Was she really willing to give that up for someone whose real name she didn't even know?

Besides, he loved Ladybug. She could wonder and dream and be willing to do all sorts of crazy things, but at the end of everything he would still love Ladybug. She ignored the voice in her head that reminded her that _she_ was Ladybug.

"I'm scared," she admitted in a small voice. She had always been scared when it came to love. If she was less scared, maybe she would be with Adrien right now. "I'm really scared."

Alya pulled her into a hug and Marinette could hear the smile in her voice when she said, "Real love is always scary."

* * *

Marinette had always thought real love was supposed to make you happy. Adrien had made her happy with his smile and his kindness and his existence. Right until she tried to talk to him, and then it felt like the world was spinning so fast she tripped over air and she couldn't find the right order for her words. Chat had made her plenty happy when they were friends, but now that she was considering being something more than friends - or friends with benefits - all he seemed to cause was anxiety.

Not even Alya's kindness could calm the storm in her heart.

She had no choice, no matter how afraid she was of the conversation, but to ask her mother for advice. Sabine Cheng was a wise, knowledgeable woman. She was also perceptive. Whenever her father mentioned how happy she was looking, her mother's eyes would narrow and her mouth would pucker. If it weren't for the fact that Marinette spent all her time either in school or in her room, she was sure they would have had another talk by then.

Thankfully, Tom Dupain was a little clueless. A trait his daughter had so unfortunately inherited.

Marinette bit the inside of her cheek as she walked up to her mother in the kitchen. Her father was still down in the bakery, so she couldn't think of a better time to try to have this talk.

"Maman, could I ask you something?"

"Of course, sweetie," Sabine answered without looking from her work. "What's on your mind?"

Marinette took a deep breath and practically shouted, "How do you know when you love somebody?" Sabine startled, dropping the spoon she was using to stir the stew she was making. "No, wait, that's not - I meant, how do you know when you love somebody more?"

That still wasn't right! Sabine stared at her daughter with wide eyes, before smiling gently, "I take it you like two boys?" Marinette blushed but nodded. "And you feel like you're being unfaithful despite the fact that you're not with either of them?"

That was. . . exactly right! "Have you gone through this before?"

"Not personally, but my cousin had four boys chasing after her and she always complained that she was genuinely fond of all of them and she couldn't choose."

 _No one's chasing after me,_ Marinette thought bitterly. "What did she do?"

"She left to a university and met her husband there," Sabine giggled.

Marinette stared, "So, I should. . . wait to find my husband in a university?"

"No, silly," Sabine shook her head. "She told me after that the problem was that the four boys from her hometown always gave her butterflies. That was why she was always so confused, because they all made her feel like the main character in a romance novel. But her husband, he was different. They were friends first, they learned to trust each other, and even though he sometimes gave her butterflies, more than anything he made her feel safe."

Friendship and trust and safety. Marinette's stomach clenched as her mind went straight to a masked man instead of a kind model.

Sabine clucked her tongue and placed her hands on her shoulders, "She told me once 'you should never marry the man that gives you butterflies. You should marry the man that makes you feel like you're home.'"

"Home?"

It took less than a second for Marinette to realize which one of them made her feel like she was home. Only one of them shared dinners with her, cheered her up when she was sad, went out of his way to protect her, and made her feel like she could realistically spend the rest of her life at his side.

"Is there something you want to tell me?"

Her mother brushed her bangs out of her eyes, and she flushed, "No, not really!"

"Marinette," there was a warning there.

"Really! It's nothing! Even if I did _you know_ l-love someone, that someone. . . that someone doesn't love me," Marinette admitted. "So, there's nothing to tell. I don't even know why I asked."

She didn't really like the sympathy in her mother's eyes, or the way she frowned as if _she_ were the one that had been rejected. Marinette liked the way tears sprang to her own eyes even less.

"Oh, Marinette," Sabine pulled her daughter into a hug. "Anybody that's too blind to love you doesn't deserve you."

Marinette sobbed out a laugh as she gripped her mother tight. _That was everyone!_ Her crushes never seemed to work out.

"He does, though! He deserves everything he's ever wanted!"

He had just never wanted Marinette.

* * *

There were two days until their fifth "anniversary." Marinette may or may not have marked the date in her agenda. With nothing more than a simple five, because she wasn't _stupid_ and she didn't want to have to answer any questions if anyone happened to catch a glimpse of it. Not that she was counting the days or anything.

It was just strange. Nearly half a year with Chat Noir. Not even half a year with Chat Noir. Whatever way she said it, it seemed overwhelming. It had been enough to turn her entire world on its head.

Sometimes, it felt like she couldn't breathe when she thought of it. She was almost glad when the akuma attacked. It was liberating to transform and swing across the rooftops. She didn't have to think of anything but the akuma she was meant to defeat.

Dreamer was a ghostly woman; hair, skin, and poufy dress all silver. She was one of the akumas driven by a warped sense of justice, believing themselves to be helping the people they attack. There were cocoons of silver thread all over the streets of Paris, the people stuck within asleep - living their dearest dream, if the akuma was to be believed - and simply breaking the cocoon seemed to be enough to break the spell.

Overall, she was not a particularly powerful or dangerous akuma. But she was a ghostly woman, and she seemed to phase right through every attack thrown at her.

The battle dragged on, and they were down three Cataclysms and two Lucky Charms, Rena Rouge and Carapace had already joined them out of desperation. Marinette had just finished transforming back into Ladybug when it happened. She had been so focused on not being seen that she ran right back into the fray and straight into a cocoon.

Ladybug closed her eyes, a scream stuck in her throat, and when she opened them again she was in a hospital bed. And she was Marinette.

There was something about the moment that made her realize it was a dream. Maybe it was the miraculous magic reacting to the akuma's power. Maybe it was that she wasn't panicking despite the fact that if she had been unconscious and untransformed when somebody pulled her out of the cocoon then somebody - possibly the whole world - would know she was Ladybug. Or maybe it was the fact that she felt impossibly happy.

She wasn't sure why that was. Given Dreamer's alleged ability, she had expected to see herself as the proud owner of a fashion boutique like she'd wanted since she was ten. She had expected to see herself defeating Hawk Moth. She could even understand seeing herself on a date with Adrien or in bed with Chat.

Being stuck in a hospital bed wasn't what she had pictured as her "dearest dream." Maybe her body was just trying to tell her it was overworked and would really enjoy being forced into rest for a while. Marinette allowed herself to relax, her head fell back onto the pillow and she closed her eyes, trying to focus on the positive feelings. It had been a long time since she had felt so blissfully happy. A part of her thought she had never felt it before at all. She barely heard the door open.

"Are you asleep again?"

Marinette's eyes snapped open at the new voice, but she stayed frozen. From this angle she couldn't completely see the person at the door, but there was only one person in the world with leather cat ears nestled in wild blond hair.

 _No, no, no._ She's not ready to accept it. No matter what she said to Alya or her mother. The only reason why she even stopped to consider it was because of what Alya said, but she was wrong. It wasn't okay for Marinette to love two people because both of them were out of her reach. It wasn't okay for Marinette to suddenly fall in love with her partner when she had rejected him for so long. Ladybug had hurt him so badly every single time she turned down his advances, even the most playful ones, and then she had comforted him as Marinette as if she had any right to show sympathy.

She didn't deserve his love. Not when she was so mercurial and unsteady in her emotions. So, she didn't love him, she _couldn't._ She refused to accept him as part of her dearest dream.

"I know you must be tired, but there's someone here who needs you."

That grabbed her attention. Maybe her dream world was one where he knew she was Ladybug and didn't hate her for it. She could accept that; maybe it would be easier to get over him if they could go back to just being friends - no sex, no hitting on Ladybug, just working together.

Marinette shifted so that she could see who needed her help and felt her heart constrict painfully.

 _No, no, no!_

She should have kept her eyes closed. The only person standing in the room was Chat, she couldn't be sure but he looked a few years older, his miraculous armor just the smallest bit different. He was still Chat, he still smiled at her like she was amazing, but there was something soft in his eyes that she had never seen before.

Marinette wanted to run away when he walked towards her, but she was glued to the bed, her eyes drifting down to what he had in his arms against her will.

He sat down on the bed beside her, "Princess, your prince has been crying for you."

She choked on a sob as she looked at the newborn nestled in a baby blue blanket. Green eyes blinked sleepily up at her, and there were a pair of cat ears in his dark hair. "That's not how genetics work," she wasn't sure if she was laughing or crying.

"Sure, but it's funny, isn't it?"

Her hands twitched towards the baby, but she stopped herself. The miraculous magic was keeping her aware, if she gave into it she wouldn't be able to break out. She would have to rely on the others to save her when they already had to focus on not getting caught themselves.

"You're not supposed to put headbands on a baby," she hiccupped instead. "They have a soft spot."

"But it's all the way back here," Chat gestured over his son's head in a way that indicated he had no idea where a baby's soft spot was.

His son. Her son. _Their son._ She wasn't exactly sure just how she could feel so utterly miserable and completely happy at the same time.

Slowly, she reached over to pull the headband off. Wispy strands of hair tickled her fingertips and she couldn't resist. _Just for a little while,_ she bargained and carefully took the baby into her arms.

He felt so real, despite being so light. She could feel his weight and warmth and every little twitch he made and breath he took. She could even smell him.

Chat reached out with a claw to stop the path of a tear halfway down her cheek, "Happy tears, I hope."

"Of course," she admitted. "I've been dreaming about this since I was fifteen."

"You never told me that."

It was just a dream. What did it matter if she told him? Why couldn't she just pretend for a little while? She had nothing to do but wait.

"I didn't understand back then. I thought I was just used to your presence. I didn't understand that, even back then, the only person I could see myself living a life with - a _real_ life with messes and accidents and imperfections - was you. I was so focused trying to have a perfect life, that I forgot that love isn't perfect."

Her parents weren't perfect. They made mistakes, they got angry with each other, they even fought sometimes, even though it never got so serious that it led to tears. Their life wasn't perfect but they were still so in love Marinette had always believed they were the only real pair of soulmates in the world.

She had always wanted to have a love like her parents, but she had chosen to focus on the beautiful big picture, and not all the little details that made up their relationship. She had been so focused that she had completely missed when she had found a love like theirs. She could have had it, even if it would have been only as Ladybug.

Rena and Carapace could do it, why couldn't they? Wasn't that what Chat had said? Hawk Moth wasn't going to be around forever, and she had always sort of thought that after he was gone they'd be able to reveal themselves to each other. They would have been able to be together outside the masks eventually.

Half a relationship was better than no relationship, after all.

"Hugo?" she asked slowly, not sure if the illusion would shatter if she didn't know her own son's name.

"What? You're going to change your mind _now?_ "

Marinette smiled shakily and shook her head. "I like the name," she leaned forward to rest her forehead against Chat's shoulder.

His arms automatically wrapped around her, "Are you really tired? If you are, I'll just get a nurse to bring a bottle for him."

"No, I just. . . want to stay like this for a while."

She ignored the implication of breastfeeding, not sure if she was willing to play along that much for the sake of keeping this feeling. She smiled down at the newborn as Chat began rubbing his cheek against the top of her head.

Why couldn't she just stay in this moment? Why would she ever have to leave? She certainly didn't want to. There was nothing for her in the real world. Any hope she had of getting over Chat had been completely annihilated, because how could she ever want anything other than this? And if she couldn't have it in reality then -

Marinette curled herself protectively around Hugo when the room shook suddenly.

Chat didn't seem to notice, "Do you think you can see the others now? They've all been waiting to see you."

"Ladybug!" a voice called out, piercing the walls and Marinette's eardrums, and for a moment she thought it sounded like Chloé. It was that thought, the abhorrent idea that Chloé Bourgeois was waiting to see her son, that woke her up.

Ladybug fell into Queen B's arms, the brightly colored heroine calling for her idol in a high-pitched, panicked tone of voice.

Later, they would tell her about how the usually upbeat young woman had turned into a vicious fighting machine to get to her. Later, she would see it with her own eyes on the Ladyblog and be impressed. Later, Ladybug would apologize to Queen B for how she had treated her, and the blonde would only smile and say she understood.

At the moment, Ladybug pushed Queen B away with a snarl, "Why did you wake me up?"

B's blue eyes were wide and wet with tears. She was distantly aware that Carapace was alone in distracting the akuma, Rena was nowhere to be seen probably off recharging, and Chat was a few steps away from them, had probably been on his way to save her when B succeeded. But none of that mattered because she could still feel her son's weight in her arms.

She placed her arms in a cradling position, as if that could make Hugo reappear, but it only served to make the sensation disappear faster. Her arms moved to wrap around her torso, and she bit her lip to keep herself from sobbing, though she could clearly hear herself whimpering. "Nobody told you to save me," her tears were overflowing but this wasn't the place to let them fall.

"My Lady, calm down," Chat placed a gentle hand on her shoulder. "She was only trying to help."

Ladybug shrugged his hand off. It felt like it burnt. Every gentle touch and considerate word reminded her of everything she would never have. Because he loved Ladybug, and once he found out she was just Marinette, he wouldn't love either one of them.

"Let's just finish this," she muttered listlessly.

Later, people would wonder what Ladybug had seen that made her fight so brutally against the akuma.

* * *

For once, when Marinette came home and broke down sobbing, she got to go to her parents and tell them the truth. She got stuck in an akuma attack, she had been so blissfully happy, and then she'd had it ripped away from her. Even though she knew it was for the best, she was angry that she had been saved by the miraculous team because she didn't believe she would ever be that happy again. For once, she got to cry on her father's shoulder while her mother whispered soothing words of hope and affection.

It helped a tiny bit. She felt drained of emotions, but at least she wasn't sad.

It felt like she could just think for once. She thought of when Chat asked her to describe her love and, though she had thought to tell him that she didn't love anybody anymore, she had found herself describing him. She could only be glad he was too dense to recognize who she was talking about. Even back then, even in the depths of her denial, her heart had started calling him _my love, my love, my love._

She had almost told him once, when he asked her if she still loved Adrien and she had been too focused on his fingers inside her to pay attention to what she was saying. "Not love, love, love," was what she had answered. What she had meant to say was, "Not like you, my love, my love, my love."

She found the energy to blush at her own idiocy.

She _must_ be an idiot. It was her own fault she was in this mess! It had been _her_ idea to start sleeping together. If she had just laughed and said she was joking about being friends with benefits, then she could still be blissfully unaware of her repressed feelings for Chat. She would still be pining away for Adrien, which, all things considered, wasn't the worst thing in the world.

With Adrien, there was always that one percent chance he might like her back, since, as far as she was aware, he didn't like anybody else.

With Chat, she was aware of how hopeless it was, because hers had been the shoulder he had cried on for three years over how much he loved Ladybug.

Oh, well, there come those emotions again. Marinette pouted and reached for her phone, hitting the most recent call and listening to the dial tone.

"Hello?" her best friend answered sleepily. "Mari, it's like three in the morning, what's up?"

"I would like to formally blame you for making me confront my feelings," her voice was brisk and businesslike.

"Feelings?" There was a moment of silence and then something that sounded suspiciously like somebody squealing into a pillow. "So, there is someone else!"

"No," Marinette asserted. "There is no one else."

"I don't understand."

"I l-love," she had to stop and clear her throat. It would be the first time she said it out loud, and even though she had already accepted it, she didn't feel entirely ready to say it for the world to hear. She forced herself to do it, anyway. "I love him. I love him so much more than Adrien. I love him more than I ever thought possible."

"Oh wow," Alya breathed. "Can I know the name of the person you're so crazy in love with?"

Marinette winced, "No. I - I don't think it's worth telling. I don't think it'll work out. I doubt I'll ever see him again after tomorrow."

"What? Why?"

"Because I don't want to waste any more years pining after an impossible love," she admitted. She thought she had run out of tears to shed, but she could feel one trailing down the side of her face to her pillow. "I know he doesn't love me, but I'm going to tell him anyway. The next time I see him, I'm going to tell him I love him."

* * *

 **A/N:** This chapter turned the Love Square from two people cockblocking each other because they're in love with each other's alter egos, to cockblocking themselves because they _believe_ they're in love with each other's alter egos lmao.

I keep cheating on akuma attacks, but that's really not the important part of the fic. Dreamer's been in the plan since day one, but the illusion was the important part, not the fight.

 **Fans can upload videos to the Ladyblog** which comes in handy whenever Alya is "mysteriously unavailable," so that's how Marinette saw the Queen B fight.

This chapter's title comes from **Shape of You by Ed Sheeran** , which _really_ fits this fic despite the fact that I don't really listen to Ed Sheeran (I know, I'm the devil). The full lyric is "Girl, you know I want your love/ Your love was handmade for somebody like me/ Come on now, follow my lead/ I may be crazy don't mind me." But, honestly, the entire bridge/chorus fits this fic!

As always, tell me what you liked, didn't like, and what you thought could use improvement!

~ Destiny's Sweet Melody


	14. Watch Your World Burn

**A/N:** You'd think everything would just fall into place, wouldn't you? Y'all remember that angst I kept mentioning?

 **To I Made A Review:** Hopefully, this chapter also gives you all the feels!

* * *

 **All Your Love Is Revenge**

 **Ch. 14: Watch Your World Burn**

Marinette liked to believe that she was the type of person that, once she made a decision, she stuck to it. And she _was_ going to stick to it. She was just tired because she had only gotten about three hours of sleep before she had to get up for school, and it's not like she had a way to contact Chat. She wasn't about to declare her love for him through _text._

There was honestly no reason for Alya to be giving her such a judgmental look.

"I just don't want you to lose momentum," the blogger intoned. "If you're showing initiative about this, then you need to do it before you chicken out."

"I will not chicken out," Marinette huffed.

"You said you were going to do it today."

"I said _tomorrow._ As in the next day, not six hours after we hung up!"

"Oh," Alya's brows furrowed. "I can't think straight, you shouldn't have woken me up before dawn."

Marinette smiled sheepishly, "Sorry, you're the only person I can talk to about this."

"It's alright, girl. Just have an epiphany during business hours next time."

Giggles escaped Marinette at her words, but her smile slowly dropped as she remembered something very important. "You haven't told Nino, have you?"

Alya had been the one to spill the beans about her crush on Adrien to the DJ. Even if she was obvious enough that all of the girls in class knew about it, the boys seemed pretty dense when it came to romance, and Nino was probably too laidback to care about anybody else's drama. He wouldn't have known were it not for his girlfriend - who wasn't even his girlfriend at the time!

"It was one time!"

"Alya," Marinette warned.

"No, I haven't!" she insisted angrily. And then, more uncomfortably, "I haven't had a chance to talk to him yet."

"Alya!"

"What? He's my boyfriend, I tell him everything! Or most things. Besides, it's not like he's going to judge you."

Marinette knew that was true. Nino was too kind to ever cast judgment on anyone and he could forgive just about anything. She wasn't sure why she was so worried about him finding out. Well, actually she did know, it just didn't make any sense, not even to herself. If Nino knew, it would just be a matter of time before Adrien knew. She knew he wouldn't care, and she shouldn't care what he thought either, but she was still worried.

Maybe she had simply spent too long worrying about his opinion of her.

She sighed tiredly, "Just don't say anything until I have an answer, okay? He doesn't need to know just how many times I can crash and burn when it comes to love."

Alya giggled but placed a comforting hand on her shoulder, "You know, you might be surprised. What if this guy likes you?"

It would be easier if she could explain things to Alya. It would have been easy enough to admit she knew he was in love with somebody else, she didn't have to say he loved Ladybug, but it was even more embarrassing to admit she had fallen for someone that she _knew_ was in love with someone else. Nino may not be judgmental, but his girlfriend certainly was. She didn't need to see her 'what were you thinking' look!

"I doubt it."

It would be a pleasant surprise if he did, but she knew better than to get her hopes up by now.

"Remember what I told you about setting yourself up to fail?" Alya teased.

Marinette smiled ruefully, "Yeah, yeah. I'll keep hope alive."

The blogger shoved at her shoulder, "I'm serious."

"So am I," she nodded decisively with a smile. "I will not go into this expecting myself to fail."

* * *

That may or may not have been a lie. Or, rather, it gave her an idea that she hadn't considered before. Chat would most likely reject Marinette if she asked for an actual relationship, _but_ he would almost certainly accept Ladybug if she asked for one. It would literally be his dream come true!

Marinette had the good fortune of _being_ Ladybug. She could have a relationship with Chat, and he would have his dream girl, and everybody would be happy.

It just seemed. . . manipulative. Just a _tiny_ bit. If she had been worried that sleeping with him without telling him she was Ladybug was a little messed up, then letting him date Ladybug without telling him she was Marinette was totally twisted.

He didn't want her. He had made it clear that he saw her as just a friend. A physically attractive friend, but just a friend nonetheless.

There were times that she thought he might feel something more for her. Small moments, so brief she could convince herself that she had only imagined them, that were rarely repeated. When he smiled at her with a soft and gentle warmth, when he held her like he never wanted to let her go, and when he would tell her she was amazing and anybody that would reject her was a fool. Sometimes, she could believe that Marinette had a place in his heart that was close to, if not equal to, Ladybug's place in it. She just couldn't convince herself that she hadn't imagined it all.

It would be safer for her to confess as Ladybug. If she confessed as Marinette, he would end their arrangement because he would probably feel like he was taking advantage of her feelings by continuing to sleep with her without feeling the same way. And then she would lose him, friendship and all. She would only see him at akuma attacks and the occasional patrol. If she confessed as Marinette and he rejected her, she doubted she'd be able to face him again even as Ladybug.

If she confessed as Ladybug from the beginning, then he would _still_ end their arrangement, because he wouldn't want to feel like he was cheating on the love of his life. And she would be okay with it, because even if she'd miss the sex, at least they'd be dating. At least, until he found out she was Marinette. Which could be never, or could be the next time her miraculous magic timed out and she had nowhere to hide. And then. . .

Then he'd hate her. He might think her a monster for using her intimate knowledge of his feelings to have a relationship with him when he didn't want one. And then she would lose him completely; his love, his friendship, even his good opinion, as both Ladybug _and_ Marinette.

No matter what she did, she would probably lose him in the end. But. . . it could be enough to have him while she could.

However she could, even if it was just as Ladybug. It was just. . .

"It's _wrong_ , Marinette," Tikki glowered at her chosen from where she hovered over her desk. "You know it is."

"How could it be wrong? I'd be giving him what he wants!"

For someone who usually so cheerful, the kwami had quite the impressive bitch face. "You'd be giving him what he _thinks_ he wants, while keeping the truth to yourself."

Marinette felt herself flush. She had already reached that conclusion, but that didn't mean she wanted to be called out on it. "Oh, so now you want me to tell him my identity?"

"I didn't want you to sleep with him, since when does my opinion matter to you at all?"

She flinched at the kwami's sharp tone. Marinette knew Tikki was right. She had been willfully ignoring the luck god's words of wisdom for the past five months because she knew, deep down, that Tikki was right. It had been a foolish, dangerous idea that she should have put a stop to after the first time.

Tikki had only ever wanted what was best for her, even when it wasn't what Marinette herself wanted.

"I know I haven't been the best. . . _anything_ recently. I don't mean to ignore you, I've just been happy, really happy, and I just. . . wanted to keep that."

Marinette had been right. Love was stupid. It made you stupid. That didn't mean she didn't want it.

The kwami sighed and landed on her shoulder, "I'm not saying you shouldn't be happy. Of course I want you to be happy! I just want you to make sure this is what you really want."

The designer frowned petulantly, "What is that supposed to mean?"

"I am very old, Marinette. I have seen humanity grow, I have watched over many Ladybugs. It has become apparent to me that sex can occasionally muddle people's minds. Sometimes, when they say 'I love you,' what they really mean is 'I love having sex with you.'"

Marinette gasped indignantly, "I know what I feel! I can tell the difference between wanting sex and love!"

"Really? Because a month ago, you were calling Adrien the love of your life."

"I -"

Okay, that was true, but it was only because she had genuinely believed that was the case. Not that she could admit that, since Tikki would consider that proof that she didn't know her own heart. She _did_ , though. She wasn't confused or being fickle. Both Adrien and Chat had a place in her heart, and without even realizing it, Chat had simply taken up more of it.

"I'm not trying to be mean," Tikki patted her cheek and settled comfortably on her shoulder. "I just want you to be absolutely sure before you do something you can't come back from."

"I know," Marinette admitted. "But I - I _do_ love Chat. I know I do. And I want to be with him, like a girlfriend, not just _with_ him."

She could feel Tikki hum against her skin, "Well, if you really love him, then I suppose he can be trusted with your identity."

Tikki yelped when she was dislodged off Marinette's shoulder as the girl stood quickly and began to pace.

"I don't want to tell him my identity! He doesn't love Marinette, he loves Ladybug! I want to confess as Ladybug!"

"If he doesn't love you for who you are, then he doesn't deserve to be with you!"

Marinette bit down on her lip to keep from screaming in frustration, "Why does everybody keep saying that?"

"Because it's true," Tikki deadpanned.

A glaring contest began between the two occupants of Marinette's room. Deep down, Marinette knew Tikki and her mother were right, but she had a very unique opportunity here. If she couldn't be with her love as one identity, then she could be with him as her second identity. Even if it was a little disingenuous, at the end of the day _everybody would be happy!_

Temporarily. Whatever.

Chat hadn't shown up in a few days, and Marinette could only assume it was because he had something complex planned for their non-date tomorrow. She could wait until then, face her fears and confess as Marinette, and hope for the best. She could say nothing and continue on as they were for however long they would be together. But she had told Alya she would confess, and she genuinely wanted to.

She could do the rational thing, the honest thing, and wait to confess as herself tomorrow.

Or, she could do the smart thing, the thing most likely to get her the results she desired, and confess as Ladybug right now.

"Tikki," she was lucky the kwami's glare couldn't actually set her on fire. "Spots on!"

* * *

The sun had only just set, but the night air was quickly cooling. It stung her cheeks as she swung above the rooftops, making her way to the generally abandoned apartment complex the miraculous holders met up on for patrols. She had considered going to the Eiffel Tower, it was more romantic and it was where she used to meet up with Chat when it was just the two of them, but decided it was too public. There were always tourists lingering there, and the zooming feature on cameras only kept improving.

It wasn't surprising to see that Chat was transformed when she tried to contact him through her yo-yo. She ignored the voice in the back of her head that wondered why he hadn't gone to see Marinette if he was able and sent him a message asking him to meet her, not trusting herself to keep her voice steady in a call.

Her nerves were so high strung that it felt like she was vibrating. Why was she so nervous? Was she afraid that he would reject her? _Don't be ridiculous. A yes is practically guaranteed!_

Was it because of what Tikki said? She didn't need the kwami to tell her it was dishonest, it was the fear that it wouldn't make her happy that caused her stomach twist. Could she really be happy knowing that he didn't want her for who she was?

 _Yes,_ she insisted to herself. She had to be, she would be. She'd _make_ herself happy.

"What's up, My Lady," Chat's voice sounded from behind her as he landed on the roof. "Not that I'm not pleased to see you, but you never call just to hang out."

Ladybug turned to face him, taking courage from his carefree tone. He was happy to see her, of course he was.

"I - I wanted," she cut herself off, angry at herself. She was acting like Marinette, and she wasn't Marinette right now, she was Ladybug! Ladybug didn't stutter or get nervous. She was brave. She was fearless. She could confess her feelings without fear of rejection.

Ladybug took a deep breath, "I love you."

Silence. Chat stared at her with a hollow look on his face. Shouldn't he look happier?

 _He must be in shock._ Yeah, that was it. "I know this must seem sudden, but the akuma from yesterday - my dream, it was you. I love you and I want to be with you."

Chat didn't so much as blink. He just stared at her, jaw a little open, face a little pale. _Why_ wasn't he saying anything?

"I'm sorry it took me so long to recognize my feelings for what they were! I don't mean to sound like it was just the akuma attack that made me want you. I've loved you for a very long time, I just -"

"My Lady," Chat interrupted. Why did he look so sad? He should be happy. He should be taking her into his arms and kissing her and telling her he loved her too. Why did his face look pinched as if he was in pain?

His mouth twitched as if he tried to smile but failed. "I've dreamed of you saying those words for so long." That sounded more like what she expected, except his words sounded unbearably heavy. "If only you had said them a little bit earlier."

 _Wait, no._

"I'm sorry, My Lady," and it really did look like it pained him to say the words. "I don't love you like that anymore."

 _But you love Ladybug. You always have. You said you always would._ It didn't feel like she was breathing. How could he not love her anymore? What could happen in the span of a few days to make him give him up on his long-time love? It was even more ridiculous than her giving up on Adrien! And _he_ was the reason that she finally moved on. . .

Her heart sped up as she considered the possibility that maybe he _did_ love Marinette. Maybe, just like her, it had taken physical intimacy to make him realize that the person he wanted was the one that had been beside him the entire time. Maybe she had finally found somebody that could love her for everything she was.

 _Please._

"Is there somebody else?"

 _Please. Please just say yes._

Chat looked down at the roof, "No. No, there's never been anybody else. I just. . . got tired of waiting, I guess."

It felt like her blood froze in her veins. It felt like the world had suddenly stopped spinning. It felt like her heart had stopped beating. How many times could it feel like her heart was being stabbed before it gave out?

 _Oh, now I know._

"I - I'm sorry, this was stupid," she pulled out her yo-yo and walked to the edge of the roof. For a moment she fancied that it wouldn't even hurt if she just stepped off.

"Ladybug, wait!"

She could hear him take a step towards her, "Don't!" She didn't want his pity. She didn't want his kindness. She just wanted to be as far from him as possible. "You don't need to say anything else. I was stupid, I was late, now we move on."

"Will you be okay?" His genuine concern rankled her.

"Of course, I'm Ladybug." Ladybug was perfect. Ladybug was loved. Everybody wanted Ladybug. Everybody except the one she wanted.

Her wrist snapped out and released the yo-yo half a second after she stepped off the roof. She wasn't sure where she was going, and it wasn't long before her feet touched the ground and she dropped her transformation, uncaring of who was watching. It was lucky that she landed in an alley.

Marinette wondered idly if Tikki had somehow been guiding her when a quick look around revealed she was a few blocks away from Alya's house. She quickly made her way to her best friend's apartment and knocked on the door. She didn't worry about how she would explain to her parents her exit from the apartment, that was a problem for a later hour. Right now, she just wanted to spend time with the only person that knew even the smallest detail of why she felt so broken.

"Marinette?" Alya asked curiously.

A sob bubbled up out of her throat, "He didn't like me back."

The brunette stared for a moment before she made a soothing sound and guided the petite girl in through the door.

"I'm so sorry," she pulled her into a hug. Alya sounded sincere even though she had only known about Marinette's feelings for less than a full day.

"Mari?" Nino's voice jolted her from the soothing hug.

She pulled back and blinked at the DJ and then at her best friend. "I'm sorry, it's late and I obviously interrupted something. I'll just go."

"Don't be ridiculous," Alya said at the same time Nino told her, "Dude, you're not going anywhere looking that wrecked."

Marinette didn't really want to be around the perfect puzzle pieces that found their forever love at the age of thirteen. But they were her friends, and she wanted comfort. Her body ached worse than it did after her longest akuma fight.

"If you don't mind," she muttered shyly, looking at the ground.

"Oh no! You're not doing that!" Alya chided, nostrils flaring angrily. "You're not letting some boy destroy your self-esteem. I'll kick his ass myself if he said anything to make you feel inferior!"

"Wait, boy?" Nino sounded as if they had just told him the sky was actually green!

Marinette couldn't even find the energy to be mad at Alya. At least this proved she was actually going to wait to tell him, "He didn't say anything, he just didn't want me."

"Wait, what boy? What happened to Adrien?"

"Babe, really not the time!"

* * *

Alya had been gracious enough to let Marinette use her as an excuse. She went so far as to type up the text Marinette sent to her parents informing them she had to stay overnight because Alya was having a meltdown and needed her best friend by her side. She even got up twice as early so she could walk with the designer to pick up her supplies for school the next day.

Marinette tried her best to act strong, especially after all the effort Alya and Nino went to trying to make her feel better. But all she had to do was open her agenda and see the little five she had marked as a reminder and she had to run to the bathroom so that no one would see her burst into tears.

It was the quickest day of school she'd ever had. She couldn't remember a single word that was said.

Absentmindedly, she assured Alya she would be okay and made her way home, heading straight to her room.

As time passed, Marinette began to wonder what she would do when Chat showed up. Would she pretend everything was fine and go along with whatever non-date he had planned? It's really not fair, she thought despairingly, that he could come up with such wonderful ideas that were practically pulled from every little girl's love fantasy when he didn't feel anything at all for her.

Could she pretend that everything was fine? She had thought once that she wouldn't care what he did during the day, as long as he came back to her at night. But that was when she had the quiet hope that he could feel something for her too. Now she had heard from his own mouth that what they had didn't mean anything, that it wasn't even worth mentioning.

There was never anybody else, he had told Ladybug. Even when he got over his first love no one had managed to take her place. The only thing having sex with Marinette had served to do was prove to him that he didn't need love to find pleasure. All the love she had allowed herself to believe had grown between them was just revenge on his unrequited love. And it was all her fault. She had pushed away her own love and now she was suffering for it.

"I can't," she realized. She couldn't pretend that nothing had happened. She couldn't smile and kiss him and go along with whatever he had planned. She had never been that good of an actress, and she was sure that she wouldn't even be able to look him in the eyes without bursting into tears.

She should have just stayed quiet. She should have remained content with what she had. She should know better by now than to try to have more than what she was given. It was hardly ever decided that she actually deserved it.

Decision made, Marinette forced herself to her feet and to her balcony, not willing to let him into her room. Once, she had hoped they could remain close friends after they ended their arrangement, but now she doubted she'd be able to bear even that. It _hurt_ to know that he had never so much as considered her, and maybe one day she'd be able to get past that, but right now her heart ached to think of him.

The sun went down and the stars blanketed the sky as she sat on her recliner. And even though her fingers grew numb and the tip of her nose grew rosy, she didn't feel any of it.

When Chat landed on the balcony with a bouquet of red chrysanthemums and white jasmine, she rose to her feet and leaned against the railing, keeping him in her peripheral vision.

"Good evening, Princess," he bowed deeply before holding the bouquet out to her. "I hope you've been well."

 _Don't look, don't look!_ She bit her lip, wondering how she should respond. Should she just come out and say it? That hadn't worked out too well for her last time. Not that it could get any worse at this point.

"I'm fine," she forced out.

Chat didn't seem to notice that she was giving him the cold shoulder as he came to lean on the railing beside her. When he spoke, she could hear a smile in his voice, and she closed her eyes so that she wouldn't see it. "Do you remember what day it is? Because I have something really special planned."

Marinette took a deep breath and blurted out the first thing that came to her mind, "I've been thinking about what you said last time. About dating."

"Really? Because I -"

"So, I think," she interrupted, not wanting to hear what he thought about dating. "We need to stop this because I can't date someone while sleeping with you."

There was nothing but silence and Marinette got a serious case of déjà vu. Chat was standing so still she couldn't be sure he was breathing, but she used all her strength to not turn to him. If she looked him in the eyes, she would admit that she wanted to be with him.

Instead, she turned towards her skylight, "I'm sorry if it seems like I'm springing this on you out of nowhere. I've just had a lot of time to think."

"Wait," Chat spun her around to face him and gripped her arms almost painfully. She forced herself to look at his chest. "That's not what I meant!"

"Well, it's what I want," her voice was trembling and she hated herself for it.

"But you said - you said you wanted me."

It wasn't fair that the hurt in his voice caused her pain. It wasn't fair that she still cared so much about making him happy. It wasn't fair that she could almost convince herself that he actually wanted to be with her. She shrugged his arms off and placed one foot on the entrance to her room. "I changed my mind. It's not enough for me anymore, I want something more and you can't give it to me."

It's just the sex he would miss, she reminded herself, and began descending down the steps.

"Marinette, please, wait! Just talk to me!"

"No!" Her stubbornness was the only thing keeping her from bursting into tears. She blindly reached up to grab the hatch. "I hope - I hope we can still be friends, but I just can't right now."

She slammed it shut and then closed the shutters, locking him out completely. Marinette made it all the way to her bed before the tears began spilling, but she kept a hand over her mouth to keep from sobbing just in case he was still on the balcony.

She sincerely hoped he wasn't. She knew herself, and she knew that if he knocked on the skylight, if he asked to talk, if he said he was willing to give a relationship with her a try, she would accept it in a heartbeat. Even knowing deep down that what he wanted to keep was the sex and not her. She'd destroy herself to keep him.

Despite that, she still strained her ears to listen for the lightest of knocks or the faintest call of her name. But it never came.

* * *

 **A/N:** It's going to get worse before it gets better, **but it _will_ get better**. In my defense, Marinette sabotaging herself is the most in character thing ever. And **I promise there's a reason** why Chat said what he did, but I can't tell you because of plot. This was borderline painful for me to write, and it probably shows, it's not my best work.

If anybody on this show knows about **the language of flowers** , it's Adrien. And maybe Rose. White jasmines mean "sweet love", while red chrysanthemums mean "I love you."

This chapter's title doesn't come from a song, it comes from the fact that I pictured **Alfred Pennyworth** telling me I just want to watch the world burn as I wrote this, and I was like YASSS.

As always, let me know what you liked, didn't like, and what you thought could use improvement!

~ Destiny's Sweet Melody


	15. It's Not In Me To Forget You

**A/N:** My favorite headcanon is that even though Tikki is super sweet, and Plagg is sarcastic and lazy, they will both turn on destroy mode if you mess with their babies. Which would make things interesting if their babies were hurting each other.

There was another small spike in reviews, and I'm glad that we're all still liking the drama! lol But, **to be honest** , it's probably not going to last _too_ long.

 **To KwibKwib:** I promise that there's a (in my opinion, at least) logical/excusable reason for why he lied. Just have to wait _one_ more chapter to find out what it is!

 **To I Made A Review:** lol, good, my job is done.

 **To Guest:** Thank you, I'm glad you like the story!

* * *

 **All Your Love Is Revenge**

 **Ch. 15: It's Not In Me To Forget You**

When Marinette woke up, she was clutching Chat's quilt like a security blanket. She sincerely considered laying in bed all day, trying to inhale what was left of his scent and, amazingly, Tikki didn't try to stop her. The kwami just sat beside her head on the pillow, big, blue eyes filled with sympathy. In the end, it was her phone beeping to remind her to take her pill that got her out of bed. She supposed she didn't need them anymore, but she had already refilled her prescription and it was something to do.

Almost mechanically, she got out of bed and went through her morning routine, taking her pill, showering, and getting dressed. She was halfway through slipping a shirt on over her head before she realized it was the same shade of green as Chat's eyes and she ripped it off. Pink had always been her fallback, but he had always said she looked great in pink and she had to physically stop herself from throwing out every pink article of clothing she owned.

She settled on white, a nice, neutral color.

Her eyes were still puffy and her pigtails were a little askew, but she had dabbed some makeup under her eyes and she knew she wasn't going to get any better. Her parents expressed concern when they saw her, but she waved off their worry, telling them she felt a bit under the weather but not bad enough to miss school.

Marinette had always had the tendency to run away from her problems, but she refused to do so now. Besides, even if she was almost one hundred percent certain Chat went to her school, she had no idea who he was under the mask, and didn't have to worry about running into him.

It was her friends that she was dreading seeing most. She had been able to put on a brave face yesterday, and now she was going to show up looking like she had been told her beloved pet had gotten hit by a car. It wasn't like she could explain that she'd had to end things with him a second time! Ugh, maybe she should tell Alya about sleeping with him. She seemed to accept that Marinette wasn't going to tell her a name - she was considerate enough to not cause the blue haired girl more pain in the pursuit of truth - so maybe she'd accept the rest without asking for more details.

Except, if she implied that he had told her he didn't love her and then came back the next day expecting sex, Alya would think he was the scum of the earth. Even if she didn't know it was Chat Noir, Marinette would still feel guilty that she'd cause anybody to think that badly of him - the vaguest idea of him - just because she couldn't keep a secret. She had known what she was getting into when she invited him into her room, and she knew the secrets and lies would just pile up when she started sleeping with him. Now she had to deal with it.

"You okay?" Alya asked her when she sat beside her in class.

Marinette nodded with the smallest of smiles, despite the fact that she was obviously not okay. She had never really had to deal with loss at any point of her life. Two of her grandparents had died before she was even born, and any other failing relatives lived far enough away that they were practically fairytales in her childish head. Master Fu had disappeared after passing on the turtle miraculous to Carapace, but she had never found out what actually happened to him and she could pretend that he was just on an extended vacation somewhere. He certainly deserved it after being the Grand Guardian for over a century.

Chat's rejection and subsequent departure was the first time she had to face a real loss. Part of her believed she wouldn't ever see him again as Marinette. He had given up so quickly! It wasn't that she was childish enough to want him to fight to be with her, but she would have appreciated any excuse to take him back. He didn't need to fight hard. All he would have had to do was say, "Why not continue sleeping with me until you find somebody to date?" and she would have!

God, she was pitiful! What had happened to her that made her so desperate for affection that she would take scraps as if that were all she deserved? Well, being bullied for most of her formative years by Chloé probably had something to do with it.

Marinette had a good life. She had loving parents, good friends, and classmates that had cared enough to stand up to an akuma once to protect her. There wasn't any reason for her to act like she was desperate for love. It shouldn't feel like her world was ending, like she would gladly ride into a town that she had already escaped when she knew there were a dozen guns waiting to rain bullets down on her.

She was glad that there was only a week before she had to turn in her literature paper and she didn't have time to rewrite it. She didn't have the willpower to admit it on paper, but it turned out Bess and the highwayman were right. Love wasn't stupid, it was lethal. Bullets would hurt less than knowing she'd never see him again, that she had ruined everything in every conceivable way. She wouldn't be surprised if he avoided Ladybug as much as possible after embarrassing herself the way she did.

"Want another girls night?" Alya rubbed her back soothingly.

"No," her voice was little more than a whisper. She knew it would only make her best friend even angrier. Alya had been the first one to teach her how to stand up for herself, and she had been the one cheering her on every step of the way for the past four and a half years. Marinette knew that every second she spent moping only caused Alya to hate the "mystery boy" even more, but she didn't want to rely on Alya. She had already done more than enough for her. "I'm doing better, _really._ "

She really did intend to get over it. There was no reason for her to be so heartbroken over a relationship that never existed and she knew it. She tried to focus on more consequential things, like the fact that Nino was worried because Adrien was missing and it wasn't due to his job.

It was just difficult. Sometimes, it felt like she was holding her head underwater, everything seemed distant and gauzy and far away.

The next day was easier, words and vision became clearer, and she could at least remember what it was she had studied in class. Her mind was clear enough for her to notice that Adrien looked the worst she had ever seen him, clothes rumpled, hair messy, and with bags under his eyes. When she tried to ask him about it he flinched away from her and insisted it was nothing. Nino only shrugged, indicating that the blond wasn't willing to speak about it even to his best friend.

Marinette wanted to be a good friend and insist, but it wasn't like she was in any state to offer comfort to anyone else.

On the third day, she asked Alya for a favor during their lunch break. It was just the two of them, Nino having decided that he was going to get to the bottom of whatever was messing with Adrien's head.

"We can't have both of you being miserable," he had explained. Alya had smacked him upside the head for his callous words and their resulting argument was _almost_ enough to make Marinette laugh.

"You want me to what?" the blogger blinked, mouth hanging open in a little o shape.

Marinette tugged at the sleeve of her pale yellow shirt that did not in any way remind her of Chat's hair. Seriously, his hair was shiny and golden and not at all like her shirt, that was why she was wearing it. She was quickly running out of clothes to wear that didn't make her feel like she was drowning in melancholy. When it came to sleepwear, she was down to a ratty, oversized T-shirt that she hadn't worn in two years.

She had decided to create a new pajama set, and had already sketched out the design for five more. Since she couldn't keep calling herself a fashionista with such a limited wardrobe, she then began sketching out an entire spring line. She had never been so inspired! They said artists were always at their most creative when they were suffering, Marinette was inclined to believe that.

 _Silver linings, I guess._

"I want you to help me date."

Alya's mouth moved without making a sound a few times before she frowned. "Are you sure? I mean, isn't it a bit too soon?"

"Honestly, that's _why_ I want to date," Marinette explained slowly. It made more sense in her head. "I don't want to stay clinging to the idea of what could have been." What _was_ , she insisted quietly. Even if he never loved her, they had shared an intimacy that was rare even for long-time couples. She had thought the way they were was similar to what her parents shared even before they started having sex. It was real, even if it wasn't romantic. "I guess I want to prove to myself I can move on."

"You're on the right track, but don't you think rushing into another relationship could be bad?"

"I don't want a relationship," she admitted. It would be years before she could trust another person with her everything the way she had trusted Chat, and part of her doubted she ever would. "Just casual dating. Don't you think it's weird? I'm eighteen and I've never been on a real date. Unless you count Evillustrator."

"Nobody counts Evillustrator," Alya responded with a wry twist to her mouth. "And I've already told you, everybody is different. You can have your first date at ten or twenty or thirty. It's not a contest, girl."

"I know that," really, she did. "But I _want_ to try. Will you please help me?"

For a moment, Alya just stared and she was sure she would say no, but then she just sighed and stabbed a cherry tomato with a fork. "Okay, do you have anybody in mind? Wanna try with Adrien one last time?"

Marinette blushed fiercely, "No, not him." A part of her still felt like she had betrayed him by getting over him so suddenly. Another part didn't want to feel like she was settling for him - and that was shocking, that she might be _settling_ for _Adrien Agreste_ \- and yet another didn't think she had a chance with him even now. She wasn't ready for another rejection so soon.

"I'd rather try somebody that I don't have any sort of romantic history with. Something completely casual. A practice date, if you will."

Alya cupped her chin thoughtfully, "What about Nathanaёl? He doesn't have a crush on you anymore, but he still thinks you're cute! He'd probably agree."

Marinette shook her head, "No, that's still a sort of history." The last thing she wanted was to cause the same kind of turmoil in him that Chat caused in her.

"Well, Nino and Ivan are taken. Max doesn't really date. That's basically all the nice guys in our class rejected already. Unless you want to try the girls, I guess we'd have to try in the other classes."

A sudden thought came to Marinette, and before she could help herself she said, "Kim."

Alya's jaw was hanging open again. "Excuse me?"

"I want to ask Kim."

"Are you kidding me? Kim's so macho and clueless when it comes to romance! And have we forgotten how he humiliated you in class?"

"Kim's a little dumb, but he's not mean," she defended. "Besides, Chloé started it. I trust Kim as a friend, and I don't have to worry about him getting the wrong idea. If I told him I wanted him to be my practice date, he'd probably laugh and agree."

The brown eyed girl chewed on her lip, obviously considering her reasoning. Honestly, what made her think of him was the fact that he had been right all those months ago. They were the same. Hopelessly in love with people they couldn't be with, and instead of wasting away pining, they decided to get out there and experience all the world had to offer.

"That's true," the blogger conceded. "Alright, I'll help you ask him so that we have some ground rules set up before your date."

"You got it, mom."

"Hey!"

* * *

Marinette had been on her way to class after a bathroom break, when she decided to check on Tikki for a reason she couldn't even remember anymore, only to realize that the kwami was no longer in her purse. Panic flowing through her, she turned back the way she came, hoping that the tiny being had only fallen out of the purse and was waiting patiently for her chosen and that nobody had found her.

A distinctly masculine voice was ringing in the girls' lavatory when Marinette pushed the door open.

"If you don't tell her to tell him then I will do it myse - _glurgh!_ "

It took a moment for Marinette to understand what she was seeing. There was Tikki, standing under the running water of a sink, her tiny foot grinding into the back of a small, black _thing_. A thing that talked and squirmed and gasped for breath. He was being held in place right over the drain, causing the sink to fill with water and him to subsequently drown.

"Tikki!" Marinette shrieked in horror, rushing over to pluck the being out of the sink. A kwami, she realized. A black, cat-like kwami. Her breath left her as the kwami sat on her palm heaving for air. "You're Chat Noir's kwami. You're Plagg."

Plagg frowned up at her, "I am aware."

"Don't talk to him!" Tikki interrupted before flying right into the other kwami's face. "You're not supposed to talk to her!"

"Oh, really? I don't remember that rule," there was something spiteful in his tone. "It seems to me like things would be easier if there was more talking. But I guess you've been teaching her that she should shut doors in people's faces."

Marinette flinched as if he had slapped her. It had been wrong of her to run away and not even let Chat say his piece, but she wanted. . . to not want what she wanted. If she let him speak, she would be right back where she started. Pining after a handsome blond that had no romantic interest in her.

She opened her mouth to apologize, before she realized what was happening. This was Chat Noir's kwami. He was talking to Ladybug's kwami. He knew that Tikki was _her_ kwami. "You know I'm Ladybug?"

Plagg gave her the most unimpressed look she had ever seen. "Of course I do, I have for years. Besides, what did you think I did while you were fooling around with Chat Noir? Listen to you rut? No, I was with Tikki."

Marinette flushed at the reminder that there had been not one but two witnesses to her every tryst with Chat. It was easy enough to forget in the moment, when everything was dark and she could only focus on his skin and his hands and his mouth. _Oh no, don't think about that right now!_ Not now that she was holding the cat kwami in her hands and he was looking at her like he knew exactly what she was thinking of and he was judging her super hard for it.

 _Can't I have just one good day?_

"Wait, does Chat know?" The idea that he knew just how horrible she was made her heart stop. She was fine with him not loving her, but she couldn't live with him hating her.

"Of course not, I remember that rule, at least."

"Then why are you wasting your time with empty threats?" Tikki growled. Marinette didn't even know she could growl.

"They're not empty! If nothing changes, then I'll change it myself!" Plagg flew up to hover over Tikki.

Not to be outdone, Tikki rose higher in the air so that they were nose to nose. "Things wouldn't be this way, if your chosen wasn't a pathological liar!"

"Oh, you're going to talk about lying chosen? Which chosen was the one that said they should sleep together because they didn't love each other, only to turn around and say she loved him? And not even as herself!"

"She only did that because he ignored her for _years!_ This wouldn't have happened if your chosen could have just pulled his head out of his ass!"

"This wouldn't have happened if your chosen wasn't some kind of sexed up strumpet!"

Tikki gasped as if it had been _her_ honor he insulted, "You take that back!"

Marinette grabbed onto Tikki before she could launch herself at the bad luck kwami. "Stop it! Just - it's my fault, okay? I know it's my fault, and now I have to pay for it. I'm sorry." Her shoulders slumped as she sighed, "Please tell him I'm sorry."

Plagg frowned at her but didn't seem so filled with righteous fury anymore. "That boy has so many abandonment issues, you can't even imagine. And this is just making it worse." Tikki struggled as he floated towards Marinette, but she clenched her fist in warning and the red kwami stopped. "He always thought you'd be there for him, and then, overnight, you were gone. Do you understand how he feels right now?"

Marinette's throat tightened with unshed tears, but she didn't let them fall. She was sure the kwami wouldn't be pleased with them, "I'm sorry."

"Yeah, I got that," he snapped. "Human emotions are none of my business, I think they're stupid and unnecessary, but I understand that none of you can help it. He _needs_ you. If you actually loved him, you wouldn't have shut him out."

"I do love him," she persisted desperately. "It just hurt to not be loved back."

Plagg made a disgusted sound, "See? Stupid."

"I told him I still wanted to be his friend. Tell him he can come back to see me!" Marinette didn't entirely trust herself to not end up in bed with him again, but if he was actually suffering because of their lost friendship, then she'd deal with it.

"He's not going to believe _me_."

"How am I supposed to contact him as Marinette, then?" Somehow, she doubted he would react well to a text.

"I don't know. Jump off a building or something so that he has to save you."

In the ensuing silence Tikki cried, "Don't you _dare_ jump off a building to get his attention!"

Marinette blushed, her tongue tied as she realized that, for a second there, she had genuinely considered jumping off a building just to talk to Chat.

"What did I tell you?" Plagg drawled. "Stupid."

* * *

Marinette had been correct in regards to Kim. When asked to be her practice date, he had gleefully agreed and made a joke about how he should pop every girl's dating cherry. And then, after Alya had chased him with a textbook, had agreed to be a perfect gentleman. On Saturday afternoon, he knocked on her apartment door and took her out.

Her mother had arched an eyebrow, but she only shook her head. No reason for her maman to think Kim was the person she was crying over just a week ago.

Marinette grabbed onto Kim's arm as they walked towards the movie theater, and giggled at the height difference. She was shorter than most people, even Rose and Alix left her behind as puberty hit, but Kim towered over everybody except Ivan. Even in her heels, she didn't so much as reach his shoulders! She had always thought she was the perfect size for cuddling with Chat, since she could tuck herself so securely into his arms.

 _Stop!_ The whole point of this date was to stop thinking about Chat, not remember him. Or at least stop thinking about him romantically. She was going to have to think about him if she wanted to recover their friendship.

Kim bought her popcorn and chocolates in the theater, and made enough jokes during the movie to keep her entertained but not so much as to make her annoyed. Afterwards he took her to a fine dining experience of burgers and fries at the nearest fast food joint, before finishing off the evening taking her to a basketball court where he easily trounced her. Marinette managed to make six points, which Kim said was better than most of his dates, and was especially impressive since she was in heels.

It was certainly an experience. It was a first date she could brag about in the future. She still couldn't help but compare it to her non-dates with Chat.

Marinette knew she shouldn't, that she wouldn't be helping anyone by clinging to those memories as if they meant anything more than what they were. Chat had taken her out in the same way Kim had. As a friend. He had just wanted to do something special because he tended to be a little over the top in everything. It was an endearing trait most of the time, but in this case, it had set the bar far too high for her dating life.

"So, how was your first date?" Kim teased as they reached the bakery.

She felt a smile form despite herself, "It was fun."

"Just fun? I was going for mind blowing."

Marinette laughed genuinely for the first time since before Dreamer's attack. "You'll have to try harder for the next girl."

"Oh, so you're dumping me already?"

She sighed dramatically, "I'm afraid it's just not working out."

"I'm hurt! Do I at least get a kiss goodbye?"

Marinette tapped her chin in mock thought, a smile tugging at her lips. "I suppose. Just a _small_ one, on the cheek!"

"What kind of guy do you think I am? I never kiss on the lips on the first date!"

"A real proper fellow," she joked as he leaned down. Standing on tiptoe, she quickly pecked his cheek. The laughter that had risen to her lips froze suddenly as she saw a figure on her balcony. It was too dark to be sure, but there was really only one person it could be.

Her heart clenched painfully, "I have to go, I'm sorry."

She didn't wait for his response before running into the building and to her apartment. She ignored her papa's warm voice asking her how her date went and launched herself into her room. Instinct was the only reason she managed to close the trapdoor behind her. There were surely speed records broken as she climbed up onto her balcony, that was the only reason she could think of as to why Chat was still there.

Her body froze and her mind followed soon after when she finally set her eyes on him. He didn't look any different, his hair was still messy and his eyes were still the same electric color. He didn't seem like he was suffering because of her friendship, but she supposed some of that could be attributed to the miraculous magic.

Marinette didn't know what to say and the tense silence continued until Chat spoke, "Is that who you've always loved?"

 _What?_

"I -" That hadn't been what she expected. She wasn't sure how to respond, so she fell back on honesty, "No, Kim's just a friend."

" _I'm_ your friend!"

He sounded jealous and she was reminded of her suspicions regarding the amount of friends he had outside the mask, "Yes, you are, but I can have more friends."

Chat clenched his teeth and looked down. He seemed to be having some sort of internal battle, his eyes almost crazed, before he nodded and turned. "I thought you had missed me, so I - I'll just be going now."

Plagg must have told him something despite his insistence to the contrary, she realized. Her heart leapt to her throat when he pulled out his baton. "I did! I did miss you!" She bit down on her tongue before she could scream out that she loved him. That would surely get him to turn back to her, but not in the way she wanted.

It had been enough to get him to stop from jumping off the railing.

"Please," it sounded like she was begging, her voice thick with tears. She couldn't bring herself to care. "Just come inside. We can watch movies. You missed the Friday Night Movie Marathon."

His chin twitched towards his shoulder, as if he was going to look over to her before stopping himself. "I don't -" his back was tense in the way it was during an akuma attack, and she wanted to reach out and soothe it. "Not yet."

He leapt off the balcony without another word and Marinette found herself running to where he had just been standing, the railing digging into her ribs as she leaned her weight against it.

"Chat!" The name was ripped from her in a desperate scream, loud enough for the entire neighborhood to hear, and she didn't care. Her voice was laced with every bit of pain and grief she had been feeling since he rejected Ladybug but he didn't so much as look back.

Sobs shook her frame as he faded from sight and she sank down to her knees. The realization that their friendship had been irrevocably changed hit her all of a sudden, and she cried worse than she ever had before. She cried for the trust and unconditional support she would never get back. She cried for every year she had wasted not acknowledging how much she loved him. She cried for all the dreams she'd ever had, the ones she had once called nightmares, that would never have the chance to become a reality.

Love wasn't stupid, it was lethal, and Marinette was just one more victim in its endless hit list.

* * *

 **A/N:** I've always thought drama caused by _lack_ of communication was a shitty plot device, so here's them actually _trying_ to communicate and STILL messing it up because they think they're having two different conversations.

Next chapter is in Adrien's POV so you'll get to see what's going on in his head and why he's acting the way he is.

This chapter's title is (translated) from **Qué Gano Olvidándote (What Do I Gain Forgetting You) by Reik** which is all about being incapable of getting over your ex. The full lyric is "I tried and failed/ It's not in me to forget you/ I feel you here embracing me."

As always, let me know what you liked, didn't like, and what could use improvement!

~ Destiny's Sweet Melody


	16. Left Him Frozen In The Spring

**A/N:** I finally fit some Ladrien into this fic, I'm so proud of myself! Well, kind-of, sort-of since they think they don't love each other anymore.

 **Sorry this is so late (or early depending on where you live) in the day**. I went to a baseball game and sort of forgot they last like three hours! I should have updated _before_ I went, but what's done is done. And since this is like the first fic I've been able to update on schedule, I decided to post it today instead of tomorrow. It's still technically Wednesday where I live! lol

 **To KwibKwib:** lol well, _you_ said it's in character! But that's actually not the reason, it's not _who_ that's the problem, it's the fact that there's anybody at all. But, the whole Marinette thing wasn't so much that she said it wrong; she purposefully cut him out of her life because she believes that he doesn't care at all about her, so if she confessed he would only stay with her out of pity or cut her off completely anyway.

 **To I Made A Review:** Aww, thank you! That's so sweet!

A _**tiny**_ **warning** for the briefest description of the onset of a panic attack towards the end of the chapter.

* * *

 **All Your Love Is Revenge**

 **Ch. 16: Left Him Frozen in the Spring**

It had only been sixty-one hours, forty-three minutes and twenty-six seconds since Marinette ripped his heart out, when Nino decided to stomp on it. Adrien understood that he was just trying to be a good friend when he forced Adrien to join him at a coffee shop for lunch, but all he wanted was to lay in bed and fade away. He had tried to do so immediately after Marinette's rejection, willingly missing school for the first time ever, but when the second day rolled around his father threatened to call the doctor to see what was wrong.

Adrien knew heartbreak wasn't going to be a good enough excuse for the doctor or his father. And he couldn't tell Nino either, because it wasn't like he could say "Marinette dumped me" when Nino wasn't aware they were even together. And neither was Marinette for that matter.

Just how together they were, and whether he had any right to be feeling so miserable, was another matter entirely.

"I'm just going to ask this, and I'm going to trust you to tell me the truth," was all the warning Nino gave. "Was there something going on between you and Marinette?"

Adrien froze, wondering if he was just that obvious or if Nino was just that perceptive. He wasn't sure what answer he could give. The honest answer was yes, there was _something_ going on and he was going insane now that it was over, but if Nino tried to help them get over their problems, Marinette would either think he was a liar, delusional, or she would figure out he was Chat Noir.

If she figured out he was Chat Noir he could kiss what little friendship he had left with her as Adrien goodbye. He'd be surprised if she didn't somehow try to press sexual harassment charges.

Nino kept speaking into the stunned silence, "It's just I think you've had a thing for her for a while. I mean, you nearly had an aneurysm when she dressed as Chat Noir, but I brushed it off because anybody can appreciate Mari's ass in leather. But then you kept watching her, and wanting to spend time with her, and I heard you even asked her out once!"

Adrien wasn't really impressed by the ability of gossip to spread through a school anymore. They _had_ been in an open hallway at the time. He should probably be impressed that he hadn't heard of it earlier.

"And it's too weird. Every time she comes into class all blissed out and happy, you look like a love struck idiot. And now that she looks all miserable, you look like somebody just died!"

 _Miserable?_ He hadn't noticed Marinette looking miserable. It had been a little unfair, actually, that he looked like he had rolled out of a dumpster when she was wearing new outfits that she rarely wore, and he was pretty sure she was wearing make-up. The rage he felt when he considered she was dressing up for whoever she wanted to date was the only thing that interrupted the constant melancholy he was feeling.

"It's not like it'd be weird for you guys to be hooking up. The weird thing is that you'd hide it. Just. . . was there something?"

Wouldn't it be weird for them to be hooking up? Marinette only spent time alone with Adrien when forced, and she wasn't the type to sleep with just anyone. She had trusted Chat to provide her with the comfort she needed at the time, and now she didn't need it. He'd done his job well, too well if it was that which had given her the courage to chase after an actual relationship.

Marinette was never going to be with Adrien.

"No," he croaked out, eyes falling to the table.

"Oh," Nino gasped, and when Adrien looked back up at him, his eyes were wide and filled with understanding. "But you _want_ there to be."

So Nino was just _that_ perceptive. Maybe he should be the investigative journalist instead of Alya. Adrien nodded quietly, there was no point in lying about _that._

"Dude, you have the worst timing," Nino informed him, somehow sounding both horrified and amused. "Marinette _just_ confessed to some guy and got her heart broken."

It had only been sixty-one hours, forty-three minutes and twenty-six seconds since Marinette ripped his heart out, but apparently it was still capable of feeling more pain. She _confessed?_ She got rejected? Who _the fuck_ would reject her? She had ended things with him just to get her heart broken by some jerk that couldn't even appreciate her!

He ignored the little thrill that went through him as he considered she might take him back now that she had gotten rejected. He shouldn't be happy she got hurt. _I'm a horrible person._

"I thought it had been you. I mean, Alya kept saying it wasn't but I thought she was just trying to avoid drama, because you're my bro but I've known Mari since forever and I don't think I can forgive even you for making her cry like that."

"She cried?"

Nino nodded, "Like, full on waterfalls of tears."

Adrien understood that Nino was just trying to be a friend, but this was just making him feel worse. He hadn't known she still cared that much about her love. Hadn't she said she was all but over him? That she loved him, but it wasn't love-love. Had that been a lie? Had _everything_ she had told him since they began their arrangement just a lie?

As if sensing his darkening thoughts, Nino quickly spoke, "But maybe this is a good thing! She can get over her mystery guy and in a little bit you can make your move."

Would he really have a chance as Adrien? Could he maybe try again as Chat Noir? Would he really be okay with being her second choice? _Yes,_ he would take anything he could get at this point. Whether as Chat Noir or Adrien, whether her second choice or her one hundredth. All he wanted was to be with her again. Nothing felt real without her.

"Maybe," he agreed quietly. Maybe things could go back to the way they were. Maybe they could even get better. Maybe.

* * *

Things did not, in fact, get better. At least, not for Adrien. It seemed like his pain was inversely proportional to Marinette's joy, and every day that she managed to smile for just a little bit longer was a day that another shard of his soul shriveled and died. Even though whenever he could look at her for longer than a second at a time, he swore her smile, as small as it was, seemed just a little too forced and something in her eyes seemed a little broken.

Plagg was angered by the turn of events, and spent most of his time silently fuming. He had learned really quickly that talking badly of Marinette only made Adrien feel worse. Trash talking was something that scorned lovers did, but Adrien had never been her lover and didn't have the right to feel scorned.

He'd let his hopes and feelings confuse him. She wasn't his lover, she wasn't his girlfriend, she wasn't his mate. If he actually had the intention of claiming her, then he should have just done it, instead of just accepting what they had.

Chat Noir had never been shy about his affections to Ladybug, why hadn't he just declared himself to Marinette?

The thought of Ladybug just made him feel worse. To think he had pursued her for years just to reject her when she finally returned his feelings. He had only realized the depths of his feelings for Marinette a few days earlier, and had been unsure of who he would choose if the situation called for it. . . until the situation presented itself. The moment the words "I want to be with you" left the superheroine's lips, the only thing he could think was that it meant he couldn't be with Marinette anymore.

Of course his gut reaction was to accept! As he had told her, he had literally dreamed of her saying those words for years, but even as she said them all he could think, all he could see, was Marinette. It took all of three seconds for him to realize that suddenly, somehow, the question as to who he loved more wasn't even a question.

Marinette was his mate. Marinette was his love. Marinette was the person he wanted to spend the rest of his life with.

But Ladybug was his first love, and one of his closest friends, and he didn't want to hurt her too much. So when she asked if there was somebody else, he told her no, not wanting to dig the knife of his rejection even further. She knew Marinette, and he doubted she would hate her for it, but it was probably too soon to mention he had found somebody new to love.

There was also the fact that he wasn't sure if she would accept him if he declared himself. Even though he knew she cared, even though she said she wanted him, even though she had said she was over her first love. Evidently, that had been a lie.

It almost felt like karmic justice when Marinette shut him out of her life less than a day after he broke Ladybug's heart. Adrien thought he knew pain. His mother disappearing and his father practically losing his heart were pains that he had been forced to learn to live with - they'd never go away, but he had to continue. Marinette refusing to so much as look him in the eye as she announced her intention to be with other people - anybody other than him - and locking him out of her room was somehow worse.

It never _stopped_. He wasn't sure he could learn to live with this pain, it felt like he couldn't breathe. No matter how hard he tried to get over it, no matter how many times he reminded himself he had gotten rejected by the woman he loved before, no matter how many times he insisted he had no right to feel rejected, it still hurt.

They had always known their arrangement would have to end. What did he expect? For her to be content with being Chat Noir's girlfriend at night, and nobody to him during the day? What woman would accept being treated as a dirty, little secret? If he had even the slightest hope of her reciprocating his feelings as Adrien, then he would have tried to romance her that way. But she had made it clear that she liked Chat Noir more than Adrien, and she didn't like Chat Noir enough to love him.

Plagg switched between insisting that he should just forget about girls completely, and telling him that if he _really_ wanted her, then he should insist on going after her, whether as Chat or Adrien. One day, after disappearing from Adrien's pocket for about an hour during school, Plagg began insisting that he should go see Marinette.

"She _did_ say she wanted to stay friends," he drawled around a wheel of camembert. "She didn't say she never wanted to see Chat Noir ever again. Just go see her. Be her friend. Seduce her. Whatever. Just stop moping."

Adrien wanted to, but he wasn't sure he could handle it. He didn't know if he could look at her, stand beside her, and not drop to his knees and beg her to take him back. They had built a life together the past three years, as strange as it was, and he didn't know if he could go back to living an empty life in his father's desolate mansion. He didn't want to find out.

Still, come Saturday, he finally transformed and hopped on over to her balcony. It was strange to see her bedroom dark and devoid of life. Marinette wasn't much for partying or sleepovers, and after seeing her regularly for the past five months, he had gotten used to her room being filled with laughter and warmth.

All he could do was stare at her closed skylight confusedly until he heard the familiar sound of her sweet laughter. He leaned over the railing just in time to see her stand on tiptoe and kiss a man on the cheek. Chat's hands gripped the railing so tightly he was pretty sure he heard it creak, his vision faded beneath his rage and he was barely aware of Marinette running away from her date.

 _It isn't fair!_ It wasn't fair that she could go out on dates and giggle and kiss while he was too busy trying to figure out how he could Cataclysm his own heart. It wasn't fair! He was suffering! She should be suffering too! Just like -

 _No,_ that wasn't right. If it wasn't for his miraculous, he was sure he would have been akumatized by now. The thought left him nauseated. He could have become a monster, he would have attacked Marinette, all because he didn't get what he wanted. Love was supposed to be precious and kind, and he was turning it into something hateful. Maybe he didn't deserve it.

The skylight creaked open and he turned in time to see Marinette all but throw herself on the balcony. He was peripherally aware that she was wearing heels and stockings beneath a maxi dress, but all he could really focus on was that she was looking at him like his very presence caused her pain. That thought was somehow worse than never seeing her again.

He tried his best to not sound bitter, but somehow the only things to come out of his mouth were accusations. The best thing for him to do was to just leave, especially when she offered to watch movies like they used to and he realized that he didn't want that. He didn't want to go back to the way things were. He wanted more. He wanted to love her, and he wanted her to love him.

He wasn't ready to pretend he wanted anything less. Not yet.

The horrible way she called out his name was still ringing in his ears when he woke up on Sunday. He was almost glad that his father had ordered a photo shoot for the day and he couldn't think about what a terrible person he was. Marinette obviously missed Chat Noir, and he had taken the person she trusted the most in the world away from her because he couldn't look at her without wanting to kiss her.

The princess ring burned against his chest from the chain he had placed it on after failing to give it to her. It was probably a masochistic move, but he wanted it on his person at all times, even knowing he'd have to take it off during work. It was practically the only thing he had left to prove what they had together even existed. He didn't have photos to cry over or love letters to reread and there weren't any marks left on his body. The only thing close to that were the texts she had sent Chat Noir's baton, which meant he couldn't see them whenever he wanted.

Adrien should have known his day would only go from bad to worse when he received a text at ten in the morning from Nino. _Alya might kill Kim. Mari's been crying for like two hours!_

Guilt ate at him, knowing full well that it wasn't her date - and, really, _Kim?_ After he humiliated her for being sexually active? - that had caused her to cry. But he had no choice but to pretend ignorance and send his best wishes.

Everything just went downhill from there. Camila knew him well enough after working with him for six years to know when he was miserable, and, unlike his father, she had a pretty good idea of why he was in his state. Her sympathy and sad eyes only served to infuriate him because _it was his fault_ and he didn't deserve compassion, so he snapped at her when she kept asking him to talk about it. It was fortunate that she was old enough and used to enough emotionally unstable divas that she didn't take offense at his tone.

Genevieve was a different matter. The seventeen year old model was hired to be his partner for the day, and like most female models in his age bracket, she seemed intent on leaving the session with a date. Even if there was no Marinette, he wouldn't have been interested. _This_ was the type of woman that his father kept warning him about. The type that didn't care to get to know him before trying to bed him just because of his name and connections. It was fair play in their profession, and he usually just did his best to ignore any prospective paramours.

Even if there was no Marinette, he wouldn't be interested, but he would have been nicer to her if he wasn't in such a bad mood. Usually, he would smile and gently turn down the most direct of his pursuers. Now, he scowled at Genevieve every time the camera was off him. When her hand "accidentally" drifted below his belt, he grabbed her wrist hard enough to bruise. When she used their close positioning to brush her lips against his neck, he got so upset that he had to take a walk and the photographer called for a break.

All that was bad enough, but the worst came when at a break she came to sit beside him. He was so focused on pretending to be absorbed in his phone - there was no news, only Nino informing him that Marinette insisted Kim had been a perfect gentleman the night before and Alya had called off the assassins - that he didn't see her reach for the necklace hanging off the arm of his chair.

"Pretty," Genevieve cooed and when his eyes flicked over to see what had caught her attention, he saw red.

"What do you think you're doing?" he exploded, jumping out of his chair to tower over her. "That's not yours!"

Genevieve curled in on herself, "I'm sorry."

"Do you always go around touching other people's things?" Adrien was vaguely aware that everyone was staring, but nobody was trying to intercede. Too shocked, probably, that well-mannered, unflappable Adrien Agreste was losing his cool.

He took a step towards her and she jumped out of her chair, taking a few steps back from him, "Why are you being so hateful?"

Her tears would have moved him any other day, but she was still holding Marinette's ring. "Why are you touching my things? Why do you keep annoying me? Why do you insist on coming onto me when I have absolutely zero interest in you?"

His voice rang out in the silence and in his ears, and regret washed over him immediately. He opened his mouth to apologize when he saw the flicker of purple. _No._ The distorted butterfly flew towards her. _No._ It wings fluttered manically around her hand. _No, that's not yours._ The gold chain and bejeweled ring turned an almost inky color. _That's mine. That's Marinette's._ A familiar outline appeared around her face.

"I'm annoying, am I?" Her clothes transformed into a gossamer gown of peach and gold, her skin as pale as marble, her auburn hair suddenly blood red ringlets.

"Genevieve, I -"

"My name is Lovelace," the akuma spoke in a calm voice, hand raised elegantly in front of her. "And all shall adore me and despair."

"Adrien, run!" he was pushed to the ground as Camila took the blast meant for him. Nothing seemed to happen for about three seconds before the older woman suddenly fell to her knees, weeping at Lovelace's beauty and begging for her attention.

Adrien ran, even as he heard more voices begin to cry out in terrified adoration. He needed to find a place to transform, but there were just too many people. They were out in a tourist attraction rather than a studio, and aside from the entire crew, there were a few hundred people that weren't used to akumas and were currently in a mindless panic.

He was pushed from side to side, and briefly to the ground, though he was lucky enough to get up before he was trampled. A swift kick to the side from a heeled foot was the worst of his injuries. He didn't know the area well enough to find an unoccupied quiet place, and it wasn't long before the screams began coalescing in a way that told him Lovelace was approaching him.

Of course she was. He was the reason she was akumatized, she probably wanted him at her feet the most. _Why_ couldn't he just control his emotions? He used to be good at that. For a moment, he had the wild thought that now he knew how Marinette felt whenever she caused an akuma, before shoving the thought away. Clinging so desperately to her memory was what got him into this mess.

"Oh, Adrien," a dulcet voice sang out behind him, and he turned around to see Lovelace only twenty steps away, a small army of devotees prostrated behind her, reaching out for the edges of her gown. "Tell me again what you think of me."

Her arm rose up and dark energy gathered in her palm. He could see the akumatized necklace wrapped around her wrist. Adrien was just about ready to transform in public - he was Chat Noir, damn it, he wasn't going to leave this mess to Ladybug - when a red yo-yo wrapped around Lovelace's wrist and yanked her off the ground.

"My, aren't you the abhorrent admirer?" Ladybug taunted as she came to stand between Adrien and the akuma. "Don't you know guys don't like it when girls are too forward?"

Adrien winced, wondering if she was thinking about getting rejected the one time she made a move.

Lovelace struggled to her feet, "Boys, girls, it doesn't matter. All shall love me!"

"Wow, you're pushy," at least she didn't sound _too_ upset. Ladybug turned to him and smiled, "Hang on and don't panic, please."

He didn't have time to think over her words before she wrapped an arm around his waist and sent her yo-yo upwards. The ground disappeared under him and his stomach swayed as they swung across rooftops. It was disorienting when he wasn't Chat Noir and not in control. He was vaguely reminded of all the times she had carried him like a bride when they were younger and blushed. She was still absurdly strong for someone of her stature, but at least he was now too tall to be a complete damsel.

She gently set him down on a rooftop, "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, just a little guilty," he admitted shamefully.

"Don't be, you're not responsible for anybody else's emotions," she told him easily. Ladybug didn't so much as look at him, instead her eyes were scanning the horizon as if looking for something. There was really only one thing she could be looking for.

"Waiting for Chat Noir?"

Her shoulders slumped at the mention of his alter ego and he felt guilt churn in his gut even more. All he seemed to be doing recently was hurting perfectly innocent girls.

"I thought he'd be here by now. . . at least I hoped he would be." Ladybug's lips pulled into a frown before she shook her head and walked to the edge of the roof, "There are stairs over there, get to safety. I'll take care of this."

"Wait," he called and grabbed her wrist before he could stop himself. She looked surprised at him but didn't say anything. Right, how could he say this without being suspicious? "About Chat Noir, I'm sure he'll be here soon. You guys are like best friends, right?"

Ladybug blinked at him, and then the smallest of smiles appeared on her face. "That's right, we are." She gently tugged her wrist from his grip. "Thank you."

She was gone before he could tell her about the akuma, but it didn't matter. "Plagg, claws out!"

Adrien had created this mess, and Chat Noir was going to fix it. Another part of his soul was going to shrivel and die when he used Cataclysm on the necklace, but at least the Miraculous Ladybug healing wave would fix it.

* * *

Alya was texting him like crazy for an exclusive, and even though he insisted that there wasn't much that he could say he agreed to allow her an interview the next day in school. Marinette also texted him to ask after his health, which warmed his heart and brought a smile to his face. At least she was still friends with Adrien. It was Nino's text that changed the course of the day.

 _I'm DJing at a club tonight. Alya's taking Mari. Come with._

Adrien blinked at the succinct message. _On a Sunday?_

 _I'm not Saturday material yet, bruh._

Adrien snorted, _IDK père won't approve_

 _Live a little!_ Adrien rolled his eyes. That wasn't the best excuse to give to his father. _Listen. I MAY have overheard something I shouldn't have_

He lifted a brow, even though Nino couldn't see it, and sent a simple enough message: _?_

When he read Nino's text, it felt like he'd had the breath yanked out of his lungs: _Mari said - dates are a bust, time for a random hookup_

No. No, no, no. That wasn't possible. Marinette didn't sleep around. She chose Chat Noir because she trusted him. She chose Chat Noir because it meant something.

"Kid, breathe!" Plagg hissed into his ear, and he suddenly realized that he was on his knees. He was glad that he was alone in his room.

His phone vibrated in his hand: _This is your chance dude. BE that hookup!_

Adrien didn't want to be a random hookup. He wanted to be her boyfriend, he wanted to be her lover, her mate, her everything. He wanted her to love him as much as he loved her. But. . . but he would take what he could get. Relationships had to start somewhere, right? Maybe she'd decide she liked Adrien enough to give the whole dating thing a try.

His father was going to be furious, but he would be forced to accept. Adrien had lost a lot to Gabriel's overprotective, controlling nature. He was not going to lose Marinette.

He quickly typed his decision: _I'm going._

* * *

 **A/N:** I hope that I cleared up some things that happened in the last two chapters, and that I kept Adrien believable. We saw in the Christmas Special that he is capable of _wanting_ to commit violence to make himself feel better, but he can't actually pull the trigger. So here, he's snappish, but feels bad about it almost immediately. And I would argue to the death that it's perfectly in character for him to lie to Ladybug because he feels guilty in the same way Marinette feels like she betrayed Adrien despite the fact that they were never together!

 **Adrien is a saint with bad self-esteem** , and Genevieve was actually sexually harassing him. She was very obviously the bad guy in that situation, but since it's in Adrien's POV, I feel it's more in character for him to blame himself.

And Lovelace is a pun on the word Loveless.

This chapter's title comes from **Ex's and Oh's by Elle King** which is the ultimate female Casanova song, I love it! The full lyric is "I had a summer lover down in New Orleans/ Kept him warm in the winter, left him frozen in the spring/ My, my, how the seasons go by." Which is _almost exactly_ what happened in this case, they were at their best in winter and now it's almost spring and they're broken up. I didn't even plan to include any specific dates until I decided to do the Halloween thing, so this was some serendipity.

Let me know what you liked, didn't like, and what you thought could use improvement!

~ Destiny's Sweet Melody


	17. I Just Wanna Keep Calling Your Name

**A/N:** I think I kind-of, sort-of fit all the sides of the Love Square into this chapter.

 **To KwibKwib:** Making things worse is a talent of mine lol. But, it starts getting better from this point! And, it's been like less than a week in story, so give the poor, confused child a break!

 **To Guest 1:** Thank you! I'm glad you like the story! :)

 **To Guest 2:** They're very different people, and its canon that they take (indirect) rejections very differently, so I just ran with that. And I'm glad you sympathize with Adrien, I'm always a bit iffy about writing him.

 **To I Made A Review:** You're the first person to mention her, so for no real reason ( _wink_ ), I'm gonna tell you to hold on to that feeling.

 **A warning** for this chapter: there are TWO cases of guys being creeps to Marinette, but they're brief and the second time they get their asses kicked, so I think it balances out.

* * *

 **All Your Love Is Revenge**

 **Ch. 17: I Just Wanna Keep Calling Your Name**

Marinette wasn't sure when she fell asleep, or how she even got to bed. One moment she was crying on the balcony, and the next she was waking up in bed, the electric green quilt wrapped around her body. She wasn't sure why she was awake so early in the morning after such a miserable night, until her mother's voice called again.

"Marinette, Alya's here!"

Oh right, Alya had told her she would be by first thing in the morning to go over the details of her date. She wished she hadn't meant _literally_ first thing in the morning. A quick glance at the digital clock informed her it was a little after eight.

Marinette sighed and sat up as her trapdoor opened. Alya had a beaming smile on her face as she climbed up to her room, "Hey, girly, how's the dating life?"

The brunette froze when she saw her and Marinette realized she was still wearing the clothes from her date, even her heels were still strapped to her feet. She shrugged off the quilt so that it didn't seem like she was using it as a shield, but knew that she still looked a mess. Her pigtails must be little more than knots, her eyes must be red and puffy, and her cheeks felt sticky with dried tears.

The look on Alya's face was more frightening than most akumas, "What did he do?"

Marinette was surprised she could enunciate so clearly behind clenched teeth. "Nothing," she insisted. She was sure her best friend would be willing to chase after Kim if she thought he did something inappropriate enough to cause this state, and this time a textbook would not be her weapon of choice. "It was - I saw -"

The memory of Chat's departure and the bitterness she felt at being unable to tell anybody about it welled up within her and she burst into a fresh bout of tears. Large, hiccupping sobs that stole her breath, and Alya stopped being angry only to become desperately concerned. The journalist in training ran to the bed and wrapped her arms around the smaller female.

She made soothing noises and tried her best to calm her down, but Marinette could barely hear what she was saying through her sobs. Her parents came up to ask what was wrong, but Alya didn't have any answers for them and any attempts Marinette made to respond only caused her to cry more. They eventually decided it was best to just let her cry herself out and brought water and cookies before heading back down to the apartment. Marinette didn't miss the knowing look in her maman's face, and she could only hope that she understood well enough to not ask her for details.

It wasn't until Nino showed up in her room that she managed to calm down. She was embarrassed to discover that she had been crying on and off for the better part of two hours!

"Don't sweat it, girl," Alya switched from a soothing voice to a determined one. "Kim's going to be crying just as hard in a little bit!"

Nino sighed tiredly, but wisely didn't dissuade his girlfriend's vendetta.

"It wasn't him," Marinette insisted. Maybe her parents were right to let her just cry it out. This time when she thought of Chat refusing to so much as watch movies with her, it hurt but she didn't feel any tears spring to her eyes. "He was nice, I had fun. It was after, when I got home, I saw _something_ that reminded me of. . . him."

She would forever be grateful that Alya was considerate enough to accept her obscure references to the man that broke her heart. And Nino seemed to have decided it was a "girl thing" and didn't push for details.

"Marinette," Alya sighed and rubbed her back. "I know you're hurting, but you have to work through it."

The blue eyed girl frowned at her best friend. _She's just trying to help,_ she reminded herself and breathed deeply. Alya wouldn't be able to understand what she was feeling. Her only serious relationship - hell, her only serious _crush_ \- was Nino. They were still happily together in a stable relationship. Marinette was pretty sure that they'd never even had an actual argument before! Or, if they had, it was resolved quickly enough that no one ever heard of it.

"I know," Marinette agreed. She was right, of course, she _did_ have to get over it. If she wanted to be happy, if she wanted to be friends with Chat again, then she had to work through her feelings until she could ignore them, if not forget them. That had been the point of the date. It was just unfortunate that the moment she tried to take one step forward, Chat had decided to visit her and she ended up dragging herself a thousand steps back.

All three of them decided to spend the day in Marinette's room, watching movies and accepting sweets from her parents when they periodically came up to check on her.

 _I have a good life,_ the designer reminded herself. She could be happy, she could smile, and laugh, and watch movies with friends without being reminded about Friday Night Movie Marathons. Maybe someday she could even find love. A gentle, caring love that wouldn't consume her every thought. Once, she had thought that would be a boring kind of love, but now she knew that fiery passion only left ashes and cinders in the end.

Calm and tender, she could look forward to that. Alya had been right when she said Marinette gave too much of herself to her every single crush. She had spent almost her entire adolescence pining after Adrien, only to realize at the end that she had never really considered what he would be like as a life partner. He was perfect, and she couldn't see past that perfection, but that was unfair to him. Adrien was a person, she knew he couldn't be infallible, but she had never bothered to learn all his little quirks and flaws in her pursuit.

Then she had gone and fallen for Chat Noir without even acknowledging that she had. He was too visceral, too real, too present in her day to day life. Adrien had been a dream, and Chat's jokes, and awkwardness, and tendency to scratch the upholstery couldn't compare. But he was _real_ and she had given him a place in her life that should have been reserved for a spouse, or at the very least, a long time partner.

She had given too much of herself, and she needed to stop doing that. She needed to learn how to hold onto her heart.

* * *

It had been strange to be Ladybug but not quite the same Ladybug. The confidence boost and showmanship that always took over her when she activated her miraculous armor weren't waiting for her. She still felt like the fragile, heartbroken girl that had been crying her eyes out only a few hours earlier. But Adrien was in trouble and she managed to put her own issues aside for his sake. Love of her life or not, he was still her friend, and she'd be damned if she let anything happen to him because she couldn't get out of her own head.

Working with Chat, however, was another story. It was awkward in a way it had never been. Even all the way back with Stoneheart, after a few false starts, they had fallen into an easy rhythm that had defined their partnership. Now it felt like neither of them wanted to be around the other for too long, and they couldn't exchange more than a few words without tripping over them.

Adrien had reminded Ladybug that she and Chat were close friends above all else, but now she wasn't sure. The blond apparently didn't do well with girls that loved him when he didn't love them back.

A Lucky Charm in the form of a hallway mirror to distract Lovelace and a quick Cataclysm to the chain wrapped around her wrist and the akuma was purified. Ladybug wondered how Chat had figured out which was the akumatized object, but didn't question him. She also ignored the way he picked up the chain and held it possessively to his chest before running off with only a quick goodbye.

Ladybug sighed tiredly. _Right_ , it was going to be weird for a while, but she was sure they'd be back to fighting akumas like before faster than he'd be watching movies with Marinette. At the very least there was no sex between Chat and Ladybug to make things even more awkward.

Marinette made it to her room and dropped her transformation with time to spare before Alya and Nino made their way back from recording the akuma attack. The blogger was excitedly texting Adrien, asking for an exclusive, and Marinette took the opportunity to send a quick text asking if he was okay. She knew he was, she was the one that saved him after all, but it wouldn't do to seem uninterested just because she wasn't in love with him anymore. What kind of person would she be?

Around five, Nino suddenly announced that he had to be leaving to get ready for a gig he had that night. When he reached over to kiss Alya's cheek, she grabbed onto his shoulders.

"Can you get us in?" she asked, eyes bright with hope.

"Us?" Marinette asked at the same time Nino shrugged and answered easily, "Sure."

"Yes, us," Alya turned to her with a wicked smirk. "You need to cut loose and have fun!"

That was. . . true. Instead of focusing on dating and proving she could love somebody new, she should focus on having fun and appreciating the love of her friends that she already had. Besides, hadn't she thought once that were it not for Chat she might have lost her virginity in a random hookup in a club? Marinette snickered and Alya cheered as she took that as agreement.

"Sure, let's have fun," she would have to work on actually sounding enthusiastic.

It was apparently enthusiastic enough as Nino smiled and headed towards the trapdoor, cheerfully shouting, "I'll see you guys there!"

He had barely closed the trapdoor before Marinette turned to her best friend and gripped her arm, "I'm going to say something and I want you to not freak out."

Alya blinked at her but nodded.

"This whole dating thing, it's not really working out," she began and held up her hand when Alya opened her mouth to protest. She knew the brunette meant well, but she didn't need kind words, she needed to face reality. And the reality was that she wasn't going to forget about Chat with practice dates and schoolyard romances. "I was thinking, maybe it's time for a random hookup."

Something that sounded vaguely like somebody tripping down the stairs grabbed her attention just before Alya spoke, "Wha - what? You do know what hookup means right?"

Honestly, she wasn't that ignorant! "Sex."

The easy way she said it seemed to unnerve Alya, and she seemed to choke on air, coughing before she could speak. "And that's what you want? You want to lose your virginity to some random person in a club?"

Marinette flushed at both the frank way she said it, and the fact that her best friend _still_ didn't know she was actually quite experienced when it came to sex. Honestly, it was a crime that they couldn't share sex stories. Even now, in the depths of her sorrow, so much as thinking about the nights she spent with Chat was enough to get her hot and bothered. The problem was that she wasn't ever getting those nights back, and she needed to prove to herself that it had nothing to do with him. Sex could be great with anyone; feelings had nothing to do with it!

To be perfectly blunt, to the point of being vulgar, she wanted someone to fuck the memory of Chat Noir out of her.

"It's worth a shot," she shrugged easily.

Alya looked like she might have an aneurysm, "But why? Just to get over some guy? You shouldn't just throw away your virginity like that!"

"You said it wouldn't matter if I was still a virgin," the blue haired girl pointed out. "Why should it matter if I choose to have sex?"

Brown eyes widened, "Oh my god, I have internalized misogyny, don't I?" Alya clutched her cheeks in genuine horror, and seemed to be analyzing her entire life as she mumbled "it's your body, you can do what you want" over and over.

Marinette decided to be merciful, "I understand why you think waiting for the perfect person is best - you already found him! But, not everyone is as lucky as you. I want to prove to myself that I can go out there and have fun and _maybe_ \- I'm not even sure if I'll go through with it - find somebody that I find attractive that finds me attractive too. Does it have something to do with getting my heart broken? Probably, but that doesn't mean it's the _wrong_ choice."

Alya let out a large breath, "Right. You're a big girl and I'm not your mom." She smirked suddenly, "Nino's been telling me I need to stop meddling so much and let you make your own decisions."

The designer laughed, fully aware that she wasn't the best at making her own decisions, "Well, maybe don't stop all your meddling yet!"

* * *

Nino seemed to have overestimated his ability to get them into the cramped club. Marinette wasn't an expert when it came to the Parisian night life, but she hadn't believed Sundays could be so busy. The fact that the club was a small, underground site probably had something to do with it. Alya snorted as she received a text informing them they would have to go in through the back entrance the workers used.

"Not Saturday material, and can't even get us in through the front door," Alya intoned bemusedly. "Why do we even keep him around?"

"Probably because you love him," Marinette smiled from where she was brushing her hair.

"Yeah, I do."

They had made a quick trip to Alya's house for a change of clothes before returning to Marinette's room since she had a more extensive selection of makeup. Alya had chosen a simple outfit of washed out jeans, a platinum colored shirt, and flats, her hair pulled up into a high ponytail. The blogger wasn't trying to attract attention, already having someone that she would happily go home with, and was okay with not receiving more than second glances.

Marinette, on the other hand, had decided to slip on the most provocative articles of clothing she owned. Which wasn't saying much, as she had always preferred to stay under the radar when it came to her body. Still, she was pretty proud of what she managed to throw together on such short notice. Ripped skinny jeans, a tight black shirt with a neckline so low that the little, lace bow in the center of her bra could be clearly seen, and heels, because apparently she has "nice legs for someone so short" according to Kim. Alya had suggested leaving her hair down to give her a don't care air.

Overall, she thought, she would certainly be getting somebody's attention that night. Alya apparently agreed, "If your intention is to get lucky tonight, I think you have a high chance of succeeding."

Marinette giggled somewhat anxiously, almost ruining her make-up by burying her face in her hands as she blushed. This wasn't going to be as easy as just finding someone willing, she knew that, but she was determined to try. A part of her suspected she would chicken out at the last second, but she placed the condom Alya had so graciously offered to her in her purse.

"Let's go before my parents hear you."

Her maman raised a brow at her outfit but punched her husband on the shoulder when he made a move to protest, "Have fun girls."

"We will," Alya answered for them both, Marinette too busy focusing on not fainting from her blush.

"Make good choices," her papa's voice followed them out the door. Marinette whined pathetically. Alya burst out laughing.

Nice legs or no, she regretted the heels by the time they made it to the club. They'd had to take the metro, which meant that they hadn't walked the entire way, but she just wasn't used to them and they pinched! At the very least, she didn't wobble in them. _Small mercies._

Turning the corner and evading the surprisingly long line at the entrance, Marinette froze when she saw somebody already standing at the back entrance. Adrien blinked up at them and then seemed to flush violently, although that may have been the neon red lighting dropping down from the roof.

Alya snickered and nudged her in the side, so Marinette retaliated by elbowing her just a tad bit too heavily. The brunette wheezed behind her as she took the final steps towards the blond, "Hey, Adrien. Surprised to see you here."

"N- Nino invited me. Kind of last minute." She could believe it. He was wearing something very similar to what he wore for school, though she supposed he didn't really need to try too hard to draw attention. Everybody knew who he was, and it would take very little effort to find a dance partner or someone to leave with. Of course, considering Lovelace, he might be _trying_ to stay out of the spotlight.

"Well, I'm glad you're here," she smiled gently.

"Y- yeah, me too."

Marinette didn't have time to wonder why his voice sounded so strange before the door swung open and Nino was hurrying them in. Alya landed a quick peck on her boyfriend's lips before grabbing onto Marinette's arm and squealing in a hushed whisper, "Adrien was totally checking you out."

"He was not," the designer hissed quietly back.

"Girl, he couldn't take his eyes off your little bow."

She tried to think back to their conversation, tried to remember where he was looking. It. . . didn't seem like her eyes. Marinette flushed but elbowed her best friend again, "I told you not him."

"Okay, but imaging telling your grandchildren about losing your virginity to your first love."

"I don't think I'd be telling my grandchildren about my sex life," the designer deadpanned. Even if she followed her parents' example of complete openness, there were some lines that weren't meant to be crossed. Besides, she had lost her virginity to her second love already.

"But just imagine," Alya sing-songed and Marinette sighed and shook her head. Might as well give up on making Alya give up on her and Adrien.

 _She means well,_ she reminded herself. Alya had always wanted Marinette to be happy, to the point that she was willing to support her mysterious second love if that was what the blue haired girl wanted. For reasons that had never been made clear to her, Alya had chosen to love Marinette enough that she acted as if Marinette's happiness was her happiness.

"If I completely strike out, I will consider it," she allowed, already certain that the opportunity would never even present itself.

* * *

She was so wrong! How could she be so wrong? Marinette was getting very tired of being wrong all the time.

It's not that she completely struck out, quite the contrary. It seemed as if she couldn't take a moment to herself before somebody new appeared to ask her to dance or offer her a drink. Marinette knew better than to accept drinks from strangers, but then an Englishman named Gregory started flirting with her at the bar and bought her a drink and she had _seen_ it be made, so, making sure that she had eyes on it at all times, she accepted it. And then another three.

Marinette was not the _best_ drinker. In fact, it would be fair to assume that tonight was the first time she ever drank alcohol. Because it was, it really was, and Alya should never stop meddling because she cannot be trusted to make her own life choices.

The room was already spinning before she started dancing with Gregory, so it was inevitable that she would trip and fall against him. He only laughed at her clumsiness and asked her if she was ready to leave, already tugging her in the direction of the exit.

That was what she wanted, wasn't it? To find somebody to take her somewhere for a quick round of sex. So why did she feel so bad? The nausea was probably because of the drinks, but the guilt! Where was the guilt coming from?

"Wait," she protested weakly. Then a little more strongly when he didn't, "I said wait!"

She dug her heels in the floor and tugged her arm from his grasp with enough strength that she fell against somebody's chest. A tall someone. Arms wrapped familiarly around her waist and her heart was beating so wildly that she couldn't even hear what they were shouting at Gregory, she could only see it made him angry before he turned away with a rude gesture.

 _Chat?_ No, that wasn't possible. There was definitely a cotton sleeve on that arm, and Chat wouldn't approach her untransformed and act so familiarly. It seemed silly to think she could recognize somebody by the way they held her.

"Marinette, are you okay?"

She whipped her head around, wondering who could know her name. "Oh, Adrien." She tried her best to keep the disappointment out of her tone. By the way he flinched, she knew she had failed.

Another thing she had been wrong about was the amount of interest he was showing her. Fine, he was checking out her chest, that was normal, that was the _point_ of the outfit. That didn't mean he was interested! Except, whenever she wasn't being pursued by strangers, Adrien was there offering her a compliment, or some water, or asking her to dance. She didn't even know he liked dancing! If only she had known some skimpy clothing would be enough to get his attention four years ago.

"Let's get out of the way," he said and she went easily when he guided her to what little space wasn't taken up by dancers or tables. It was close to the restrooms, and she had the wild thought that maybe he'd offer to pull her into a stall.

Shaking the thought away, she looked up at him, "Sorry. You know, you don't have to be taking care of me."

"I want to," he told her easily, and she wondered what it would take to make those words drive her crazy again.

It wouldn't be a completely terrible thing to end up with Adrien between her legs before the night was over. Even if it was a bit retroactive. She wanted to move forward, not go back to the beginning. The terrible part was that she didn't really want to. He was attractive to her still, but that was as far as it went. She didn't particularly want to sleep with him. She didn't particularly want to sleep with anybody in this club.

Marinette noticed he still had a grip on her arm and she pulled away, "But you should be having fun, too. I think I'm going to head out soon."

So the night was a bust. Whatever. She had proven to herself that she could have her pick whenever she decided to sleep with someone. But right now whenever she got close to considering somebody, her stomach twisted until she was sure she would retch.

"Wait, please, Marinette," Adrien's voice stopped her before she could take more than half a step. "I just - I wanted to," he mumbled his words and whatever else he was saying was lost under the thundering music of the club. Marinette squinted at him, as if that would help her understand, but she couldn't actually read lips.

When he finished speaking, there was a blush on his cheeks, and he looked at her expectantly. Feeling terrible, she placed a hand next to her ear, "Sorry, I didn't catch that!"

Adrien looked wrecked for a moment, before he shouted something angrily and then gripped her shoulders and pulled her roughly to him, crashing their lips together. Marinette stiffened, startled by the unexpected gesture. Adrien Agreste was kissing her. The thing she had spent most of her adolescence dreaming about was happening! She closed her eyes and allowed herself to relax and respond to the kiss. It felt nice. No, it felt _good!_ It felt warm and soft and familiar. It felt like -

Marinette surprised herself with how violently she shoved him away. Her arms were still outstretched and a flush overtook her when she saw the look he was giving her. He seemed equal parts startled, hurt, and betrayed.

"I - I'm sorry," she heard herself say. Everything was suddenly too much. The sounds, the amount of people, the way her lips still tingled with the sensation of his kiss. "I have to go!"

Spinning on her heel, she headed straight for the door. She would text Alya once she'd had enough fresh air, but she needed to get home _now._ She thought she heard Adrien call out after her, but that only made her walk faster, shoving her way through grinding bodies and ignoring the catcalls that followed her out of the cramped building. What had she been thinking when she dressed like this?

Marinette wasn't sure which way she was walking until she took a turn and realized she had walked right into a dark alley. The sensation of eyes on her made her freeze.

"Look at what just walked right up to us," a greasy voice cooed in the darkness. "All wrapped up with a little bow and everything."

Honestly, fuck this outfit. It was more trouble than it was worth. Marinette's fists clenched as a group of about five men wandered into view. Tikki moved erratically in her purse, but she placed a calming hand over it. Marinette wasn't weak or defenseless. Even without transforming, she was confident she could get out of this unscathed.

"What? Nothing to say?" the ringleader, a brown haired man that barely looked two or three years older than her asked.

"Not to you," she growled but the men just laughed at her defiance.

"You're the one that came to us," he reminded her. "You can't just leave like a tease."

Right, _this_ was why she didn't go out. For every sweet and protective Adrien, there were ten pushy Gregorys, and dozens of creeps like these.

"I'm leaving," she asserted. "Don't follow me."

She took a step backwards, not willing to give them her back, and the nearest one ran at her. Taking a ready position, she lifted her fist, only to flinch as something flew by her and crashed into the charging man's face. He crumpled to the floor and the baton retracted back to its original size over her shoulder.

Marinette froze, "Chat?"

There was really no question as to who it could be, yet she was still overwhelmed when the leather clad hero came to stand just a little in front of her. She thought he would smile at her, make a joke about how she was always getting into trouble, or call her Princess.

Instead, every line of his body was tense, and he didn't so much as look at her as he stared the men down. "Did they touch you?"

The growl laced with his words startled her, but she managed to answer honestly, "No."

"But they were trying to?"

There wasn't really any way to answer that. It was obvious what they wanted to happen before Chat showed up. Not that they would have succeeded. It might be the alcohol speaking, but Marinette felt like she could take them in a fist fight right about now.

Her silence seemed to be answer enough for him, and he launched himself at the men. His baton went straight to the ringleader's jaw and Marinette was certain that something - a tooth, most likely - went flying out of his mouth.

"Wait," Marinette called as he threw another one against the wall. When he turned to the only two uninjured ones, one of them turned tail and ran screaming for help. This was why they weren't vigilantes. They could press charges, or at least denounce him to the public as somebody that beat men that had no hope against him! "Wait, Chat!"

The last one seemed frozen in fear until Chat gripped him by the collar, and then he began struggling and literally crying for mercy.

"Chat, stop!" Marinette yelled loud enough that she worried somebody might come to investigate. But it served its purpose, the fist Chat had lifted was held in the air. "Please, Kitty."

At the sound of his nickname, he dropped the man and turned to face her. She was only peripherally aware of the men rising to shaky feet and stumbling down the alley towards safety. The only thing she could focus on was the terribly sad look in Chat's eyes.

"Princess," he took a step towards her but stopped when she flinched away from him.

"Why are you here?" she asked. It wasn't _fair!_ Why was he always there when she was trying to get over him?

"Why are you walking down dark alleys alone?" he shot back.

Marinette pouted, "It's your fault I'm here alone."

"My fault? How is it my fault? You won't even talk to me, how could I be responsible for anything you do?"

She knew he couldn't possibly understand. She knew it was unfair to blame him for her own feelings. But she was tipsy and angry and ready for a fight, "You ruined me! I could be back there right now making out with a super hot model, but I can't because all I could think about was you! I don't want to kiss anyone that isn't you! I don't want to go home with anyone that isn't you! All I want is you!"

That was. . . way more honest than she intended. She's not the best drinker.

"Marinette," Chat smiled softly at her, almost carefully, and he reached out for her.

"Don't," she insisted and was pleased when he stopped immediately. "I don't want to want you."

The hand he had outstretched for her dropped, "Well, why not? What's so wrong with me?"

"Nothing! Everything!" She wondered how long she could blame the alcohol for her words. "I want other things too! I want to go on dates, and get married, and have children! I don't want to spend the rest of my life in a dark room!"

"I can give that to you!" Chat declared and seemed just as surprised as she was by his words. But then he nodded resolutely and walked towards her. For every step he took, she took one backwards until she felt the wall against her back.

He grabbed her wrists when she raised her hands like a shield. "How would that work? Am I going to become Marinette Noir? Are you going to show up to the delivery room in full costume?"

"I don't know," he admitted. "But we can make it work. We _can._ "

Marinette felt tears prick her eyes at the desperate sound of his voice. Her heart beat a steady tattoo of _my love, my love, my love_ and she closed her eyes. "I want to. But -"

"No," he let go of her wrists to cup her face, tilting it towards him. "Don't! Just - I want you." Her eyes snapped open and she was surprised to see the same yearning she felt reflected in his eyes. "I want you, Marinette, and you want me. So just - just be mine. Be mine."

She rose to her tiptoes at the same time he leaned down and she sighed in contentment when their lips connected. She smiled into the kiss even as a tear trailed down her cheek against her volition and she reached over to wrap her arms around his shoulders and dig her fingers into his hair. The sweetness of the kiss faded quickly as he pinned her to the wall and she began to feel overheated.

Her leg rose to wrap around his waist and he purred his appreciation before grabbing her waist and lifting to pin her against the wall.

"I missed you," he whispered breathlessly when they pulled apart.

Marinette smiled and rubbed their noses together, "I missed you too." She didn't ask him to never leave her again. She knew, even in that moment that they were wrapped around each other, that it couldn't last forever. It would be unfair of her to ask for so much from him when she didn't have the courage to give her everything to him.

But he wanted her and she wanted him, and that could be enough for right now.

She arched off the wall and ground her hips against his, causing him to growl and press her harder into the wall, his mouth attacking her neck. "Please," she mewled, though she wasn't entirely certain what for.

He seemed to understand, anyway. He pushed off the wall, placing one arm securely around her waist, and in a practiced move pulled out his baton and set it to extend. He pecked her lips and then grinned widely, "Hold on, Princess."

Marinette's giggles echoed through the night as he launched them to the sky.

* * *

 **A/N:** Is this the part where everything gets resolved? You'd think so, wouldn't you?

The drinking age in France is eighteen (fifteen for like beer). Even if I don't approve, it's technically not underage drinking.

Alya's OTP is MarinettexHappiness, and she and Nino are honestly saints for putting up with these two!

This chapter's title is from **I Don't Wanna Live Forever by Zayn and Taylor Swift.** I don't listen to either of their music, and I didn't watch the movie it's from, but it came up on my suggested YouTube videos and it's is honestly a good song. The full lyric is "I don't wanna live forever, 'cause I know I'll be living in vain/ And I don't wanna fit wherever, I just wanna keep calling your name/ Until you come back home." Which perfectly describes the angst in this fic.

Let me know what you liked, didn't like, and what you thought could use improvement!

~ Destiny's Sweet Melody


	18. These Friends Keep Talking Way Too Much

**A/N:** My work schedule got turned around so that _Monday_ was my only day off and I almost forgot it was Wednesday. But, I actually remembered and managed to do final editing and everything, and even started replying to reviews, and the moment I was about to submit, I was hit with SERVER ISSUES! It was all the site's fault and therefore no one should judge me! I'm so angry that my perfect updating record has been shattered due to technical difficulties. Ugh!

But, anyways, you know how the summary promised there would be a huge freaking problem? Remember that Kama Sutra quote about being too consumed by passion to notice danger? Yeah, that's relevant.

 **To GuestXO:** Don't worry, they're getting a _tiny_ bit better at talking through their issues, so even though there's a bit of a hiccup this chapter, it's not going to be _too_ bad. lol

 **To Yazeriko:** Oh my gosh, don't tease me like that! lol I actually don't have any of those social media platforms because I have the soul of a 90 year old crone, but I stalked your tumblr right after getting your message and everything is so pretty! You honor me with your words XD

 **To KwibKwib:** Yeah, there's a lot of issues they have to work through in order to get to a happy ending, but they'll get there!

 **To Marichaton:** Thanks for reviewing! I'm glad you like the story and I hope you like the rest as well!

* * *

 **All Your Love Is Revenge**

 **Ch. 18: These Friends Keep Talking Way Too Much**

It took all of Marinette's self-control to not cry out as Chat entered her. She had to remind herself that her parents were just downstairs and not even aware that she was home since they had entered through the balcony, but it felt so good she almost didn't care. She didn't think about how she was going to explain her disappearance to Alya and the others, she didn't worry about how she was going to tell her parents she got home, she didn't even care that he broke the lock on her skylight again in their desperation to get into the room. All of those were problems for a later time, all she cared about was right now.

She was, quite frankly, impressed that either of them had enough sense to pull the curtains and shutters closed and bring out a condom considering how lost she felt in the sensations. The way he refused to separate from her lips for longer than two seconds at a time led her to believe he felt the same way.

It felt so impossibly good, better than it had ever felt before. The way he plastered himself to her body as if he were genuinely trying to become one with her warmed her heart, and the friction between their bodies rubbed her overly sensitive nipples in a way that made stars explode behind her eyes.

She was grateful that he was eager to swallow her cries, trapping her lips and invading her mouth with his tongue almost violently. "Mine," he growled against her jaw and the possessiveness in his voice caused her insides to quiver.

"Yours," Marinette mewled blissfully, because there was no point in denying it any longer.

At some point during their strange friendship - maybe back in September, when she first suggested they have sex, or maybe all the way back when she decided to redo her entire room just so that he could spend more time with her - she had invited him into her life and he had made a permanent home for himself there. Whether he knew it or not. And she wasn't about to let him leave her life again; she had tried it and it had gone horribly. Marinette was never going to be without her beloved kitty ever again.

"Yours," Chat echoed. She would have asked him what he meant, but then he pulled her knees up until they were almost at his shoulders and she had to clench her teeth to keep from crying out as her back arched off the bed. "You are mine, and I am yours."

Marinette whimpered and had to close her eyes when she suddenly felt them burn. Was she really going to be the person that cries during sex because her partner was overly romantic? If he kept whispering the equivalent of wedding vows, then maybe.

Her nails dug into his shoulders as she felt her climax approach, "Mine."

* * *

At some point later, Marinette was pulled out of the light doze she had drifted into by a flash of green light. She whined pitifully, despite having been more than satisfied, she didn't want Chat to go. Even though she understood he had to, she kept her eyes shut and curled up under the covers like a cranky child.

The sound of a click and light beating down on her eyelids startled her into opening her eyes. Chat grinned nervously, "Sorry, did I wake you?"

"No," she answered despite her voice being thick with sleep. An eyebrow ticked upwards as she saw Chat settle back into bed.

Not that she was complaining. Especially not when he pulled her to him to cuddle. "I just wanted to be able to see you," he admitted quietly.

Marinette blushed but couldn't keep the wide smile off her face. He _missed_ her. He actually missed her! It hadn't even been a full week since she had left him alone on her balcony, but it had felt like an eternity to her. Time had moved slowly, every second that she had thought he was lost to her forever like needles against her skin, and it wasn't until he kissed her in that alleyway that time had begun its forward march again. Everything felt like it was right again.

Yet, at the same time, it felt like time moved far too quickly. She knew it would be dawn soon and he would have to go home. Technically, Marinette understood this, but in actuality, she hooked a leg over his waist and pulled him closer. She tilted her head back for a kiss, much gentler and slower than any they had shared that night, but so much sweeter.

Chat sighed deeply, his whole body leaning into hers. "I never want to leave this bed."

"Neither do I," she admitted with a giggle. In a perfect world, they would be able to shut themselves in this room and nothing and no one outside it would exist. No Hawk Moth, no akumas, no responsibilities, no secret identities. Just the two of them, together. "But my parents would probably come up to investigate if I never went down."

Chat pouted at her and she nipped at his lower lip before soothing it with her tongue, quickly pulling him into a hungry kiss. It grew in intensity as she sank her fingers into his hair, until she was pushing her hips against his.

"I _just_ turned on the lights," he whined.

Marinette smiled impishly. She had been more than satisfied already, but there was always room for more satisfaction. "Just one more before you go."

It wasn't like he was going to say no.

* * *

Marinette was giddy. There was no other word to describe the bubbly excitement she felt that kept a smile permanently etched onto her face as she got ready for school. She felt so filled with energy that she could barely stay still as she brushed her hair, electing to leave it down because Chat had mentioned she should wear it like that more often. Her mood was so bright, that even Tikki seemed pleased with the turn of events despite never having been a fan of her sex life with the masked man.

"I'm happy you're happy," the kwami smiled. "And maybe now you can work through your issues and share your burdens."

"I don't want to think about that," Marinette sing-songed. She didn't want to think about the future; not about ten years from now, or a year from now, or even a week! Worrying about an uncertain future was what had made her miserable in the first place. It was enough to be happy right now, and to know that Chat would be back again that night.

All the planning in the world could lead to nothing even when there wasn't magic and secret identities involved.

Tikki huffed, "Marinette, you shouldn't run from your problems."

"I'm not running, I'm pushing it aside." Why couldn't she just focus on being desired? Maybe he didn't love her back, but he needed her the same way she needed him. With time, perhaps, he could learn to love her. The way he spoke to her last night certainly indicated love was within the realm of possibility. "I'll cross that bridge when I get to it."

The miniature luck god narrowed her eyes but dutifully flew into Marinette's purse as the girl skipped her way down the stairs. "Bye Maman, bye Papa! I'm going to school."

"Oh, Marinette, we didn't hear you come in," her papa smiled at the realization that his baby girl hadn't spent the night in some unknown location.

"I got in pretty late, so I tried my best to be quiet," she giggled at her half-truth.

Her maman lifted a brow, "You're certainly in a good mood."

Not even her suspicious tone could pierce the happy bubble Marinette was currently residing in, "I had a lot of fun. I'll tell you all about it later."

"You'd better," Sabine snorted as her daughter exited the apartment.

Marinette hummed the entire way to school, lost in her memories and positive emotions. That was why she didn't notice the crowd in front of the school. That was why she didn't even realize that the phone she had stuffed into her purse had no battery. If she had bothered to check it, she might have had some warning. But she had been too busy being happy to realize that happiness was in danger.

"Marinette!"

She didn't recognize the voice, but as far as she knew she was the only Marinette in school, so she turned towards the person that called to her. And then immediately froze when she was swarmed by what seemed like a small army of reporters and camera men. Instinct was the only thing that made her turn and run into her school as her mind blanked with fear. She ran so fast her lungs were burning by the time she stumbled into the classroom.

All chatter immediately stopped as she skidded to a stop, her hands landing on her knees as she bent over and heaved for breath. She imagined they were all surprised at her state, but guessed that at least one of them might know what the heck was going on. "Does anybody know why reporters are looking for me?"

The silence continued and she straightened as a cold feeling began to overtake her. Why were they all staring at her like they didn't even know her? Why was Alya looking at her like a mother worrying over her young? "Guys. . . what's going on?"

She thought for a moment that perhaps they'd all just stay there frozen, staring at her, and then Kim - sweet, blithe, _idiotic_ Kim - shouted, "I can't believe you're fucking Chat Noir!"

Marinette froze at the same time Tikki began flying frantically in her purse. She sure hoped nobody noticed that. "What?" her voice was a strangled whisper, and she forced herself to speak clearer. "No, I'm not!"

Her denial seemed to wake everybody up and they all talked at the same time, making it impossible for her to understand what they were saying. She could see Alya waving a newspaper around, and Nino gripping her shoulder in a futile attempt to calm her down.

"Oh, please!" Of _course_ , Chloé's voice was the one that sounded over the others. "There's photographic evidence! I can't believe even _you_ would settle for that mangy cat."

"Don't call him mangy!" Marinette snapped before blushing. That probably wasn't helping her case. "And there's no evidence because I'm not sleeping with him!"

"Marinette," Alya's voice sounded strangely subdued. The designer turned to her best friend and finally saw what she was holding. In the very center of the first page was a picture, obviously enlarged and slightly pixilated, of a couple in a passionate embrace. One of them was very obviously Chat Noir, and he was pinning a small, dark-haired female against the wall of a dirty alleyway.

That was last night! That was just _hours_ ago! How was that already in an actual, physical newspaper? Sure, it seemed like one of those trashy, gossip driven rags, but _what the fuck?_

"That's not me!"

"Mari," Nino deadpanned. Okay, so that was a terrible excuse, but there's no reason for him to be giving her such a disappointed look.

"There's no proof that's me!"

"It's from a video," Alya explained, wincing as she pulled out her phone and offered it to the blue eyed girl. Marinette made no move to take it. "You can clearly hear him call you Marinette."

"Also Princess!" Rose chirped suddenly. "That's so sweet!"

Oh no.

"You've been dating Chat Noir?" Alya asked, hurt clear in her eyes and her voice.

"No!" Marinette insisted, and that at least was true. Not that her actual relationship with him was much improvement. "That was just - that was -" she sighed tiredly, not even sure what she could deny, what they had heard, what was captured on that video. "How much of the conversation did you hear?"

The classroom exploded into chatter as they all offered their own versions of her conversation. She winced at the opposing, grating voices and was almost grateful when Alya slammed her textbook against the desk with enough force that silence fell immediately. _Almost_ because she was looking at the desk with a look of such rage that she must have been imagining someone on the receiving end. Hopefully Chat. Marinette loved him, but Alya had quite the swing on her when angry.

Exhaling a harsh breath through her nose, she frowned at her best friend. "It started kind of suddenly. The first thing you hear is you saying something about a delivery room." The brunette seemed pained as she asked, "You're not pregnant, are you?"

Marinette's face must have been cherry red by then, "No! That was nonsense! I was drunk! We all say stupid things when we're drunk!"

"Marinette?"

Said girl turned towards the door and felt the breath leave her when she saw Adrien standing in the doorway, white as a ghost. _Oh no._ Poor Adrien! He was smart enough to figure out that the picture had been taken mere minutes after he had kissed her. How must he be feeling now?

"Dude, I'm so sorry," Nino stage-whispered loud enough that the entire class could hear.

Great, so now people were aware that she had broken Adrien's heart! The only way this could get worse was if her parents found out about it. Luckily, they didn't waste time on gossip like the newspaper Alya was holding. But. . . at least one of those cameras was for the local news, wasn't it?

"Wait, how widespread is this?"

"The video is trending on twitter," Max informed her. "And there is to be coverage on the topic on the morning news."

"The news?" The news her parents watched every morning? The news with Nadja, who had seen Marinette grow up? The news that all of Paris watched? Marinette suddenly felt dizzy, and she clutched at her head as her breath came in heaves. "My parents! My parents can't find out about this from the news! They can't. . ."

Dark spots danced in the air before her, and Marinette was vaguely aware of Alya crying out her name and somebody grasping her arms just as her knees gave out.

The next thing she knew, she was lying on a bed in the school's infirmary. The nurse was nowhere to be seen, but Alya was sitting in a chair just to the side. The brunette was focused on her phone, furiously typing at the speed of light, and cursing under her breath. Marinette frowned as she wondered where this left them. Would Alya even want to be her friend now that she knew she had been lying to her for a significant amount of time?

Alya hated liars as much as Marinette did and this was a pretty big thing to be lying about. Not the sex part, they had already decided that losing her virginity at the club was acceptable. It was the fact that she knew _Chat Noir_ intimately and had never told the owner of the Ladyblog that would probably cause the most contention.

"Why didn't you answer my messages?" Alya asked without looking up from her phone.

"I - I forgot to charge my phone. . . I was distracted," she was surprised there was enough blood in her face to blush.

The blogger snorted, "Yeah, I bet."

Marinette winced and made to turn to face the wall when Alya spoke again, "I'm sorry! I know I'm acting like a mama bear again, and I _just_ said I would stop that. I just - Chat Noir? Really?"

"Alya," she warned, a tight frown on her face.

"I know you're his biggest fan and all, but you have to know this isn't going to end well, right?"

Marinette flinched but stayed quiet because it was true.

"You know he loves Ladybug, right?"

"He doesn't!"

"There are twenty-seven interviews on my blog alone that prove he does. If he's using you because she won't give him the time of day, I swear I'll skin him myself!"

"Alya!"

"He took advantage of you, didn't he? He lied to you! He knew you were his biggest fan so he manipulated you into sleeping with him!"

"Will you at least look at me!"

The blogger startled at her shout, but finally looked up from her phone to gaze at Marinette. The designer knew there were tears in her eyes, and that seemed to calm the brunette down.

"Do you know what they're saying about you?" Alya asked, turning her phone so that Marinette could see she was on the home page of the Ladyblog. "They're calling you a whore. That you stole him from Ladybug. That Hawk Moth sent you to seduce and get rid of him. You're basically the devil and he's your poor, innocent victim. I'm one hate message away from taking down the Ladyblog completely."

Marinette felt her heart constrict at the trembling tone of her best friend's voice. "I'm not the devil, but neither is he. I know Chat, we've been friends for years. I really haven't been dating him, but I - I _have_ been sleeping with him for - for about f-five months."

The phone fell to the floor with a clatter as they stared at each other in silence. Marinette forced herself to sit up, refusing to be cowed. She hadn't done anything wrong, and she refused to be made to feel ashamed by commentators on the internet or her best friend.

"So. . . when you said you'd tell me if you were having sex unless it was with Ladybug or something, Chat Noir was the or something?"

Marinette smiled nervously and nodded. At least she understood she wasn't just keeping it secret because she didn't trust Alya.

"And your new love, the one that rejected you. . ."

"Ah, well, that's actually a bit more complicated."

Alya raised a brow and waited for her to continue, but thankfully the nurse came in to check on her at that moment. The matronly woman fussed over Marinette and clucked about the state of society where they would harass a young girl for her amorous feelings. The blue haired girl smiled, glad that there was at least one person in the building that shared her feelings on the matter.

The nurse declared that she was just fine but offered to let her hide out in her office for the day if she wanted and Marinette readily agreed. Alya frowned but promised she would take extensive notes to share and bring her homework to her.

Unable to resist, Marinette charged her phone and browsed through the Ladyblog to read the comments that Alya had spoken of. They weren't pretty. The vast majority seemed to be upset that this meant their OTP LadyNoir wouldn't be happening, while a few called her a simple fling. Surprisingly, there were a few that defended her, claiming that it was obvious from Chat's words on the video that he cared about her. Her heart warmed at the fact that Alya had responded to every single hate message with a strongly worded defense and the warning that _one more word_ would get them banned. She flushed when she saw that some people came to the conclusion she was pregnant because of her words at the very beginning of the video.

Oh, she hoped her parents hadn't watched it yet. She wanted to call them, but couldn't find the words to explain herself.

Twitter was a bit more forgiving, most of the comments were well-intentioned jokes and bawdy suggestions. She giggled to realize they were a meme and considered sending some of the more amusing ones to Chat, but figured he probably wouldn't appreciate them right now. She wondered how he was taking the news, and whether he would come by to see her or avoid her until it blew over. Avoiding would be the smart thing, but she had just gotten him back, she wouldn't be able to handle losing him again so soon.

Not able to help herself, she sent a quick text to Chat's baton: _Are you okay?_

The final bell rang, and Marinette decided to wait until most of the students cleared out of the building. The reporters were still out there, according to the nurse, but maybe she could find a quiet place to transform and avoid them altogether.

The door opened to reveal Alya in a much better mood than before, "Hey, girl, ready to go?"

"Go? I wanted to see if the reporters would give up first."

"Come on, you didn't really think we'd let you go through this alone, did you? We have a plan!"

"We?" Marinette tilted her head curiously and approached the door. She was surprised to see her entire class, minus Sabrina and Chloé, waiting for her with careful smiles. More surprising was that Ivan was shirtless. "Why is Ivan half naked?"

"Because I'm wearing his shirt!" Myléne explained simply, and the designer realized that she was wearing her boyfriend's shirt like a dress.

Before she could ask, Alya explained, "Myléne was the only one your height, so she's going to lend you her clothes."

"And I'm going to lend you my hat," Nino added.

"And my glasses will serve to obscure your facial features," Max continued.

"And we'll be there to push anybody out of your space," Kim flexed his arms.

Marinette felt tears prick her eyes and offered them a watery smile, "Thanks, you guys."

"Don't cry, just get dressed," Alya pushed the assorted supplies into her arms. Marinette continued to offer mumbled thanks until her best friend all but shoved her through the open door.

As she stumbled into the nurse's office she slipped on the glasses and declared, "Wow, Max, you're really blind!"

"I am aware of that, Marinette."

* * *

It was fortunate that she was so short. Flanked by Ivan and Kim, nobody seemed to notice her as she walked out the side door to Adrien's car. She had tried to turn down his offer for a ride - honestly, how could he be so understanding? - but he insisted and Alya agreed it was for the best. The ride was slightly easier since practically half their class piled into the vehicle and rode to Alya's home, the other half quickly agreeing to meet up there.

Alya's parents were thankfully nonjudgmental, only asking Marinette how she was feeling and acting as if they didn't know she was currently famous for sucking face with a superhero.

The cramped apartment was filled with energy and conversation for about an hour until it was decided that all the boys - even Nino - had to go because Kim asked Marinette for sex tips. "That was like some adult film pro shit. The way he just grabbed your ass and pushed you against the wall. Teach me your ways!"

"He did not grab my ass!" Marinette insisted, earning titters from Alya's younger sisters. She flushed violently and hurriedly sequestered herself in her best friend's room.

There was a commotion that sounded vaguely familiar to the last one Kim started over her sex life and then Alya, Myléne, Rose, Juleka, and Alix filed into the room.

"My mom says if we're gonna talk about sex, then we have to stay in here."

"Are we going to talk about sex?" Marinette blinked at them.

"Fuck yeah, we are," Alix cried. "Is Chat Noir kinky? He looks like he'd be kinky, with all the leather."

Marinette was tired of blushing so much. "No, he's very sweet and. . . considerate."

"Sweet and considerate as in boring, or as in he'll eat you out without asking?" Juleka asked in the same tone one may ask about the weather.

Oh look, she actually _could_ blush more!

"Oh my god, Chat Noir ate you out!" Alya seemed gleeful for somebody that had wanted to murder him only a few hours earlier. Marinette supposed she had stopped displacing her anger towards the nameless Ladyblog trolls onto the more immediate target of Chat Noir, and had decided to. . . _accept_ the situation the way she had before she found out who Marinette's new love was.

Why had she ever wanted to exchange sex stories with her friends? This was embarrassing!

"So, does this mean you know his secret identity?" Rose questioned sagely and they all turned curious eyes to her.

Oh great, she was going to have to admit that she slept with someone whose name she didn't even know, wasn't she? "No, I. . . have the blackout curtains and stuff. . ."

"Wait, you've had those for years," Alya realized. "How long has this been going on?"

"J-just five months!" she insisted earnestly. "I got them because he slept over sometimes."

That. . . probably didn't help.

Alya glared, "Start from the beginning."

* * *

Marinette admitted everything. Or, almost everything. She went all the way back to Evillustrator, to how they "met" and the first time he called her Princess, much to Rose's glee. She reminded them about her grandmother becoming La Befana, and about Galciator, adding the fact that he came to check on her and she saw a side she had never seen before as he admitted the depths of his feelings for Ladybug. She told them about becoming akuma bait - and had to stop as Alya laughed for about three minutes - and how he insisted he had to watch over her. How watching over became hanging out, and hanging out became tradition and family and home.

She told them how she had shared her own romantic sorrows with him, and how he had always lifted her spirits when she was sad. She even admitted that it was her idea to start their friends with benefits arrangement, and that it had been a stupid idea inspired by a stupid movie and lack of sleep. She told them about the non-dates he had taken her on for their "anniversaries," but stopped short of their break up. Alya already knew about it, but she didn't want the entire class to know about her drama.

By the end of her story, Rose was shedding happy tears, Juleka was smiling gently, and Alix, surprisingly, had a tremulous smile on her face and looked one more sweet story away from crying. Alya had her eyes narrowed, but Marinette chose to ignore that.

The sun was setting when the others left the apartment and Alya offered to share her room with Marinette since her parents' bakery was being bombarded by reporters. Marinette still didn't have the courage to call them, but Madame Césaire was kind enough to call and inform them that they would happily watch over Marinette for the night.

After not speaking throughout dinner, Alya finally said what was on her mind as they settled for bed. "You love him, don't you?"

Marinette froze for a moment, but decided there was no reason to lie anymore. And she was so very tired of lying. "Yes."

"And he rejected you?"

"Not technically," she insisted. "I made things needlessly complicated. What he technically said was that he didn't love Ladybug anymore but that nobody had taken her place. I may have avoided confessing directly."

Alya seemed startled at the mention of her OTP being dead in the water, but quickly shook it off. "Do you think he could love you?"

She shrugged, "I don't know. I didn't realize I loved him until very recently. I thought all that stuff we did together was just between friends. Maybe he just needs a little more time too."

"Marinette," Alya laughed suddenly. "You do know that friends with benefits is the nice way of saying fuck-buddies, right? You're not supposed to _actually_ be friends. You're not supposed to go on dates, and have days set aside to enjoy each other's company, or braid each other's hair. That's just a relationship."

"It is?" She had never had a relationship before.

Alya seemed unfairly amused by her ignorance. "Yes! I can't believe you've been dating Chat Noir without realizing it!"

"We're not dating!"

"But you love him and he loves you," Alya placed a finger over her lips when she made to protest that they weren't sure if Chat loved her. "He loves you. If you don't believe me, re-watch the video. If he doesn't love you, I'll quit on investigative journalism."

* * *

 **A/N:** Will I ever let Marinette live? Probably, but not right now. Believe it or not, I actually had this planned since the beginning. Before anybody says anything, **yes, I know he has night vision,** but it looks all green and stuff and it's not the same as _seeing!_ Let my sappy boy be sappy!

Marinette's class loves her! They stood up to an akuma for her. They ain't gonna let some nosy reporters ruin her life! They spent the entire day debating what they were going to do. Adrien was sweating nervously as Alya described the myriad ways she planned to kill Chat Noir. The teachers didn't even try to stop them.

This chapter's title comes from **Side to Side by Ariana Grande and Nicki Minaj**. I was trying to avoid repeating artists, but it just fit too well. It's a song about getting sexed so good you can't walk straight! The full lyric is "These friends keep talking way too much/ Say I should give you up/ But I can't hear them."

As always, let me know what you liked, didn't like, and what could use improvement!

~ Destiny's Sweet Melody


	19. I Refuse to Give You a Final Kiss

**A/N:** Fire zones exist in France, right? Right.

 **To ApolloShep:** Thank you so much! I'm glad you like it :)

 **To Anonymous:** Yeah, that's the risk and she kind of knew that going in. And I love her class, they're all so precious.

 **TO GuestXO:** Her class _is_ awesome, and while her parents are understanding there's the little detail that she straight up lied to their faces, so things are going to be tense for a bit. You're going to give me such a big head by saying you might cry, but don't worry, I have no intentions of abandoning this fic and everything is on schedule so far.

 **To KwibKwib:** You have to give him _a little_ credit at least and assume he knows how to sneak around without getting caught lol. I'm glad you enjoyed it!

 **To I Made A Review:** ASHKJSRNDND Well, you're not _wrong_. I kind of hate that it totally sounds like something they would do!

* * *

 **All Your Love Is Revenge**

 **Ch. 19: I Refuse to Give You a Final Kiss**

The sound of her phone vibrating on the night table beside Alya's bed woke Marinette up. Blindly, she reached for it and winced at the brightness and the fact that it was two in the morning. Then, realizing who the messages were from, she quickly sat up in the bed. Unlocking the device, she read through the three quick messages that Chat had sent.

 _Am *I* ok?_

 _Are YOU ok?_

 _You're not home._

Careful to not disturb her still sleeping best friend, she crawled out of the bed and tiptoed her way to the bean bag chair in the corner. She briefly considered heading for the bathroom, but Alya's bedroom door squeaked terribly and she would probably wake her friend, if not the entire household. Pressing her thumb over the contact name Kitty, she placed the phone to her ear and waited. It rang for so long that she worried he might not pick up, but finally, after perhaps the twelfth tone, she heard the other line click and Chat take a breath.

"I'm staying with my friend Alya," she whispered in a rush, afraid he might not actually want to talk to her at the moment. Was that a breath as he prepared to talk or a resigned sigh as he realized he couldn't avoid her? Whatever Alya had told her before they fell asleep, she would understand if he was slightly annoyed at getting caught, and blaming it on her stupid decisions that landed them in that alley. "There were a lot of reporters at my place, we thought it'd be best if I just stay away for the night."

"Yeah, sorry about that," Chat said slowly.

 _What kind of tone is that?_ Regret? Shame? Embarrassment? She couldn't be certain, and she wasn't sure she wanted to decipher it. " _You're_ sorry? What are you sorry for?" Alya would have to get in line for skinning him if he said he was sorry for kissing her.

"This is all my fault," he explained, sounding properly chastised.

"I was there too, you know," Marinette reminded him. The last thing she needed was for him to go all tragic hero that must bear his burdens by himself and start avoiding her to "spare" her from all the drama.

"But I'm the hero!" he insisted stubbornly. "I'm the one that can see in the dark and has super hearing. I should have noticed somebody was there with us but I was too busy -" he choked on his words and she could picture the blush peeking out from under his mask. "I should have noticed!"

Marinette sighed tiredly, "You wouldn't have been there at all if it wasn't for me. You can blame yourself all you want, but it doesn't change the fact that I'm just as responsible."

Considering that she was also a masked hero, she should know better than to just start groping Chat in an alley just a few streets away from a popular night club. Tikki hadn't had a moment to reprimand her since her friends hadn't left her alone a single second to make sure she wouldn't wallow in despair, but she was sure the kwami would chew her out once she was alone in her room. _After_ her parents interrogated, of course.

"Are you okay?" Chat asked worriedly and she realized she was making a pitiful whining noise.

"Just worried," she admitted, adjusting herself so she could tuck her knees to her chest. "I don't know what I'm going to tell my parents."

"The truth?" He sounded unsure himself. "There's no point in denying. . . _us_ anymore. You can tell them what's been going on."

Oh right, they still hadn't set aside any time to define what it was they were doing yet. She hadn't really been focused on labels the night before, and they hadn't been able to talk to each other until now. _You are mine and I am yours._ That's more than fuck-buddies, right? Not quite officially boyfriend-girlfriend, but not a simple fling either. Right?

Ugh, this wasn't really the time to be worrying about their relationship status. That was only half the issue anyway. "I just don't know what they'll be thinking after all the comments they must have read by now." What if they thought she was pregnant? _Maman's going to kill me!_

She was startled when she heard him growl loudly, and wondered where he was that he didn't worry about attracting attention. "I'm sorry about that too! I wanted to go on the news to tell everybody to back off but Queen B told me I'd probably just make things worse for you if I act all territorial."

"Queen B? I thought she didn't like me." Marinette had only worked with the bee themed hero twice as Marinette and it was like flipping a switch from when the blonde was with Ladybug. All her sweetness and eagerness to help melted away and left a snarky, pushy, borderline bully that used Marinette as literal akuma bait once. She wondered if she had accidentally insulted B at some point.

"I thought she didn't like _me_ ," Chat agreed and that was true too. B had never been subtle about how happy she would be if Ladybug dumped the cat and took her as her official sidekick. But, apparently she cared. Of course she did, B was too compassionate to genuinely hate anyone. "But she basically tackled me to the ground and told me the best thing to do was to just let it blow over. She was the nice one, Carapace just glared at me and lectured me about responsibilities as both a hero and a man for about twenty minutes. Rena's been sending me profanity-laden messages on and off all day."

Marinette snorted with laughter and then took a deep breath so that she wouldn't laugh aloud. "Sorry they all seem to be treating you like the bad guy." Not entirely sorry, of course, since everybody else was treating _her_ like the bad guy. It was nice to know that the heroes of Paris were on her side.

"Of course they are," he told her in a tone that usually foretold trouble. "You're so sweet and kind that no one will believe me if I tell them you're a nymphomaniac."

She choked on air, "I - I am not!"

"Oh really, mademoiselle just one more and eat me out before you go?"

Marinette flushed violently and had to slap a hand over her mouth to keep her laughter quiet, "Don't say it like that! You'd better not have told any of them that."

Despite her embarrassment, she was glad to hear him laugh. "Of course not, Princess. A gentleman never kisses and tells." Marinette rolled her eyes, considering that it no longer mattered if he told anybody or not. There's really no way to go back to her saintly reputation when there's video evidence of her rutting against a wall on the internet.

"Hey, Marinette," his voice sounded careful, as if he were afraid of how she would respond. "I miss you."

Warmth erupted inside her and she bowed her head shyly despite the fact that there was no one to see. "I miss you too."

"God, you guys are gross," Marinette jumped at the intruding voice. Her blood turned to ice as she saw Alya sleepily glaring at her from the bed. "You're smiling at your phone like a twelve year old that just got asked out for ice cream for the first time."

"Alya!"

"Alya?" Chat screeched and she heard a click on the other end of the line.

"Wait, no!" Too late. The screen of her phone changed into her home screen as the call dropped. She glared at her best friend, "You scared him."

"Good," the brunette scoffed. "It's too early for me to deal with you being all twitter-patted about Chat Noir."

Marinette shuffled back to bed with a final mournful glance at her phone. "I tried my best to be quiet."

"Well, you failed."

"Rude." True, but rude. "And I'm not _twitter-patted_. What are you? A Victorian era Englishwoman?"

Alya kicked at her under the covers, "There's no other word to describe the grossness of that conversation. I could only hear your end and I could already feel myself getting cavities."

The blue eyed girl blushed and threw the covers over her head, "Alya!"

* * *

Marinette woke up to a text from somebody saved as Queen Beach on her phone. It took her sleep-deprived brain a moment to remember she had saved Chloé's number as Queen B four years ago when they had to work on a group project and she was determined that the spoiled brat would _actually_ work this time. After the superheroine showed up, Marinette had changed Chloé's contact name to Beach out of respect. She probably should have just deleted it.

 _Daddy declared the block your bakery's on a temporary fire zone. You can stop hiding like a coward._

It took three tries for her to decipher what she was reading. Chloé. . . helped her? Technically, Mayor Bourgeois helped her, but why would he care unless his precious daughter - the one he would give the sun and moon to if she asked - told him about it? It had been a strange twenty-four hours.

It only got stranger and more awkward from there. Wearing a shirt that was a bit too long and shorts that she had borrowed from Alya, they headed to school. On the way there, Alya had made them stop at a pharmacy and bought a pregnancy test. No matter how much Marinette blushed and insisted it was unnecessary because she wasn't completely stupid, Alya wouldn't budge until she slipped into the bathroom. And fine, maybe she wasn't the smartest person, but there was no reason for Tikki to look so smug as she sat in the stall for five minutes.

Alya shrieked when Marinette shoved the negative pregnancy test in her face victoriously.

There was no crowd of reporters waiting at the entrance of the school, but Alya still forced her into a run just in case there were paparazzi waiting in the bushes, or if any of the other students would try to claim their five minutes of fame by recording her on their phones.

"It seems the original video was uploaded by a man named Sebastian Lefèvre," Max explained and showed Marinette a picture on his tablet as Alya, Nino, and Kim hovered around her.

She could barely recognize the brown hair and dark eyes of the man that had accosted her with his friends. She had thought that he had run away with his buddies, but apparently he had stayed behind long enough to film his revenge. "He must have been angry about Chat knocking his tooth out."

Four sets of eyes blinked curiously at her, and she realized what it must sound like. She shrugged, "He was defending my honor, or something. That's not the point! The point is that he did this for revenge."

"He sounds like an asshole," Kim agreed. "Let's go knock his other teeth out."

"Not helping, Kim," Alya deadpanned.

* * *

After having Alya and Nino's company for most of the journey home, Marinette trudged the final block alone. She _really_ didn't want to have to face her parents, as ashamed as she was at herself for avoiding them for so long. Yes, she was quite aware that it was awful of her to make them worry all this time. But no, Tikki, she was not taking the coward's way out! She wasn't running away from her parents, she was just giving time for things to cool down.

When the bakery came into view, she saw a post that hadn't been there the day before. Fire Zone: no parking, no standing, no loitering. There were even a pair of police officers standing at the door to the Dupain-Cheng patisserie. Officer Roger Raincomprix nodded at her in greeting and she offered a small smile as she walked around the building to enter by the side entrance.

It wasn't just so she could avoid seeing her parents for a little while longer! Even if it was, it wouldn't have worked, since her parents were sitting in the living room with Nadja and Manon.

Marinette froze, her body halfway through the doorway, and stared. The four of them silently stared back. It was Manon that reacted first, rushing at her in a hug and shouting, "Marinette!"

The older girl hustled them both inside and closed the door, "Hi, Manon."

The redhead didn't seem to notice her lackluster tone, only squeezing her around the middle and cheerfully asking, "Can I tell everybody you're Chat Noir's girlfriend now?"

"Manon," Nadja hissed in warning and Marinette paled.

Oh great, now her parents would know that a nine year old was aware of their daughter's love life before they were. They couldn't _actually_ ground her forever, right? She was technically an adult, wasn't she? She could just. . . walk out of the building, couldn't she? She'd be homeless, but she could do it.

"Er, hi Nadja. If you're here for an exclusive, there's really nothing I could add to that video," she joked weakly.

It was the wrong move, as Nadja frowned icily. "I am insulted that you would think so little of me. I refused on principle to do a report that would tear apart your reputation."

"I - it was a joke. I'm not the best at joking."

There was enough silence in the room that Marinette's quiet voice could be heard. She looked down and bit her lip, the tension thick enough that even Manon noticed and let her go to return to her mother's side.

Sabine cleared her throat, "Thank you both for your company, Nadja, but I think we have to speak alone with Marinette now."

"Anytime," Nadja smiled stiffly before kissing Sabine and Tom on the cheek. She placed a comforting hand on Marinette's shoulder as she walked by her, Manon trailing after her giving hugs to all.

Marinette turned anxious eyes on her parents, who were both standing now, arms crossed and gazes serious. Her maman gestured towards the couch, "Sit."

Her tone brooked no argument, and the designer quickly scampered over to comply. Her papa seemed inordinately tall from this angle. Neither of them spoke for a moment, until finally her maman growled, "Explain."

Marinette felt panicked tears fill her eyes but did her best to will them away. Given the state her parents were in, they would think them little more than crocodile tears and a desperate gamble to get out of trouble. But Marinette knew there was no escaping this conversation. "I did say I had fun that night," she offered a tremulous smile.

They glared back at her. Right, not the time for jokes, especially since she was never very good at them.

Her shoulders slumped and she all but caved in on herself as she looked at the ground. "I'm sorry, I messed up! I should have told you immediately, it's just. . . dangerous."

"He's dangerous?" her papa boomed. "Did he threaten you?"

Wait, no! "That came out wrong! I just meant getting involved with a superhero would be dangerous for you guys!"

"But not for you?" her maman shot back.

Okay, wrong choice of words. "I've been seeing him for three years and no one found out until a day ago!"

Okay, even worse choice of words! At least they didn't yell at her. They just stared so icily she was surprised she didn't freeze.

"That came out wrong too. I haven't been _seeing_ him for three years. We've just hung out, as friends! He. . ." Wait, how honest was she supposed to be? Chat _did_ give her permission to tell her parents everything about "them", but how well would that work out for her? A quick survey of the disappointed look on her papa's face had her deciding that she should be completely honest. It really couldn't worsen their opinion of her at this point. "He used to come by to watch movies every Friday."

"In our home?" Sabine's voice was as sharp as a knife.

Marinette understood the secondary question, "Yeah." She had, in fact, been defiling their loving family home with a leather-wearing cat boy. It's not like they could go to a hotel! Somebody would have noticed way sooner.

"How long?" Tom asked, and at least he didn't sound as angry as his wife. The weariness in his tone didn't make her feel much better, though.

"About five months," she admitted and flinched when her mother angrily clasped her hands together with enough force that it sounded like a slap. Marinette wondered if she was remembering their talk about the birth control pills, the way she had _apologized_ to Marinette for unjustly accusing her of having sex without telling them. "It - it wasn't serious. It was just supposed to be about sex."

"It didn't sound like it was just about sex."

"You've seen the video?" she shrieked. Oh god, they saw the adult film pro shit? There was really no coming back from that.

"It was pretty hard to avoid, no matter how hard we tried," her maman muttered.

"Marinette," her papa began softly. "If you're in a romantic relationship with a superhero, we'll accept it. We might worry, but we don't want you to have to feel like you need to lie to us."

"B- but I'm not," Marinette insisted. She wasn't in a romantic relationship with Chat. An intimate relationship, sure, and they shared a strong friendship, but it wasn't romantic. You are mine and I am yours was a pretty strong statement, but it wasn't a promise, it wasn't a declaration of intent. Love and want were two different things, and he had already told her - indirectly - that he didn't love her. Tears pricked her eyes again and her lower lip trembled, "I'm not!"

"Then if he's pressuring you into being with him, we'll help you get rid of him. Super powers or not, we won't let him hurt you," her maman hissed.

"He's not! He's good and kind and he'd never force me to do anything! It was," a sob hiccupped past her lips and she curled onto her side on the sofa as the tears began falling. "It was my fault! I'm the one that messed up! It was my idea to start having sex and _I_ was the one that ruined everything by falling in love. I'm the one that wants to go on dates and dreams of babies with cat ears. It's not his fault, it's mine!"

She was barely aware of her mother kneeling beside her to wrap her arms around her, and her father doing the same to run his fingers through her hair. She couldn't even be relieved at the fact that they had possibly forgiven her already. They pitied her, and it hurt. It hurt because she was aware that she was the most pitiful person on earth. It took a special kind of stupid to fall in love with somebody that you knew for a fact never so much as considered you romantically.

Her parents murmured soothing words until her sobs subsided into sniffles, and then they offered her milk and cookies. The last time they let her get away with dessert for dinner was when she had just recovered from that horrible flu that had her delirious for three days straight. It was kind of funny, she felt just as bad now.

Was this how it was always going to be with them? One moment she would be feeling like she was on top of the world, and the next she'd feel like she got hit by a truck? Was this really what she was willingly signing up for?

 _It could be enough_ , she insisted. It's not like anyone was ever completely happy all the time. It could be enough. It would have to be.

* * *

Tikki had been idly braiding strands of Marinette's hair when she suddenly fluttered towards her dollhouse. Marinette raised her head curiously a moment before she heard something land on her balcony. Her heart fluttered and a smile appeared on her face, reminding her that she had made the right decision. He made her happy; it was the rest of the world that was the problem.

Shaking the surprisingly dark thought away, she reached over to unlock the skylight with a bright smile. Only to have it fall when he finally climbed down the stairs, instead of jumping down as he usually did.

Chat avoided looking at her and walked down to her bedroom floor from the platform her bed was on. Marinette felt her stomach drop, unnerved by his cold attitude. What was wrong? Had he decided that everything that had happened with the video was too much? Was he going to end things before they even got started? _Stop!_ She needed to stop overthinking things. He was probably just stressed.

"Chat?" she followed him down the steps.

The fact that he kept his back to her, didn't inspire much faith. "Did you mean it?"

"What?" What part of all their conversations was he speaking of?

"When you said you wanted me. Or was that just something stupid you said while drunk?"

Marinette jolted at the words she had said in the classroom. "How did you hear about that? Was there somebody recording _that_ too?"

If it was anybody in her class, it was probably Chloé, but she had been so distracted that she couldn't discredit somebody recording from the hallway.

"That doesn't matter!" Chat spun to face her. Even though his tone was snappish, his eyes were incredibly sad. " _I_ meant it when I said I wanted you. Did you?"

"Of course I did," she moved towards him but stopped when he took a step back.

"Well, you're giving me mixed signals here, Marinette! I don't think you understand how much you mean to me. You're my -" he seemed to physically bite his tongue to stop himself from finishing his sentence. Only to sigh and weakly continue, "You're my mate."

"What?" His mate? Wasn't that kind of like a spouse? In a primitive sort of way.

She could see his blush from beneath his mask and on the tips of his ears, "It's what I call you in my head. You're not just a warm body to me. I want to be with you, as in _with_ you. I want to be yours."

Marinette was certain her heart had skipped several beats as she heard his words. Tears pricked her eyes again, but at least they were happy tears this time. "I have something I call you in my head, too," she admitted shyly, daring to close the gap between them with slow steps. "My love."

His hands twitched at his side and he stared into her eyes. Slowly, she placed her hands on his chest, "I just thought you didn't want me."

Chat huffed and pulled her to his chest, wrapping his arms around her tight enough to hurt. Not that she was planning on pulling away. "I thought _you_ didn't want _me_ ," he gave a watery laugh.

She pulled her head back and was pleased when he began rubbing his nose against hers, "Of course I want you. I said that because I was trying to avoid backlash from the video. You're mine, and I don't ever want to lose you again."

"Mine," Chat repeated with a smile before leaning forward. His lips were just brushing against hers when -

"Ahem!"

Marinette's head whipped towards her trapdoor, and oh yeah, part of her punishment was that she wasn't allowed to close it anymore. Did they hear _all_ of that? Her papa looked close to tears. Yep, they heard all of it.

Sabine narrowed her eyes, "Downstairs."

For the second time that day, Marinette found herself sitting on the couch with her parents towering over her. At least this time she had company. Chat was a straight-backed, stuttering mess the entire time, but at least his awkwardness served to prove that he wasn't manipulating her. By the end of their talk, she was pretty sure her parents felt bad for the masked hero.

When they stood, Marinette wrapped her arms around one of Chat's and smiled coyly at her parents. "Would this be a bad time to ask if I could close the trapdoor?"

"Marinette!" Chat sounded scandalized.

Sabine frowned but looked thoughtful, "I suppose I couldn't actually stop you if I tried. Your grandfather tried something like that when your papa went to ask for my hand in marriage and it didn't work out."

Marinette had to stop herself from making a disgusted face. No need to anger her sweet, understanding mother. "Thank you, Maman!"

Chat seemed confused as she pulled him up into her room.

* * *

It was somewhat ironic that they hadn't been able to keep their hands off each other for more than forty-eight hours at a time for the past five months, and now that they had implicit permission from her parents, they were content to just lie there smiling at each other. Not that Marinette wanted to stop. It gave her a warm and pleased feeling to see him smile so genuinely at her and know that he meant it.

"I've been thinking about what you said on Sunday night," Chat said in that same troublesome tone and she hummed in response. "I think Marinette Noir is an excellent name."

She flushed but smiled just the same.

"You know I have to deny being with you until my dying breath, right?" Marinette asked quietly, afraid of disturbing the peaceful mood. So the world knew she had slept with Chat Noir. That didn't have to mean anything, it could have just been a one night stand! Celebrities slept with random people all the time and there was no need to bring it up for too long.

"Yeah, it's for the best," he tucked a strand of hair behind her ear.

For her safety, he meant. Marinette was honestly surprised an akuma hadn't come after her yet, although she supposed no one would be furious enough about her sleeping with Chat to come after her. Despite all the hateful comments, internet trolls usually didn't even care about what they were hating on so violently.

He rubbed her cheek with his thumb, "As long as you're with me, I don't care what the world thinks."

 _Okay, that deserves a reward,_ she thought and leaned over to pull him into a long kiss. When she hooked her leg over his waist he pulled back and she thought he was going to protest again about the fact that her parents were _right there_ and now they were aware of the fact that _he was here._

Instead, his hand swept down to the curve of her ass, "You have the best parents ever."

Marinette burst out laughing.

* * *

 **A/N:** Chloé Bourgeois still deserves a redemption arc! But let's be serious, she's not going to change because there are no consequences to her actions. So, even if she feels like she should do better, she's going to do it without fanfare and with an attitude.

At least we've gotten past that whole presumed unrequited love thing! We're reaching the resolution, yay!

I **headcanon** that Nadja is actually best friends with the Dupain-Chengs and that's why she trusts her only child to a 13/14 year old with the implication that she's been doing so for a long while.

This chapter's title is (translated) from **Me Rehúso (I Refuse) by Danny Ocean**. The full lyric is "I refuse to give you a final kiss, so keep it to yourself."

As always, let me know what you liked, didn't like, and what you thought could use improvement!

~ Destiny's Sweet Melody


	20. So That You Remember If I'm Not With You

**A/N:** I almost didn't write this fic because when I first thought it up I thought, "I'll be lucky if I can get even five chapters out of this story." And now we're TWENTY chapters in, OMG! But, at least I can say we're almost to the end. We have reached the final plot twist, which is kind of three plot points wrapped into one. It'll make sense, I promise!

I actually remembered to update BEFORE leaving for a baseball game, so super early update (for me) today!

 **To GuestXO:** I _promise_ next chapter will be Adrien POV and will explain things from his side better, but for plot reasons, this chapter is Marinette again.

 **To KwibKwib:** LOL, he's super socially awkward, but he's getting better!

 **To I Made A Review:** Alya is a force of nature that should be feared by everyone! And Gabriel should start with therapy, and _then_ take tips from the Dupain-Chengs.

* * *

 **All Your Love Is Revenge**

 **Ch. 20: So That You Remember If I'm Not With You**

Marinette had come to the conclusion that her generation was weird. Or maybe it was Paris itself that was weird. There had to be a certain kind of strangeness to people who didn't so much as flinch at the occasional appearance of monsters with world building powers. Considering how the tourists reacted to akumas, it was probably not the normal reaction. A useful adaptation, but still weird.

She came to this conclusion when, over the course of the week following the revelation of her relationship with Chat, things were weirdly. . . normal. Nobody harassed her, nobody thought it strange, nobody acted like it was anything more than a particularly salacious rumor concerning a girl that had previously been considered saintly. People teased her about it, but that was it. Even when she insisted that there was no relationship, people - especially her classmates - would 'agree' with her statement with a wink.

Kim's dumb ass actually verbally said the word 'wink' to her when she maintained there was nothing she could teach him about sex.

It was a nice weird, however, as it meant her life had more or less returned to normal. It probably helped that she had the mayor, the police force, and the magically blessed heroes of Paris on her side. It was extremely fortunate that Ladybug had sought out Alya for an interview where she informed people that Chat was not an object to be stolen and he had never been hers to begin with. Chat had sent Ladybug an absurdly long message professing his thanks and how much the action meant to him. She had been warmed by the gesture - at the fact that Ladybug's opinion meant so much to him and that perhaps things wouldn't be so awkward the next time they worked together.

Her parents were still subtly disappointed in her, but had accepted that she genuinely believed she was protecting them by keeping them out of the loop. She didn't want to think what they would do if they found out she was Ladybug. They'd probably lock her in her room for life!

Tikki was still judgmental concerning Marinette's decision to keep her identity as Ladybug separate from her relationship with Chat. "Most of the security issues caused by knowing each other's identities are already a reality due to your relationship," she explained gently and Marinette knew she was right.

Honestly, at this point it was just habit, and the ingrained fear created by obsessively hiding her secret for four - almost five - years, that kept her from revealing herself to him. Aside from safety, her biggest fear had always been that he would choose her because she was Ladybug, whether he genuinely loved her or not. But now, he had chosen to be with _Marinette_ even after turning down the superheroine. He had fallen for both sides of her, he _loved_ all of her, she had no reason to doubt him.

The issue of _his_ safety was a nonissue as well. If the world could know that she was cared for by Chat, then it should be okay for her alone to know the identity of the man she loved. She was pretty good at keeping secrets, after all, and she didn't think he'd be _too_ angry to find out that she was Ladybug. Even if he was, she was moderately confident she could persuade him to forgive her relatively quickly.

It could be a really good thing, and she did actually mean to tell him. She just had to work on letting go of her fears, to stop listening to the Tikki voice that insisted secrets and boundaries existed for a reason, and start listening to the actual Tikki who insisted the longer she took to tell him the truth the more upset he would be.

Which was something she wanted to avoid because their relationship was really good right now. And it was an actual _relationship_ now, a fact that still caused her to giggle uncontrollably for about thirty seconds every time she remembered it. Chat visited every night now, to talk and cuddle and watch movies. And, sometimes, to "rut frantically like the world was ending" as she once heard Plagg describe it. Marinette had burst out laughing even as he spluttered embarrassedly at his kwami.

Once, when he came by earlier than usual, they had joined her parents for dinner and the strangest thing about it was how well he got along with her parents. He practically became a courteous saint in front of them! Still had the worst puns, but a saint. Marinette had narrowed her eyes at his far too innocent grin when her mother asked him to come by for dinner more often.

It was, without a doubt, the happiest time of her life. The only thing that she worried could ruin it was the fact that she had unintentionally broken Adrien's heart. When she tried to apologize to him, he only smiled kindly and insisted he was happy that she was happy, reminding her why she had loved him for so long. She certainly had great taste in men! Thanks to Marinette, things had always been a little awkward between them, so the only thing that actually changed was that he seemed to be doing his best to never be left alone with her. Which she could totally understand, all things considered.

As the week wound down, Chat told her, "I want to take you on a date. The date I had planned for our fifth monthiversary. I worked really hard on it, and it all went to waste!"

He sighed dramatically and she blushed. At least he was joking about it now!

"O- okay," she looked up at him expectantly.

"Not right now! I need a little bit of time to put everything together again. Next Saturday?"

She huffed a laugh at the uncertainty in his voice, "I'll check my schedule."

Chat pouted, "If you're going to tease me, then maybe I'll keep the surprise to myself."

"Oh no," she wrapped him in a hug. "I'd love to go!"

She really, really would! An actual, official date! It was the only thing missing to make her life perfect.

Marinette didn't think anybody could blame her for being excited as the days went by and her date with Chat got closer and closer. Alya, still as much of an enabler as she ever was, only smiled and made jokes whenever the blue haired girl started vibrating with excitement. Especially on Friday when she was so excited she kept tripping over her own feet every ten seconds and seemed to be incapable of using her indoor voice.

"You've got too much pent up energy," Alya explained wisely as they walked towards the girls' lavatory. "Let it out, girl!"

"I can't here," Marinette responded, much more loudly than necessary.

"Mari, please tell me you don't _actually_ believe you're subtle. Everybody is just humoring you at this point."

The designer pouted and twiddled her thumbs, "I'm subtle." Alya gave her a look of disbelief. "I can be!"

"Sure you can," the brown eyed girl agreed in a tone of voice that indicated the exact opposite. "But you don't have to be, not about this. Not here."

That was true. Outside, the world had pretty much moved on to the next bit of hot gossip, and aside from the occasional meme sent to her social media accounts, her video was all but forgotten. But the school had been her sanctuary, the student body surprisingly respectful of her choices. When complete strangers were harassing her, they acted like nothing had changed at all, and now that it had blown over she received teasing smiles and knowing looks. Which she appreciated, because people _knew_ that she was Chat's and he was hers.

School was suddenly her favorite place to be during daytime hours. Alya swung the door open and she trailed after her, throwing her arms in the air, "I'm going on a date with Chat Noir!"

She bumped into somebody walking out of a stall, and she jumped back, muttering apologies to Lila Rossi. The skin around the Italian's eyes tightened and for a moment Marinette thought her clothes had flickered and changed colors, but it must have been a trick of the light.

"Excuse me," Lila muttered stiffly before exiting.

"Sorry," Marinette repeated weakly. She actually _had_ gone on that coffee date, that was most certainly not a date-date, and though they weren't friends, she had thought the flutist had been amiable enough. Now though. . .

"She's just jealous," Alya shrugged before entering a stall. "Ignore the attitude."

Marinette blushed, "I already told you, she doesn't like me!"

Lila could be accused of being many things, but subtle wasn't one of them. If she was interested in Marinette, then there was no way the designer would have left that coffee date without realizing it. Alya just didn't like it when she was proven wrong.

"You're so cute when you act all innocent!"

"What do you mean act?" Marinette demanded before she could help herself. Even she could admit that innocent was not an adjective that could be applied to her these days.

The sepia haired girl snickered meanly, "I saw you grinding on that video! I have to say, Kim was right, those were some well-practiced moves."

Marinette clutched her cheeks and resisted the urge to dunk her head underneath running water to extinguish the blush, "Stop bringing up the video! The video doesn't exist!"

"Sure, it doesn't," the blogger humored her.

Closing her eyes, Marinette took a deep breath and tried to focus on the positives. That video was going to be one of the things her friends would never let die, like Max chipping his tooth when they were six and Nathanaёl wearing his shirt inside out for an entire day without realizing it, but at least most of the human population would forget it. Her friends would poke fun at her, but they'd never be malicious about it.

Besides, it meant that they were constantly acknowledging her new relationship. She felt that same bubbly energy fill her up, and she vibrated in place until she threw her hands up again, "I'm going on a date with Chat Noir!"

* * *

As Saturday night drew on, Marinette had to stop herself from jumping around in excitement. She had worked very hard on looking good, after all, no need to ruin it by being overeager. She wore a baby blue tea-length tulle dress and had taken the time to curl her hair and pin it up into a half ponytail. She stuck with flats, though, because even if she had nice legs, heels were the devil and wedges were their unassuming cousins that seemed like a good idea but by the end of the night you wanted to throw them off a bridge.

Tikki thought she looked nice, at least.

At around ten, her mother's voice drifted up, "Marinette, there's someone here to see you!"

Marinette quirked an eyebrow even though nobody was around to see, Tikki already sequestered in her purse. Alya already knew she would be gone for the night, and Chat never used the front door despite her father's teasing that he should call on her like a proper suitor. She couldn't think of who it could be but quickly went down.

Her assumptions were proven wrong when she saw Chat standing in the open doorway awkwardly, holding a bouquet of pink hydrangeas. Upon laying eyes on him, a large smile bloomed on her face and she ran to hug him, "Chat!"

"Hey, Marinette," he rubbed his cheek against hers. "You look really beautiful. Like a real princess."

"Not in the doorway," her maman's voice disturbed the warm and fuzzy feeling, but Marinette did as she said and pulled him in the rest of the way, closing the door behind him.

"Why didn't you come through the balcony?" She was honestly curious. He knew her papa was just joking, right?

Chat frowned, "I thought I felt somebody watching. I did a quick search but didn't find anything, but I thought it'd be best to avoid the skylight."

"I doubt anybody would try to take pictures after last time," Marinette snickered meanly. About a week ago, Chat had noticed a pair of paparazzi on the roof of her old collége, lying in wait to take pictures of him entering her room. The only thing they had gained were stolen memory cards and shattered cameras after Chat threw the devices over the edge. They really didn't have to worry about paparazzi anymore.

"Are those for me?" she reached for the bouquet, but Chat lifted them out of her reach.

"These are for your parents!" he grinned at the way she pouted and folded her arms.

Sabine came to take them from him and cooed, "How sweet."

Marinette blew a raspberry at him, "Suck up."

" _This_ is for you," he pulled a red tulip from behind, where it had probably been tucked beside his baton.

The blue eyed girl squealed in joy and decided to forgive him immediately. She grabbed the bloom with both hands and leaned up to kiss him on the cheek, "Thank you!"

"Ready to go?" Chat smiled sweetly.

 _Absolutely!_ Marinette cried internally but managed to contain herself as she laced her fingers with his. "Yes, I am."

As they walked out through the door, her papa's voice followed them, "Make good choices!" Chat burst out laughing as Marinette blushed cherry red.

* * *

Out of all the places Marinette could have imagined Chat taking her, an abandoned apartment complex was not it. She couldn't quite stop herself from frowning as he let himself in through the rooftop exit, "Are you sure this is safe?"

"Oh sure, it's not abandoned, just uninhabited," he explained easily with a shrug. "It's fully furbished, but it hasn't been prepared for public use yet."

Marinette refused to follow him down the stairs, stopping at the top and crossing her arms, "Is this illegal?"

As if suddenly realizing what it seemed like, Chat smiled nervously and awkwardly rubbed the back of his neck. "No, I promise! I know the person that owns it, and they really wouldn't mind. Well, I mean, they won't even notice."

"Chat," she warned.

"Oh come on, just give it a chance! I promise I will leave everything just as I found it, and it's not like it's a crime. I worked really hard on this, just please come with me."

Then he threw the kitten eyes at her. Marinette sighed but walked down the few steps to join him, "Fine."

Chat smiled and led her down the rest of the way, entering through the first door, and stopping at large entryway that she was pretty sure was the penthouse of the building. She glared some more but stayed quiet as he pulled out a key and unlocked the large double doors. There was a pad for a keycard beside the door, but she supposed there was no electricity flowing through the building and he must have some sort of master key. Did he know the owners that well?

Marinette was pretty sure that taking the master key without telling the owners was some sort of crime, but her suspicions, as well as her ability to think critically, stuttered to a halt as he led her through the doors with a hand on the small of her back. The first thing she noticed was the soft lighting. She was probably right about the lack of electricity, but there were more than enough candles around the large room that she could see the small table set up for two and the large bouquet of red roses set in the center. She could see what seemed like rose petals scattered around the floor, leading more or less towards an open door that most likely led to a bedroom.

Her blush spread until the tips of her ears were burning. Unable to process the jumble of emotions flowing through her head, she fell back on teasing. "You know, it's dangerous to leave candles unattended as you hop halfway across the city."

"Marinette!"

Laughing softly at his distraught whine, she stood on tiptoes to kiss his cheek, "Sorry, Kitty, it's beautiful. I love it."

 _I love you._ It was probably too soon to use the L word out loud. Despite admitting to him that she called him "my love" in her head, she hadn't _actually_ gotten around to admitting that she loved him. After all, he called her "mate" but hadn't outright said he loved her either. She didn't want to scare him away by being too intense about her feelings too quickly. Even if she hadn't been able to hold onto her heart, she needed to make sure she didn't lose complete control of it.

"I'm glad," he kissed her forehead. "Want to sit down and eat?"

Marinette hadn't been able to control her blush, but she managed to lean into him and tuck her head on his shoulder. "Not really," she placed a soft kiss on his pulse point and felt him tense immediately.

"B- but the dinner. . ."

"I already had dinner," she smiled and placed a trail of kisses along his jaw.

"It was expensive," his voice was low and scratchy. His hands landed on her hips almost reluctantly and she could feel his fingers flex as he tried to resist kneading her.

"I could take it to go, and we can share it tomorrow," she stood on tiptoes so she could capture his earlobe between her teeth. He whined and pulled her closer but otherwise didn't react. She pulled back and stared moodily up at him, "Why are you resisting?"

"I - there's something I wanted to give you," Chat rolled his shoulders nervously. "I had it since - since the last time."

Marinette winced at the reminder of how badly she had messed everything up because of her own self-esteem issues and pulled away from him. Clasping her hands together in front of herself, she offered a small smile, "Yes?"

Chat seemed unsure of how to continue, his hands fluttering uselessly, until he reached to grab her arm and pulled her to the table. He picked up a small box and all but shoved it in her face, eyes shut tight and blush prominent on his face. Marinette carefully took the box from his hands and opened it.

It was a ring. . . it was a ring! It was beautiful rose gold ring with tiny cerulean gems in the shape of a princess crown! How was she supposed to contain her squeal of excitement? Oh wait, she couldn't!

Chat jumped at her shout, "What happened? You don't like it?"

How could he possibly think she didn't like it? She jumped and embraced him in a hug, "How could I not like it? It's perfect!" A princess crown for his princess. She elected to ignore the obvious joke in the gift. Pulling back, she smirked at him, "It's kind of a bold statement for a first date, though."

"No, it's not," he insisted. Her breath stuttered when he took her right hand and slipped the ring out of the box to place it on her ring finger. It was perfect fit, and it may or may not have been a scene pulled straight from her dreams. "Marinette," he whispered and she unconsciously leaned in to hear him better. "I love you."

Marinette felt her lips pull into a smile even before her brain finished processing his words. Her heart was beating so loudly she didn't doubt that he could hear it with his _human_ ears! She meant to reciprocate his feelings, to assure him that his heart would be safe in her keeping, but in true Marinette fashion, she somehow managed to say the exact opposite of what she meant. "But you said -" she bit her tongue to keep from repeating what he told Ladybug. Even if he seemed to be under the impression that she was friends with the heroine, that wasn't the kind of thing you told a casual acquaintance. "I mean, I thought you wouldn't love anybody but Ladybug."

Chat looked at her like she had struck him and _no, no, no_ , this was supposed to be a good night! This was supposed to be perfect! Why couldn't she ever say what she meant when it actually counted?

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean that! I just -"

"No, you're right," he spoke slowly. "I did say that once, and I meant it at the time. I loved Ladybug once, and I'm not going to deny that. But," he reached to play with the tips of her hair. "I think I've loved you for almost as long, and I just got so used to your presence and warmth that I didn't even realize it. It wasn't until I lost you that I understood that I couldn't be without you. I love you, _I love you_ , and I understand that it might be hard to believe, but I promise -"

She cut off his rambling by placing her hand over his mouth. He blinked at her in surprise and she smiled gently, "I believe you. I - that's the same way it was for me. I love you. I've loved you for a very long time, and I'm sorry that I shut you out just because I was afraid you couldn't feel the same way. I promise I won't leave you alone again."

Marinette heard herself sniffle and Chat yanked her hand off his mouth. "Why are you crying?"

She couldn't help but giggle at the panic in his tone. He really was too sweet, "It's okay, they're kind of happy tears."

Kind of, because part of it was regret over how much pain she had caused both of them for nothing. If she had waited just a little bit longer, then maybe he would have reached the conclusion that he loved her without feeling abandoned. If she had just gone on the date he had planned for their fifth anniversary, then he would have given her the ring and she would have felt a little more secure in their non-relationship. If she had just confessed as Marinette instead of being a coward and adding a third party to their arrangement, then maybe they would have reached this moment much sooner.

Marinette wiped the tears away with the palm of her hand. "I have a surprise for you too," she said, trying to get the night back on track.

His eyes flicked to her small purse, "Really?"

She smiled impishly, "Yes, but it's not in there." Removing her purse, she placed it on the table and then reached behind herself to pull down her zipper. "It's under here."

The tips of Chat's ears turned red as he watched her dress fall to the ground to reveal the white lace baby doll negligee she had slipped on under it.

"How - how long have you had that?"

"Not terribly long."

There was a moment of tense silence in which neither of them seemed to breathe, and then, like a rubber band snapping, Chat rushed forward to crash his lips against hers. Marinette responded eagerly, clutching at his shoulders and pushing her hips against his.

He pulled back heaving for breath, "You realize I'm going to have to put out all these candles, right?"

There must have been around fifty of them. "Better get started then," she pulled away from him and skipped towards the bedroom, ignoring his indignant squawk. She jumped onto the bed, dislodging the plethora of rose petals scattered across it, and immediately sighed when she felt the silk against her skin. He really did work hard for this date.

Marinette pushed herself up towards the pillows, wondering if she should pose or something. She didn't get much of a chance to think on it when Chat showed up in the now dark doorway. She smiled when he growled.

"You're unfair," he prowled towards the bed.

"Only one of us can see in the dark, Kitty," she leaned back on her elbows as he crawled over her. "Speaking of which, you seem to have missed some."

She turned his head towards the half dozen candles on the dresser. Chat frowned tightly but got up without complaint. He really _was_ too sweet, she would have to reward him well.

The room plunged into a hazy sort of darkness, weak light filtering through the ordinary curtains. It was shocking after being so used to her blackout curtains, but she supposed she wouldn't be able to see anything of any real relevance. The bed sank as he kneeled on it and then straddled her.

"I changed my mind," he informed her seriously. "You don't look like a princess, you look like a goddess."

Marinette hooked a leg around his waist and used it to flip him onto his back. Placing her hands over his chest, she could feel his heart beating frantically even through the miraculous armor. Slowly, she began to rock her hips against him, "You should start worshipping me, then."

She could hear him gulp audibly before his scratchy voice called out, "Plagg, claws in."

Used to the blinding green light by then, she managed to close her eyes before it further impaired her vision. Before she could open them, Chat tugged her down and gripped her chin, guiding her lips to his.

Mewling against him, she reached towards the center of his shirt, searching to see what kind he was wearing. And there were buttons. Of course, there were buttons! Why would he make things easier for her in the dark? Growling into the kiss, she yanked the shirt open, feeling the buttons give way and go flying.

He pulled back with a hiss, "Marinette!"

"They were in the way," she pouted.

"This shirt's expensive, how am I supposed to explain this?" There was laughter laced with his words.

She was starting to sense a theme about tonight, and it seemed to be the word expensive. Expensive food, expensive flowers, expensive sheets, expensive shirt. There was something about it that tugged at a distant memory, but she pushed it away. She didn't want to think about Chat's economic status. The only thing she wanted to focus on was that he loved her.

"Say you were overcome by religious fervor."

Chat shook with laughter, but began to pull up the ends of her negligee.

* * *

Marinette hummed contentedly as she felt Chat run a hand up her back before squeezing her shoulder. "Marinette, you can't fall asleep here."

"I'm not," she mumbled sleepily before yawning.

 _"Marinette,"_ he chided with a short laugh.

Forcing her eyes open when she felt him pull away, she realized he was lighting some candles and was already in his miraculous armor again. _When did that happen?_ Huh, maybe she _had_ been falling asleep for a moment there. Her clothes were folded neatly at the foot of the bed and she scooted down to put them on.

She winced at the sticky feeling of slipping her nice clothes over her sweat drenched skin. She'd never actually had to deal with putting clothes back on right after sex, electing to just fall right to sleep once Chat got out of bed to leave. Even when they'd had sex in the clearing the night of their one month anniversary, they had spent enough time trying to feed each other chocolates in the dark that her skin was dried by the time she put her clothes back on.

Now though, the room conserved their body heat, and the silk, though nice against her naked skin, wasn't doing her any favors. Her bangs were sticking to her forehead and she could feel her curls sticking to the back of her neck. She huffed when she realized her nice hairdo must have been destroyed in her passion. "My hair looks a mess," she pouted.

"Yeah, but a cute mess," Chat smiled at her and offered a hand to help her to her feet.

"Easy for you to say, your hair is always a mess."

"Hey, this is a stylistic choice!" he teased before leading her out of the apartment, passing her purse to her as they walked by the table. He ran back in quickly, probably to turn off the candles he had lit for her benefit and she snorted to see her chastisement had stuck so quickly.

The journey back to her home was spent in overall silence, a warm contentment settling throughout her limbs. She was surprised when he landed at the side door instead of her balcony. Marinette wondered if he was still worried that somebody was watching, but slipped off his back quietly. She doubted anybody had been there, but if they were, they would have quit after three hours of darkness in her room.

"You don't have to drop me off at the door," she turned to him with a smirk.

He almost collided into her at her sudden stop. He had obviously been intending to do just that. "I am a gentleman," he insisted. "Besides, your parents would appreciate me making sure that you get home safe."

Marinette rolled her eyes, "Nothing's going to happen to me in my own building! Besides, my parents probably don't expect me back until morning."

Chat blushed at the reminder of how _open minded_ her parents were. He seemed to fumble for words before reaching for her hand, placing a kiss on the back of it, his lips landing not so accidentally on her ring, "Next time, Princess."

Her heart warmed at the gesture and she was suddenly overcome by the desire to know who he was beneath the mask. He wouldn't have to leave before dawn if she were allowed to see who he was. But the only way she could ask him to reveal himself was by revealing herself first and. . . that didn't seem so scary anymore. He had loved Ladybug, and didn't regret doing so, and he loved Marinette now. He had loved her so completely, the person she was, and the person she could be when the occasion called for it, without even knowing it, and she felt like her heart could burst.

She licked her lips and spoke slowly, "I have another surprise for you, if you come by later today."

His cat ears twitched curiously as he stood a little straighter, "Is it another negligee? Because I can take a little longer if it's another negligee."

She laughed softly, "It's not another negligee, but I think you'll like it."

Marinette stood on tiptoes to place a quick peck against his lips before running into the building, erupting with laughter. She managed to control it by the time she opened her front door, being mindful to not disturb her parents. They probably _would_ appreciate knowing she was back safely, but there was no need to wake them up just to tell them she was going to sleep. She had just flicked on the light in her room when the knocking started on her skylight.

Tikki poked her head out of the purse with a sigh, "Didn't he _just_ see you?"

"Hide, Tikki," Marinette giggled, patting the kwami's head down, before skipping to the skylight. He was probably displeased that she hadn't given him a longer kiss goodbye. Teasing could go either way with Chat. He might accept it with a blush and a stammer, or he might try to fluster her in revenge. In this case, she would be quite pleased to give him what he wanted.

"Cha -" his name stuck in her throat as her smile fell. That. . . was not Chat. From this angle, she couldn't see their face, shrouded in darkness as the ambient lighting fell on their back. But she could recognize a feminine body and fluffy tail. "Rena Rouge?"

"Not quite," a sultry voice purred as they leaned down. That was most definitely the fox miraculous armor, but the hair was wrong, straight and sleek instead of curly and fluffed. Olive green eyes stared into hers before a purple light flickered around them. "Hello, Marinette."

"V - Volpina?" Marinette froze on the steps, unsure of what to do. Should she try to make a break for it, try to outrun her and transform? _Could_ she outrun her in her civilian form? Her grip on the stairs tightened. Was Chat still around? Would he hear her if she shouted?

"What - what are you doing here?" she asked, trying to buy herself some time. It was obvious why she was there. Hawk Moth had obviously ordered her to go capture Chat Noir's girlfriend to hold a hostage negotiation. His girlfriend or his miraculous. Marinette bit the inside of her cheek, determined to not let that happen.

"I'm going to free you," Volpina answered, surprising the designer. That. . . was not what she expected. Was that why Lila was akumatized? What could she think she was freeing her from? "I am sorry about this, by the way."

Invisible hands gripped her arms and a third clamped over her mouth to stop her startled shout. Was this an illusion? No, it was _very_ real! Illusions couldn't hurt you, but. . . occasionally, Rena could manipulate an akuma's mind into thinking nothing was there while the others snuck up on it. Marinette tried to pull herself back, happy to fall painfully on the floor if it meant she could get out of the iron grip, but was pulled through the skylight despite her struggles.

The only comfort she could take was that Tikki was still in the purse slung over her shoulder. She was going to find a way out of this. She was going to save herself. She wasn't going to be the reason Chat gave up his miraculous. She _wasn't!_

* * *

 **A/N:** So yeah, Lila's bi and totally into Marinette. She actually got akumatized right after the video came out, but Hawk Moth decided to wait to see if Chat _actually_ cared about her and wasn't saying sweet things to get into her pants, as one does. And since she doesn't actually want to hurt Marinette, she was ok to wait. **She's actually been Volpina this entire time, and just been using illusions to hide her costume** so that's the "flicker" Marinette saw in the bathroom.

I was super lucky to go to a super chill high school where no one got bullied or harassed for their life choices. **So, I just based the lycée on that** , don't at me about how unrealistic teenagers not harassing her is, because it's LITERALLY based on reality.

 **Adrien watches too much anime and you will take Secret Florist Adrien from my cold, dead hands!** Pink hydrangeas mean "thank you for your understanding." Red tulips mean "a declaration of love." And, of course, red roses mean "true love."

This chapter's title comes from **Despacito (Slowly) by Luis Fonsi ft. Daddy Yankee** (there is no other version, IDK what you're talking about) because _of course_ I had to include that song in a smut fic! The full lyric is "Let me whisper sweet nothings into your ear, so that you remember if I'm not with you." I had to translate it myself because the "official" English translation is GARBAGE! They know that literal translations don't always work, right? Like, this is why no one takes linguistic majors seriously. You had one job! And you messed it up, SMDH.

As always, let me know what you liked, didn't like, and what could use improvement!

~ Destiny's Sweet Melody


	21. Though Hell Should Bar The Way

**A/N:** Sorry for the foreboding chapter title. Also, sorry for everything else. I'm gonna be honest, I'm a little afraid of how y'all are going to react to this chapter. I'm not much of a planner - even though I know the general plot points before I start typing, I like to let the story grow organically and go where it will. **This isn't _exactly_ how I saw this going, but it felt forced to change it, so I kept it**. Here's hoping I can pull it off!

Illusions are genuinely the most OP superpower ever, and I have _never_ seen a franchise that uses it to its full potential.

 **To GuestXO:** Glad you like the song choices, they're kind of all over the place, lol. Hey, when you're a parent, you can either teach your child to make good choices to the best of your abilities or stay up till dawn just to fight with them when they get home. They seem like the kind of parents that understand that to me. I wanted to bring Lila more into the story before now, but Alya only ever drops truth bombs, so her teasing about it should have been enough lol.

 **Warnings:** WAY more than canon-typical violence, though nothing graphic. Blood. Mentions of dissociation.

* * *

 **All Your Love Is Revenge**

 **Ch. 21: Though Hell Should Bar the Way**

"You disgust me," Plagg muttered mutinously from the desk where he ate his camembert.

Adrien barely heard him, the goofy smile on his face refusing to abate as he laid on his bed, arms and legs spread as he gazed dazedly at the roof. Dawn had broken long ago and he hadn't slept a wink but he wasn't tired at all. It felt like he was floating on a cloud, like his veins were filled with sunshine, like he was so filled with happiness he could burst.

Marinette _loved_ him. She loved the mess of a human being that he truly was that he had only ever managed to be in her room with a mask on. Not the perfect caricature of a person his father had forced him to masquerade as, or the untouchable, unaffected hero he pretended to be in front of akumas. She loved _Adrien_ , the core of who he was, mask or no mask. It was enough to make him feel less unsure of how she would feel if she found out who he was without the miraculous armor.

It had been. . . painful when she had pushed Adrien away when he kissed her at the club. And, okay, that was his bad. He shouldn't have just jumped her. As far as she was aware, he was her friend that had never so much as kissed her cheek until that moment and then he was _kissing her._ It wasn't his finest moment, but he had worked very hard on his speech as to why she should give a relationship with him a try and then she hadn't even _heard it!_ So, he had gotten frustrated and just kissed her, because he had been kissing her for five months and he hadn't imagined he could actually miss the way somebody's lips felt like against his before.

When he kissed her, it felt like coming home, like his heart had suddenly jumpstarted again after being dead for decades. Feeling her respond to the kiss was even better because if he could be with her as Adrien, it would be easier. No masks or lies or excuses, just them. And then she had pushed him away and it felt like the ground had opened up under him.

He had thought that was the end of everything. If she didn't want to be with Chat and didn't want to be with Adrien, then he had no chance to be with her. He had followed her almost instinctually, not even expecting to find the courage to speak to her, to ask for one more chance. Until he saw her walk blindly into a dark alley and heard a slimy voice call out to her mockingly. Then he had transformed without thinking, not even stopping to consider that he was in a relatively populated area. The rest, as they say, was history.

She _did_ say Adrien was a super hot model that she would have happily made out with were it not for her feelings for Chat, so he didn't have to worry about disappointing her from an aesthetic view.

The only real problem was the whole _secret_ identity thing. It was secret for a reason. Although he didn't doubt most people assumed Marinette knew Chat's civilian identity by now, none of the other miraculous holders did. He wasn't sure _how_ Rena Rouge had found out about the blackout curtains, but she did. Which meant that Carapace did. And Queen B found out when she saw him running from the turtle miraculous holder, who was hurling obscenities at him because _how_ could he have sex with such a nice girl and not even let her see his face?

The only one he hadn't had direct contact with yet was Ladybug, but he knew she trusted him to keep the secret no matter what. She didn't even allow the miraculous holders to tell _each other_ \- he still maintained Rena and Carapace had shared their identities when they started dating - and had never so much as indicated she had any intention of changing that policy. Ladybug trusted him, and he wasn't about to betray that trust.

But. . .

Marinette was his girlfriend, his love, his mate, his everything. He was fairly certain she was the person he was going to be spending the rest of his life with. And, _fine_ , he had thought that about Ladybug not so long ago, but this was different! He was pretty sure he had been technically cohabitating with Marinette already, so it wasn't just an absurd fantasy of his. All that was really missing was a ceremony to make it official, which was going to take a few years because even he knew better than rushing into marriage. But the point was that this was it for him. Marinette was going to be his wife someday, and he would rather propose as Adrien than Chat.

He would also appreciate being able to have sex with the lights on more frequently. He wanted to be able to sleep beside her and wake up with her in his arms and not worry about whether he woke up in time to cover his face. He'd like to take advantage of the fact that her parents wouldn't mind if she didn't come back until the next morning.

Adrien sighed, reaching the only conclusion he could possibly reach, "Plagg, I'm going to ask Ladybug to let me reveal myself to Marinette."

The cat kwami snorted, "I don't think she'd mind that much." The blond turned his head to raise an eyebrow. Plagg shrugged, "She's a romantic, after all."

"Really?" Adrien drawled. That was not a word he'd use to describe the superheroine. She was caring and loving, but she wasn't _romantic._ For all that she used her crush as a reason to not even consider Chat's feelings, she never seemed to care about any boys or girls in that way, and never did more than scoff at Chat's flirtations. The most romantic thing she ever did was declare herself to him - which was still painful to think about - but even then she was brusque and to the point.

"In fact, I think you might be surprised soon," the bad luck god snickered as if he knew something the blond didn't.

"Wait, surprise!" He shot up into a sitting position, remembering Marinette's promise of another surprise for him. She had said it wasn't another negligee but he wouldn't be surprised if it was something sex related. Marinette was surprisingly voracious when it came to her carnality. Either way, she had promised he would like it, and he was inclined to believe her. Exactly how early could Chat get away with going to visit her?

"She said _later_ today," Plagg reminded him, as if sensing his thoughts.

"But she didn't say to _night_ ," Adrien grinned.

"You haven't even slept," the kwami whined.

"But you have." Adrien could sleep at Marinette's anyway. "Plagg," the catlike creature sighed at his words. "Claws out!"

Chat reached into his mini-fridge for the food Marinette had left behind in the penthouse and stuffed it into a plastic bag. He had left everything exactly as he found it, despite knowing that his father wouldn't even care if he found out somebody had been there. He had bought the plot of land and built the apartment complex as an extra revenue source at the behest of André Bourgeois as part of some sort of business arrangement they had going on, but it had been ready for habitation for a year and he had never opened it to the public. His father should be glad that somebody was putting it to use. . . but he should probably never do that again.

That was another reason to reveal himself to Marinette. He could take her to a nice hotel for their anniversary instead of trying to find places where they could sneak around.

Sundays were the only days Adrien had free - usually - so he didn't feel too guilty about sending a quick text to Nathalie saying he would be spending the day with Nino and slipping out through his window. It was still early morning, but Marinette would wake up long enough to open the skylight and then force him into bed to cuddle.

The Dupain-Cheng bakery was already open for business, but he didn't expect Marinette to be helping, especially given her habit of sleeping in. Which was why he was surprised to see her bed empty through the open shutters on her skylight. The light was on, so she must be up already.

Chat made to knock on it and hope she was nearby, when a particularly strong gust of wind swept by and the skylight moved the barest of centimeters. His brows furrowed, something in his gut unsettling. Marinette didn't leave her skylight unlocked unless she was propping it open. Brushing the feeling off, he lifted the hatch and slowly climbed in.

"Marinette?"

Was she showering, maybe? Or having breakfast? Shrugging, he decided to head down into the apartment. Her parents didn't seem to mind his presence, were welcoming in fact, to his great surprise, so he didn't worry about overstepping any bounds.

Nothing. No one in the kitchen, and not a single sound to be heard. No shower or humming or heartbeats. The hairs on the back of his neck stood as _something_ unsettled him. He wasn't sure what. There was nothing off about the scene, with the exception of Marinette being out of bed so early, but maybe she had been filled with the same sort of energy he was.

That must be it. She must be downstairs helping her parents in the bakery. That might be a boundary he shouldn't breach, though. His masked persona's relationship with Marinette was basically an open secret, but that didn't mean he could go around flaunting it. Plausible deniability might be the only thing keeping her safe.

He placed the bag of food on the countertop and walked out of the apartment. Sneaking down the stairs, he peeked through the door to the bakery's kitchen. Tom was busy at the oven and he could hear Sabine's voice talking to customers out at front. But no Marinette. She was probably at the front, helping her mother, but the weird feeling would _not_ go away. He needed to see her, just a glimpse of her, to assure himself that she was okay. He knew she was, he just. . . wanted to be sure.

"Psst," he hissed quietly. "Monsieur Dupain." Marinette's parents insisted he call them by their first names, but it was still weird.

Tom turned to him with a quirked brow and an easy smile, "Good morning, Chat, nice to see you. Are you dropping off Marinette?"

 _What?_

Chat meant to ask the question out loud, but his voice stuck in his throat. His _breath_ was stuck in his throat. Was he breathing? That didn't matter! What did Tom mean by was he dropping off Marinette? He had dropped her off hours ago, had seen her enter the building, had heard her laughing all the way to her apartment. She was _home._ She was _safe._ Nothing was supposed to happen to her in her own building!

"Chat?"

Marinette wouldn't have snuck out. She only ever did that when she was with him, and they hadn't needed to sneak out since her parents found out. She had to be here somewhere. She had to be! Maybe she was hiding from him to play a trick on him. It was a mean trick to play but he didn't think he'd even be angry when she showed herself, he'd be so relieved.

"Are you okay?"

Chat startled when Tom laid his hand on his shoulder. He hadn't even noticed the large man move, and he could feel himself trembling beneath the firm grip. His fists clenched and he grit his teeth, looking away from Tom's sympathetic gaze.

"I -" How was he supposed to explain this? Hadn't he promised he would keep her safe? How was he going to explain that he had been so flustered by the idea of another "surprise" that he hadn't even walked her to the door? He should have insisted. He was a hero, the least he could do was walk his girlfriend to the door!

 _This is my fault._ He couldn't even insist to himself that she was fine. There was a voice in the back of his head that knew exactly what had happened, that knew it would happen since that damned video came out. Taking a ragged breath, he forced himself to look Tom in the eyes, "I'm looking for Marinette. I dropped her off at around one."

Chat saw the moment the older man understood what his words meant. The light seemed to go out of his eyes and he pulled his hand back as if burned. He ran towards the store front shouting for his wife.

 _This is my fault._

Sabine let out a wordless shout, something harsh and angry and painful all at once. He half expected her to charge in and attack him for endangering her daughter, but neither of them walked back through the door. Probably couldn't even stand the sight of him at the moment.

 _This is my fault,_ he thought, clawing at his chest, as if that would make it easier to breathe, or make his heart stop hurting. _But I'm going to fix it._

* * *

He could hear Alya muttering something along the lines of "it's too early in the morning for this bullshit" through the door. The tired, angry face she was making quickly morphed into one of surprise when she saw who was knocking on her door so frantically it almost came off the hinges.

"Chat Noir?" She blinked rapidly and wiped at her glasses as if to make sure it was really him.

"I need you to put a message to the other miraculous holders on the Ladyblog. I need to contact them." His tone was rushed and clipped, no time for charm or formalities. Not for the first time, he was furious at the 'no sharing identities' rule. They had no way to contact each other unless transformed, and of course none of them were transformed when he needed them!

"I. . . sure, I guess. What's this about?"

Chat bit back a curse at her curiosity. Of course, Alya would want to know. Not only had none of them done anything like this before, but it was _Alya._ She would ask for all the secrets of the universe, if she could.

Trying to keep his patience, he placed his hands on her shoulders, claws just a bit closer to her skin than they would be under normal circumstances, and stared her in the eye. She seemed startled by his intensity.

"You can't tell anyone, okay? Don't even put it in the message." Alya nodded quickly in agreement, and any other moment he would worry about the fear in her eyes. "Marinette was taken. I need to find her and I need help."

The blood drained from the blogger's face, "W- wait."

"I can't!" he snapped and pulled his hands back to run them through his hair in frustration. "I need to find her. It's my fault and I - just, please! Put the message. Tell them to find me where we usually meet up, they'll understand. But don't say why. Whoever took her, it'd be best if they don't know we know yet."

Whoever? As if it wasn't obviously Hawk Moth!

"Right, I'll - right away," Alya nodded determinedly and pulled out her phone as she walked back into her apartment.

Chat turned away from the now closed door and took off running. He felt so useless! He had never really needed to track down somebody that wasn't leaving a trail of destruction in their wake. Even though he could sort of smell her scent - or his scent on her, or whatever - it faded in all directions once he left her room. The only real clue he had was the fucking unlocked skylight, which just confirmed that there was an akuma behind this. An akuma that was clever and subtle enough to take Marinette without a sound, without a fight.

He did his best to ignore the refrain of _my fault, my fault, my fault_ as he hurried to the roof of the building that the miraculous holders met up on for patrols. Hosting a pity party for himself wasn't going to save Marinette and it wasn't going to help him become effective. He needed to calm down and focus, it was just _hard._ Every inch of his body ached to. . . to hold Marinette. . . or tear apart the akuma. Whichever happened first. And then the other.

"Chat Noir!" His feet had barely landed on the roof when Rena's voice rang out. She all but slid onto the roof, breath heaving and face red with exertion. "I came as soon as I could! What do - what's wrong?"

Chat wondered what Alya had typed up to make Rena so worried. At least she was here quick.

"My - my girlfriend, Marinette, she -" he was interrupted by the appearance of Carapace.

"I'm here! What do we know?" The turtle's voice seemed panicked, and Chat really hoped Alya had done as he said and avoided mentioning any kidnappings.

"Chat was about to explain," Rena answered quickly. "Something about your girlfriend?"

He wondered if Ladybug and Queen B would be here just as quick. He didn't want to have to repeat himself, but he didn't want to wait for them either. Every moment counted, wasn't that what they always said about kidnappings? He opened his mouth to explain, when -

"Yoo-hoo!" B's high-pitched voice heralded her coming seconds before she landed. Hands on her hips, she sighed dramatically. "You'd better have a good reason for making me leave my room before nine on a Sunday morning, you dumb cat."

"Marinette's been taken by an akuma!" he yelled, tired of being interrupted. Silence followed his declaration.

Rena's chest heaved as she took a calming breath, "Explain."

"I went to visit her this morning and her parents thought she was with me, but I had already dropped her off," he explained quickly.

"How long has she been missing?" Carapace asked, staring Chat down. "You were the last person to see her, so we'll use that as the time of disappearance."

He had been the last person to see her. She had been taken from right under his nose. "One," he answered dully. "I dropped her off at around one, and went to visit her around eight and she was gone. I - she didn't want me to drop her off at her door, but I could hear her laughing. I mean, it's not like I can hear through solid walls, but she was laughing so loud I could hear her. She made it to her apartment. She made it to her room, the light was on," he listed the facts and was glad to finally have something to focus on.

"The skylight was unlocked, she wouldn't just leave it unlocked. But it wasn't broken, she opened it. . ."

"She knew them?" B cocked her head curiously.

 _Or thought she did._ If Marinette heard somebody knocking on her skylight, she would think it was Chat and open without bothering to check. His stomach revolted at the idea that his being Chat Noir was partly responsible for this. If she had a _normal_ boyfriend, if she was dating Adrien, then she would have been wary.

"She would have fought back," Chat insisted. "When she saw it was an akuma, she would have yelled or ran or thrown something."

"Maybe they were invisible," Rena offered. "She heard the knocking, didn't see anybody, so she stepped out and was taken."

Possible, but. . . "Vanisher already existed," B spoke what he was thinking. "And I've never known Hawk Moth to repeat akumas."

"It wouldn't make sense for an invisible akuma to attack Marinette," Carapace agreed. "The type of akuma is usually tied to the reason for the akumatization, and an akuma after Marinette would probably be because of. . ."

It was kind of him to try to not throw salt on an open wound. "Me," Chat finished.

"A jealous fangirl?" B wondered.

"But why now?" Chat growled. "Everybody already knows! It's been two weeks! Why would they suddenly get jealous enough to be akumatized _now?_ It's not like we've been going around publicizing it!"

Rena startled suddenly, drawing attention to herself immediately. "I - what if, what if somebody overheard Marinette talking about your date last night?"

"What?"

"Rena," Carapace hissed.

"What do you mean?" Chat insisted.

Carapace frowned at his girlfriend, but she shook her head. "I don't care! If it means life or death for Marinette, then I don't care about my secret identity!" The turtle soldier crossed his arms but nodded at the fox. "I go to school with Marinette," she admitted and the shock of the revelation would set in later, he was sure. "I heard her say she was going on a date with you, and there was someone else. She - she has a crush on Marinette."

"Who?" Chat demanded, grasping her shoulders harshly. He saw the same fear he had seen in Alya's eyes in Rena's, and he was distantly aware of Carapace yelling at him to back off. "Who is it?"

"Lila, her name is Lila Rossi."

"Volpina?" Chat remembered her, but only barely. She had never approached Adrien again after Ladybug embarrassed her, and they never shared many classes. He knew her by reputation; the "hot chick," the one that puts out on the first date, the one that doesn't even date, the girl that dumped Kim, the flutist, the loner, the liar. Never had he heard about her having a crush on Marinette.

"Lila was Volpina?" Carapace questioned.

"That means she has my powers," Rena clarified. "That's how she got Marinette. With an illusion!"

"Okay, so how do we find her?" B tapped her foot impatiently.

"The whole point of this has to be to get Chat Noir's miraculous," Carapace explained. "Which means she's going to get his attention eventually. When she does, we can follow her to Marinette."

"I can't wait that long!" Chat turned to pace across the roof.

"You may not have to," Rena breathed and when he spun to face her, she was looking into the distance.

Black clouds danced in the distance, rising from a building that was consumed by flames. Chat grit his teeth and launched towards the fire. It was obviously a trap, it was probably an illusion, but if there was even the _tiniest_ chance that Marinette was there, that she was in danger, then he had to go. Crashing through a window, he rolled to a stop on the wooden floor of an unknown apartment, crouched on all fours.

The flames were still there, they felt so real, but nothing seemed to be burning. Curious, he reached a tip of a claw towards the nearest wall consumed by the fire, and nothing. It wasn't real. It wasn't on fire, he had broken somebody's window and it didn't even -

"Chat!"

His blood froze at the anguished scream, "Marinette!"

He moved without thinking towards the sound, breaking the bedroom door to splinters. His heart stuttered when he saw Marinette huddled in a corner, knees pulled to her chest and face buried behind her legs. Reaching out for her with a shaky smile, he called, "Don't worry, Princess, the flames aren't real, you're going to be fine."

"Don't worry?" she whimpered without looking up at him. "How am I not supposed to worry? Is this what it's going to be like being with you?"

It felt like she had stabbed him in the chest, "Marinette?"

She still didn't lift her head to look at him, "I can't! I can't be with you if this is going to happen every time I let my guard down!"

"You don't - you don't mean that," he whispered so quietly he doubted she could even hear him.

"You don't even love me enough to show me your face! If you actually cared about me you would give up your miraculous!"

Chat snapped his jaw shut, his fists clenching as he glared, "You're not Marinette."

"Oh," she gasped, hair changing from blue-black to brown and growing in length. "Was that too much?"

Volpina lifted her masked face to smile meanly at him, blue dress turning into a familiar uniform as she stood.

"Marinette's not a coward," he reminded himself. "She wouldn't sit there huddling in fear, and she wouldn't ask me to give up my miraculous to save herself."

"She's selfless," Volpina agreed. "She's much too good for you."

"She is," Chat growled. "But she still loves me and not you."

 _Rena was right,_ he realized as Volpina glared at him darkly. It was a hateful, violent look. One he hadn't seen often, not even fighting akumas, but he wondered if he wore one similar every time he thought about Marinette's first love. She had a crush on Marinette, might even love her if the way she seemed to hate him was any indication. So why. . .

"Why did you take Marinette if you care about her?"

" _Because_ I care about her! I'm going to free her from you, so she won't be in any more danger."

 _That doesn't make any sense!_ "You're the one that put her in danger!"

"She's safe for now. Give me your miraculous and she goes home."

Chat growled, raising his arm to summon a Cataclysm.

"I'm not alone, Chat Noir," Volpina glared. "Every moment I waste with you is a moment that she's left alone with a small army of _men._ Men that won't hesitate to hurt her if she so much as complains about the smell."

Chat lowered his arm and glared before grinning viciously, "I'm not alone either."

Volpina suddenly went flying back, chin abruptly bruised, and Rena appeared in the spot before her, arm outstretched in a punch. "You took my friend using my powers. I'm going to kick your ass!"

Eyes wide, the akuma raised her flute to her mouth and rolled at the same time as Chat and Rena jumped towards her. In an instant there was only air before them, a slamming door informing them that the now invisible Volpina had left the apartment. Chat winced as he looked around at the damage he had caused. At least it wasn't on fire. The Miraculous Ladybug should fix it, anyway.

Which reminded him, "Where's Ladybug?"

"I haven't heard from her," Rena shrugged before a beeping interrupted her. "I'm gonna have to go recharge, but tell the others what you learned." At his confused look, she sighed, "She said they'd hurt Marinette if she complained about the smell. That was a pretty specific complaint to have. Which means she has to be somewhere that smells bad, like a sewer or a garbage dump or something. It's not much, but it's a lead."

"It's enough," Chat smiled. It was hope.

* * *

It was already midday before he finally caught a break. Four hours of searching without success, and without another attack from Volpina, leaving them to try to find Marinette based on "somewhere that smells bad." Plagg had already needed to recharge five times already, exhausted from all the running Chat was doing, but he was being surprisingly understanding about it. No complaining or snarky comments, just careful optimism and kind words.

"It's not your fault, kid."

"Marinette's been targeted before, it was bound to happen again with or without you."

"It's not even the first akuma that targets her because of a crush!"

"You're not the first Chat Noir to get their lover kidnapped." Adrien had asked if the other Chat got their lover back. Plagg refused to answer.

He would have appreciated the snarky comments. _Anything_ to take his mind off his worry. In order to search all the possible hideouts they could think of in as short a time as possible, they had decided to split up, dividing Paris in four pieces since Ladybug had yet to show. It left him with a lot of alone time, which let him think about all his doubts with far more intensity than he would like.

Volpina had been right, in a way. Marinette didn't deserve to be in constant danger just because of him. Not that breaking up with her crossed his mind for more than a few seconds. Not only was he sure that she was stubborn enough to simply refuse to break up with him "for her own good", but he was selfish enough to keep her by his side despite everything. He wouldn't be able to handle another separation, and he was pretty sure she wouldn't either.

It would be easier if she could be with Adrien. The world would believe she had broken up with Chat and they could still be together. It would be for her safety, and so that akumas wouldn't have a weapon to use against Chat Noir, Ladybug would understand. If she ever showed up. He wasn't sure if she simply hadn't read the Ladyblog, or if she had taken a day trip out of the city, but no matter how many messages he sent to the spotted hero, he never received a response.

He landed on the roof of an old fish cannery, the building long since abandoned but still reeking of fish. It was one of the last places he could think of in his area, and if it turned out to be a bust he would have to wait for word from the others, or another attack from Volpina. He walked towards the broken skylight and, sensing movement, crouched to the ground.

Peeking over the edge, he tensed and pulled back. A small army, she had said. She wasn't kidding. From the quick look he'd seen somewhere around fifty men. Excessive for Marinette alone, but for Chat Noir and the other miraculous holders? He sighed, unsure of how to go about this. The men were just men. Hired thugs, not akumas. He wasn't sure he was allowed to fight them as Chat Noir, and he had no chance as Adrien.

It seemed strange that Hawk Moth would reach out to organized crime suddenly, but given that Volpina had already been defeated, and back when there were only two of them, he may have felt he had no other choice. The holder of the butterfly miraculous must be adaptable if nothing else, and he wouldn't let such a perfect opportunity to get one of the miraculouses he had been trying to get for years just pass him by.

Pulling out his baton, he sent his location to the others, praying that Ladybug would get there soon to purify the akuma. Carefully leaning over the edge again, his cat ears twitched as he strained to pick up any sound. It was weird, with so many people walking around down there, he should be covering his ears from annoyance.

Eyes narrowed, he observed the men carefully and felt his eyes widen when he realized it. The vast majority of men were walking in a single file line in a complex but noticeable pattern, like NPCs in a videogame. It was an illusion! Chat tensed, wondering if Volpina knew he was there already or if she had it up as a security measure.

"Don't point that at her!" Volpina screeched suddenly.

Chat dared to lean over a little more, but couldn't see the akuma or Marinette. What were they pointing at her that would make Volpina angry? Chat felt his claws scratching against the roof, but forced himself to wait for the others. He couldn't go in there without a plan, this was too important to mess up by being impulsive.

"What do you want from me?" a gruff voice demanded. "We already tried tying her up and she still tried to escape twice!"

A smile tugged at Chat's lips. He _knew_ Marinette wouldn't have gone without a fight. His fierce warrior princess could probably have rescued herself were it not for the illusion of an army surrounding her.

"If you can't keep one girl from escaping, then you're not doing your job right!" Volpina said scathingly.

"You do _your_ job right," the same man, obviously the leader of the hired guns, shot back. "Trap Chat Noir. _Now._ "

Volpina snarled wordlessly, but he could hear her stomp away and then a door slam. Leaving Marinette alone with the mercenaries. Chat closed his eyes and forced himself to breathe deeply. The others would be there soon. Together, they would come up with a plan to rescue her unscathed. Everything would be fine, he just had to be patient.

His claws dug into the cement and his eyes snapped open when he heard a whimper. He still couldn't get sight of Marinette when he leaned over, but he could see at least three men huddled around something in a corner. They must have been real, but he couldn't be certain they were the only ones.

There was another whimper and the something in the middle of the huddle shifted.

"Don't touch the goods," the head mercenary drawled lazily.

Chat saw red, he couldn't explain it any other way. He could have waited for the others, _should have_ waited for the others, but that was his mate being surrounded by evil men that were _touching_ her. With a wild growl, he launched himself through the hole in the glass, landing in the center of the marching men. His baton was already in his hand by the time he realized what he was doing.

There was no turning back at that point. Extending his baton, he swiped at the marching men all at once in one wild swing. There were only four men left, the three standing around Marinette, and one sitting on a crate.

Marinette practically vibrated at the sight of him and seemed to call his name, but there was a gag around her mouth. Her arms and legs seemed to be unbound, but one of the thugs had a grip on her arm, holding her in front of him like a shield.

Chat hissed, "Marinette."

She always had the most expressive eyes. She didn't seem scared at all, just happy to see him. He noticed she was still wearing the same dress from their date, her hair still an adorable mess, and he sucked his teeth. She really _had_ been taken out from under his nose!

A chirp sounded throughout the room, and the leader held a walkie-talkie to his mouth, "He's here."

The blond narrowed his eyes, "You know I'm going to take her from here."

"Sure, but are you going to take her alive?" Chat lifted his baton to attack and the mercenary held up a hand. "Move, you idiot," he hissed to one of the men in front of Marinette and Chat finally got a full view of her. And the gun held to her side.

"You know how this goes: the girl or the miraculous. Who do you love more?"

Chat felt his breath stutter, the question cutting him to the quick. Marinette's big, blue eyes were screaming at him, but he already knew what she would want him to choose anyway. She was selfless, she would want him to leave her behind because being Chat Noir was more important to the city and the world at large than being in love. But. . . who did he love more? Marinette or being Chat Noir? Marinette or keeping Plagg safe? Marinette or the world?

Maybe he wasn't cut out to be a hero, if his girlfriend was willing to sacrifice herself but he couldn't bear the thought of losing her. He loved Plagg, he loved being Chat Noir, and he certainly didn't want the world to be destroyed in whatever Hawk Moth was planning. But he couldn't be without Marinette. He couldn't leave her to die when it was within his ability to save her.

The designer yelled something angrily behind her gag, but he only smiled gently at her. Oh, so she had figured it out already?

 _I could save you both_ , he stared longingly at his ring. He could give up the ring right now and then get it back once the others got there. It just had to be for a little while, just to get her to safety. A comforting feeling of understanding flowed through him and it was so obviously _Plagg_ that he had to fight back tears. He could do it, it wasn't the ideal way to reveal himself, but it was the only solution he could find.

Breathing deeply, he placed the baton back in its sheath, and wrapped his hand around his miraculous. He could do it, he could, all it would take was a little tug. His heart beat rapidly against his ribcage, blood rushing through his ears. Now, he needed to -

 _Bang!_

Chat's heartbeat dropped to zero, his breath stuck in his throat as his mind went blank. He could vaguely hear the head mercenary yelling abuses over the ringing in his ears.

 _Marinette?_

The gun was on the floor. The men were fighting amongst themselves, not even paying attention to the girl between them.

 _Princess?_

Her knees buckled as she swayed, head bowed as she held her hands to her side. He could see her shaking, her hands trembling uncontrollably as she tried to stop the flow of blood coming out of her. There was so much, so much blood, her pretty dress quickly becoming stained by it. When she looked up at him, her eyes were indescribably sad. He saw her mouth move beneath the gag, it seemed like his name, just before she collapsed to the ground with a thud.

 _Mine. . . my mate!_

There was something in between him and Marinette, and that could not stand. Reaching for his baton, he swung as he charged. Something cracked beneath his grip and he wondered why it felt so pleasing to hear. Another crack, followed by a gurgling sound. He thought he heard somebody scream, but he couldn't be sure. He thought it sounded like "mercy," but what would that have to do with anything? Marinette was _right there_ and all he had to do was _break_ through the troublesome, talking barrier to get to her.

With a final wheeze, the barrier finally gave in and he was kneeling at her side in an instant. She was pale, but her eyes were still open, looking up at him worriedly. Why would she be worried? He was with her now. Carefully, he cut the gag off her and she took a harsh breath.

"Chat," she whimpered, her hands still clutched to her side. "My purse."

He smiled gently at her nonsensical worries. A quick look around revealed it was hanging off a nearby crate. "It's right over there, do you want me to get it?" He made to move but stopped when she finally moved a hand to grasp at his arm. Why was her hand wet?

"Not right now, just stay, please," her hand slipped down to twine with his. "I'm sorry."

"Why would you be sorry?" Chat leaned down to press his forehead against hers. "You didn't -" wait "- didn't do -" _my fault, my fault, my fault_ "- anything wrong." Why was her hand so wet?

"Marinette!" Chat startled and pulled back in time to see Volpina run to kneel at Marinette's other side. "No, no, no, this wasn't supposed to happen. I'm so sorry!"

Chat blinked at the despair in her tone. Why was Marinette's hand so wet? Why was she so pale? Why was her dress red? Why was the red color spreading?

"You!" Volpina shoved her flute into Chat's face, wincing as the familiar outline of a butterfly hovered over her face, purple energy sparking angrily off it. "Break it! The akuma's in there, take it, purify it, save her!"

Chat blinked slowly. There was a gun. They were going to kill Marinette so he gave them his ring, except. . .

Except he was still wearing his ring, and Marinette was on the ground. Bleeding. She was bleeding. Because she got shot, because - _my fault, my fault, my fault_ \- he was too slow. Growling, he ripped the flute from the brunette's hand and smashed it against the ground once, twice, three times, the wood splintering as the violet butterfly fluttered out. Volpina was covered in dark bubbles before Lila lay unconscious before him.

But Marinette. . . she was still awake, still staring at him longingly. "I'm sorry," she repeated.

Tears filled Chat's eyes, "It's not -" _It's my fault. It's all my fault._

"Chat! Mari!"

Oh, _there_ were Rena and the others. Except still no Ladybug. He could hear B squeal in horror, and Carapace order his girlfriend to capture the akuma before it fluttered away, but no Ladybug.

"Don't worry, Marinette," he gripped her hand tighter and brushed her hair out of her eyes, "Ladybug will be here soon and she'll fix everything."

She surprised him by frowning at his words, "I'm - I'm here. I'm sorry, I'm here."

His brow furrowed, she wasn't making any sense. She must have been delirious, "Don't talk, just hold on."

"Call an ambulance or something," B shrieked and he heard Carapace offer to do so.

Marinette's purse fell off the crate with a thud, seemingly out of nowhere, but he didn't care. Even if there was another invisible akuma, he didn't care.

"Marinette?" A small, tinkling voice cried out and he turned to see a small being poke its head out of the purse. A small, red, ladybug-like kwami, was coming out of Marinette's purse.

 _No._

He felt the tentative touch of Marinette's other hand on his cheek. She smiled weakly up at him, her eyes filling with tears. "I'm sorry."

 _No, no, no!_ She couldn't be Ladybug. She _couldn't._ Ladybug was going to come save her. She was going to use the Miraculous Ladybug healing wave and make it so that Marinette never got shot. He placed his hand against the wound she had let go of in favor of touching his cheek. Ladybug was going to fix this! She was going to - going to -

Marinette's chest heaved for breath. "My love, I lo- love you," she whispered, her hand falling from his cheek.

Her eyes closed, and everything felt like it faded into nothing.

* * *

 **A/N:** Long chapter is long! So, I thought to myself, what is the worst possible way a reveal can happen, and this is what I came up with! _Sorry._ I already wrote a fic where they have the chillest reveal ever, so y'all get stuck with this.

I had to make a choice as to how Adrien would react to Marinette getting shot, and I decided that he's been through so much loss in canon and this fic, that his brain would just try to reject it completely.

 **I don't THINK any akumas have had repeated powers,** but (and I know I'm in the minority) I actually liked Lila as Volpina. And I just love the illusions, even though _I_ didn't use it to its full potential either, shame on me. Also her object this time around was the flute she uses in the orchestra.

This chapter's title doesn't come from a song, it comes from **The Highwayman by Alfred Noyes** , because I chose it for a reason, even though I didn't think it was going to be _this_ accurate. The full line is "Look for me by moonlight; watch for me by moonlight; I'll come to thee by moonlight, though hell should bar the way!"

 **Don't kill me, guys!** At least, not until the end of the story, which should be in about two (or three, depending) chapters. I'm weak, and I could never write a tragedy. Especially not in a longfic. I didn't drag this out for this long just so it can end _sad!_

Let me know what you liked, didn't like, and what could use improvement!

~ Destiny's Sweet Melody


	22. Even If The Future Becomes Invisible

**A/N:** I'm so happy that there was mostly positive reactions to last chapter. Although, considering the chapter, death threats are probably also a compliment, lol. Please, have faith that I will not disappoint you by the end of this fic. I feel like I rushed through things a bit, but I also didn't want to drag things out. I'm not _that_ mean!

 **To GuestXO:** I'm glad you liked the chapter and the way I've interpreted the characters! :)

 **To KwibKwib:** Funny you should mention Lila remembering certain things ;D

 **To Guest:** Thank you for reviewing! I'm glad you like the fic enough to share it with others. Hopefully, the ending is up to your standards!

 **Warnings** continued from last chapter; blood, dissociation, Adrien's terrible coping skills.

* * *

 **All Your Love Is Revenge**

 **Ch. 22: Even If the Future Becomes Invisible**

"No, no, no," Chat's hand clenched around Marinette's wound. "Marinette! Open your eyes, Marinette! Say something! Yell at me, tease me, anything! Just wake up!"

How much blood could a person lose? Reluctant to let go of her hand, but desperate to do something, he reached over to rip off a part of her skirt to stop the wound from bleeding more. The light blue material seemed to turn red almost instantly.

"Where the fuck is the ambulance?" Chat demanded. Distantly, he was aware that not all that much time had passed since Carapace made the call - a few seconds at most - but it was far too much time for a bullet wound.

"It's midday, there must be traffic!" Rena growled and he could recognize the same sort of desperate anguish that he felt in her voice.

Marinette's chest had stopped heaving once she closed her eyes. Was she even still breathing? Feeling panic claw at his chest, Chat leaned forward and placed his head on her chest, his leather cat ears twitching as he strained to hear. There! A heartbeat, weak and fluttering, so different from her usual strong and sometimes almost frantic heartbeat, but there.

She was still alive, but for how long? His glove still felt slick against her wound, he could still feel blood slipping through his fingers. It felt like her heart was literally getting further and further away. And Ladybug -

The red kwami hummed nervously around Marinette's head, her overly large, blue eyes looking up at him almost pleadingly, as if he could fix it. _Ladybug_ was the one that fixed damage, not Chat Noir. But she couldn't fix it this time because Ladybug -

Ladybug was dying right in front of him. His first love and his mate were both dying at once because Marinette was Ladybug and -

He wasn't sure how he felt about it. A part of him thought he should be angry, but at the moment all he could feel was sheer panic because the ambulance still wasn't there and _M_ _other left and never came back and you can't leave me too! You promised! You promised you'd never leave me!_

Straightening up, Chat slipped his arms beneath her knees and shoulders and stood as quickly as he could on unsteady legs.

"What are you doing?" B shrieked. "You're not supposed to move her!"

"Hospital," he managed to growl before running towards the door marked exit. He didn't even know if the others were following him or had stayed behind to wait for the police or ambulance or whoever would show up. The mercenaries would have to be arrested, wouldn't they? Where had they gone?

Chat's teeth clacked together angrily. _Who cares?_ If they had run away, he would hunt them down. He was going to hunt down the idiot that originally uploaded the video and knock out the rest of his teeth. He was going to. . .

He was going to save Marinette first. Nothing else mattered at the moment. He couldn't hear her heartbeat over the sound of the wind as he jumped across the rooftops, but he pretended he could. As long as he could hear it, then everything was fine.

It seemed as if time stopped when he crossed through the doors of the emergency room, even the background chatter dropped off immediately. He wondered what he looked like. Chat Noir, heaving for breath, panic clear in his eyes, his unconscious lover in his arms covered in blood. Hospital staff should be used to the bizarre, shouldn't they?

"Help, please," he wanted to sound forceful, but his voice was unusually weak and quiet.

It seemed to be enough. The nearest woman wearing hospital scrubs ran towards them, barking orders that he didn't quite catch as the room descended into a flurry of motion. Somebody came by with a stretcher and then Marinette was being pulled from his arms. _No_ , he hissed at the faceless enemy, tightening his arms around her.

"Sir, please, let us do our job," the first woman said in a soothing voice.

The logical part of his brain understood that she was right, that he needed to let go if he wanted her to survive, but he couldn't. He didn't until Rena Rouge ran through the sliding doors and, taking in the scene, punched him in the shoulder yelling, "Stop being an idiot!"

Letting her go was like losing his center of gravity. His arms were still held uselessly out in front of him, and his legs were weak enough he thought he might collapse on the ground.

Rena placed a gentle hand on the shoulder she had just punched, "Let's go outside." He didn't actually want to, but he wasn't _doing_ anything and let her lead him out.

"Carapace is handling the akuma, and B is handling the police," she explained as if he cared about any of it. "I, uh, do you want to take care of this one?"

She held out her hands to him and he blinked at the kwami cupped in her palms. Chat _really_ didn't want to have to deal with it.

The fox girl coughed awkwardly, "So, Marinette is Ladybug? That sure is. . . something."

 _Something._ Yeah, it sure was. He still didn't feel any particular way about it, it was just strange. His princess was the one that had spent four and half years rejecting his every advance. His Lady was the one that invited him into her home for three years. His princess was the fearless protector of Paris. His Lady was the self-conscious student that needed to be reminded she wasn't useless once a semester. His princess was his first love. His Lady was his mate.

It sure was something.

"She was going to tell you," the kwami spoke quietly. "She was going to tell you really soon."

Oh, was that the surprise? _I think you'll like it_ , she had said. In any other circumstances. . . yes, he would have. She had already explained that she hadn't realized what she felt for him until recently, and it's not like he had any room to judge her for being unsure of her feelings. It certainly explained why Ladybug had suddenly decided she loved him when he had started pouring all his affection on Marinette.

"Will you say something?" Rena demanded, hands noticeably shaking.

Chat opened his mouth but the kwami spoke first, "He's obviously in shock, please go easy on him." Of course, Marinette got the well-spoken, understanding kwami. "I'm Tikki, by the way," she floated up and tapped his nose. "It's nice to formally meet you, Chat Noir."

His lips twitched into a smile for half a second at the obvious distraction, "It's nice to meet you, too."

His miraculous sounded off its five minute warning. "You should go," Rena recommended. "I'll stay and see if there's any news. It might be a while."

Chat whined at the reminder that Marinette was in surgery because of his stupidity and Tikki cuddled into his cheek. "Have faith! She'll be fine, but she's going to need you to be strong."

Right; still not the time for a pity party. He nodded at Rena, "I'll be back as soon as I can."

Running a few blocks away, he slipped into an empty alleyway and dropped his transformation. Plagg was unusually quiet, not even complaining about hunger. Adrien pulled a piece of camembert out of his pocket anyway and the cat kwami nibbled - actually _nibbled_ \- at the cheese instead of swallowing it whole like usual.

"Sorry, kid," the black kwami sighed as Adrien slid down to sit against the wall.

"It'll be fine," Tikki insisted and Plagg didn't so much as react to her presence. Of _course_ he knew Marinette was Ladybug. Of course he didn't bother to tell his chosen. Adrien sighed and stared at the wall across from him.

"Kid," Plagg wrapped himself around Adrien's wrist, his electric green eyes staring up at his chosen's. "I know how you feel, but you can't fall apart right now. You haven't lost her, she's still there, and she'll be waiting for you."

Plagg _did_ know how he felt. He knew about his mother, he had seen him fall apart when Marinette had broken off their arrangement. The kwami knew better than anyone that the only thing he wanted to do was crawl into bed and never come out. If he never came out, then Marinette wouldn't be gone. She'd be there, waiting, for as long as he stayed in bed. _Mother left and never came back and Father lost his heart and you can't, you can't, you can't._

Adrien inhaled a rough breath, knowing that both kwamis were right, and scrubbed roughly at the feeling of drying blood on his cheek. He needed to have faith that everything would be fine. He needed to go back and keep a vigil for his girlfriend. But first, there was something else he needed to do. Something that he was dreading even more than going back to the hospital.

"I need to tell her parents," he spoke dazedly. He was aware he had crashed into a public hospital, and that after the initial shock wore off, the patients in the waiting room must have brought out their phones to record, or even livestream, what was happening. He wondered how long it would take for it to reach the news channels. Tom and Sabine didn't deserve to find out their daughter was in the hospital by seeing her lifeless body on a screen.

"Yes, that would be best," Tikki agreed, despite the fact that it would mean they wouldn't want him anywhere near Marinette ever again. Even if he tried dating her as Adrien, they were smart enough to figure out he was Chat. They knew their daughter well enough to know she wouldn't be so fickle as to declare her love for Chat one week and then date Adrien the next.

 _One burning bridge at a time_ , he stretched his arm out. "Plagg, claws out."

He was glad that his miraculous armor wasn't stained by Marinette's blood anymore. Hopping over to the Dupain-Cheng patisserie, he decided to walk in through the front door. He didn't deserve the familiarity of letting himself into their apartment anymore.

"Chat," Sabine's eyes were red-rimmed, but she was dutifully standing behind the counter, ready to attend to any customers. _She's strong_ , he thought, certainly stronger than him. He flinched when she walked towards him, Tom stepping into the room following her exclamation. "Did you find her?"

"I -" he bowed his head, unable to look a mother in the eye while telling her that he'd gotten her daughter shot. "I was - she's in the hospital. I was too late. I'm sorry! I'm so sorry!"

Silence. Why was there so much silence? All he could hear were his own choked back sobs. Why didn't they yell and throw him out? Curse him for getting involved with their daughter? Why didn't they -

"Oh, dear," Sabine threw her arms around him, pulling his head down to her shoulder. He was surprised that she was actually a bit shorter than Marinette. "It's okay, let it out."

 _Why?_ He couldn't help it. He wrapped his arms around her and cried like a child, cried like he hadn't been allowed to since his mother disappeared and his father told him he had to grow up. Sabine rubbed his back and hummed soothingly until his sobs calmed down into whimpers.

"Why - why aren't you angry with me?" He pulled back from her.

"I'm a mother," she said simply. "I'll be angry later. Right now, you take us to Marinette. Tom, go get the van."

* * *

It was weird to travel huddled in the back of the patisserie delivery van, but at least he didn't have to think of anything even as simple as walking. Chat was happy to numb his brain and mindlessly follow the married couple through the halls of the hospital towards the waiting room.

That was why he didn't notice Carapace reaching towards him until he had a strong grip on his arm, "You can't be here."

Chat jolted and pulled his arm back. "I know you've never approved of my relationship with Marinette, but -"

"This isn't about that," Carapace interrupted with a frown. "Those men that you attacked, they're in surgery right now, too. It's bad, really bad. One of them has a fractured skull. If anything happens to them you can be charged for murder, or aggravated assault, or something!"

"What men?" the blond blinked confusedly.

"What men? The ones that took Mari!" The turtle miraculous holder shook his head sharply. "You know what? It doesn't matter. B's been trying to come to an accord with the police since the cannery, but right now you're a wanted man. You need to leave and not be Chat Noir."

"No," he replied instantly.

"Chat," Carapace warned.

"If I'm not Chat Noir, I can't see Marinette." That was the only thing that mattered. He needed to be there when she woke up.

"You can't see Marinette if you're in jail either!" Carapace closed his eyes and took a deep breath. "We're not going to cut you out, we'll keep you updated. We're trying to not lose you, too." Chat had to bite his tongue to keep from snapping because, _Marinette was not lost, he would_ not _lose her._ "We get past this when she gets better and uses the Miraculous Ladybug magic to fix all the damage the akuma caused."

How long would that take? Assuming everything would go well with the surgery - _it will!_ \- it would still be days, if not weeks for her to be able to get out of bed, let alone transform to purify the akuma. How long could someone with a fractured skull last?

"Babe!" Rena cried anxiously and suddenly Carapace was pushing him back in the direction he just walked. Chat could see men in blue uniforms over his friend's shoulder.

"Run!"

Chat ran, if for nothing else, then for the red kwami currently sitting on his shoulder, tucked into his neck. He didn't run far; only to the roof of the nearest, tallest building, and let his transformation drop at once. Adrien dropped onto his back, and Plagg settled on his chest.

It would be easy enough to get away with murder by simply staying Adrien Agreste. Some cynical part of him believed _Adrien_ could murder somebody and get away with it by simply using his fortune. He didn't remember attacking the mercenaries, not really. He had the vague sense memory of his baton vibrating in his hands as it impacted something with as much force as he could muster in his dazed state. That. . . was probably enough to kill a man.

A part of him didn't even mind the fact that he almost killed somebody. There had been so much blood, too much blood. How was somebody as small as Marinette supposed to survive losing so much blood?

"Whatever you're thinking," Plagg interrupted. "There wasn't that much blood."

Adrien twitched, wondering at what point the bad luck kwami had become a mind reader. "You don't know what I'm thinking."

"Well, you're wrong," the kwami sassed.

"Trauma has a way of distorting memories," Tikki gently inputted. "It really _was_ quick. You must have gotten her to the hospital in less than five minutes after she fell unconscious! I'm certain Marinette will be fine and it will be because of your actions!"

Adrien felt tears prick his eyes. Of course she got the kwami that knew exactly what to say to make somebody feel better! "They can't keep me from her," his voice cracked as he spoke.

"Of course not," Tikki cooed at the same time Plagg gagged, "Blegh!"

* * *

It wasn't exactly easy. He couldn't be kept in the loop if he wasn't Chat Noir, and he couldn't transform out in public because the police were _actually_ looking to arrest him. Plagg grumbled about ingratitude, while Tikki hummed about consequences, and Adrien just tried to not lose his mind. Eventually, they decided that the best course of action was to hide out in his room, periodically transforming and asking for details from the others.

It took three hours of surgery for Marinette to be declared _stable._ "They say she is very lucky," Rena explained somberly. "The bullet didn't rupture any organs and they were able to get it out successfully and there are no signs of septic shock. The blood loss was the worst part and they're keeping her under observation to make sure a bacterial peritonitis - I think - doesn't occur. Nobody's been able to see her yet, I think she still hasn't regained consciousness."

"Why not?" Chat demanded into the baton.

The fox girl made an unsure sound, "Anesthesia? Trauma? I don't speak doctor and neither do the Dupain-Chengs. All we can do is wait and trust the doctors aren't just talking circles around us."

Chat sighed, tired to the bone, and acutely aware that Rena's voice implied that she cared about Marinette as more than just the civilian that occasionally helped them, and more than just her leader Ladybug. She said she went to school with them, and that she didn't care about her identity if it meant saving Marinette. He was sure that were it not for the miraculous shielding her from his inquisitive thoughts, he would easily figure out her identity.

Not that it mattered at the moment, "You'll let me know when she wakes up, right?"

"Yeah," she answered instantly even though her tone was uncertain. She was probably worried he would march right into Marinette's room the moment she was awake, warrant or no warrant. She was right to worry.

Adrien had no choice but to go to school the next day, even looking as horrible as he felt. Tikki had phased through the walls at some point to sneak some sleeping pills to him, since there was no chance of him resting without them. All told, he'd had about three hours of fitful dreams, most of them centering around Marinette, but in some he saw his mother, beautiful and sad and _leaving._

Upon waking and transforming quickly, he found a message from Rena stating that Marinette had woken up long enough to react negatively and thrash around so much she reopened her stitches. She was now being kept sedated until the doctors were sure she hadn't caused herself to pick up an infection.

School was a haze, empty and lonely. Neither Nino or Alya were there, and that was to be expected. Alya was Marinette's best friend, and Nino had known her forever and had only gotten closer to her when he began dating her best friend. But Adrien was just her friend, closer than most of the others, but not so close as to be waiting at her bedside for her to wake. Even though, thanks to Nino's not so subtle sympathies, everybody knew he had feelings for her, it would be strange for him to act so familiarly with her. Especially not with Alya there, miraculous magic or no, the blogger would probably suspect the truth.

The rest of the class was surprisingly subdued about the news. Instead of gossiping and dissecting it like they did every time something remotely interesting happened to somebody in their class, they were quiet and somber. Mournful. The only hiccup was Kim suddenly blurting vitriol towards the man that uploaded the video and vowing to hunt him down. An idea that Max was quick to dissuade him from.

Nobody so much as hinted at hard feelings towards Chat. He kind of wished they would.

At lunch time he walked out of the classroom, intent on going home and not coming back, when he caught a flash of long, brown hair. He froze mid-step, the world narrowing until all he could see was Lila Rossi. She wore a long checkered overcoat over her blue mini-dress, her hair and make up impeccably done. She didn't look like somebody that had almost killed the woman she professed to love. He grit his teeth until he was sure they would crack.

"Adrien," Tikki warned from where she was squished beside Plagg in his breast pocket. The cat kwami only grumbled unhappily and obeyed without complaint when Adrien snuck into the nearest empty classroom and asked to be transformed.

Stalking quietly after the Italian girl, he waited until she walked by a storage closet and rushed at her, pushing her into the cramped room and closing the door after him. Lila choked on a scream when he flicked the light on and she saw who it was, but she made no move to run or fight or yell for help.

"Why are you here?" Chat growled out, tail flicking angrily against a nearby broom with a crack.

Lila flinched at the sound but looked him in the eye," I go to school here."

"No! I mean, why aren't you in jail?"

"Akuma victims can't be held responsible for their actions," she responded easily, referring to the hastily drawn up law absolving former akumas from their crimes.

Chat had always believed that was a good thing. He knew a lot of the akumas, was friends with many, and knew that most of them would never think of doing the things they did under Hawk Moth's influence. But this was different, "Akuma victims don't usually work with mercenaries."

"I don't remem-"

"Akuma victims don't usually shoot people."

"I didn't -"

"Akuma victims don't leave people bleeding in a hospital, hanging on by a thread!"

"Well, why didn't you fix it? I gave you the akuma! You were supposed to fix it!" The brunette was heaving for breath by the time she finished her outburst, tears pricking her eyes. She froze at the same time Chat did, realizing what she had just revealed.

"You remember," the hero breathed.

"No, I - I don't know. There's bits and pieces," she stuttered, eyes flicking to the ground. "I sort of remember being Volpina before. I think, maybe, that's why. . ."

"You remember," he repeated, suddenly recalling the way the glowing butterfly mask over her face had sparked as she offered him her flute. She had resisted. He knew, from years of experience, that occasionally akumas would turn on Hawk Moth, because they had opposing goals or they were simply _that_ impetuous, and Hawk Moth would cause them excruciating pain through his powers. It was usually enough to turn them back to his side, but she had resisted. "What else do you remember?"

"Marinette," she muttered morosely.

Chat huffed angrily, finding her sadness somewhat unjustified. It was as much her fault for deciding what was best for Marinette as it was Chat's for being careless about what he did while transformed.

"Do you remember Hawk Moth?"

"His voice," Lila answered automatically. "It's cold and harsh and it was everywhere. I think. . . I think I could sort of see what he saw in my head. It was dark, there were white butterflies everywhere, but that's all I remember."

Dark, that figured. It was more than they had ever gotten from an akuma victim, but it was still nothing. Nothing that could lead them to Hawk Moth, nothing that would make him pay for what he did. Nothing. . . _yet._

"Do you think," he began slowly, a crazy idea forming in his mind. "Do you think you could remember more if you were akumatized?"

* * *

Chat paced impatiently on the high roof across from the hospital. He had gotten a few more messages from Rena Rouge, all stating that the situation remained unchanged. At the very least, Marinette wasn't getting worse. Tikki sat on his shoulder, muttering unhappily about desperate ideas and how revenge solved nothing. Chat, on the other hand, was impressed that he had managed to wait until sunset to send his message to the other miraculous holders.

It took about fifteen minutes for the other three to land on the roof. Rena looked a mess, Carapace's face was drawn and tired, and B looked strangely subdued. All Chat could notice was the glass jar in the blonde heroine's hand, the tainted butterfly fluttering angrily inside.

"Why did you bring _that_ thing?" Rena demanded, pointing at the jar. "You were supposed to keep it safe!"

B spluttered angrily before pointing at Chat, "He said it was important!"

Carapace stared the only other male on the team down, "Well?"

"I have an idea," he explained, doing his best to sound confident. "You're not going to like it." Chat whistled towards the door leading to the building and the girl that had been sitting there huddled for as long as he had been pacing walked towards the group of heroes.

"Why did _you_ bring _that_ thing?" Rena hissed angrily, looking like she might punch the former akuma again. Lila didn't so much as react to the insult.

"She's the idea," Chat continued. "While she was Volpina, she managed to resist Hawk Moth's control long enough to give me her akumatized item. She can remember some things about her time as an akuma, and she mentioned that she could see what Hawk Moth saw, where he's hiding. If we akumatized her, maybe -"

"Absolutely not," Carapace interrupted.

"Maybe she could resist long enough to tell us where he is," Chat finished stubbornly.

"It's too dangerous," the turtle boy insisted, crossing his arms resolutely. "And it won't help Marinette."

Of course it wouldn't. He _knew_ it wouldn't. But he needed to do _something_ or he would explode! And if that something was hunting down Hawk Moth and breaking him in half so that he could never akumatize anybody ever again, then nobody was going to stop him. Even if he had to fight them to break that jar.

"Hawk Moth has to pay," he persisted, voice ragged. Chat didn't like the pity in his teammates' eyes. He didn't like the gentle quiet that followed his declaration. He didn't like the way Tikki hummed nervously as she cuddled into his neck.

"I want to," Lila spoke quietly but firmly. "If it helps, even a little, to make things right, then I want to."

Rena placed her arms on her hips and cocked them to the side, "Your flute's still broken."

"It wouldn't really matter, would it?" B offered, looking down at the akuma in her arms. "It would attach to anything, as long as she was still feeling negative enough."

"I am," Lila declared. "Believe me, I am."

Carapace whipped his head around, realizing that he was being overruled, and sighed. "Are we _really_ doing this?"

Chat felt his lips twitch upwards for half a second, incredibly glad he had people he could rely on even now. Ladybug was going to kill them all, but, "Yes, we are."

There was a moment of uncertainty, before B huffed, "Oh let's just get this over with." Raising the jar over her head, she dropped it against the roof so that it shattered.

"You could have just opened it," Carapace shrieked. "Where am I going to find another enchanted jar?"

The blonde heroine snickered meanly but Chat only had eyes for the akuma as it floated up from the shards towards the flutist. It settled on the sleeve of her overcoat, purple bubbles overtaking her body until the masked villainess, now with a stylish coat, stood in her place. She blinked confusedly, "Nothing happened, I don't -"

She was cut off as Hawk Moth's mark appeared glowing over her face, her eyes widening in fear at a voice nobody else can hear. "I'm not doing anything," she said slowly before quickly shutting her eyes. "No, that wasn't - I'm not!" She cut off suddenly before shouting, "There's a window! There's a large window like an observatory! I can see the Eiffel Tower, it's not that far! I can see -"

Volpina fell to her knees as purple electricity danced across her body and mask. She convulsed suddenly and Chat was almost sure she had been forced to bite her tongue by the mysterious puppeteer. His stomach twisted as he heard her scream, because what was he _thinking_ , why did he think this was a good idea? She was being hurt! She was just a girl who'd had her emotions manipulated by an evil man and she felt so bad about it that she was willing to go through this to make it right.

Why hadn't he stopped to consider what might happen to her if they did this?

"Take the akuma out already," B ran over to do just that, pulling on Volpina's sleeve until they heard a rip.

Lila fell forwards onto her hands as she was released from the akuma's thrall, the purple butterfly floating up to the night sky. Chat stared mournfully at its fluttering wings, hopelessness enveloping him as the only goal he'd managed to find faded into nothing. And then a red blur flew past his head as Tikki tackled the akuma, sharp, tiny teeth clamping onto one of its wings. It still managed to fly, but seemed to struggle, burdened by the new, unexpected weight.

"Follow it!" Tikki commanded suddenly through gritted teeth. "Its instinct is to return to its master. Follow it if you want to find Hawk Moth!"

If they wanted all this to have meant something. Chat leaned down to place a hand on Lila's back, "I'm sorry." She shook her head stubbornly but he insisted, "You're going to have to get home alone. Sorry."

The miraculous holders took off after the akuma, barely able to keep an eye on it in the inky darkness of the sky that matched its wings, even Tikki's scarlet body was barely visible. Chat was sure he was the only one that could really see it, and even he had some trouble seeing it at the altitude it was. Eventually, though, it started to lower, and he was surprised at how quick the journey was. They were still in the 21st Arrondissement. They were still in the neighborhood that he had grown up in. They were _really_ close to where he lived, actually.

Chat felt himself freeze when Tikki finally released the akuma and it flew towards a familiar mansion.

"That's Adrien's house," he was surprised to hear B say. "Why is it going to Adrien's house?"

There was a moment of silence as the others seemed to reach some sort of conclusion, and then Carapace spoke, "It's not Adrien! He's too kind to hurt _anybody_ , especially not Marinette, he loves her!" He turned wide eyes on Chat and then seemed to hurry to reassure him, "Not in a crazy, jealous I'll hurt you because you chose a superhero over me kind of way. A genuine way!"

"Of course it's not Adrien," Rena agreed with a determined nod.

Chat couldn't speak, too many thoughts running through his mind. One being the fact that he seemed to know the miraculous holders without the masks, and another being _how_ Carapace knew about his feelings so well. But the most important was, _why_ was an akuma fluttering into his childhood home, the place that he slept, the place that he had been standing in only a few hours ago?

"I know it's not Adrien," he forced himself to say. There were really only four people that it could be. His father hired cooks and servants that worked from five in the morning to eight in the night, making food and cleaning around the house, but none of them were live in staff. That left four people that would be there that late. It wasn't Adrien, for obvious reasons. It wasn't the Gorilla or his father because they had both been akumatized. Nathalie's voice could sometimes be described as cold, but he didn't think it could be confused for a man's, unless the miraculous magic was working _really_ well to conceal her identity.

So, who could it be if all four suspects were disqualified?

"You have to go in," Tikki touched his cheek gently. "You need to know the truth."

A part of him thought she sounded like she already knew what he would find, and he wondered if Plagg knew they had been sleeping under the same roof Hawk Moth worked in all this time. He wondered if the kwami kept the identity of his mortal enemy a secret the same way he had kept Ladybug's because of some weird cosmic rule. Or maybe because he didn't think Adrien would be able to handle it.

Chat cleared his throat, "Right, let's go in."

* * *

He wasn't sure what he expected, but seeing the akuma phase through a wall in his father's study wasn't it. Chat was inordinately quiet as the four of them stood in the spacious room. B hummed nervously, balancing on her heels, and Carapace chewed nervously on the inside of his cheek.

It was Rena that broke the sullen silence, "Maybe he has an underground lair?"

"Lila said she could see the Eiffel Tower," Chat reminded her. It had to be at least somewhat above ground. It had to be part of the mansion, not just below it. Hawk Moth wasn't coincidentally hiding beneath their feet like an ironic comic book villain, he had been in his home, and there were less than a handful of people that he could be, but. . . but it couldn't be any of them. It couldn't be his father, no matter whose office they were standing in.

 _Nathalie?_ He wondered almost hopefully, despite knowing that it was unfair to the beleaguered assistant. Nathalie had been kind to him, even when his father had not, but it was his _father._ He couldn't be Hawk Moth because if he was, then that would mean his father was the reason Marinette was in the hospital. He was the reason she had resisted sharing identities for so long. He was the person Chat had been willing to destroy only moments ago.

The ground opened up before them and the man himself rose up on a platform nonchalantly, arms crossed behind his back.

Chat felt his heart stutter and wondered how much more he could take. Everything was the same! The same build, the same eyes, the same _frown_ , even the same unimpressed look he was giving the miraculous warriors before him was the same. Adrien had seen it a thousand times. At this point, he was sure it wasn't the glamour keeping him from realizing who was standing before him but rather his rather fragile grip on reality.

"Oh," the masked man hummed distractedly. "Was this the plan? You found me and, now what? You arrest me? Are you going to attack me?"

To be honest, they had never really thought that far ahead. The plan was always to take his miraculous from him, but the how had never really come up. Fighting to the death wasn't really something that came up in casual conversation, and the police wouldn't be able to hold him.

"You," Chat managed to speak. He was aware that the others had taken up fighting positions, but his arms hung limply at his side. "You tried to kill my girlfriend." _Do you understand that?_ He grit his teeth to keep from blurting out his identity. There was a chance, wasn't there, that Hawk Moth wasn't Gabriel Agreste. He'd been akumatized, after all.

 _No_. . . there really wasn't.

"You tried to kill the only person that loves me, all of me, unconditionally," his claws dug into the palm of his gloves, the magic keeping them from piercing his skin, as tears filled his eyes. "You never did," he confessed quietly and suddenly all the attention in the room was on him. "You only loved me as long as I did exactly what you wanted. You always were controlling, weren't you?"

He could see the foggy recognition in the cold blue eyes before him, the indication that he _almost_ understood was Chat was telling him, but magic - or denial - kept him from reaching the logical conclusion.

"Plagg," Tikki fluttered nervously beside him but didn't stop him from doing something incredibly stupid. "Claws in."

A blinding green light filled the room and then Adrien Agreste stood before his mortal enemy.

"No," Hawk Moth's calm veneer finally cracked. He took a step back as if the sight physically hurt him. "You can't be! Not my son, not my -"

"What?" B shrieked, "You're Gabriel Agreste?"

"Do you care now?" Adrien demanded. "Do you care about what you've done? You tried to kill my girlfriend! You tried to kill the person I love most in the world! Do you care about what you've done to her? To me?"

There was another tense silence, where Hawk Moth's jaw hung open, his eyes wide and searching, before they closed and. . . no, Adrien realized, he didn't care. He didn't care about Marinette's life. He didn't care about Adrien's feelings. He only cared about getting what he wanted, whatever that was.

"It's for your mother, Adrien," he spoke quickly, as if reading his mind. "I'm going to get her back."

Four years ago, he would have hesitated at those words. His mother had been the center of his world for so long, and he missed her like crazy every day. But now he had fought too many enemies, had seen too many innocent people suffer, had saved too many people to think that anything could be worth it. Not even his mother.

"No, you won't," he swore before turning on his heel and marching from the room. He heard his father call out for him, but he didn't turn to look. Not even when he heard a commotion that was surely the others stopping his father from chasing after him. He simply walked out of the mansion and into the street, and kept walking until he reached a bench, his legs giving out from under him.

He sat with his head in his hands and two kwamis on his shoulders, until he heard somebody clear their throat. The three still-transformed heroes stood awkwardly before him, more unsure than he had ever seen them.

"So," Rena began. "You're Chat Noir. And your dad's Hawk Moth. And your girlfriend's Ladybug."

"Pretty much," he agreed.

"How are you holding up?" Carapace asked carefully.

Adrien laughed humorously, "I lost my girlfriend, my father, my secret identity, and my home in less than thirty-two and a half hours. How do you think?"

"You haven't lost Marinette," Carapace placed his hands on Adrien's shoulders. "And you still have us, too."

The green-clad hero looked back at their other two teammates with a small smile. Rena shrugged with a sigh and B blew a raspberry, but at the same time they dropped their transformations. And for the second time that night, Adrien felt his brain shut down.

"Wait," he pointed at his sheepishly smiling classmates. At his best friend, his oldest friend, and his girlfriend's best friend. People he saw practically every day. He wasn't sure where to begin. " _Chloé?_ "

The blonde gave an affronted gasp, "Why am _I_ the most shocking one?"

Adrien rubbed the back of his neck nervously, pretty sure that "you're not nice enough to be Queen B" was not going to go down well with the surly blonde.

"I should be the shocked one," she continued scathingly, nose up in the air in a familiar pose. "Marinette is the amazing Ladybug, and Adrien's a freaking idiot that's addicted to cat puns, and apparently I've been hanging out with the dorks in love all these years! This is an outrage!"

Adrien couldn't help but find the humor in all the ridiculousness. Laughter bubbled up to his lips until he couldn't hold them back and his entire frame shook with it. He didn't stop laughing for a long time, not even when the tears started streaming down his face.

* * *

 **A/N:** No more secret identities! I'm not sure if the kwamis _actually_ know who Hawk Moth is, or if they can sense each other or whatnot since Plagg seemed shocked to see Marinette in _Dark Owl_ , so I left it purposefully vague. **In** _ **Robustus**_ **, the akuma seemed to know where Hawk Moth was** , maybe it was just because he was robot, but I like to think the communication/vision-sharing works both ways, because a doorway goes both ways, doesn't it?

 **The Hawk Moth reveal** is probably pretty tame compared to most fics, but I don't think either of them would _actually_ be willing to fight each other. Neither Agreste would give up in their respective goals, but they'd probably be shell-shocked about it. I may not like Gabriel, but I don't think even _he_ could be willing to attack his son at the drop of a hat to get his wife back.

 **I actually researched bullet wounds for this** , even though I purposely made Alya a little confused, since - as stated above - she's not a doctor and most of the time, people nod at whatever a doctor's saying without really hearing anything. Please give me validation for my efforts!

 **Does Adrien know what happened to his mother?** Do WE know what happened to his mother? It's so vague; they never say if she's dead or missing or just ran away! I'm behind in the season because I wanted to binge watch the rest of it, so if they've revealed what happened to her, feel free to spoil it for me!

This chapter's title is translated from **Lovers by 7!(Seven Oops)** , which translates into "You cried just now/ Like a sobbing child/ Even if the future becomes invisible, I will protect you." Which I feel fits this chapter pretty well.

As always, let me know what you liked, didn't like, and what could use improvement!

~ Destiny's Sweet Melody!


	23. We're Not Broken, Just Bent

**A/N:** Only one chapter left after this one, let's go!

 **To GuestXO:** Actually supportive friendships is one of my favorite things about the show!

 **To TinySneakyBagel:** Thank you for reviewing! I'm glad you liked the fic so far. Hopefully that last F Bomb was a good thing lol.

* * *

 **All Your Love Is Revenge**

 **Ch. 23: We're Not broken, Just Bent**

Marinette had never been one for lucid dreaming, but there was a gauzy substance to her visions that let her know she was currently unconscious. Most of it was memories, occasionally interrupted by nonsense dreams, one of which included Tikki who was yellow for some reason and kept asking Marinette if she had seen a kitty cat. Marinette preferred the memories.

There was the time her parents had first spoken to Chat. She honestly couldn't remember much of what was said, she had been too focused on holding his hand and leaning against his shoulder, a dopey smile on her face. Chat had seemed terrified, sitting ramrod straight and answering their every question with short, stammering sentences, but Marinette had only sighed and tried to memorize his warmth. Her parents understood how she felt, and, despite all their bluster, wouldn't have even considered forbidding her from seeing him.

She kept going back to their first anniversary, to the first time he had taken her breath away. If she was being honest, it was probably the first time she wished she was his girlfriend, rather than just the friend he sometimes slept with.

Sometimes, she would see herself in Dreamer's trap, her forehead against Chat's shoulder and Hugo in her arms. Except, with no Queen B to save her, the vision continued unimpeded, and her parents would enter to gush over their first grandchild. Alya and Nino would walk in hand in hand to congratulate her, and Chat would kiss her and tell her he loved her. She knew it wasn't the _best_ possible future, but it _was_ possible, and she felt consumed by happiness.

But then, inevitably, reality would get in the way and she would remember why she was stuck cycling through her memories. She would remember Volpina and the cannery, the terror she felt when she saw the countless men keeping guard and how she wouldn't be able to find a moment or hidden place to transform unnoticed. She tried to escape anyway. The first time, Tikki had snuck out of her purse to help her undo the knots on the ropes around her wrists and ankles, but she hadn't managed to take two steps before a man had grabbed her around the waist and dragged her back to be bound again.

The second time, she'd had to be more patient. Two men were left as guards at all times, so Tikki was forced to hide. Marinette had almost been willing to wait until she was rescued, but then Volpina had arrived with a bruised chin complaining about Chat not falling for the illusion of Marinette rejecting him and she had been filled with fury. Chat was physically strong, but emotionally. . . not so much. Even knowing it was an illusion, being rejected must have hit him hard, especially so soon after she had told him she loved him for the first time.

She had almost rubbed her wrists raw slipping out of her bonds, and she hadn't even cared if the guards saw her reaching over to untie her ankles. By the time they noticed, she was free and she kicked one in the knees so hard he fell over and kneed the other in the groin before running for her purse. She made it all the way to the exit that time, and she may have even been able to escape if she hadn't needed to grab her purse.

The large man she had pegged as the leader had mocked her and women everywhere for "needing her purse so badly she let herself get trapped" and she had no choice but to endure his taunts. If it weren't for Tikki, she wouldn't have cared for the bag, but there was no point in regretting it at that point.

At least they didn't tie her up again. Instead, they forced her into a corner and added another guard, one with a gun in his hand, and a gag around her mouth. She wasn't sure how long they had all stood there, her purse just out of reach, taunting her, when the men decided they were bored and began reaching for her. Her gut instinct had been to recoil, but there was nowhere to go, and she heard herself whimper pitifully.

Then Chat was there and the army she had been so scared of was just an illusion and she would have been angry at herself except she was so happy to see him. Until she felt the gun press into her side and heard the man ask who Chat loved more and she saw his pained, sad eyes and realized the answer was _her._ She would have been thrilled under any other circumstances, but right now, with Chat reaching to pull off his miraculous, she panicked.

She had tried yelling at him through the gag but, if he even understood, he only smiled sadly at her and prepared to hand over his ring. The ring around her own finger felt suddenly heavy as the world narrowed down to a single moment. She had known what it meant when the video came out and she decided to be in a relationship with him anyway. She had known what it meant to be Chat Noir's girlfriend to the world. She had let her guard down, and it was her fault, not his, and he shouldn't be the one to pay the price for it. She shouldn't have accepted the ring if she wasn't willing to sacrifice everything to keep him safe.

 _Look at me,_ she tried to call his attention, but he was focused on his ring, on Plagg, and everything he was giving up for her. Marinette really didn't want her last thoughts to be _My apologies to Alfred Noyes,_ but she could only think of his stupid and borderline misogynistic poem as she slammed her hand against the gun and heard the startled man fire.

Everything after that was a blur, fragments of pain and cries. And. . . Tikki. Tikki was there, Chat had seen her, he knew she had lied. And she couldn't even apologize. The worst part of everything was that she had left him alone again. She hadn't meant to, didn't want to, she knew Ladybug surviving was just as important as Chat Noir surviving, but if Chat gave up his miraculous, then neither of them were getting out alive. Whatever Hawk Moth's intentions were, she had overheard the men laughing at Volpina's belief that she would walk out with Marinette, and she knew that the trigger would be pulled regardless.

The very least she could do was spare Chat, even though she knew he would be angry about it. Marinette didn't want to break his heart. She wanted to wake up, more than anything.

* * *

Slowly, Marinette's eyelids lifted. She inhaled quickly, head a little dizzy, and blinked against the harsh fluorescent lighting overhead. Her arms rose, or tried to. Something tugged them back down before she could lift them more than a few centimeters. Panic set in when she realized she was bound by the hands and legs once again and she wondered if she was still being kept hostage. If it was all for nothing.

A soft snore interrupted her ruminations and she slowly moved her head towards the sound. She seemed to be on a hospital bed, arms over the starchy white sheets covering her torso and bound to the rails by leather cuffs. There was someone sleeping with their head by her hand, their face was turned in the other direction but she smiled at the familiar messy hair. Bit by bit, she moved her arm so that she could run her fingers through the tips of his hair.

It wasn't until he jolted awake that she realized he didn't have cat ears. Marinette blinked in surprise, "Oh, Adrien."

The blond seemed to freeze at her voice, eyes filled to the brim with countless emotions, and then smiled radiantly. "Marinette, you're awake!" He leaned forward to grasp her arms in the closest approximation of a hug she could receive given the situation, and then he kept leaning forward. For a moment, she thought he might kiss her and she squeaked in the back of her throat. He froze again before quickly pulling back, "I. . . we've been waiting for you in shifts - to wake up, I mean - and it was my turn. Lucky me." Taking awkward steps backwards, he offered her a timid smile. "I'll go get the others now."

"Wait, Adrien," she called before he could finish his retreat. "Thank you for being here."

"Of course, I -" he seemed to bite his tongue and flushed brightly. Marinette felt herself blush in return as she realized he was about to confess having feelings that would only serve to make things awkward between them. It seemed a little unfair, all things considered, that Marinette got to be with the person she loved while Adrien couldn't.

Adrien cleared his throat gracelessly, "I was happy to. I'll go get the others."

Marinette was left in the quiet room for four long, lonely minutes before her parents burst in, a nurse on their heels. There were tears in their eyes and she felt her eyes fill with tears in response. It had been a stupid, selfish thing she had done, but it was all she could think to do in the moment.

"I'm sorry," her voice broke in a sob as the tears began to spill.

Her maman shushed her as she stroked her fingers through her hair. Her papa grasped one of her hands, and looked to the nurse, "Could we take these straps off her?"

The dark haired woman nodded shortly, "It was a preemptive measure due to how violently she woke up the first time."

Marinette didn't remember waking up before, she wasn't sure how long she had been asleep. It felt like an instant, but she had dreamt a lot. . . hadn't she? Everything was starting to fade into the same fog most dreams ended up in.

When she asked how long she had been unconscious, her maman made a displeased sound, "Two days. It's Tuesday now."

" _Tuesday?_ " Her voice raised a few octaves and the nurse huffed.

"Please try to refrain from causing her stress."

Sabine rolled her eyes, "I doubt there's very little that causes more stress than waking up in the hospital."

The nurse frowned but didn't protest the comment.

"There now," her papa rubbed her arms when he finished releasing the straps on her limbs. "That's better, right?"

Marinette nodded in agreement, even though the longer she was awake, the more her body started to ache. She was sure that it would only get worse as time went on and whatever was flowing through her system faded away.

The nurse used the lull in conversation to give her the run down on her diagnosis, which she only half paid attention to. She trusted her parents to understand hospital speak better than she did, though they seemed to be more focused on her than the nurse as well. The woman didn't seem to care, doing her duty and then excusing herself, reminding them that the doctor should be by in a few hours.

"Maman, Papa," she looked towards her parents who were sitting on each side of her, gripping a hand tightly each. "Where's Chat?"

Her papa's hand tightened around hers for a moment, and she felt panic tighten her throat again.

"It's fine, he's fine," her maman calmly intoned, sensing her daughter's mood shift. "He's been hanging around the hospital and the other heroes have been keeping him informed."

Marinette tried to relax at her words, except, "Why isn't he here?"

Adrien's presence meant that it wasn't an "only family allowed" sort of deal, and she imagined that Alya and Nino were waiting outside for their turn to visit. Apparently, some of the other miraculous holders had been watching over her as well. So, why wasn't Chat here, waiting for her to wake up?

"Where is he?" she repeated and her parents shared a worried glance. "Not telling me is not going to stop me from panicking!"

Tom cleared his throat and began carefully, "There was a bit of an. . . issue. The men that took you, the ones that weren't akumatized, are in a delicate state and as long as it doesn't get fixed, he will be blamed for it."

Marinette lifted an eyebrow, "I don't understand."

"Chat," her papa explained with a wince. "Beat them half to death."

"Not that I blame him," her maman said with a sniffle, but Marinette couldn't hear her.

Chat had attacked non-akumatized men - again - because of her. They were in danger of dying and if they did, he could go to prison, because of her. There was no Miraculous Ladybug to fix it all because Ladybug was the idiot who shot herself. Everything was a mess, and it was all because of her!

"Oh no," her maman cupped her cheeks, swiping at tears with her thumbs. "Don't cry, Marinette! Everything will be alright, you'll see."

Marinette wished she had more strength in her body to sit up and embrace her maman. She wanted to hide in her parents' arms and wish away reality. She wanted to turn back time and do everything differently, to be more careful and not get taken hostage in the first place. But most of all, "I want Chat."

* * *

Marinette had learned long ago that she rarely ever got what she wanted. In fact, Chat Noir loving her back was one of a handful of wishes that had ever been granted to her. She probably shouldn't be too surprised that crying that she wanted Chat with her didn't mean she was going to get him. He was still a wanted man, and Alya had informed her that there was an officer located at each end of the hall her room was on, lying in wait for when he inevitably tried to visit.

He was, unfortunately, smart enough to not try. He was the only one. Aside from her parents, Alya, and Nino, who were there as much as possible, every single one of her classmates came by to visit her at least once. Even Chloé and Sabrina came by to do their good deed of the day by making sure she wasn't dead, as the blonde put it. Aside from the first day, she hadn't seen Adrien again, but she understood that he was a busy person, and it was probably an uncomfortable position to be in for him.

On Friday, she was visited by Rena Rouge, Carapace, and Queen B, who took turns apologizing for being too late to save her. Coincidentally, it was the same day the doctor declared her strong enough to start physical therapy and get out of bed. That also meant she was strong enough to handle bad news. She gulped when Rena asked her parents for a moment alone.

The atmosphere in the room became tense the instant the door clicked shut.

Marinette licked her lips, "Is Chat okay?"

Rena snorted, "Of course, that's what you choose to focus on! Not the fact that we know you're Ladybug."

"What?" Marinette's voice was little more than a strangled whisper, the blood fleeing her face.

"Babe," Carapace chided. "Not cool."

Rena's eyes widened, as if suddenly realizing that flippant disregard for her secret identity wasn't the best way to go about things. "Sorry! I thought you remembered we were there when Tikki slipped out of your bag. It wasn't hard to put things together after that."

The designer buried her face in her hands, "Is that why Chat isn't here? Does he hate me for being Ladybug?"

"Of course not!" Rena rushed forward to take her hands, kneeling so that she could look Marinette in the eyes. "He loves you!"

"Then why hasn't he come to see me?" Even if he'd rather avoid a skirmish with the police in the hall, there was a window _right there!_ Nobody would be able to stop him from seeing her if he really wanted to.

Rena opened her mouth to say something, but Carapace placed a hand on her shoulder and shook his head sharply. "Things are difficult right now," the green clad man explained. "It would be best if you focused on getting well enough to transform and use the Miraculous Ladybug."

"Right," Marinette sighed. "Where's Tikki?"

"With Chat," Rena smiled softly. "He's been taking good care of her, and she's been taking care of him."

"Mari," Carapace said, and she was surprised at the familiarity. "We'd like to reveal ourselves to you."

Rena shrugged at her shocked silence, "It's only fair."

"I don't!" B tapped her foot impatiently, her entire face cherry red. "It's embarrassing!"

Marinette smiled at the reminder that B didn't really like Marinette despite worshipping Ladybug. If there was anybody that was going to be disappointed about her identity, it was B. And Chloé, if she ever happened to find out. But not Chat. . . probably.

"You don't have to if you don't want to," she offered gently.

"Er, well the thing is," Rena let go of Marinette's hand to wave hers around. "We sort of already know each other's identities. You're kind of the only one that's out of the loop."

Wait. . . "You know who Chat is?"

B scoffed, "Of _course_ that's what you choose to focus on!"

* * *

On Sunday, a full week after she was brought into the hospital, the doctor cleared her to get out of bed for more than just physical therapy. In a wheelchair, but still. It was progress! Marinette had yet to see even a hint of Chat, and she tried very, very hard to not feel rejected. Her kidnappers were still in the ICU, the entirety of Paris holding their breath to see whether they'd improve or not. She understood that he couldn't just waltz around the city - even if the police didn't particularly want to catch him, they had to do their jobs, and even criminals deserved to have their potential murderers convicted - but when left to her own devices, Marinette did what she does best, which was _overthink._

Now she didn't even have Tikki around to calm her down. Alya did her best to keep her composed, but the blogger could barely keep up with the scenarios Marinette managed to create at the drop of a hat, and she couldn't hang around the hospital for too long. She had missed too much school already, and she would only suffer academically if she missed any more so close to finals.

Marinette was almost regretful that she healed so quickly, most likely thanks to wearing miraculous armor for so many years, and the doctor had predicted she would be out of the hospital in under two weeks. She'd be just in time for finals. Lucky her! Her papa had teased that she had timed her injury perfectly to finish school on time.

After doing nothing but physical therapy and homework for a week, however, Marinette insisted that she be taken outside at the first opportunity. Her papa gently lifted her from the bed to place her on the wheelchair and her maman pushed it out to the terraced garden in the back of the building. All three pretended they didn't notice the officer trailing after them.

Having spent so much time under the artificial lighting of her hospital room, Marinette was content to close her eyes and lean her head back, absorbing the rays of the sun. She'd take the time to watch the plants and smell the roses on the way back in. With her eyes closed like that, she clearly heard a soft thud in front of her and her papa gasp. Since nothing else happened, she kept her eyes closed, sure of her safety.

Then her maman coughed forcefully, "Do you want some coffee, Tom? How about you, Officer Raincomprix?"

Marinette blinked her eyes open to look over at her parents. Roger Raincomprix seemed to hesitate and then smiled uncomfortably, "Uh, yes, of course. Let's go to the cafeteria."

"You'll be alright here, right, Marinette?"

The blue eyed girl frowned at her mother, "I guess."

Her brows furrowed as she watched the three adults walk away just a bit too quickly. Marinette was confused as to what was happening until she felt something small and soft collide with her cheek.

"Marinette!" Tikki squealed in delight.

Huffing a laugh, Marinette cupped her hands around the kwami with a smile, "I'm so glad to see you, Tikki!"

The good luck god pulled back in order to boop her nose, "We were all really worried about you. What were you thinking?"

"Sorry, I was just. . ." her words trailed off as she realized something. Her parents didn't leave to give her the privacy to reunite with Tikki. Her parents didn't _know_ about Tikki. But, they did know about the person who was caring for the kwami. Her head snapped up and her eyes zeroed in on the black-clad figure that was only halfheartedly hiding behind a nearby tree.

Heart speeding up, a smile broke out on her face and she raised her arms as if reaching out to him. He seemed to obey instinctively, moving towards her without a word. "Chat, my lo-" the word tripped over her tongue. Did she still get to call him love? Did he still want her to?

Chat had frozen a few steps away from her and slowly she lowered her arms to her lap. His face was drawn, a tight frown on his lips, and his eyes guarded as they roamed over her. "Can you walk?" he finally spoke.

It wasn't what she expected, "Not very well, but I'm getting better really fast."

His eyes turned downwards and her heart sank as she realized he refused to look her in the eyes. "You. . . I can take care of Tikki, since it'll probably be hard to hide her in a hospital room."

Marinette bit the inside of her cheek, upset at his obvious avoidance of the elephant in the room. _He's disappointed,_ she thought. He didn't want her to be Ladybug. What if he thought her manipulative? Or if he couldn't forgive her lying to him?

"Okay," she agreed, unsure of how to go about salvaging her relationship. She had thought convincing her parents would be the hard part, but apparently they were willing to overlook the obvious danger in exchange for her happiness. Except her happiness was contingent upon Chat forgiving her for every lie she had told him since the first time they met as Chat Noir and Marinette.

Tikki hummed unhappily but didn't say anything to interrupt the tongue-tied silence that emerged between them.

"I should go," Chat said suddenly, and began walking backwards before she could offer even the smallest protest. The kwami dutifully floated over to his shoulder. "Before they're done with coffee. I. . . get better, Marinette."

He was gone as quickly as he had arrived, and she was left alone trying to fight off bitter tears. She never thought she would miss hearing him call her Princess.

* * *

Two days after that, Marinette decided enough was enough. She had healed well, and she had been cleared to leave her room. She could transform just fine, especially since all she needed to do was summon her Lucky Charm and use Miraculous Ladybug to undo the damage done during Volpina's reign of terror. Rena Rouge spent ten minutes trying to dissuade her, but Marinette refused to budge. Eventually, the heroine agreed to pass the information on to the others and somehow snuck the baggie Marinette's jewelry and clothes were kept in to her.

It was past visiting hours, her parents already well on their way home, when Carapace carried her onto the roof of the hospital. She was unsteady on her feet, but did her best to appear strong even as she leaned against the wall. Her teammates were looking at her like she was a fragile, little bird with a broken wing and Chat wasn't looking at her at all. _This_ was one of the reasons why she never wanted them to know Ladybug and Marinette were one person. The selfish part of her brain cared more about the loss of their respect than the inherent danger in sharing identities.

 _They already shared identities anyway,_ she frowned into the silence. "So, are you all going to watch or something?"

They seemed to realize just how _weird_ they were being and shuffled guiltily. Rena cleared her throat, "Well, would you like us to reveal ourselves to you?"

"Right now?" Marinette asked before she could help it. What did it matter _when_ they told her? She breathed angrily through her nose, "I mean, I guess."

Another discomfited silence descended, but it was short-lived. Queen B made a petulant noise that was strangely familiar yet completely unlike the blonde heroine, "Oh, just do it like ripping off a bandage!"

There was a flash of golden light and then there was a small, bee-like kwami buzzing around none other than Chloé Bourgeois. Marinette choked on her tongue and slapped a hand over her mouth to keep from screaming.

"Don't you start," the blonde sneered.

"But - but, B was my favorite!"

"What do you mean B was your favorite?" Rena demanded at the same time Chloé cheered.

Then she frowned, realizing what she was doing. "Geez, this is bittersweet."

"What do you mean B was your favorite?" Rena repeated as she dropped her transformation. "I am your best friend! How dare you not like me best?"

Marinette buried her face in her hands because that was _Alya!_ Alya, her best friend, the person that she turned to when she had nowhere else to turn. She peeked through her fingers at Carapace before turning back to Alya, "Please tell me you're cheating on Nino."

"Nope," the boy answered for her easily, turning back into the laidback DJ she knew and loved.

Marinette hid behind her fingers and sighed deeply. This was. . . not bad. Okay, the Chloé thing was pretty bad, but if she was Queen B, then she must not be completely terrible, right? Her friends with the mask on were her friends with the mask off. Plus Chloé. Whatever. That was a good thing! Right? Except. . .

Except nothing followed Nino's easy revelation that Carapace and Rena had broken the no sharing identities rule just so they could date as both identities but silence. Chat Noir wasn't offering to reveal himself to her and she didn't feel comfortable asking him to. It went on long enough that she heard B - Chloé - whoever - mutter "Is this going to be super awkward?" and she panicked.

"Tikki, spots on!"

She felt stronger as Ladybug. Physically, she could stand on her legs without needing to lean on anything. Emotionally, it was amazing how safe it made her feel to wear a mask. Even though everybody currently around her knew exactly who she was, she still felt like more than just Marinette. Wasting no time, she summoned Lucky Charm and then blinked at the object.

"I have no idea what I'm supposed to do with this," she stared at the ladybug patterned handcuffs.

"I do," Alya declared, grabbing Ladybug's arm and dragging her towards Chat. In the blink of an eye, she had snapped the cuffs shut around a wrist each.

"Alya!" they both cried.

"Talk," the brunette glared like an angry matron. "We're not going through another one of your break-ups. Talk things through. Work things out. We'll be on the other side of that door."

Ladybug spluttered as a blush bloomed on her face. Reaching out for her best friend, she stepped towards the retreating figures, only to be pulled back by Chat's still form. The door shut with a clang and she was left alone with her eerily quiet boyfriend. Maybe boyfriend. Was he still her boyfriend?

Oh, why would Alya do this to her? Why would _Tikki_ do this to her? Had they not learned by now that she is not the best when it comes to romantic entanglements? Give her a problem to puzzle out or an obstacle to overcome, and she wouldn't stop until she succeeded. But have her talk to the boy she loves and, well, there's a reason it took them four and a half years to date. There's a reason she never dated Adrien.

She didn't know where to start, and her blush only deepened the longer Chat refused to speak, his face turned away from her. How were they supposed to work through their problems if he won't even _look_ at her? What was she supposed to do if _she_ was the problem?

"I don't want you to be angry," Chat said suddenly, face still turned away. "If you find out who I am, I don't want you to be angry or disappointed or. . ."

Ladybug blinked, "You think _I'll_ be angry? I thought - I thought you'd be angry I didn't tell you I was Ladybug!"

He finally turned to look at her, eyes wide and sad, "I'm not. I'm happy, really. My first love and my -" he cut himself off and she tried not to wince because he wouldn't call her his mate. "It feels like it's fate, almost. Besides, I didn't tell you I was Chat Noir."

"Wait," she breathed. "I know you?"

"We're friends," he smiled ruefully. "At least, I like to think so. Sometimes, I doubt it, but you're nice to me. I just don't know if you'd be happy with me if I show you who I am."

Chat startled when Ladybug's gloved hand gently landed on his cheek, keeping his eyes trained on hers. It was probably the first time she had ever touched him so intimately while in costume, she realized, and she found herself smiling. "I love you. I love you for who you are, not what you look like beneath your mask. As long as your heart is the same, I promise I will love you the same no matter what name I call you."

His forehead pressed up against hers, "I love you too."

"You don't have to tell me if you're not ready yet," she offered quietly, noting how his voice shook.

"I do," he insisted. "I wanted to before, and now. . . I _have_ to. We found out who Hawk Moth is," he closed his eyes and plowed on before she could ask the obvious question. "It's my _father_ , Marinette. Hawk Moth is my father."

"It's okay," she soothed, her other arm wrapping around his shoulders. "We'll figure it out." She wasn't sure _how_ , but, "We'll do it together."

It seemed to be the right thing to say. Chat opened his eyes and offered her a shaky smile before she leaned forward to capture his lips. It was a soft kiss, barely more than just pressing their lips together, but it was exactly what she needed now that she felt too raw from her twisted up emotions. And, she thought, it was probably what he needed, too.

She barely heard the handcuffs clinking open and falling to the floor with a small clatter. Especially not over the familiar sound of miraculous magic releasing, and Plagg complaining about his chosen's romantic escapades. There was nowhere for him to hide. She was really going to see Chat Noir's mask-less face. Her insides quivered at the thought and she broke the kiss to take a step back.

With a deep breath she opened her eyes. . . and then promptly froze. Because that was Adrien Agreste. Chat Noir was Adrien. Her boyfriend was Adrien. The person she'd been having movie marathons and cuddle sessions with for three years was Adrien. She lost her virginity to Adrien! Her love was her first love. Her only love.

 _It feels like it's fate._

She couldn't help it, she burst out laughing!

Adrien blushed and gave her the kitten eyes and it looked _so much_ weirder without the mask, "You don't have to laugh."

She bit her lip in attempt to stop her laughter, but only managed to calm it into chuckles, "I'm sorry, it's just, you're you!" He raised an unimpressed eyebrow, but at least he didn't seem as embarrassed. "The reason Ladybug kept rejecting Chat Noir was because she had a crush on her classmate, Adrien, who never looked twice at her. You were my Ladybug!"

Adrien didn't seem as amused by the situation, "You mean to tell me I've been jealous of myself this entire time?"

Hysterical laughter bursting from her lips, Ladybug leaned down to pick up the handcuffs. Throwing it into the air, she called on the Miraculous Ladybug healing wave and watched as thousands of ladybugs flew into the air, out to the city, and into the hospital. She felt giddy with happiness, as if for once in her life, everything was going exactly as it was meant to.

Adrien was still pouting at her.

* * *

 **A/N:** Snuck a LadyNoir and Ladrien kiss in there, because ALL the sides of the Love Square need to kiss, dammit!

I've spent quite some time in hospitals, as patient, visitor, and employee, so hopefully there's not much complaints about the accuracy. First thing, **the doctor is NEVER there when the patient wakes up** , that's BS. Unless they're like a senator or something. Secondly, hospitals aren't as strict as they pretend to be, not even the fancy, expensive ones. I imagine western medicine is pretty much the same wherever its practiced. I've been on three continents, and that held true in all three.

Is a Tweety Bird/Looney Tunes allusion too old for this fandom? Maybe. But there you go.

This chapter's title comes from **Just Give Me a Reason by P!nk** , which is technically a breakup song, but is also quietly hopeful, so I thought it fit the tone. The full lyric is "Just give me a reason, just a little bit's enough/ Just a second we're not broken, just bent, and we can learn to love again."

As always let me know what you liked, didn't like, and what you thought could use improvement!

~ Destiny's Sweet Melody


	24. Watching the Sun Set

**A/N:** Oh my gosh, I totally forgot that I was going to be out of the city/away from my computer this week and didn't get back until today! Luckily, I had already typed up the chapter, and only needed to do some final editing. I'm so tired that I was considering updating until tomorrow just to make sure I don't miss any easily avoidable typos, but I don't want to ruin my perfect updating streak on the _final chapter!_ That time the website betrayed me doesn't count! I did comb through it a few times, though, so hopefully there aren't any more mistakes than usual.

Whenever I reach the final chapter of a fic, I'm reminded of that _Supernatural_ quote about how writing endings is hard because you can never satisfy everyone, but you have to end it however you feel is most genuine. So, I tried to do that, and hopefully you'll enjoy it!

 **To GuestXO:** I'm thrilled you liked the reveal! This final chapter is actually pretty epilogue-y, so I'm afraid this is the end of the line. Maybe you'll check out my next fic and like it just as much? Hopefully! ;)

 **To KwibKwib:** Yep, it was mostly unnecessary guilt. And Alya is perf!

 **The happy ending that I promised is here!**

* * *

 **All Your Love Is Revenge**

 **Ch. 24: Watching the Sun Set**

It took three more days for Marinette to be released from the hospital. Which was earlier than the doctor had predicted - and was probably due to the Miraculous Ladybug - but was far longer than Marinette was happy with. The magic had healed her just as well as it had healed her kidnappers, though she _did_ end up with an unsightly scar. She wasn't sure why, when the healing wave had always fixed everything so that it seemed like it never happened at all. Tikki wasn't sure either, and could only guess that it was some sort of cosmic reminder to make sure she learned her lesson.

Don't shoot yourself unless you're _really_ sure you'll be able to walk away from it.

"No, Marinette," Tikki frowned at her grin. "Don't shoot yourself at all!"

Marinette had inherited her father's awkward humor, and nobody seemed pleased at the easy way she referred to her injury. Especially not Adrien. It took a little bit of needling to find out that he had blamed himself for her getting shot. He seemed to be under the impression that she had been injured because he had been too slow at handing over his miraculous, and she'd had to admit that she had essentially shot herself.

Which only made things worse.

It was pretty unfair that the years' worth of good decisions and hare-brained schemes that had worked out for her meant nothing in the face of one bad decision. Okay, fine, it had been something close to eight months worth of bad decisions, but everybody was focusing on the last one! Nobody even cared about that whole friends with benefits thing anymore. It was irrelevant when compared to knowing Hawk Moth's identity.

Nobody really knew what to _do_ about that. It wasn't as easy as just tipping off the police when he practically lived in a fortress, and nobody wanted to be the one to suggest they go attack Adrien's father. He seemed miserable enough about it already, reproaching himself as if his father's every crime was somehow his fault. As if he could have stopped him somehow.

Adrien had been bouncing between Nino's house and Chloé's hotel since he had all but made himself homeless. He loved his father, but he couldn't trust him to not attack him while he was sleeping. But it was a system that couldn't last forever, since their parents would get suspicious as to why Adrien was sleeping over so often.

"Do you think it would be okay if we tell my parents?" Marinette asked quietly.

He had been sleeping in her room every night since she got out of the hospital and her parents knew about it. They made a place for him at the breakfast table, and bid him a goodnight when he followed Marinette up to her room. Maman would offer him cookies whenever he fell into one of his sullen silences, and Papa would cajole him into playing video games. They both pointedly refused to accept his self-remonstration whenever he brought up Marinette's kidnapping.

He practically lived there already! They just didn't know he was Adrien.

"They probably would have found out eventually," she continued when all he did was stare at her. All they really had to do was poke their heads into her room, since he spent all his time untransformed now. They didn't though, since they probably expected them to be doing _things_ that no parent wanted to witness. They weren't though. There had been no _things_ since their first, and last, date.

She tried to not feel a little rejected by that. It was more important that he was _there_ , that he slept beside her through the night, that he told her he loved her every morning. But, well, she was used to it! It wasn't a crime to want sex, was it?

Besides, if things continued the way they were right now, if the ring he gave her was an actual promise, a forever kind of promise, then the truth would have to come out eventually. The world, and her parents, still believed she was dating Chat Noir, which meant she couldn't show Adrien any sort of affection. It couldn't last forever, and she didn't want it to.

She wanted to go on dates and hold his hand and just be together. Without having to worry whether somebody saw them or not.

"I know it's unfair to ask you to reveal yourself to them," especially since she had no intention of doing so. Nobody had connected Marinette's improving health with Ladybug finally using her magic - _thank you, miraculous glamour_ \- and so her identity wasn't in any real danger. "But, that way you could move in, officially. If you want to, I mean. We could share the room, or we could find a place for you if you don't want to. You're used to a much bigger room, aren't you? And, I mean, I could get a dorm in the fall. Or you can! So, it'll just be for the summer, if you really think about it. It's not - it's too soon to be moving in together, but -"

"Okay," he interrupted with an easy smile. "I'd like living with you."

 _Oh!_

It probably _was_ moving too fast, but it's not like they had paced themselves at any point in their relationship.

"Aren't you going to ask us if you're _allowed_?" Tikki huffed from where she was sitting on the rafters. Plagg stared boredly beside her.

Marinette hummed in thought, "Nope."

The red kwami frowned, even as the black one grinned at her flippant attitude. It was a little strange how well she got along with Plagg now that she wasn't causing his chosen undue pain. Of _course_ , Adrien got the fun, uninhibited kwami, while she got the stern, responsible one. Then she thought just how reckless she would have been with Plagg whispering in her ear and she realized Master Fu knew what he was doing.

"Should we tell them now?" Adrien asked curiously.

Marinette let her eyes wander to her digital clock. It wasn't terribly late, and maybe it would be best to give them a whole night to think over her proposal. What was it Chloé had said? Do it like ripping off a band-aid!

"Sure," she sat up in bed and then sighed heavily. "Ugh, they know I've been in love with you since day one. They're never going to let me live this down!"

* * *

Her parents accepted Chat Noir's secret identity with frightening ease. It almost made her think they would accept her being Ladybug just as easily. Almost; she wasn't dumb enough to test it. She was more confident that they would try to ground her for life if they knew how frequently she jumped into danger. The only reason they didn't do so now was because they were confident Marinette wouldn't be in regular danger.

There hadn't been any akuma attacks since Volpina, and nobody was eager to hurt Chat Noir's girlfriend. Not after he had almost murdered the last idiots that tried. Marinette was as safe as she could be.

Getting Gabriel Agreste to agree to letting his son move out was a bit harder. Adrien had left his house with nothing but the clothes on his back. He had a bank account under his name where half his earnings went to, the other half going to a trust fund that he didn't doubt his father would pull from him if he refused to bow to his will. He was fine with letting the money go - though he felt bad about not being allowed to pay rent - but there were things in his room that he wanted.

Precious things, memories of his mother and his friends and even his father from before all this madness started.

It took Chloé showing up with a moving truck and a small battalion of hired security to allow Adrien to pick up his things.

Gabriel glowered at Marinette from where she stood beside his son. She did her best not to quail, to remember that he hadn't the smallest inkling she had the other miraculous he was desperately searching for. To focus on the way Adrien was gripping her hand, like she was the only thing keeping him grounded in this world.

"You don't ever touch Marinette again," Adrien hissed at his father. "You never so much as speak her name again. Or I swear to you, I will take my miraculous and disappear and you will never find it."

As far as last words went, they weren't the best between a father and son. And they did very little to help decide what they were going to do about the Gabriel situation. It was very romantic of him to put his girlfriend above all other things, but Marinette was Ladybug and she knew something would have to be done. No matter how much it hurt him.

It could wait a little longer, though. At least, there hadn't been any akuma attacks since he found out Chat Noir was his son. That had to count for something, didn't it?

* * *

Classes were winding down into little more than social gatherings, final exams already done and final grades already decided, when the next akuma attack hit right there on school grounds. Marinette was pretty sure she could see the exact moment Adrien's heart split in two at the realization his father was perfectly willing to literally go right through him in order to reach his goal.

Nino had quietly offered to be the one to help Ladybug deal with the akuma, but Adrien had mutely shrugged the offer away.

At least it was over quickly. But Chat Noir seemed so lost, just stood there and looked confused even as Ladybug snuck away to drop her transformation. Marinette couldn't help but worry, about his well-being as well as the fact that his miraculous was counting down and he was making no attempts to get away. So, she did the only rational thing she could think of.

She ran right up to him and pulled him into a hug.

"Marinette!" Chat startled and whipped his head around, finally seeming to notice the sizeable crowd around them.

"Come with me," she whispered and pulled him towards the nearest lavatory. She took a moment to check that all the stalls were empty and then locked the door behind them.

There was a flash of green light and when she turned again Adrien was smiling bashfully at her, "I'm sorry, I messed up, didn't I?"

"It's not like anybody expected this to be easy for you," Marinette answered breezily. For all that he loved being a hero, it must not be simple to fight against somebody he loved. Somebody that had been all he'd had for too long. She approached him again slowly and placed a hand against his cheek. "You don't have to try so hard."

Adrien sighed and leaned his forehead against hers, "I know, but -"

But he wanted to. Sometimes, she thought there was a part of him that enjoyed taking on other people's burdens. "And you can't blame yourself for this either."

He closed his eyes, "I _know._ "

"And don't get snappish with me."

"I'm _not_ ," he whined and straightened up.

Marinette smiled and leaned forward to press a quick kiss against his lips, "Did you know that I love you?"

His arms wrapped around her waist and pulled her closer to him, smiling softly, "I had a small inkling. I love you, too."

Wrapping her arms around his shoulders, she pulled him down into a longer kiss and he purred in response. It still surprised her that he could do that even when not transformed. She felt a bit cheated that she hadn't gotten any cool side effects due to the ladybug miraculous. "Did you know that I like it when you kiss me and touch me?"

Adrien blushed vibrantly, "I like that, too."

"Did you know it's been like a month since the last time we had sex?"

It was like flipping a switch.

He pulled back quickly, "Really? In the _bathroom?_ "

Marinette frowned petulantly. Was he really going to be picky about it? _He_ was the one that had no problem with having her in a random clearing and in an alleyway. Not to mention that time he'd gone down on her in the middle of a very busy public attraction! Who was he to judge her for her choice in scenery for sex?

"What did you bring me in here for, anyway? I thought we agreed that you were going to 'break up' with Chat Noir so that you can date me publicly!"

"Excuse you! Everyone in school thinks I'm in a loving relationship, and I'm not going to destroy that just because you can't wait a week for the semester to be over." Besides, she had seen the video. _The_ video, because she was a bit of a masochist, but also the video of Chat Noir taking her to the hospital. She had seen how distraught he had been, how bereft he had seemed when she was taken from him by the hospital staff. No one in the comment section of _that_ video seemed to have any doubts that Chat truly and deeply loved her. Honestly, even knowing that she was "dumping" Chat Noir for his other self, she kind of felt like a bitch about it. And she had no doubt that the rest of the world would agree with that sentiment.

She stuck her tongue out at him and waved the hand with the princess ring in front of his face. "Do you see that? That means I'm in a committed relationship with a super cool superhero."

"You're living with me," he seemed to be holding back laughter. "How are you supposed to resist my model good looks?"

"Yeah, but nobody knows that," she reminded him. "Besides, we're living together as friends. Maybe after three or so years of cohabitation I could be persuaded to see you as more, but, you see, when I choose to love somebody, I _really_ commit to it."

"Oh really?" Adrien placed a hand behind her head. She grinned and nodded sharply. "We'll have to see about that, won't we?"

He pulled her into a deeper kiss, his body pressing into hers, pushing her back until she made contact with a stall door. Blindly reaching, she opened it and pulled him in after her. It was a bit of a tight fit, and the cramped quarters made her overheat quickly. She hadn't been sure if she wanted to strip down completely since, well, it _was_ a public bathroom, but she hastily made the choice to pull her shirt over her head.

Adrien's hands pulled at the button on her pants before he kneeled to help drag them and her underwear down her legs and slip her shoes off. His head cocked to the side suddenly, and she didn't have the time to wonder what had gotten his attention before his lips connected with her scar. She gasped sharply when she felt his tongue trace its outline. It was probably just her imagination that made it feel especially sensitive, or maybe the fact that she was so wound up due to lack of sex, but she almost felt like she could come from that action alone.

Tugging his hair just a tad bit too tightly, she pulled him back to his full height. Attaching her lips on his pulse point, she reached down to the hem of his shirt. It wasn't until she leaned back to lift his shirt off him that she had a moment of clarity and realized that this was going to be the first time they had sex with the lights on while they could actually see each other.

And it was in a _bathroom._

Marinette burst out laughing, "Hi."

He seemed to realize it at the same time and offered her a crooked smile, "Hi."

Well, it wasn't like anything else in their relationship had been normal!

Quickly unbuttoning his pants and chucking them and his boxers down his thighs, she pulled him against her. She helped him position himself while he lifted her up against the wall. Wrapping her legs around his waist for better leverage, she sighed longingly as he slipped inside her.

"That's my favorite sound in the world," he admitted with a shaky breath in her ear.

She couldn't stop the peal of laughter that escaped her. She couldn't even stop to wonder what the people that must surely be lingering outside the door were thinking was going on inside.

"Second favorite," he corrected just before he began to move.

Marinette reached one hand towards the top of the stall to help her meet his thrusts, "My favorite sound is when you say my name as you come."

Adrien growled and caught her in a harsh kiss, his hips moving in frantic, jerky thrusts. "I'm not going to last long at all if you keep talking like that," he sounded genuinely apologetic.

She reached for his other hand and guided his thumb towards her clitoris. She groaned when he ground the digit against her bundle of nerves. "That's fine," she panted desperately. "We can always try again tonight."

It was absolutely _not_ too soon to move in together. Living together was the best thing ever. She might genuinely go insane if she couldn't do this on a regular basis.

"Deal," he agreed, and ducked his head to mouth at her breasts through her bra.

"Adrien," she mewled and felt him bite down suddenly.

He looked up at her. "Say that again," he requested, tone almost reverent.

A smile tugged at Marinette's lips, " _Adrien._ "

* * *

"You are ridiculous," Alya chided when Marinette reappeared in class, her hair pulled out of its pigtails and shirt visibly wrinkled.

"I regret nothing," Marinette insisted. Well, she sort of regretted the fact that she was all sweaty, but it was a worthwhile exchange for a mind-blowing orgasm.

"Did you not think it might be suspicious that Adrien was missing at the same time as you?" her best friend questioned quietly.

It was a valid worry, but Marinette was prepared, "Adrien was heartbroken that his crush took her boyfriend for a quickie on school grounds and decided to leave for home. He won't be back until tomorrow."

"Nice to see how quick-witted you can be when sex is on the line," Alya deadpanned.

Marinette only smiled, "It's really good sex though."

* * *

Her room - er, their room - was honestly really crowded. She was probably going to have to choose a day to go through all her old things and decide what she was willing to throw out to make more space. She may even have to get a dorm come fall anyway, just so that at least one of them could be comfortable. Of course, she'd probably be spending more nights here than in her dorm anyway, but it was the thought that counted.

"I don't want to be a bother," Adrien insisted. "I can throw out some of my things."

The things he forced himself to face his father for because he couldn't live without them? "Not a chance! Maman's been wanting me to throw some things out anyway. She's worried I might become a hoarder or something."

Marinette wasn't a hoarder, just a little messy. But, like, weren't messy rooms a sign of genius or something?

Adrien smiled, "You know, relationships are supposed to be about compromise. I can't ask you to change everything about your life for me and not give anything up in return."

"You nearly killed four men for me. I think that's quite a sacrifice," she pointed out.

"You nearly killed _yourself_ for me. That's a bigger sacrifice!"

"I told you, that was an accident! I was hoping the bullet would hit my leg or something." She had slammed the gun down, hadn't she? How was she supposed to know an itchy trigger finger worked quicker than gravity?

"And I wasn't even thinking when I attacked those men. I just wanted to get to you."

Oh, well, that was really sweet! Did he really think he was helping his case? There was no way she was going to let him get rid of anything after that.

"Are you two really arguing over which one's been the biggest martyr for your love?" Plagg interrupted, an unimpressed look on his face. "Because Adrien wins hands down. You should have seen him when you dumped him! He wrote you a poem, do you want to hear it?"

Adrien blushed violently, "Plagg, don't you dare!"

"Oh please," Tikki smiled beside her fellow kwami. "Marinette's been _much_ worse than him! You should have seen all those plots she's set up over the years while trying to get Adrien's attention."

"Wait, what plots?" Adrien questioned.

Marinette waved her arms around wildly, "There were no plots! Just - we're not throwing anything away! We'll live in a cramped mess forever and be done with it!"

"Okay," Adrien smiled adoringly at her and she felt her heartbeat quicken. "I don't mind, as long as it's forever."

Well, he might actually win this round of who was the bigger romantic. But she was determined to give him a run for his money in all the years to come.

* * *

 **A/N:** We are finally done! I hope it's to everyone's satisfaction. I purposely left the whole Hawk Moth thing a little vague because this was never a Defeat Hawk Moth type of fic, it was a **No More Secrets type of fic.** And, to be honest, I wasn't even sure what I was doing when I started it, and it just kind of turned into all this.

This chapter's title is (translated) from **Mírame Bien (Really Look At Me) by Julieta Venegas** , which is a song about a relationship starting over after a tragedy/hardship, but being determined to make it work. The full lyrics are "Really look at me, I need you just as much/ Doing something as small as watching the day go by/ Really look at me, and tell me if you see me/ Doing something as simple as watching the sun set."

This is honestly one of the - if not _the most_ \- popular fanfic I've ever written, so I hope you all enjoyed it!

 **Thank you to everyone that reviewed, added this story to their alerts, or added it to their favorites!** You guys gave me life! The amount of dedication you showed this fic always put a smile on my face and, in light of all the recent suckishness of my job, it was the highlight of my week. **Special Thanks** to everyone that actually had conversations with me and offered help out of the goodness of your hearts. I'd list you all, but I tried and it was almost a paragraph all its own! **Everyone was so great!**

If you have read this far:

 **Thank you so much for reading!**

Pretty please, review and let me know what you liked, didn't like, and what you thought could use improvement! That way, if you ever stumble on another one of my fics, it might be better than this one! :D

~ Destiny's Sweet Melody


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